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Posted: 6/18/2001 11:28:43 PM EDT
Both my wife and I were born and raised in California, but things here are getting really bad. I don't mean just the gun laws but the overall mentality of this state. Things like the public schools, open homosexuality, and many other issues that are very different than what we believe in. face it, this state is sess pool of liberal immorallity! Anyway, I desperately want to move out to someplace like Texas, Arizona, or maybe Colarado. The wife doesn't, mainly because she has her family here, mostly her mother whom she is very close to and is quite old. Now I respect her for that as my family is here also...but I want out!! I would prefer to live in a relatively small town (40-50K people) that is close to forest and wide open spaces. She prefers the city life and wants Hospitals, stores and other things like that. So what can I do to help her see my view point? We are a team concerning major decesions and I want her to agree with the idea, but I need help convincing her. Anyone have any ideas? Because I really can't stand this state anymore...and leaving her is [b]not[/b] an option. Anyone[?][?] sgtar15
Link Posted: 6/18/2001 11:31:01 PM EDT
take her out of state rent some really cool gun have her shoot it and say g honey to bad we cant get one in Kalifornia
Link Posted: 6/18/2001 11:45:29 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 6/18/2001 11:45:13 PM EDT by Stealth]
Originally Posted By sgtar15: The wife doesn't, mainly because she has her family here, mostly her mother whom she is very close to and is quite old. ... She prefers the city life and wants Hospitals, stores and other things like that. ... So what can I do to help her see my view point? We are a team concerning major decisions and I want her to agree with the idea, but I need help convincing her
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You may be able to convice her to leave, but it also sounds like she would regret it. Even if she does see your point of view (which she probably does). I feel for ya guy, but it sounds like you may be stuck.
Link Posted: 6/18/2001 11:55:39 PM EDT
Oh, you're gonna love this! It's so simple, as plain as the nose on your face! . . . . . . . . Bring your Mother In Law along on the move.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 12:05:37 AM EDT
She has the nerve to want hospitals and stores? That bitch, divorce her. Hospitals and stores...next thing you know, she'll be wanting running water and electricty. Women, geez. Um, btw, I'm just kidding. It's past my bedtime.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 12:06:02 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 6/19/2001 12:04:53 AM EDT by Ratters]
I'm in the same boat. Would love to move to AZ, but wife likes it here. And I must admit that I really like the house we own and our neighborhood and the fact that all my friends and family are here as well. Publik schools don't matter to me as we don't/aren't doing the kid thing, and they would be homeschooled if we did, and I work with and have a few gay friends so that stuff doesn't bother me. For me it is mostly the gun laws and general lack of freedom here. Ever notice in catalogues there is always the sign saying they can't ship to california all the cool stuff. Plus I wan't an honest to goodness real HK91. Oh, and the freaken taxes here, not just state but they stick it to you any way the can. And the 3 dollar tolls we are going to have soon to cross a bridge. Oy. So, we are going to stick it out for a while and eventually buy a house in Nevada, around Carson city or Reno. You can still find pretty cheap housing there. We will probably keep both houses and just go back and forth between them as it is only a little over three hours difference. When we are ready to seriously move on we will buy a farm or house with land in Nevada and live there permanently. You might want to try to push the Tahoe/Carson Nevada thing as she will only be a couple hours away from family.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 12:26:20 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Ratters: You might want to try to push the Tahoe/Carson Nevada thing as she will only be a couple hours away from family.
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That I think is probably my best chance. I would never even think about taking her away from her mother at this stage, as she is quite feable/ill and needs support. I can actually honestly say that I would not mind her living with us, but that would never happen. We already home school our kids, but there's other crap going on also. I am willing to wait till after her mother passes away and just plan to work on the wife till that time comes. I don't mean that to sound cold. My wife lost her father at a young age and I could take her away from her mother during the last years of her life. sgtar15
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 1:06:41 AM EDT
My wife is very close to her family, and enjoys her job and the kids she works with. I am in the same boat. I have lived in the same CA city my whole life, but travelled the world. I was born to travel. I'm trying to show her the things I see going on, that she doesn't. I'm going on vacation in 3 weeks. I'm taking her out of The Bannana Republic to see how other people live. Going to Indiana and back. We both know I want to leave more than she does, but I'm hoping she sees something on the trip that changes her outlook. Best of luck to you. My wife keeps my household together, but she feels bad because she knows I want to leave this state but I'm staying because I want her to be happy. I told her that we'll stay, but not too long. I'm going to ask her, "What would happen if I got offered a job while we were gone?" Her response might change once we were on the road checking things out. If you can't change here mind, buy some cheap land (Reno, Vegas, AZ, which ever is closer) build a garage there, put a safe in it, set up residence, keep your non Kalifornia toys there.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 1:09:23 AM EDT
We love the scenery in CA, but I agree with you, everywhere you go it's homosexuals and liberal "tree hugging pansies". I don't like the attitude of CA.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 1:19:38 AM EDT
Originally Posted By frpcmanager: If you can't change here mind, buy some cheap land (Reno, Vegas, AZ, which ever is closer) build a garage there, put a safe in it, set up residence, keep your non Kalifornia toys there.
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That was another option I have seriously thought about. Maybe buying a few acres in Nevada or Arizona and putting a small trailer home or basic cabin on the property. It could be done relatively cheaply and also be used as a vacation type home. But like I said, it not just the gun issue anymore...it's everything!! My wife does feel the same way that California sucks, but it's the family that keeps her here. sgtar15
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 1:21:46 AM EDT
I went up to Reno a few times last year (and this year) looking at homes and it is a hell of a lot more affordable up there. It's amazing. But, at least for me, I didn't see very much in the way of jobs. It looks like service jobs are big but not much in the way of engineering.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 7:00:26 AM EDT
I am in the same boat also.. my wife LOVES CA and think that the world ENDS that the eastern CA border. She is always clinging to some excuse to stay in CA. (1.) Schools (for our kid) I point out that CA is ranked number 49 in the nation for public schools...and it doesn't register..she just moves on to the next excuse.. (2.) Jobs...I point out that Austin and Atlanta have a growing economy..lots of jobs. etc.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 7:08:15 AM EDT
sgtar15, take your family on a vacation to the Grand Canyon. Spend a day in Flagstaff, AZ.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 7:10:53 AM EDT
Sigh... If it makes anyone feel any better, I'm in the same boat with the rest of you guys for pretty much all the above reasons. And like sgtar15 said divorce is not an option.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 7:21:18 AM EDT
Sgtar15 have you looked into Vegas, Henderson or Phrump (sp). Yea it has grown huge, but you can own what you want, go shooting without having someone looking over your shoulder. As for your wife's mom, they probably have one of the greatest retirement areas in the western states. It has everything for shopping and entertainment, and best of all they have (last I heard) no state income tax.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 7:21:20 AM EDT
Same here, I want out of new york soo bad but.......I gave up trying to convince my wife to move after her two sisters had kids recently, now forget it, she will never move. Hopefully in the near future I will be able to afford an "away place", maybe AZ.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 7:23:24 AM EDT
Geez guys, you sure know how to make one feel bad. Here I am looking at my new shipment of AR-15 mags I got yesterday and getting ready to place a order for 8 more.And you guys can't even get them shipped to PRK.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 7:28:07 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 6/19/2001 7:26:06 AM EDT by Jewbroni]
Originally Posted By Different: sgtar15, take your family on a vacation to the Grand Canyon. Spend a day in Flagstaff, AZ.
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Agreed. This situation still falls under the category of [i]compromise[/i]. You want the rural life in TX, she wants the urban one of Cali. This is where you strike up a bargain, but don't let your original offer down just yet. Conveniently make suggestions that a move east (TX is a good choice) would be in your favor. At this point, it's still doubtful that she'll buckle. So sit her down, tell her you respect her point of view, and [i]agree[/i] (almost as in a deamenor of you regretting it) to settle somewhere in an AZ suburbia, close to the family and conveniently allowing access to both of your preferable atmospheres. After all of your persistent efforts, plus a bargain of compromise, she will hopefully see where you're coming from, and agree to the terms of moving as well. If she says no after all of your efforts, then she really is stubbornly attached to her mother, and you will most likely just wait until she leaves this world (the in-law, not the wife [}:D]). Wear her down, then act life you're letting her win - it's worked for me before on more than a few occasions. [brown]Evil Jewbroni~[/brown]
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 7:52:11 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 6/19/2001 8:03:40 AM EDT by Waldo]
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 7:57:50 AM EDT
Somewhere in the Bible, Trent Lott's wife turned into a pillar of salt when they were fleeing California and she turned back. Rumor had it the he was fleeing to a smaller town with a less powerful/corrupt govt because Sodom had just banned bows made of wood which burned at less than 600F, or which could accept a quiver holding more than 4 arrows, banned possession of flint tipped arrows, and prohibited lashing a knife to your bow. Word is the SPD is still looking for two suspects for failure to carry ID, resisting arrest, not giving consent to a warrantless search, possession of some undescribed illegal weapon - possibly Pepper spray or OC gas - capable of blinding an entire crowd, and assaulting numerous townsfolk. A Hate crime investigation is underway. All charges of unruly conduct and misdemeanor assault against the peaceful townsfolk have been dropped.
Link Posted: 6/19/2001 9:01:33 AM EDT
That was a good analogy. My wife knows I'm trying to drag her to the dark side, but she sees I'm not doing it in an agressive way. If I baby up to her, and give her little glimpses of life away from here, hopefully it will work. She always comes back to family (church and birth) and what we've known. "It's time to get to know something new and see what we can be somewhere else. Let's try it, if it doesn't work out, we can always come back." Tell her things like that, and when you get where you want to be, grab on and cling to it for dear life! "Honey we can't move, I just bolted the new safe to the floor and put in my new reloading bench, I think I might be getting a promotion soon,I heard Kalifornia was infested by fruit flies, locusts, killer bees, anything, JUST DON'T MAKE ME LEAVE MY FREEDOM!" Yeah that'll work, just tell her that.
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