Urgent and angry text from wife. - Page 2

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Posted: 8/29/2017 4:18:23 PM EDT

[#1]

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Quoted:
You'll be sorry when your wife finds out there are no snakes in Alaska

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If there were enough machine work there, we'd be headed that way after the kids were out of school. We both like the cold, sparse population, etc.

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:23:32 PM EDT

[#2]

Quote History

Quoted:

I hear people say this bull from time to time.

Mice leave little pellets and chew things in little bites.

Snakes fucking will bite you. Non-venomous snake bites will hurt like shit and get infected. Venomous bites will hurt LIKE MORE SHIT and possibly cost you a limb or your life, not to mention a $40,000 hospital bill because anti-venom is not en elective treatment when you need it.

So you can take all that big dick Buck Yeager talk. You're full of shit. Snakes suck and should be killed, then leave out green bait in poison traps and kill the mice.

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I have been bit by non-venomous snakes several times.

I'll take the snakes over the rats and mice. Snakes don't destroy expensive things and piss all over the place, and all but the small ones try their best to stay out of your way.

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:36:57 PM EDT

[#3]

Quote History

Quoted:

She already believes that.

She is full on Indiana Jones and thinks the backyard is so infested the dog won't go do his business.

I do think he may have gotten nipped on the nose when badgering one because he's the sensitive type.

Should I stop at Walmart and pick up a dozen or so rubber snakes to strategically place around the house?

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In Before the ARFCOM Curse thread!

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:39:28 PM EDT

[#4]

My wife has done that when I was at work 30 miles away.

I waited till work was over to come home. She was not amused.

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:41:45 PM EDT

[#5]

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Quoted:
I never get texts like that.

All my wife ever sends me are "What do you want for dinner", "Need anything from the store", and titty pics.

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i just get the first 2 and my wife has a great rack.

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:43:14 PM EDT

[#6]

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Quoted:
What kind of bludgeon and how long did he beat on that thing?

He'll be sore tomorrow.

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ThTs whT u was thinking too

. That snake is broken seven ways from sunday

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:43:45 PM EDT

[#7]

Quote History

Quoted:

I have been bit by non-venomous snakes several times.

I'll take the snakes over the rats and mice. Snakes don't destroy expensive things and piss all over the place, and all but the small ones try their best to stay out of your way.

View Quote

The red fox hat I made and have shown in pics, here before, was destroyed last year by mice. Went to get it out and it was in pieces. Not even salvageable at all.

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:46:01 PM EDT

[#8]

Tell your wife I was up til 2AM killing mice in the house. Setting traps, resetting traps, and chasing them through closets.

2nd litter of the summer.

I vacuumed poop out of one of my ice skates this morning and found 2 more mice in traps.

Thinking about a couple pet snakes. I'll have to run that by the landlady.

FYI A bunch of machine shops in the Flathead Valley, MT. Some make firearms and firearm related stuff. It's an extremely friendly area for gun and gun part manufacturers. I can think of 6 off the top of my head. All within a 20 mile drive of my house.

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:48:25 PM EDT

[#9]

Quote History

Quoted:
What kind of bludgeon and how long did he beat on that thing?

He'll be sore tomorrow.

View Quote

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:49:41 PM EDT

[#10]

Quote History

Quoted:
At first glance, I thought that was a photo of a giant crack in your slab. That suddenly appearing would qualify as an "oh shit" moment.

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Posted: 8/29/2017 4:54:44 PM EDT

[#11]

Quote History

Quoted:
Problem solved
Problem staying solved

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Those guys went full retard really hard.

Posted: 8/29/2017 4:54:59 PM EDT

[#12]

Buy the rubber snakes and you'll join the ARfcom Curse Club.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:00:47 PM EDT

[#13]

Pics of wife?

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:01:25 PM EDT

[#14]

Quote History

Quoted:
Buy the rubber snakes and you'll join the ARfcom Curse Club.

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On the other side of that coin, rubber mice could could be used to earn ridgerunner 'favors'.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:02:17 PM EDT

[#15]

Quote History

Quoted:
I hear people say this bull from time to time.

Mice leave little pellets and chew things in little bites.

Snakes fucking will bite you. Non-venomous snake bites will hurt like shit and get infected. Venomous bites will hurt LIKE MORE SHIT and possibly cost you a limb or your life, not to mention a $40,000 hospital bill because anti-venom is not en elective treatment when you need it.

So you can take all that big dick Buck Yeager talk. You're full of shit. Snakes suck and should be killed, then leave out green bait in poison traps and kill the mice.

View Quote

I'm getting tagged almost daily now - it's baby season. I'll let you know when it hurts and the infection shows up but don't hold your breath waiting.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:04:44 PM EDT

[#16]

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Quoted:
How many diseases do snakes spread compared to rodents?

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Rodents spread ticks faster than any other mammal. Ticks carry lyme and that other disease that makes you allergic to red meat. I'll take the snakes.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:06:42 PM EDT

[#17]

I got a similar text a couple of weeks ago.
Wife said a coon was down by the trash cans laying on the ground, labored breathing. Probably got a hold of some of her cooking.

Anyway hunni, I'm at work, what do you want me to do about it?
She says "I can't shoot it"
I text her back "ok, I'll deal with it when I get home"

About 10 minutes later I get these pics.

Attached File

Attached File

She got up the courage to not let the critter suffer. One shot to the brain bucket from 15 feet with her SIG.
I just about shed a tear I was so proud. She wouldn't kill anything just to kill it, even a snake unless it's a rattle snake.

Here's a pic of the shooter.

Attached File

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:08:48 PM EDT

[#18]

Lol, that snake is fucked up but good.

What was the murder weapon?

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:10:25 PM EDT

[#19]

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:12:45 PM EDT

[#20]

We have a terrorist Cat that kills snakes and mice then drags them to the kitchen where she drops it and struts around. Sometimes she has to kill a snake twice.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:14:20 PM EDT

[#21]

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:14:21 PM EDT

[#22]

Might I suggest the toothpick crossbow from an earlier thread for your future mouse hunting forays...

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:16:22 PM EDT

[#23]

Quote History

Quoted:

She already believes that.

She is full on Indiana Jones and thinks the backyard is so infested the dog won't go do his business.

I do think he may have gotten nipped on the nose when badgering one because he's the sensitive type.

Should I stop at Walmart and pick up a dozen or so rubber snakes to strategically place around the house?

View Quote

Pick up a 50 count of mice and drive home the lesson!

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:17:16 PM EDT

[#24]

Quote History

Quoted:

She already believes that.

She is full on Indiana Jones and thinks the backyard is so infested the dog won't go do his business.

I do think he may have gotten nipped on the nose when badgering one because he's the sensitive type.

Should I stop at Walmart and pick up a dozen or so rubber snakes to strategically place around the house?

View Quote

Here's what you do.

1 rubber lifelike snake
1 thumbtack
1 length of fishing line

Take the rubber snake and attach the fishing line to its head. I'd punch a hole in the top of it between the eyes and the nose to make sure it's a straight pull. Tie it fast.

Tie the other end to the thumbtack. You want about 12" of line in between.

Put the snake in one of the cupboards... on the plates or whatever. Towards the outside, on the handle side of the door. Put the snake back in a ways, and attach the thumbtack to the cupboard door.

When she opens up the cupboard door, the snake will come flying out. Fun will be had by all.

Please take video and post it.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:17:20 PM EDT

[#25]

Quote History

Quoted:
My wife thought I was nuts for shooting snakes in the garage. Now that they're in the basement family room, she's fine with any measure taken to eradicate the bastards.

.22 snakeshot? Bah! Load up the 12ga!

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Around here, folks know they are beneficial and either leave them alone or relocate them.
But then, around here folks have a lot of common sense and grown up reasoning skills. Please don't move here.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:18:32 PM EDT

[#26]

man he killed the shit out of that snake!

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:22:56 PM EDT

[#27]

I'll take sneks over friggin' rodents... all day, and every day. Rodents vector all sorts of human disease.

Non-venomous snakes? I can't think of a single human infection they spread.

OP: you could get some Geckos. They are mostly nocturnal, and bigger species eat mice. I had a buddy who was a PhD Herpetologist, and he had Tokay Geckos in his house. They had free run of the place, and it was a rare occasion if you ever saw them. If you were going to the bathroom at night, you might see one hanging on the wall, but that was it.

He had no mice... and no roaches. The Geckos are voracious predators of both, and they ate ALL of them.

ETA: but be careful trying to handle Tokay Geckos. They have a very strong bite... they can seriously draw blood. Fortunately, they're shy, and not aggressive... though your cat may eat them.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:28:11 PM EDT

[#28]

Those black rat snakes will release a musk and crap over everything as a defense mechanism, and it stinks! If you notice a bad smell in your garage that's where it came from. I had a 4+ footer by my back door the other day and shooed him away toward the woods with a rake. Yep - he stunk up the area real bad. Glad it was outside.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:31:35 PM EDT

[#29]

Quote History

Quoted:
She already believes that.

She is full on Indiana Jones and thinks the backyard is so infested the dog won't go do his business.

I do think he may have gotten nipped on the nose when badgering one because he's the sensitive type.

Should I stop at Walmart and pick up a dozen or so rubber snakes to strategically place around the house?

View Quote View All Quotes

View All Quotes

Quote History

Quoted:

Quoted:
"clearly a juvenile...from a litter of at least 20"

make sure you tell her that when you get home.

She already believes that.

She is full on Indiana Jones and thinks the backyard is so infested the dog won't go do his business.

I do think he may have gotten nipped on the nose when badgering one because he's the sensitive type.

Should I stop at Walmart and pick up a dozen or so rubber snakes to strategically place around the house?

A game camera in the bathroom might be safer...

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:33:24 PM EDT

[#30]

Quote History

Quoted:

Should I stop at Walmart and pick up a dozen or so rubber snakes to strategically place around the house?

View Quote

You know it!

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:34:39 PM EDT

[#31]

Quote History

Quoted:
I hear people say this bull from time to time.

Mice leave little pellets and chew things in little bites.

Snakes fucking will bite you. Non-venomous snake bites will hurt like shit and get infected. Venomous bites will hurt LIKE MORE SHIT and possibly cost you a limb or your life, not to mention a $40,000 hospital bill because anti-venom is not en elective treatment when you need it.

So you can take all that big dick Buck Yeager talk. You're full of shit. Snakes suck and should be killed, then leave out green bait in poison traps and kill the mice.

View Quote View All Quotes

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Quote History

Quoted:

Quoted:
And now you have a mouse problem.

I'd rather have the snakes.

I hear people say this bull from time to time.

Mice leave little pellets and chew things in little bites.

Snakes fucking will bite you. Non-venomous snake bites will hurt like shit and get infected. Venomous bites will hurt LIKE MORE SHIT and possibly cost you a limb or your life, not to mention a $40,000 hospital bill because anti-venom is not en elective treatment when you need it.

So you can take all that big dick Buck Yeager talk. You're full of shit. Snakes suck and should be killed, then leave out green bait in poison traps and kill the mice.

Waah. It's a pinch with possible scratch. Wash it out well, maybe some OTC antibiotic creme, you'll be fine. Those mouse pellets can carry disease, and they'll tear the shit out of electrical wiring.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:36:02 PM EDT

[#32]

LOL.....The sammich-maker was walking the dog and said there was a big snake outside. I figured it was just the 5' black snake that lives under the firewood rack so I put on some gloves and went out and retrieved it.

I showed her it was just a black snake and not to mess with it.....I returned it to it's home.

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:40:35 PM EDT

[#33]

OP, pick up a bag of the rubber snakes, and take them outside and place them near bushes and trees, but where she can see you from the window.

Go out, and dive on top of one, and wrestle it for a bit, roll around on the ground, give a good performance, and them toss it and shoot it.

Do the same with a few more.

I'm sure she'll figure it out eventually, and you'll be in deeper doo, but, it would be so much fun,

ESPECIALLY IF YOU FILM IT AND POST IT.

Get your son in on it, let him take the video, and post it up.

PLEASE - PLEASE

Posted: 8/29/2017 5:42:09 PM EDT

[#34]

Quote History

Quoted:

I'll take sneks over friggin' rodents... all day, and every day. Rodents vector all sorts of human disease.

Non-venomous snakes? I can't think of a single human infection they spread.

OP: you could get some Geckos. They are mostly nocturnal, and bigger species eat mice. I had a buddy who was a PhD Herpetologist, and he had Tokay Geckos in his house. They had free run of the place, and it was a rare occasion if you ever saw them. If you were going to the bathroom at night, you might see one hanging on the wall, but that was it.

He had no mice... and no roaches. The Geckos are voracious predators of both, and they ate ALL of them.

ETA: but be careful trying to handle Tokay Geckos. They have a very strong bite... they can seriously draw blood. Fortunately, they're shy, and not aggressive... though your cat may eat them.

View Quote View All Quotes

View All Quotes

Quote History

Quoted:

I'll take sneks over friggin' rodents... all day, and every day. Rodents vector all sorts of human disease.

Non-venomous snakes? I can't think of a single human infection they spread.

OP: you could get some Geckos. They are mostly nocturnal, and bigger species eat mice. I had a buddy who was a PhD Herpetologist, and he had Tokay Geckos in his house. They had free run of the place, and it was a rare occasion if you ever saw them. If you were going to the bathroom at night, you might see one hanging on the wall, but that was it.

He had no mice... and no roaches. The Geckos are voracious predators of both, and they ate ALL of them.

ETA: but be careful trying to handle Tokay Geckos. They have a very strong bite... they can seriously draw blood. Fortunately, they're shy, and not aggressive... though your cat may eat them.

I could just see myself trying to convince the wife to let me stock the house with foot long geckos....that wouldn't go well.

Attached File

Quoted:
OP, pick up a bag of the rubber snakes, and take them outside and place them near bushes and trees, but where she can see you from the window.

Go out, and dive on top of one, and wrestle it for a bit, roll around on the ground, give a good performance, and them toss it and shoot it.

Do the same with a few more.

I'm sure she'll figure it out eventually, and you'll be in deeper doo, but, it would be so much fun,

ESPECIALLY IF YOU FILM IT AND POST IT.

Get your son in on it, let him take the video, and post it up.

PLEASE - PLEASE

Yes PLEASE do this - I'll throw in a PMAG if you do.

Posted: 8/29/2017 6:02:03 PM EDT

[#35]

Quote History

Quoted:
man he killed the shit out of that snake!

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Just looked at it, here at the house. He just smashed the head with an M1 Garand stock that was laying there. (it's a scrap stock)

I'm guessing the nerves kinked up the body like that.

edit for accuracy

Posted: 8/29/2017 6:04:34 PM EDT

[#36]

Quote History

Quoted:
"clearly a juvenile...from a litter of at least 20"

make sure you tell her that when you get home.

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Yes. This. Tell her that the mama is probaly 10 feet long

Posted: 8/29/2017 6:55:10 PM EDT

[#37]

Quote History

Quoted:
At first glance, I thought that was a photo of a giant crack in your slab. That suddenly appearing would qualify as an "oh shit" moment.

View Quote

So did I.

Posted: 8/29/2017 7:05:28 PM EDT

[#38]

No step on snek

Posted: 8/29/2017 7:07:04 PM EDT

[#39]

Quote History

Quoted:

She already believes that.

She is full on Indiana Jones and thinks the backyard is so infested the dog won't go do his business.

I do think he may have gotten nipped on the nose when badgering one because he's the sensitive type.

Should I stop at Walmart and pick up a dozen or so rubber snakes to strategically place around the house?

View Quote

I had a public speaking professor tell us a story, he had a student do a speech about snakes, halfway through the speech he pulls a snake out the bag and starts walking around with it freaking out the class. He gets near the professor who is staring at the snake and tosses it on him. He said he screamed like a little girl and pissed himself. Turns out it was a rubber snake, but the student got kicked out of the school.

Posted: 8/29/2017 7:12:35 PM EDT

[#40]

LOL! Ohio! Come to the southeast, we will show you what snakes look like.

Posted: 8/29/2017 7:15:32 PM EDT

[#41]

Looks as if your son beat it to death with a waffle iron.

Posted: 8/29/2017 7:18:44 PM EDT

[#42]

Quote History

Quoted:
I hear people say this bull from time to time.

Mice leave little pellets and chew things in little bites.

Snakes fucking will bite you. Non-venomous snake bites will hurt like shit and get infected. Venomous bites will hurt LIKE MORE SHIT and possibly cost you a limb or your life, not to mention a $40,000 hospital bill because anti-venom is not en elective treatment when you need it.

So you can take all that big dick Buck Yeager talk. You're full of shit. Snakes suck and should be killed, then leave out green bait in poison traps and kill the mice.

View Quote View All Quotes

View All Quotes

Quote History

Quoted:

Quoted:
And now you have a mouse problem.

I'd rather have the snakes.

I hear people say this bull from time to time.

Mice leave little pellets and chew things in little bites.

Snakes fucking will bite you. Non-venomous snake bites will hurt like shit and get infected. Venomous bites will hurt LIKE MORE SHIT and possibly cost you a limb or your life, not to mention a $40,000 hospital bill because anti-venom is not en elective treatment when you need it.

So you can take all that big dick Buck Yeager talk. You're full of shit. Snakes suck and should be killed, then leave out green bait in poison traps and kill the mice.

Yawn. Never been bitten by a snake. Handled everything from gardeners to pit vipers. It helps to know your area of operations and what is friend or foe. A common black snake is not going to give you the venom of black death. In fact, pretty sure the black plague was from fleas on vermin, so there... mice are worse.

Posted: 8/29/2017 7:27:30 PM EDT

[#43]

Quote History

Quoted:
Stop on the way home and pick up a bag full of rubber snakes. You can hold them up so she can see them out the kitchen window, she'll swoon for you again.

ETA: Obviously we were thinking the same thoughts, weird.

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She'll love you even more if you coil one up inside the microwave.

Probably helpful if you wear your Kevlar.

Posted: 8/29/2017 7:29:28 PM EDT

[#44]

Quote History

Quoted:

I hear people say this bull from time to time.

Mice leave little pellets and chew things in little bites.

Snakes fucking will bite you. Non-venomous snake bites will hurt like shit and get infected. Venomous bites will hurt LIKE MORE SHIT and possibly cost you a limb or your life, not to mention a $40,000 hospital bill because anti-venom is not en elective treatment when you need it.

So you can take all that big dick Buck Yeager talk. You're full of shit. Snakes suck and should be killed, then leave out green bait in poison traps and kill the mice.

View Quote

That could be the dumbest thing I've heard today, or this week, or ever.

Posted: 8/29/2017 7:38:36 PM EDT

[#45]

Quote History

Quoted:
What kind of bludgeon and how long did he beat on that thing?

He'll be sore tomorrow.

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My thought exactly

Posted: 8/29/2017 8:16:01 PM EDT

[#46]

Quote History

Quoted:

I'll take sneks over friggin' rodents... all day, and every day. Rodents vector all sorts of human disease.

Non-venomous snakes? I can't think of a single human infection they spread.

OP: you could get some Geckos. They are mostly nocturnal, and bigger species eat mice. I had a buddy who was a PhD Herpetologist, and he had Tokay Geckos in his house. They had free run of the place, and it was a rare occasion if you ever saw them. If you were going to the bathroom at night, you might see one hanging on the wall, but that was it.

He had no mice... and no roaches. The Geckos are voracious predators of both, and they ate ALL of them.

ETA: but be careful trying to handle Tokay Geckos. They have a very strong bite... they can seriously draw blood. Fortunately, they're shy, and not aggressive... though your cat may eat them.

View Quote

Had a job in a pet store as a kid.
Got bit by a Tokay once.....that was surprisingly painful. They have a pretty good bite.
Not cripplingly so, or as bad as a Savannah or Nile Monitor, but still very surprising for a lizard that size.

We used to live in Hawaii and gecko's were everywhere. Good house guests, but can be noisy at night.

Posted: 8/29/2017 8:18:12 PM EDT

[#47]

Quote History

Quoted:

I could just see myself trying to convince the wife to let me stock the house with foot long geckos....that wouldn't go well.

https://www.AR15.Com/media/mediaFiles/67501/800px-Tokay_gecko__Gekko_gecko__adult_male_and_juvenile-293653.JPG

View Quote

Dont ask for permission. Just do it and ask for forgiveness later.

Posted: 8/29/2017 8:41:22 PM EDT

[#48]

Quote History

Quoted:

Had a job in a pet store as a kid.
Got bit by a Tokay once.....that was surprisingly painful. They have a pretty good bite.
Not cripplingly so, or as bad as a Savannah or Nile Monitor, but still very surprising for a lizard that size.

We used to live in Hawaii and gecko's were everywhere. Good house guests, but can be noisy at night.

View Quote

Handling a tokay is a lot like handling a snake. You have to control the head. Somewhere I have pics of me holding some, illustrating the proper method. I'll look for em later and post up.