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Posted: 9/27/2004 4:28:16 PM EDT
[#1]
Wave has it so far.
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Posted: 9/27/2004 4:33:02 PM EDT
[#2]
I don't WANT to talk to people I don't already know - I've got enough friends, and I've got a fiancee, and I don't really like people.
I met my fiancee when she came to a research presentation of mine in Cincinatti at a conference years ago, so she come up to me. Thank God she was attracted to me for my mind - because otherwise I would have been screwed! 
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Posted: 9/27/2004 4:35:56 PM EDT
[#3]
are you ladies models?
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Posted: 9/27/2004 4:36:13 PM EDT
[#4]
Dude thats not a prostitute, It's Wave, he's a vice cop.  |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 4:44:52 PM EDT
[#5]
hahhaha.... ive only heard that from one guy before and though he invented the term |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 4:46:18 PM EDT
[#6]
Why in the hell would I want to introduce myself to women? SHEESH!!
 AB |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 4:49:16 PM EDT
[#7]
Oath of celibacy perhaps? |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 4:57:33 PM EDT
[#8]
Hey baby lets see your OHHHHHHHHHHHHH face
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Posted: 9/27/2004 5:11:41 PM EDT
[#9]
Yur way prettier than the last THREE blow up dolls I've had
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Posted: 9/27/2004 5:22:56 PM EDT
[#10]
Its a celebration bitches, enjoy yourself!
"Hey, whats up. My names Drew5337. Whatcha drinking? Buy you another?" That one works every time. The trick is to only use that line during power hour (free or stupidly cheap drinks). |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 5:31:10 PM EDT
[#11]
"Would you like some candy, Little Girl?" |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:14:10 PM EDT
[#12]
Hi I am Kent and this is my beautiful wife Julianne!
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:19:48 PM EDT
[#13]
Friggin' married. Ab |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:24:09 PM EDT
[#14]
From my best friend....
"Nice shoes......... .......wanna fuck?"
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:25:39 PM EDT
[#15]
let's play carpinter........
first we get hammered......... then i nail you....................... saw it on a t-shirt
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:26:17 PM EDT
[#16]
I have used chimborazo's second line - successfully - back in my wilder days, which I am now paying for.
This one always worked - "Hi, I'm AeroE, and I have to tell you that I think you are very attractive." This line is good for at least two dates, some of which last for 3 days. 
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:26:30 PM EDT
[#17]
Ever ride a horse young lady?
Care to see what it would feel like to let it ride you. |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:29:49 PM EDT
[#18]
"Quick, give my 5 reasons why you think you are good enough to go on a date with me."
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:34:05 PM EDT
[#19]
"You sure have a pretty smile".
"You have lovely eyes" panty removers. |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:37:13 PM EDT
[#20]
first thing, i slide up to the bar, and tell her that i can't believe how fucking fat she is.
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:40:02 PM EDT
[#21]
turn around and out your hands behind your back...
or Hey, can you help me look for my little puppy... I think he wondered into this cheap motel down street. |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:42:19 PM EDT
[#22]
Just whip it out.
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:54:27 PM EDT
[#23]
"Hi, I'm straight but may as well be a eunuch, I'm so frigging married. Feel free to torture me with tales of how attractive you find me, since you know damn-well I won't do a damned thing about it." I've been flirted with (twice flat-out propositioned) waaaayyy more in the past 12 years that I've been married and slowly drifting out of shape than when I was single and studly. Must be the male pattern baldness.
That's right, ladies - I don't need to shave it. It's allllll natural.... |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 7:59:19 PM EDT
[#24]
Plus I am Catholic.
Catholics have big penises.  
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Posted: 9/27/2004 8:20:57 PM EDT
[#25]
Nice shoes, want to fuck ?
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Posted: 9/27/2004 8:32:54 PM EDT
[#26]
you know, the last girl i got a number from, without knowing her prior to that date, went something like this.
Me and and a long time friend were eating breakfast, when two beautiful women came in the front door. Being the guy that i am, i noticed them and pointed them out to my friend. We ate breakfast, and as soon as i got out the door, i turned to look back in the window (they were in stools facing the street), i saw them looking at us. I winked at the one girl, and she blushed, and laughed. So i went back in and said that i hadn't seen any girls as beautiful as you two in a long time, and i would hate myself if i just kept walking. Long story short, we made small talk, and i got her number. Then i went to work. Next day i called her, and she didn't answer. Never did her from her. So i guess it was all for nothing. Moral of the story: Be original ------- It worked for me! (kinda)
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Posted: 9/27/2004 8:45:32 PM EDT
[#27]
'Hi' Of course, the fact that I don't want much else generally helps with that... |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:09:54 PM EDT
[#28]
roger that |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:16:07 PM EDT
[#29]
That reminds me of Dumb and Dumber. "Nice skis, they yours? Woman: "Yes." "Both of them?" |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:17:25 PM EDT
[#30]
Can you point me toward some of them? My mutiple tactics never work, any good ideas? I knew one girl who was complaining about having bad relationships, I told here I was avaiable. She siad Im not her type so in my smartass response I let her know I didnt want a relationship, I wanted to fuck her. She doesnt talk to me anymore |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:20:48 PM EDT
[#31]
"On your knees, woman!"
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:21:26 PM EDT
[#32]
"I have more thrust per squeeze"
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:23:12 PM EDT
[#33]
Hiya, Gorgeous, where ya been all my life.
I've only had one woman not smile and she was a feminazi 7-11 clerk. "I'm not gorgeous!" "I know, you're really as ugly as a mud fence, but I didn't want to embarrass you in front of all these nice peope." Another time, a teenager answered it with this: 'I been here waiting for you! Where the hell have you been, anyway?" Women of ALL ages seem to be really amused by that line. |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:23:30 PM EDT
[#34]
+1 |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:24:33 PM EDT
[#35]
nice shoes, wanna fuck
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:32:25 PM EDT
[#36]
ME: Watch where you're going you dumb broad!
HER: (FINGER) |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 9:56:22 PM EDT
[#37]
It usually goes something like this....
Me: hi, my name is mike and I hang below my boxers Her: can you be at my place in 10 minutes? |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 11:37:57 PM EDT
[#38]
My opening line is never the same , it depends on where and when it is .
What I do know is that the more you do it , the easier it gets . I was totally lost after being married for almost 20 years . At first I was lucky if I got 1 in 10 into a conversation , and about 1 in 20 for a date /phone number . Now five years later . After honing my skills its more like 1 in 2 for conversation and 1 - 4 for a date/phone number . Looks are only about 20% of it ( Believe Me ) .... Projecting confidence is the Key  |
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Posted: 9/27/2004 11:39:38 PM EDT
[#39]
"Hesh wants sex!"
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Posted: 9/27/2004 11:40:43 PM EDT
[#40]
Considering this I mut be running at 5%+/- a few points |
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Posted: 9/28/2004 12:17:47 AM EDT
[#41]
Doesn't matter ..... Like Lotto , Ya gotta be in it to win it . If you don't see a ring its fair game . Bars/clubs are one of the worst places to meet women , unless you prefer competing for drunk bar sluts Now don't laugh but one of the best places is wal mart , Kmart , etc on a Saturday night around midnight .Followed closely by laundry mats at the same time of night . Third being grocery stores . Hell , last week I met a woman at a Hess station while getting gas . We ended up going for coffee and have a date this Friday . |
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Posted: 9/28/2004 12:28:49 AM EDT
[#42]
From a friend:
Him: Hey, wanna go back to my place, eat doritos, and fuck? Her: rejection in some form.. Him: What, you don't like doritos? he claims it worked once, and he's odd enough he's probably tried that routine fairly oftend. I generally start with "hi" and go from there based on, well, her. |
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Posted: 9/28/2004 12:55:34 AM EDT
[#43]
"Hi, my name is Ron Jeremy." "You want a job?"
So far it hasn't worked. They all know what Ron Jeremy looks like or have worked with him. Ron Jeremy aka Colt_SBR |
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Posted: 9/28/2004 12:57:10 AM EDT
[#44]
Somethimes humor will get you what you desire…of course sometimes it will get you a slap across the face.
 Me, walks up to girl in a club I'd been whatching…"hi, do you want to dance?" Girl…"no!" Me…"I suppose a shag is totally out of the question then?" Girls bursts out laughing…"come on then, let's dance" I had a good night…  Andy |
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Posted: 9/28/2004 1:21:12 AM EDT
[#45]
I ask if she would like to fondle my balls.
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Posted: 9/28/2004 4:29:13 AM EDT
[#46]
Errr.... Umm......
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Posted: 9/28/2004 4:35:26 AM EDT
[#47]
" Hi , do you have any Italian in you?""NO?" "Would you like some?"
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Posted: 9/28/2004 4:37:31 AM EDT
[#48]
"state law requires me to inform you that I am.............."
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Posted: 9/28/2004 4:50:07 AM EDT
[#49]
Get on da hood o my car, and spread um!
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Posted: 9/28/2004 5:05:52 AM EDT
[#50]
Make eye contact... look away... do repeatedly... walk up to her and her friends... place quarter in front of her, say nothing... walk away... make eye contact, look away... the hook has been baited... she will approach and ask what the quarter is for. Smile evily and whisper in her ear... so you can tell your mother you won't be coming home tonight... You'd be surprised how much that one works... not that they ever call their mother in this day and age...
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