Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: You should have put this in the religion forum. well except I am not religious.... To pre-empt any more religious talk, here is a good website on Christian sexuality that explains how to properly have a threesome within a Christian marriage, among other important things: Christian Sexuality, Pornography, Etc.

I'm sure that was written by a good christian, too.

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: You should have put this in the religion forum. well except I am not religious.... To pre-empt any more religious talk, here is a good website on Christian sexuality that explains how to properly have a threesome within a Christian marriage, among other important things: Christian Sexuality, Pornography, Etc. I'm sure that was written by a good christian, too.

At least they capitalized the name of the faith.  

Quoted: It’d be interesting to statistically analyze the infidelity/divorce rates for sexually adventurous couples versus sexually repressed, prudish couples. I’m inclined to believe the repression brings more harm.

absolutely, if a couple os happy in the bedroom and they are open there is no reason to stray

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: You should have put this in the religion forum. well except I am not religious.... To pre-empt any more religious talk, here is a good website on Christian sexuality that explains how to properly have a threesome within a Christian marriage, among other important things: Christian Sexuality, Pornography, Etc.

Gee, I always go to someone who is busy attempting to justify the evil that they wish to do, rather than paying attention and learning for myself.

I beleive that glk31 is trolling for responses on both side of this issue (hey, that is what everyone is doing, in the end) and is getting what he wanted.

Personally, I find female-female intercourse disgusting and degrading for both parties involved and this seems a good way to introduce yourself to Mr Divorce Attorney, or even worse, to Mr AIDS Treatment.  

Face it, if she is willing to sleep around with you watching, she will be sleeping around when you are out of town.  People who sleep around run the risk of contracting STD's.  Period.  You have just shown your wife that you can live with it if she sleeps around.

And face it, she may want you to take one of the 'team' and get into it with the husband . . .

Quoted: She knows that if that happens she is out and personally I don't think she will risk that but who knows, life goes on either way.

Wow, it sounds like you are one heck of a committed husband. Maybe that's why she's looking to get a little something extra from your buddy.

Quoted: It’d be interesting to statistically analyze the infidelity/divorce rates for sexually adventurous couples versus sexually repressed, prudish couples. I’m inclined to believe the repression brings more harm.

Given the context of the thread, I would guess that the infidelity rate among "sexually adventurous couples" is 100%.

Bad idea.

Quoted: Quoted: It’d be interesting to statistically analyze the infidelity/divorce rates for sexually adventurous couples versus sexually repressed, prudish couples. I’m inclined to believe the repression brings more harm. Given the context of the thread, I would guess that the infidelity rate among "sexually adventurous couples" is 100%.

I wouldn't call it infidelity if it is consensual by all parties.

Gee,  and I always thought the trick was to have a girlfriend that wants to do this sort of stuff...  that way the wife won't decide she can enjoy life better without you...  Now, your wife is the one with a girlfriend

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: You should have put this in the religion forum. well except I am not religious.... To pre-empt any more religious talk, here is a good website on Christian sexuality that explains how to properly have a threesome within a Christian marriage, among other important things: Christian Sexuality, Pornography, Etc. I'm sure that was written by a good christian, too. At least they capitalized the name of the faith.

I was telling my wife about my idea for a christian porn shop. After all, you  have christian rock, businesses, debt relief, and who knows what else any more. Just trying to iron out some marketing wrinkles...

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: It’d be interesting to statistically analyze the infidelity/divorce rates for sexually adventurous couples versus sexually repressed, prudish couples. I’m inclined to believe the repression brings more harm. Given the context of the thread, I would guess that the infidelity rate among "sexually adventurous couples" is 100%. I wouldn't call it infidelity if it is consensual by all parties.

Exactly.  Infidelity means sneaking around behind the other persons back.

Maybe I should have used 'unfaithfulness'.  Seems like a clumsy word though.

Personally, I wouldn't want another man in my bedroom and my wife wouldn't allow another woman - and that's fine with me.  To each his own, I guess - I'm not going to judge you.

I do have a true story to share (names changed).  My wife had two close friends in high school, Mary and Rene.  They aren't real close now, but she hears from Mary maybe once a year.  Mary is married to Bob.  Rene, who grew up in a nice home, now lives in the less favorable parts of town and has had 3 babies with different daddies.

A couple years ago, Mary told my wife that she and Bob were separated.  What happened?  Well, Mary and Bob thought it would be fun to let Rene join them in the bedroom.  I think it happened several times.  One day, Mary comes home and finds Bob and Rene having a good time without her.  I think the rules were clear - maybe they weren't.  Anyway, Mary and Bob are back together now.

I can't help but think (my opinion)...  when the spouse wants a little something extra "with you watching"... a lot of times they're really just wanting the something extra.  Once they get use to the idea of it's okay with mess around with that person, they are more likely to do it when you're not around.  Not saying this is going to happen to you...

CR

 There is something about this story. Here is what I see in it. The females involved knew this was going to happen even if the guys didn't, but I would guess GLK31 was the only one not in the know here. Do the girls usually ride in the back seat together. When the female was giving GLK31 the "Go" sign that was the test. If he had gone for it, it would have been on all four ways. If not that time, maybe next time. My guess is the other couple are experienced swingers whether GLK31 knows it or not. They are just breaking him in. This does not bode well for married people.

Quoted:  There is something about this story. Here is what I see in it. The females involved knew this was going to happen even if the guys didn't, but I would guess GLK31 was the only one not in the know here. Do the girls usually ride in the back seat together. When the female was giving GLK31 the "Go" sign that was the test. If he had gone for it, it would have been on all four ways. If not that time, maybe next time. My guess is the other couple are experienced swingers whether GLK31 knows it or not. They are just breaking him in. This does not bode well for married people.

actually my wife and I had been talking about this for some time.  If anything it caught by buddy off guard which I could tell by the look on his face.  The other lady involved had never done this and revealed that night that she had always wanted to try it but never had the nerve.

Quoted: you are what's wrong with this world.

+1
Dance with the one ya brung.
Til death do you part and all that.

Got no problem doing this as a bachelor - once your married, everything changes.
Just you and her for eternity.

PLUS ONE ,
DOC308

Quoted: Quoted: I wouldn't call it infidelity if it is consensual by all parties. Exactly.  Infidelity means sneaking around behind the other persons back. Maybe I should have used 'unfaithfulness'.  Seems like a clumsy word though.

Uh, infidelity is sexual unfaithfulness, making unfaithfulness a "superset" of infidelity, so I fail to see how that would help.  How about not redefining existing English words to suit your desires.

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: I wouldn't call it infidelity if it is consensual by all parties. Exactly.  Infidelity means sneaking around behind the other persons back. Maybe I should have used 'unfaithfulness'.  Seems like a clumsy word though. Uh, infidelity is sexual unfaithfulness, making unfaithfulness a "superset" of infidelity, so I fail to see how that would help.  How about not redefining existing English words to suit your desires.

Well, I'm not sure if unfaithfulness would apply if the husband knew and liked it.  Unfaithful sounds more like when trust is being broken.  In this case he knows full well and likes it so it doesn't sound like trust was broken.
I wasn't trying to redefine anything though I was trying to get a word that conveyed what I meant.
Sorry if it was awkward or unclear but I'm getting at the difference between a wife who fools around with another woman right there in front of her husband with him being aware of and supportive of the situation versus a wife who pretends to be interested with only her husband but really she sneaks out when she's supposedly "over at a friends" and fucks strange men from the bar.

Whatever terms you want...I didn't mean to redefine anything.  The main thing is you understood what I meant and hopefully this clears it up.

glk31  Maybe I am sound overly cautious here, but I don't really think this is an appropriate place to discuss this.  I am not a prude or anything... this just isn't the place.  And if there were any further problems, perhaps ending up in court, this thread might come back to haunt you.  

My advise would be to ask one of the mods to delete the thread asap.

I am a very open minded person, and Im not gonna pass judgement on you, no matter what I think about this situation.   But I'll just say this, everything has a price.  If you think it doesn't, you just havent found out what the price is gonna be yet.  You will have to pay something for the fun you're having.  Just hope that it isnt more than you're willing to pay.  Keep that in mind.

Quoted: In Before The Failed Marriage!

+100
I live in a small southern town with a religious heritage.
Yet, I know of this happening more than once.

Man begs wife/ girlfriend repeatedly to have sex with another woman.
She does while he watches.
Great, right?

Soon she's packing her bags.
Why?
Turns out she likes sex with another woman, and doesn't have to put up with some sloppy jerk pressuring her to do things she doesn't want to do.

It's like asking your wife to sleep with another man.
You are really playing with fire, so don't act shocked when you end up in the burn unit, on life support.  

(from dictionary.com)
in·fi·del·i·ty  
Unfaithfulness to a sexual partner, especially a spouse.

un·faith·ful    
Not adhering to promises, obligations, or allegiances; disloyal.
Not true or constant to one's sexual partner.

So.... in that context, I guess whether or not she was unfaithful would depend on your marriage vows.
Mine said "Forsaking all others."

After being in a marriage where she didn't want to be faithful, I'm really thrilled to be with someone who honors those vows.

Hey, I'm not judging you.
By posting this thread, you are asking for opinions.
Looks like you are getting plenty.
Bottom line, you have to live in your life, with your wife. I don't.
If you're happy, then I'm happy for you.

Quoted: Paragraphs are your friend

really.


TXL

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Paragraphs are your friend Here we go...... What?  You are not going to post pics I can whack to, so I am going to critique your grammar.

No, it's a function of effective communication.  He wants us to understand what he said.  Paragraphs would make that process easier.

TXL

Quoted: Anyway thought I would share my experience and welcome feedback as I am sure this will get a few response.

Decide how you are going to divide your stuff now.  

As I told one girl when she asked what I thought about a threesome (2 girls 1 guy).  I said I didn't have a problem with it but I wouldn't marry a girl I did a threesome with.

Dude, you just pimped your wife!    

The price;   self-gratification.

Quoted: Quoted: Ok, so your wife and another chick got it on while you and the other guy did what exactly??? I played with mine, he with his (wife that is, don't get the wrong idea)

Well speaking from experience this situation can be good or bad. It all depends upon the people. If GLK31 and his wife are both honest with each other and DON'T go behind each others backs then there is nothing to worry about. For instance if GLK31 or his wife doesn't hide or lie about money situations. "Gee wiz did you know that when an AR and an AK get together in the gun safe they have M1A's... How'd that get in there?!?!"

If either of them is dishonest then this will just MAGNIFY the dishonesty in the long run. If they are honest and commited to thier relationship then this will just MAGNIFY that.

Finding single women open to a threesome is difficult. Forget looking on the swinger and adult sites. They are usually guys pretending to be chicks and are a no show. If your wife is way better looking than you it makes it difficult as well. The single chicks who do threesomes have to have something in it for them they don't react well to simply being there to fulfill YOUR fantasies but HERS. Best place is to just pick them up at a bar with your wife and make sure you let HER pick out the chick.

If the other chick is really into you (the guy) she can make all sorts of problems. Best is if it is a one night thing or a chick who doesn't want a relationship. If she starts making moves and tries to get you alone from the wife drop her and imediately tell the wife. This reinforces your wifes trust in you and you don't feel like shit and ruin the marriage by going behind her back. Then you look for a new chick. Also if you get it on in a real 3some not another couple situation. DON'T let loose in the other chick, this WILL make your spouse jelious. Make sure you split the time and attention 70/30 in your wifes favor. As long as she feels she is gettnig more attention she should be fine.

If you are both very honest and very upfront with the sex and only play together you should do fine. You WILL have to talk more, and not just how hot you think it is make sure you LISTEN to her. This type of thing will only MAGNIFY your relationship dynamics. If your marriage is shaky it WILL ruin it. If it is strong with EXCELLENT communication and trust it WILL enhance it. Be prepared to discuss and modify your rules as time goes by and BTW your wife has final say. Also once you let the genie out of the bottle you can't put it back..... She could change in some unexpected ways (not negative just change) and you should be prepared for that as well.

IM me if you want to know more...

and I havn't heard it yet This thread is worthless without PICS

your life is so f*cked up and you don't even know it yet.

sorry for your (future) lose...maybe the next woman in your life will have higher standards.

I don't know if I could handle a three/foursome with my wife (if I had one).  A girlfriend definately, but wife is iff?  

If you can more power to ya.

the self righteous moralism on this site never ceases ot amaze me.

Quoted: the self righteous moralism on this site never ceases ot amaze me.

I'd have to agree with ya on that one sometimes, but in this case the statistics say this marriage has a piss poor chance of survival.  

Quoted: Quoted: the self righteous moralism on this site never ceases ot amaze me. I'd have to agree with ya on that one sometimes, but in this case the statistics say this marriage has a piss poor chance of survival.

Most marriages do.

You may start poking everything you can. Have a GREAT time but your marrige is done.

 

Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: the self righteous moralism on this site never ceases ot amaze me. I'd have to agree with ya on that one sometimes, but in this case the statistics say this marriage has a piss poor chance of survival.   Most marriages do.

The last I heard, the chance of a marriage lasting a lifetime are less than 50%.  Add this kind of activity and the chance drops to a fraction of that.

Is it possible that this marriage will withstand this...yes.  Is it probable...no.

This kind of shit has been going on longer than you or I have been on the planet (and I'm an old phart) and those odds just keep getting worse.

It's not my purpose to pass judgement on this activity, only to point out that the odds of a successful marriage are slim to none after the fact.