Warning

 

Close

Confirm Action

Are you sure you wish to do this?

Confirm Cancel
Member Login
Site Notices
Posted: 7/1/2001 5:00:53 AM EDT
Fine: This is the word we use at the end of any argument that we feel we are right about but need to shut you up. NEVER use fine to describe how woman looks. This will cause you to have one of those arguments. Five minutes: This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so I feel that it's an even trade. Nothing: This means something and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with the word "Fine". Go Ahead (with raised eyebrows): This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine". Go Ahead (normal eyebrows): This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care". You will get a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by "Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when she cools off. Loud Sigh: This is not actually a word, but is still often a verbal statement very misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at that moment and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing". Soft Sigh: Again, not a word, but a verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" are one of the few things that some men actually understand. She is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe and she will stay content. Oh: This word followed by any statement is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night". If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least 2 days. "Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get raised eyebrows "Go ahead" followed by acts so unspeakable that I can't bring myself to write about them. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can say to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before paying you retributions for what ever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is often used with the word "Fine" and used in conjunction with a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead". At some point in the near future when she has plotted and planned, you are going to be in some mighty big trouble. Please Do: This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is that you have done. You have a fair chance to tell the truth, so be careful and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay". Thanks: A woman is thanking you. Do not faint, just say you're welcome. Thanks A Lot: This is much different than "Thanks". A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have hurt her in some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh". Be careful not to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh", as she will only tell you "Nothing".
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 5:04:46 AM EDT
The sad thing is I can't really disagree with these. You just have to remember we are much more emotional.
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 5:07:05 AM EDT
"SWEET" MEANS "BI-SEXUAL"!!!!!!!! If you hear 2 women bantering back and forth, and they use the word "sweet" an unusual amount of times, they are trying to communicate to each other that they lick clam. Example: "Hey...Did you see that movie? Brad Pitt is in it. He is soooo Sweet" "Yeah. I saw it. I'm not a fan of his, but did you see Travolta in that new flick! Now [i]THAT[/i] was sweet!" "OH, JOHN TRAVOLTA! He has the sweetest face!" Anything like that means they are Bi-Sexual. Pay attention. It is a code I recently cracked.
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 6:05:09 AM EDT
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 6:21:40 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 7/1/2001 6:30:33 AM EDT by 5subslr5]
My recent divorce may be a strong "indicator" I didn't understand !! I have learned a couple of things worth sharing: 1) When the "ex" calls to check on things you the ex-husband cannot be "happy" !! 2) Also you cannot be "content." Content may be worse than happy. I'm pretty sure but not positive you can't be neutral because neutral could be construed as either happy or content. I am positive neither happy nor content is permissible. A couple of months ago I knida/sorta indicated I was happy. Within (48) hours I was threatened with another court action ! After adopting a position of "mild unhappiness" the threat disappeared. Now when the ex-wife calls and asks how I'm doing I simply begin to ask questions about how is she doing. Thus far, works every time !
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 6:30:36 AM EDT
And for married women: We = You As in, "we need to paint the house, take out the trash, palnt a garden, etc, etc."
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 6:36:05 AM EDT
My wife has a saying, "what's mines is mines, what's yours is mine."
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 6:36:39 AM EDT
Very good point, raf. Some men are just as emotional and prone to outbursts as women. I also think that the rage that men used as a survival tool centuries ago now just gets them into trouble.
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 6:45:09 AM EDT
Happiness is a deaf mute.... if I could only find one to marry?
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 6:51:27 AM EDT
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 8:19:00 AM EDT
You just have to remember we are much more emotional.
View Quote
Like a roller coaster. First marriage: I argued my position. Rocky road for 11 years. Current marriage: I say, "Yes, Dear" a lot and nod my head whenever it seems appropriate. 13 years with very few arguments. Of course, the first wife was all boobs and no brains. Never thought I could learn so much from someone as dumb as a box of rocks. Eddie
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 8:21:26 AM EDT
IMHO, being drunk=being out of control=a window on the individual's inner attitudes.
View Quote
I think Edgar Rice Burroughs had it right when he said, "Alcohol strips away the thin veneer we call civilization and reveals the real man." Eddie
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 8:27:16 AM EDT
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 8:34:33 AM EDT
Originally Posted By raf: IMHO, being drunk=being out of control=a window on the individual's inner attitudes.
View Quote
Very perceptive. I like watching prospective dates when they are drunk to see how they behave. If they act like a slut or a bitch, then they really are going to be a slut or a bitch when they get 'confortable' with you. If they act cool but drunk and they aren't trying to get screwed anything that moves, then they are probably going to be ok to date. I'm very picky...
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 9:22:11 AM EDT
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 10:00:14 AM EDT
The biggest communication problem I had with a particular woman is that she never said what she wanted or wanted to hear, and got really upset when I didn't say what she wanted to hear. I'm so used to straightforward, open, and direct communication. With this one person it was like walking on eggshells, never knowing how I was going to piss her off by being obtuse or insensitive. Not a lot of fun.
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 10:30:43 AM EDT
Originally Posted By raven: The biggest communication problem I had with a particular woman is that she never said what she wanted or wanted to hear, and got really upset when I didn't say what she wanted to hear. I'm so used to straightforward, open, and direct communication. With this one person it was like walking on eggshells, never knowing how I was going to piss her off by being obtuse or insensitive. Not a lot of fun.
View Quote
Been there, tried that, got the free hat. At this point, I moved on to the realm of [i]Free College Lovin'[/i]. That was fun, but soon grew weary of. Now I'm back at Square-1 and have to face the tribulations of reality once again. Luckily, I've got two in my sights now that are neither whores nor intellectual rejects. It's been so long though, now I have to remember how you DATE. Do people still do that, or am I behidn the times? [img]www.auburn.edu/~littlcb/E-vil2.jpg[/img]
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 10:46:36 AM EDT
My favorite is "I [b]need[/b] this..." When in actuallity they don't need it at all. Just want it really bad. Just like little fawk'n kids.
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 11:57:46 AM EDT
Originally Posted By raf: To Jennifer: Are women in general more emotional than men in general, or men been conditioned to control their emotions better?
View Quote
Speaking as a man, we have emotions but we get emotional over different things. For example, I still get weepy when John Wayne gets killed in the end of "The Sands of Iwo Jima." Women are overly emotional and seem to take everything as an insult. For example, if my wife says, "God, you're fat!" I'll pat my gut with pride and say, "Yep!" However, if I say, "that dress doesn't look nice on you" to my wife, she's cries, "You think that I'm fat!" and won't speak to me for hours.
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 11:59:39 AM EDT
Took me several years of married life to crack the code. Still get a suprise sometimes. OlDad
Link Posted: 7/1/2001 6:39:06 PM EDT
Then there's a whole different language for the kids. Get in the bathroom for your bat really means, Legt's go see what the cat's doing. Brush your teeth really means, Run and hide. Time for bed means, Did we pet the cat yet? Let's go see where it's at. Get dressed or find your shoes really means, let's go see if Barney's on yet. you get the picture.... [;)]
Link Posted: 7/2/2001 7:09:59 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 7/2/2001 8:07:29 AM EDT by Halfcocked]
ya, and women don't like liars and they can't take honesty. An example. Wife, "Honey, do these pants make me look fat?" Me, "Why no dear." Wife, "YOU DIDN'T EVEN LOOK! YOU'RE JUST SAYING THAT!" Wife, "Do these pants make me look fat?" Me, "Why no dear. It's not the pants that are making you look fat. It's all that pizza and cheese cake."
Top Top