Posted: 12/15/2004 9:50:11 AM EDT
The guys in the nosebleed section heard this one, I'm sure. Maybe they heard this one too... 
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LOL, time for a war story. Played highschool football. I was a big kid and worked out. The equipment, well, sort of high school grade substandard. Anyway, on a kickoff, I lasered down the field as fast as I could run. The returning team ran a reverse, with the guy getting the handoff right as I arrived. I leveled him. It knocked both of us out. Apparently, my coach ran over and stuck smelling salts under my nose to revive me. My instinctual reaction, which I still cannot recall, was to swing with my fist in a roundhouse punch. Yup, I rung my Coach's bell pretty good. Every monday, coach DiPaulla assigned "laps" for various issues with last Friday's game. You'd get laps if you missed a block, or threw an interception, or dropped a handoff. He assigned all the laps, then he pushed play on the video and noted he had one more set of laps: "Look here at Gonzo, lying on his back knocked the fuck out..." he says. "Now look at me trying to help this kid. SMACK! Did you see him hit me!? Look at my head rock back." "Gonzo, just keep running until I tell you to stop." LOL! |
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I was playing softball, pitching and this gal hits a pretty hot grounder past the shortstop. She's digging for second and slides..I hear her ankle pop as he foot dug in...she slides in towards the base, and the shortstop gets the throw.. She is already starting to scream as she puts her obviously broken ankle up in the air... The tag from the shortstop; Hits the foot with the broken ankle and spins it around! I was backing up the throw. I puked, the shortstop puked, the girl passed smooth out...thank Christ, and the ump had to take a knee. I'll never forget that. |
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Back when I was playing football, I had a coach that was kind of a dumbass. We didn't have a running game, so his great plan was to run reverses to the Wideouts to get some rushing yardage. So at least 2 or 3 times a quarter we'd run a reverse. Now, since a reverse is a TRICK play, it doesn't work too well to run it often. So we, in one season, lost 2 wideouts running them, and should've lost me a few more times - I played through some stuff I really shouldn't have. Needless to say, I got my bell rung pretty hard a few times. The coach would come out and ask you three questions when you were down. 1) What is your name? 2) What is my name? 3) What position do you play? On at least 3 occasions, I failed to answer either 1 or 2, but got sent back into the game because I got #3 right. I'm told (HELL, I don't remember any of this shit, it was all told to me after the fact...) that I once failed all three questions, and got sent back in. The QB used to tell stories of calling a play, and then pulling me over to tell me what I was doing - 'cause I couldn't remember. That coach was an ass. |