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Posted: 3/9/2006 3:38:01 PM EDT
Just got back from an international airline trip. My flight attendants looked like a bunch of bag ladies. One was wearing a gray sweatshirt instead of her uniform jacket. Another went everywear carrying a gallon jug of water in her hand, because she only drinks water from her own house. Every one of them was overweight. Most were burned-out, bitter "cat-ranchers".

Anyway, they watched a bunch of Singapore Air flight attendants (who were all perfectly-groomed 98-pound babes) bow to their captain.

They spent the next three days at about 6,000 RPM.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:41:45 PM EDT
cat-rancher


I like that.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:44:04 PM EDT
Were you on Budget Airlines by any chance?
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:46:09 PM EDT
You can thank the elimination of age/ height / weight guidelines for US flight attendants.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:47:34 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Rodent:
<Snip> she only drinks water from her own house. <Snip>


Nyaaahhhh...she's not crazy. That's simply cautious and prudent. Thinking ahead. Covering all the bases. She'd be a fine catch for a man who "knows how to treat a woman", but, you know, men like that are "so hard to find" she just opts to stay single. With her jug.

I want to reiterate she's NOT a raving, paranoid lunatic.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:49:10 PM EDT

I'v noticed a sharp decline in the number of flight attendant babes in the past few years as well.

Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:50:43 PM EDT

Originally Posted By johnrj:
Were you on Budget Airlines by any chance?



We're ALL "Budget Airlines" nowadays.

That's another thing - I'm pretty tired of taking crap from passengers who paid $89 for a ticket and are irate because they didn't get the meal choice they wanted or something.
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:55:38 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/9/2006 3:56:13 PM EDT by Magoo6541]

Originally Posted By Rodent:

Anyway, they watched a bunch of Singapore Air flight attendants (who were all perfectly-groomed 98-pound babes) bow to their captain.





I've flown on Singapore Air... The BEST airline in the world. Every seat was like you were in 1st class. ALL the seats had personal TVs with a HUGE selection of games or current movies to watch. ALL the seats reclined and had foot rests. You could almost lay all the way back, well... maybe not really but it sure seemed like you could.

And +1 about the Singapore flight attendants... Wowza
Link Posted: 3/9/2006 3:55:52 PM EDT
If that chick is ever one of my flight attendants I'm going to whisper to her conspiratorially that it's obvious she's on to something and that I've decided to only drink water from her house, too.

The question is: will she share the jug?
Link Posted: 3/21/2006 6:08:45 PM EDT
Speaking of Feninazis, I really nailed one cold a while back.

She gave me shit about holding the door as I entered K-Mart.

Payback came about 15 minutes later when i cut through the shoe department. She was trying on a pair of shoes.

"Blacksmith's down the road that way, about a mile and a half," I said to her.
Link Posted: 3/21/2006 6:23:05 PM EDT

Originally Posted By piccolo:
Speaking of Feninazis, I really nailed one cold a while back.

She gave me shit about holding the door as I entered K-Mart.

Payback came about 15 minutes later when i cut through the shoe department. She was trying on a pair of shoes.

"Blacksmith's down the road that way, about a mile and a half," I said to her.




Link Posted: 3/21/2006 6:24:56 PM EDT

Originally Posted By piccolo:
Speaking of Feninazis, I really nailed one cold a while back.

She gave me shit about holding the door as I entered K-Mart.

Payback came about 15 minutes later when i cut through the shoe department. She was trying on a pair of shoes.

"Blacksmith's down the road that way, about a mile and a half," I said to her.



Link Posted: 3/21/2006 6:39:16 PM EDT

Originally Posted By tc556guy:
You can thank the elimination of age/ height / weight guidelines for US flight attendants.


+1 While it is indeed unfair to kick an attendant out for being unattractive, it sure did make flying feel more exclusive.

I flew Avensa (Venezula, pre belly up), and OH MY, all the customer facing women were drop dead gorgeous.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:05:22 AM EDT

Originally Posted By piccolo:
Speaking of Feninazis, I really nailed one cold a while back.

She gave me shit about holding the door as I entered K-Mart.

Payback came about 15 minutes later when i cut through the shoe department. She was trying on a pair of shoes.

"Blacksmith's down the road that way, about a mile and a half," I said to her.





Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:09:12 AM EDT
I always get shit from some girls about holding the door for them.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:12:39 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Rodent:

Originally Posted By johnrj:
Were you on Budget Airlines by any chance?



We're ALL "Budget Airlines" nowadays.

That's another thing - I'm pretty tired of taking crap from passengers who paid $89 for a ticket and are irate because they didn't get the meal choice they wanted or something.



I work hard for that $89 dollars! You will bow down and serve me.
I feel for you. I think you should be given free passes to slap someone every flight. Just one person though. I can see it now

passenger-"Where is my DRINK?" "What the HELL kind of airline is this"
you- "SLAP STFU, oh and enjoy the rest of your flight"

Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:15:05 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/22/2006 4:16:28 AM EDT by billparadise]
They just need a good slap upside the head, some excercise and most important,

Make me a god damn sammich.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:15:54 AM EDT
So... we are talking about STEWARDESSES, right? the 101st Airborne Skank Division? the Overpaid, High-altitude, Waitress Brigade? the In-flight Bitch-Fest Patrol?

Oh for the good old days when a hardworking pilot could get head from a hot stewardess, all while on final approach......

Now, Jeezus.... the world is a fucked-up place isn't it?


I have many friends in the aviation industry as pilots... ohh the stories they can tell, unfortunately they are all the bad ones about either complete whores, or complete bitches...

I have heard about the rules that American has now regarding "offensive behavior".... You guys would not BELIEVE how pathetic it is... ANYTHING you say that "offends" another person can get your ass canned, no questions or anything.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:18:37 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Rodent:

Singapore Air flight attendants












Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:24:08 AM EDT

Originally Posted By VooDoo3dfx:
I always get shit from some girls about holding the door for them.



I hold the door pretty often, and that's never happened to me. Not all of them say thank you, but I've never gotten any lip about it.

Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:25:42 AM EDT

Originally Posted By VooDoo3dfx:
I always get shit from some girls about holding the door for them.



Holding the door open in NC is mandatory.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:30:16 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Rodent:
Just got back from an international airline trip. My flight attendants looked like a bunch of bag ladies. One was wearing a gray sweatshirt instead of her uniform jacket. Another went everywear carrying a gallon jug of water in her hand, because she only drinks water from her own house. Every one of them was overweight. Most were burned-out, bitter "cat-ranchers".

Anyway, they watched a bunch of Singapore Air flight attendants (who were all perfectly-groomed 98-pound babes) bow to their captain.

They spent the next three days at about 6,000 RPM.



I know about those!
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:31:33 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Rodent:

Originally Posted By johnrj:
Were you on Budget Airlines by any chance?



We're ALL "Budget Airlines" nowadays.

That's another thing - I'm pretty tired of taking crap from passengers who paid $89 for a ticket and are irate because they didn't get the meal choice they wanted or something.



If you hadnt scarfed down that sammich that was ment for the passengers, I would have given you so much crap. But I saw you and your co-pilot eating my sammich!


Link Posted: 3/22/2006 4:41:36 AM EDT

Originally Posted By VooDoo3dfx:
I always get shit from some girls about holding the door for them.





It doesn't seem to happen as much as it used to a while back.

Generally I answer them that I was brought up with MANNERS and point out that the last person I held the door for was a footbal player. I can generally humiliate them if i play my cards right.

About 4-5 years ago, it happened to me and the little old lady behind HER gave her holy hell and a rap with a cane for 'ruining it things her'. TRhe ass eating Grandma gave the little braided armpitted little twit was priceless.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 5:47:05 AM EDT
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 5:50:49 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Rodent:
Just got back from an international airline trip. My flight attendants looked like a bunch of bag ladies. One was wearing a gray sweatshirt instead of her uniform jacket. Another went everywear carrying a gallon jug of water in her hand, because she only drinks water from her own house. Every one of them was overweight. Most were burned-out, bitter "cat-ranchers".

Anyway, they watched a bunch of Singapore Air flight attendants (who were all perfectly-groomed 98-pound babes) bow to their captain.

They spent the next three days at about 6,000 RPM.



Oh, Oh, I know this one.

First leg was AA.

Second leg was JAL.

What do I win??
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 6:02:28 AM EDT

Originally Posted By piccolo:

Originally Posted By VooDoo3dfx:
I always get shit from some girls about holding the door for them.





It doesn't seem to happen as much as it used to a while back.

Generally I answer them that I was brought up with MANNERS and point out that the last person I held the door for was a footbal player. I can generally humiliate them if i play my cards right.

About 4-5 years ago, it happened to me and the little old lady behind HER gave her holy hell and a rap with a cane for 'ruining it things her'. TRhe ass eating Grandma gave the little braided armpitted little twit was priceless.



'Don't flatter yourself ma'am, I open it for male dogs too'.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 6:07:06 AM EDT
Wimminz in loose shoes! Fargin' HAGS!

I would have loved to see their reaction to those SA hotties!

Link Posted: 3/22/2006 6:10:09 AM EDT

Originally Posted By dolanp:
[
'Don't flatter yourself ma'am, I open it for male dogs too'.





I will add that one to my repoitoire. Thanks.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 6:12:01 AM EDT
The flight attendants on Lan Chile. Oh, my.


I have maybe seen one or two decent looking attendants on domestic carriers in the past 15 years. It seems they are all staffed by hags and fags these days.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 6:15:22 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/22/2006 6:21:30 AM EDT by dolanp]

Originally Posted By Bama-Shooter:
The flight attendants on Lan Chile. Oh, my.


I have maybe seen one or two decent looking attendants on domestic carriers in the past 15 years. It seems they are all staffed by hags and fags these days.



I wonder if unions are to blame there. Seems like most of the flight attendents are nasty old ladies who've been doing it since they were 20.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 6:20:24 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/22/2006 6:22:52 AM EDT by LWilde]
This is an age test...

Any of you guys remember the stews who worked for Pacific Southwest Airlines?

I remember an interview with their director of player personnel way back when. The dude flat-ass admitted he hired babes based on their looks first. He said they could train anybody...but the looks were what really counted. Since they ferried thousands of businessmen up and down the Left Coast daily, all that eye candy was a real deal.

Man...those ladies WERE hawt too...

Go here...and scroll down:

PSA Stews...

PS: More on the next page too...
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 6:47:41 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Rodent:
Just got back from an international airline trip. My flight attendants looked like a bunch of bag ladies. One was wearing a gray sweatshirt instead of her uniform jacket. Another went everywear carrying a gallon jug of water in her hand, because she only drinks water from her own house. Every one of them was overweight. Most were burned-out, bitter "cat-ranchers".

Anyway, they watched a bunch of Singapore Air flight attendants (who were all perfectly-groomed 98-pound babes) bow to their captain.

They spent the next three days at about 6,000 RPM.



So that's the clucking noise I could hear the other day from 30,000 feet.

BTW the way you describe the FAs you must work for Northworst.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 6:54:24 AM EDT

Originally Posted By piccolo:
Speaking of Feninazis, I really nailed one cold a while back.

She gave me shit about holding the door as I entered K-Mart.

Payback came about 15 minutes later when i cut through the shoe department. She was trying on a pair of shoes.

"Blacksmith's down the road that way, about a mile and a half," I said to her.



Link Posted: 3/22/2006 7:22:29 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/22/2006 7:27:05 AM EDT by GotGuns]
Flying on Malaysia Airlines in 2 days. I hope it's full of 98 pound babes. I also hope they "love me long time."

ETA it seems like most of the smaller airlines and foreign airlines still have the ability to hire hotties without stirring up a shitstorm. Frontier airlines (based in Denver) is always nice and the flights I've taken on Canadian airlines are always nice.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 7:28:15 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Echo_Hotel:

Originally Posted By Rodent:
<Snip> she only drinks water from her own house. <Snip>


Nyaaahhhh...she's not crazy. That's simply cautious and prudent. Thinking ahead. Covering all the bases. She'd be a fine catch for a man who "knows how to treat a woman", but, you know, men like that are "so hard to find" she just opts to stay single. With her jug.

I want to reiterate she's NOT a raving, paranoid lunatic.



Just look at her and with a deadly serious tone, say, "I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids. "
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 7:41:37 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Magoo6541:

Originally Posted By Rodent:

Anyway, they watched a bunch of Singapore Air flight attendants (who were all perfectly-groomed 98-pound babes) bow to their captain.





I've flown on Singapore Air... The BEST airline in the world. Every seat was like you were in 1st class. ALL the seats had personal TVs with a HUGE selection of games or current movies to watch. ALL the seats reclined and had foot rests. You could almost lay all the way back, well... maybe not really but it sure seemed like you could.

And +1 about the Singapore flight attendants... Wowza



Don't touch though. The canings can be severe!
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 7:52:03 AM EDT

Has anyone ever flown Hooter's Air?

Link Posted: 3/22/2006 8:00:04 AM EDT
I actually don't mind what they look like as long as they are professional. The problem is that a lot of the old cows aren't professional--I have experienced plenty of Northworst battleaxes on overseas flights. It is a big shock to get off the Northworst plane in Amsterdam and transfer to the KLM flight where the FAs are businesslike, efficient, and professional.

GunLvr
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 8:33:23 AM EDT
The best flight attendant I've ever seen in action was the most flamin' gay guy I'd ever seen... I mean.. This guy was La Cage o' Follie to the max!
There was an in-flight crisis with a very unruly passenger... all the FA's 'cept for gay Serge seemed to flee... This bon vivant stepped up and really took charge...
The guys lisp and body language was so over the top I though that he was putting it on for entertainment value.... Not so. This fella was uber ghey yet so good at his job
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 9:06:20 AM EDT
I will only fly foriegn airlines for international flights. I flew British Air to Germany last fall, still in cattle class, but it was clean, the food was decent and FAs were professional.
I will NEVER again fly United or Continental, anywhere.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 9:22:01 AM EDT
While in uniform, I've had a waitress dump a can of Sprite right on my crotch for absolutely no reason.

She literally just walked up, poured it on, and walked away. I do not remember which airline. Totally flabergasted... Perhaps she had an "issue" with a previous military passenger or something...

Flying domestically is nothing like it was back in the 70's.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 9:28:27 AM EDT

Originally Posted By piccolo:
Speaking of Feninazis, I really nailed one cold a while back.

She gave me shit about holding the door as I entered K-Mart.

Payback came about 15 minutes later when i cut through the shoe department. She was trying on a pair of shoes.

"Blacksmith's down the road that way, about a mile and a half," I said to her.



Knocked that one out of the park!!!!!!!!
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 9:29:25 AM EDT

Originally Posted By GySgtD:
While in uniform, I've had a waitress dump a can of Sprite right on my crotch for absolutely no reason.

She literally just walked up, poured it on, and walked away. I do not remember which airline. Totally flabergasted... Perhaps she had an "issue" with a previous military passenger or something...

Flying domestically is nothing like it was back in the 70's.



How recently was this? By waitress do you mean stewardess?

Link Posted: 3/22/2006 9:38:18 AM EDT

Originally Posted By AvengeR15:

Originally Posted By GySgtD:
While in uniform, I've had a waitress dump a can of Sprite right on my crotch for absolutely no reason.

She literally just walked up, poured it on, and walked away. I do not remember which airline. Totally flabergasted... Perhaps she had an "issue" with a previous military passenger or something...

Flying domestically is nothing like it was back in the 70's.



How recently was this? By waitress do you mean stewardess?




I woulda raised some hell with her supervisor or the airline... once I was back on the ground and not in danger of being accused of causing trouble on a commercial flight or some such BS...
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 10:41:10 AM EDT

Originally Posted By GySgtD:
While in uniform, I've had a waitress dump a can of Sprite right on my crotch for absolutely no reason.

She literally just walked up, poured it on, and walked away. I do not remember which airline. Totally flabergasted... Perhaps she had an "issue" with a previous military passenger or something...

Flying domestically is nothing like it was back in the 70's.





Probably the tw3in sister of the bitch that spit on me at Logan right after I got outy of basic in the early 70s, Gunny.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 11:40:27 AM EDT
Excuse me. I meant to say "stewardess", not waitress. The date was on or around May 1989; flying into John Wayne.

The young Pvt. D was still a babe in the woods back then, and was more concerned with checking into his first command after boot camp than he was about getting payback.

I still have no idea what was going through her head. On drugs, perhaps?
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 11:44:39 AM EDT
KLM still has "nice" crews.
Link Posted: 3/22/2006 11:47:38 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 3/22/2006 11:48:42 AM EDT by danno-in-michigan]

Originally Posted By Girlieman:
The best flight attendant I've ever seen in action was the most flamin' gay guy I'd ever seen... I mean.. This guy was La Cage o' Follie to the max!
There was an in-flight crisis with a very unruly passenger... all the FA's 'cept for gay Serge seemed to flee... This bon vivant stepped up and really took charge...
The guys lisp and body language was so over the top I though that he was putting it on for entertainment value.... Not so. This fella was uber ghey yet so good at his job



Gee, I wonder who you're talking about.
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