Posted: 10/5/2002 4:08:42 PM EDT
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Since antigun people are functionally useless they can only serve as a source of amusement and diversion. The secret is their limited reasoning capacity. Next time you are forced to deal with them try these: 1. HCI and Sarah Brady finally convinced you. Normally you would NEVER own a gun until you found out exactly how many dangerous "gun people" were out there. As a result of all those guns and gun people you felt compelled to get a gun to protect yourself from them. Of course you will get rid of your gun but ONLY when they finally get rid of all the criminals and other dangerous people with guns. Just as soon as they do that you will get rid of yours, but until then you are gonna keep it just in case. 2. Point out the merits of other weapons like machetes. After all machetes are cheap and easy to obtain. Very few laws regulate ownership or possession. They are silent, effective and cause horrificly fatal wounds. They are extermely difficult to defend against and give the wielder a dramatic advantage. Unlike guns they can be used to later chop up and hide the bodies of victims. In fact about the only thing that can stop a guy with a machete is a gun. And THAT is why you favor getting rid of guns. 3. Get your own ridiculous agenda. Listen intently to the antigun arguments and agree with the points. Then recruit them for YOUR agenda, the abolishment of the Free Press. After all just like the Second Amendment refers ONLY to the "state militia" the First Amendment refers ONLY to the "state press." Freedom of Speech was never intended for ordinary individuals. After all, it takes experts to correctly indentify, interpret and report current events. This is not something that should be left to unskilled, unregulated individuals. All media should be controlled and regulated by the State. But since their second amendment argument establishes a precedent for your first amendment argument you wholeheartedly support it. 4. Make it a race issue. Always, always, always attach race to ridiculous agruments to give them the proper levels of absurdity. Agree that guns should be banned EXCEPT for "insert favorite race here." After all you can't take guns away from Blacks. "Gangsta" is a important part of the "black identity" and taking guns from blacks will rob them of their cultural identity. And you can't take away guns from the Chinese, they invented guns and this would rob them of their birthright and heritage. And Native Americans used guns to fight the white invaders who robbed them of their land and raped their culture. You weren't gonna take their guns away too were you?!? 5. The Black Market needs the help. There are many people in this country who cannot get good, legitimate jobs because they are NOT US citizens or may have criminal histories. They NEED the illegal gun market as s source of income for themselves, their children and any substance dependencies they may have. Despite negative publicity, they are in fact very hard workers and make sure they can provide guns to those who could not otherwise obtain them. Gun legislation gives these "forgotten souls" a boost to their enterprises and insures they have the money for the things they need. |