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Posted: 2/11/2006 1:24:04 PM EDT
1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It.

. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way, Unique Up On It.

3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
They Take The Psycho Path

4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil The Hell Out Of It.

5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
Dam!

6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice Too Long?
Polaroid's

7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
A Stick

8.. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
Nacho Cheese.

9.. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
Subordinate Clauses.

10. What Do ou Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
Quattro Sinko.

11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
Spoiled Milk.

12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
Frostbite.

13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
A Nervous Wreck.

14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
Anyone Can Roast Beef. Can You Pea Soup?

15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
Right Where You Left Him.

16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
Because They Have Big Fingers.

17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
Because It Scares The Dog.

18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
Sanka.

19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?

The Location Of The Dirt Bag.

20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.

21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!
A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.

22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer




I needed that.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 1:33:49 PM EDT
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 1:37:09 PM EDT


One more ocean joke:

What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic?

Halfway there.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 1:44:32 PM EDT
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 1:44:39 PM EDT
. for later
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 1:52:38 PM EDT
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 1:56:06 PM EDT

Originally Posted By tc6969:

Originally Posted By COZ_45:
Whaddya call a dog with no legs?

Nothing because it won't come when you call it.


Whddya call a guy with no arms and no legs stuck on the wall?

Art

On the beach?

Sandy




.


On the front porch?

Mat.



In the ocean?


Bob
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 1:59:00 PM EDT
What do you call a thousand lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A good start.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 2:00:50 PM EDT

Originally Posted By 6of1:

Originally Posted By tc6969:

Originally Posted By COZ_45:
Whaddya call a dog with no legs?

Nothing because it won't come when you call it.


Whddya call a guy with no arms and no legs stuck on the wall?

Art

On the beach?

Sandy




.


On the front porch?

Mat.



In the ocean?


Bob




In your mailbox? Bill
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 2:03:16 PM EDT

Originally Posted By 6of1:

Originally Posted By tc6969:

Originally Posted By COZ_45:
Whaddya call a dog with no legs?

Nothing because it won't come when you call it.


Whddya call a guy with no arms and no legs stuck on the wall?

Art

On the beach?

Sandy




.


On the front porch?

Mat.



In the ocean?


Bob



In a pile of leaves?
Rustle.

On the grill?
Frank. And his girlfriend?
Patty.


Link Posted: 2/11/2006 2:04:15 PM EDT
What do you call a redheaded Chinese person?

Something Wong.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 2:04:21 PM EDT
What is the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?

One is a bottom feeding, slime sucking creature and one is just a fish.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 2:05:33 PM EDT
tag
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 2:05:46 PM EDT
Anyone Can Roast Beef. Can You Pea Soup?


yes, but a good strong series of antibiotics cleared that right up.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 2:08:00 PM EDT

Originally Posted By VooDoo3dfx:

22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer




How are a tornado and marriage alike?

It all starts with a lot of sucking and blowing, and then someone loses a house.
Link Posted: 2/11/2006 2:10:05 PM EDT
What is the difference between your job and marriage?

After 10 years your job STILL sucks.
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