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Posted: 12/20/2005 10:10:47 AM EDT
Right now, we are in the middle of a booming lunch rush at the restaurant, 1.5hr wait for 2 people to sit down etc, what can I say, it's the holidays .

Anyhoo, I left my office for a few minutes from getting my holiday payroll ready for Christmas and I go to the restroom.

I walk into the bathroom, the furthest urinal in to the bathroom has a giant turd sitting in the urinal, and it can't be flushed because it's all caught up in a urinal cake

I'm shocked that someone could pull that off during our lunch rush... while it's nasty as hell, I kind of applaud him
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:11:40 AM EDT
IBTL
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:11:45 AM EDT
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:12:55 AM EDT
It was probably sitting there from the night before, and nobody wants to report it
for fear of being volunteered to take care of it.

Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:13:53 AM EDT
Nah, because the restrooms are sparkling from the cleaning crew in the morning
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:14:22 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/20/2005 10:15:03 AM EDT by Steve_T_M]
What kind of psychosis compels people to do this? I see it everywhere... sometimes they do it on the floor.
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:15:06 AM EDT


Thanks for sharing...
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:15:59 AM EDT
Could be a fake. I got an 8" one once and floated it in the tub when I bathed the kids. Then I called Mrs. Callgood in to "see what one of them had done."

Anyway, bend down and give it the sniff test to make sure.
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:16:05 AM EDT
You have any ex-Navy employees?
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:16:18 AM EDT
Ahhh...The Mad Crapper Strikes again!
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:16:31 AM EDT

Originally Posted By callgood:
Could be a fake. I got an 8" one once and floated it in the tub when I bathed the kids. Then I called Mrs. Callgood in to "see what one of them had done."

Anyway, bend down and give it the sniff TASTE test to make sure.

Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:17:17 AM EDT
Is Hokie's crew doing work in your neighborhood?
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:17:47 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/20/2005 10:18:26 AM EDT by w4klr]
Heh, just had one of the busboys clean that thing out... never seen a kid grab a turd with his hand before (gloved of course), first reaction was "This thing is warm"

HAHA DZL I remember that one! I'm gonna put some claymores in front of the urinals hehe
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:20:43 AM EDT
Gotta be a bomber pilot.
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:23:07 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/20/2005 10:23:33 AM EDT by geezhound]
Hey, maybe the crapper was occupied and this guy had an anxious jumper in the door.
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:28:24 AM EDT
Granted I've been known to leave some "monsters"
in the stalls for others to marvel but the urinal... Kudos to this dare devil
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:33:15 AM EDT
shit, i think i just pissed my pants.
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:34:16 AM EDT
The big white thing in the bottom of the urinal is NOT A BREATH MINT!
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:37:20 AM EDT
Was it a steamer?
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:44:48 AM EDT
You should've nuked it from orbit, just to be sure.
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:45:56 AM EDT
So I was in the restaurant during the lunch rush & had to go to the can. Damn both stalls were full so I backed up to the.....
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:46:27 AM EDT
was it stinky
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:48:02 AM EDT

Originally Posted By SouthHoof:
So I was in the restaurant during the lunch rush & had to go to the can. Damn both stalls were full so I backed up to the.....



I was waitin for it
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:48:32 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Steve_T_M:
What kind of psychosis compels people to do this? I see it everywhere... sometimes they do it on the floor.



We had someone at work decide to lighten his bowels in the middle of the bathrom floor, and then empty the hand soap dispenser and cover the pile with the liquid soap.

What's up with that?!
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 10:49:26 AM EDT
You know... sometimes when I have one touching cotton and the stalls are full, I just gotta go.
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 11:05:40 AM EDT
Maybe it was Al Gore vomiting that turd into the urinal?
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 11:12:02 AM EDT
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 11:17:42 AM EDT
Probably just a load from a diaper.
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 11:19:37 AM EDT
When babies drop loads the size of footballs, I'll let that one stay on the table
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 11:46:56 AM EDT
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 11:50:12 AM EDT
This almost could be judged as an upper decker. For those of you going WTF is an upper decker, that is where you drop a deuce in the fill tank of some poor bastards toilet.
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 11:54:43 AM EDT

Originally Posted By stevieh46360:
This almost could be judged as an upper decker. For those of you going WTF is an upper decker, that is where you drop a deuce in the fill tank of some poor bastards toilet.



Sounds like a plan to me
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 12:02:12 PM EDT
OT but related:

one night at my last club, we have a ladies' room problem. normally, i'd send the busser in, but he was so busy that i just couldn't spare him on the floor. in addition, i have a policy that i'll never ask an employee to do something that i wouldn't do myself, so i decided to take care of it.

well, in the last stall (and it is always the last stall) there is a pretty hefty floater, which won't flush due to the champagne glass stuck waaaaaaay down there. so suit coat off, sleeves rolled up, and wearing the dishwashing gloves that i keep for just such an occasion, i fish out the glass and assorted junk and get things working again.

now here's the funny part. as i'm relating this story in our GM/owner meeting, the mgr of our other location gives me a strange look. when i ask him why, he shows us his notes. #6 was...

"buy gloves."
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 12:07:28 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 12/20/2005 12:08:26 PM EDT by remedy]
One time I was at Crabby Bills down on St Petersburg beach, and it is not as nice a restaurant as their main spot. Anyway I was there with a bunch of friends and my girlfriend and we were all shithoused drunk, and I had to take a dump like mad so I go into the bathroom and I see this huge obese guy leaving one of the 3 stalls. The other two were occupied, so I cautiously opened the door to his stall to see if it stunk or was nasty. There was no stench but I looked in the toilet and I swear to god there was the largest turd I have ever seen. The thing was literally like a loaf of bread. It was 3-4 inches WIDE and about 6 inches long, and it couldn't be flushed. I was so disgusted and also amazed, that I just stumbled back out to my table and went back later to do what I had to do. I used a different stall. I told one of my buddies and he went in and came out with like a pale look on his face, he was shocked as well. We concluded it must be fake or something... there is no way a person's sphincter can accomodate something like that, it just couldnt be what it was.

- rem
Link Posted: 12/20/2005 12:10:29 PM EDT

Originally Posted By jcncc:
Gotta be a bomber pilot.



No fighter jock could hit the urinal.
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