[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Possum problem (Page 1 of 2)
Posted: 11/18/2014 10:13:49 AM EDT
| I have a fukt up possum in my front yard. It's alive but barely. Must have been hit by a car and crawled up in the yard. I called animal control, they only do dogs and cats. Called a private outfit, they want $109 to remove it. Should I MYOB, let it die and bury it? Smack it with a shovel to kill it and possibly get charged with cruelty to an animal? Pop it in the head with a .22 and possibly get in trouble with the PoPo? I'm gonna try Backing up the car and gas his ass with the exhaust and see if that does it. |
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Take a machete, or other long knife, and use a hammer to baton it's head off.
I have a lot of possum experiance. It may not be as injured as you think. I usually put them in a bucket and release them elsewhere. I live in the burbs but we get quite a bit of critters. My doggie hurt the last one kind of bad. I shot it with subsonic 22 out of a rifle. It was pretty quiet but not as quick as I would have liked. Probably just seemed that way. Batoning the head off is better. I'm going that route the next time. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
| You must be new to opossums. You can hit it with your shovel. It won't die. You can shoot it. It won't die. You can cut its head off and it won't die. The opossum is the bastard marsupial god decided to make extinct but accidentally buried in the pet cemetery. |
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Pick it up with the shovel and carry it around the side of the house away from prying neighbors if thats an issue - either whack it with the shovel, or put the shovel blade to the neck and cleave the head off. Throw in woods behind house, or bury it in the backyard if you have some lime to throw over it.
SSS - Smack, Shovel, and Shut Up |
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Yum. Lots of good possum recipes. http://bertc.com/subfive/recipes/possum.htm  |
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Quoted:
THIS is why I own a 22 short! I used a short at first and was surprized at how loud and snappy it sounded. They've been driving my dogs crazy lately. I'm going to stop relocating them and just start killing them, which gives me no joy, but I have chickens, plus there are so many possums! I'll bet I've caught 6 in the past month. They aren't the sames ones either. I live next to a golf course, it's kind of like a wildlife area. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
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Last one in my chicken coop got a boot foot on its head and then two solid whacks with a garden hoe.
Then I reach down picked it up by its tail and tossed it in my woods... My dog has cuaght three so far...she's got a hard on fir those fuckers for some reason. Oh and op ....just kill it already and be a man.. :p Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
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Quoted:
I used a short at first and was surprized at how loud and snappy it sounded. They've been driving my dogs crazy lately. I'm going to stop relocating them and just start killing them, which gives me no joy, but I have chickens, plus there are so many possums! I'll bet I've caught 6 in the past month. They aren't the sames ones either. I live next to a golf course, it's kind of like a wildlife area. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile Quoted:
Quoted:
THIS is why I own a 22 short! I used a short at first and was surprized at how loud and snappy it sounded. They've been driving my dogs crazy lately. I'm going to stop relocating them and just start killing them, which gives me no joy, but I have chickens, plus there are so many possums! I'll bet I've caught 6 in the past month. They aren't the sames ones either. I live next to a golf course, it's kind of like a wildlife area. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile Problem is, every time you kill a opossum three show up the next day for the funeral' |
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Quoted:
I have a fukt up possum in my front yard. It's alive but barely. Must have been hit by a car and crawled up in the yard. I called animal control, they only do dogs and cats. Called a private outfit, they want $109 to remove it. Should I MYOB, let it die and bury it? Smack it with a shovel to kill it and possibly get charged with cruelty to an animal? Pop it in the head with a .22 and possibly get in trouble with the PoPo? I'm gonna try Backing up the car and gas his ass with the exhaust and see if that does it. 1. Separate its head from its body. 2. Use the parts to make things. 3. Profit 
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OP do you need to borrow my man card and my steel-toed boots?
1) Approach the possum perpendicular to his direction of travel...if he is stationary approach him from his left side. 2) Apply the afore mentioned steel toe to the side of his head with much vigor and speed. 3) Go back inside. 4) Tell us how great it feels not to be a Nancy. 
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Now I know where James Cameron got his inspiration for the Cyborgs in the terminator movie/sequels. With a herculean effort my obviously cellophane wrapped candy ass managed to finally dispatch the critter. 
Head shot with a .22 short HP then drowned in a recycle bin. |
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Quoted:
Now I know where James Cameron got his inspiration for the Cyborgs in the terminator movie/sequels. With a herculean effort my obviously cellophane wrapped candy ass managed to finally dispatch the critter.
Head shot with a .22 short HP then drowned in a recycle bin. Why did you waste the ammo? |
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Quoted:
You must be new to opossums. You can hit it with your shovel. It won't die. You can shoot it. It won't die. You can cut its head off and it won't die. The opossum is the bastard marsupial god decided to make extinct but accidentally buried in the pet cemetery. true x 2 193 to the head at 10 yards...works 
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Screw can on single shot .22
Load subsonic round into single shot 22 Walk out in yard at dusk or dawn with single shot 22 carried behind leg Stop slightly past the animal on the ground Shoot animal in head with 22 hidden behind leg Go back into the house Remove dead possum later |
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Quoted: If you can't spell it, you're not qualified to kill it. You know, when spelled correctly, if you shuffle the letters, add a letter and throw out a few, the word opossum becomes Osama or Obama. Act accordingly. So the USMC isn't qualified to kill anything? |
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So the USMC isn't qualified to kill anything? Quoted:
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If you can't spell it, you're not qualified to kill it. You know, when spelled correctly, if you shuffle the letters, add a letter and throw out a few, the word opossum becomes Osama or Obama. Act accordingly. So the USMC isn't qualified to kill anything? Never said that. "You" is a singular noun. It's a special qualification I invented just for the OP. ETA: USMC? Is that the thing Obama thinks is pronounced Unites States Marine "Corpse"? |
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If you can't spell it, you're not qualified to kill it. You know, when spelled correctly, if you shuffle the letters, add a letter and throw out a few, the word opossum becomes Osama or Obama. Act accordingly. My new sig line. well played familiar well played |
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My new sig line. well played familiar well played Quoted:
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If you can't spell it, you're not qualified to kill it. You know, when spelled correctly, if you shuffle the letters, add a letter and throw out a few, the word opossum becomes Osama or Obama. Act accordingly. My new sig line. well played familiar well played Careful with that or some smartass will accuse you of shilling for me; trying to sell my inanity without my having signed up for site sponsorship and paying my advertising bill. Fortunately my "Stupid Sayings" product line has a NPV of $-1, so let 'em sue me! 
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Careful with that or some smartass will accuse you of shilling for me; trying to sell my inanity without my having signed up for site sponsorship and paying my advertising bill. Fortunately my "Stupid Sayings" product line has a NPV of $-1, so let 'em sue me! Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
If you can't spell it, you're not qualified to kill it. You know, when spelled correctly, if you shuffle the letters, add a letter and throw out a few, the word opossum becomes Osama or Obama. Act accordingly. My new sig line. well played familiar well played Careful with that or some smartass will accuse you of shilling for me; trying to sell my inanity without my having signed up for site sponsorship and paying my advertising bill. Fortunately my "Stupid Sayings" product line has a NPV of $-1, so let 'em sue me! 
your internetfamousally...will you sign my OBAssum for me i will sell on the local fergishudokraiglishian...2 morrow
ETA..the grapes makes you say...wild shit
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