[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Foing (Page 1 of 2)
Posted: 1/22/2012 8:58:37 PM EDT
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Dear Arfcom...
Random chick from dating website has messaged me and wants to meet for drinks at 1AM. Paranoia in full swing, but this could be worth it for the story. If I don't report back tomorrow, well, guess it doesn't matter. So long! |
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We have fent, and returned unscathed. Kidneys intact, money retained, and OPSEC maintained.
On the other hand, we have decided that industrial-strength crazy, no matter how hot the body, is still definitely the anti-boner. I'm fairly certain this gal exhibited no less than three or four entries from the DSV-IV, potentially including, but not limited to, ADHD, borderline disorder, conduct disorder, schizophrenia, disassociative identity disorder, bipolar disorder, unspecified sleep disorder, and a few other things that I can't readily categorize. Within the first few minutes of conversation on the phone she informed me that she habitually carried a weapon without a permit (unverified, she did have two large handbags so it's possible), had multiple fake IDs and disposable phone numbers (believable, since she wore color-changing contacts and carried three different phones), worked for a secret organization, and had several friends living in her closet (whom later turned out to apparently be some sort of imaginary guardians). The address she sent me to turned out to be a city park, from which I was then directed to drive several blocks through the neighborhood to where she was walking down the street (good OPSEC on her part I suppose, although creepy). Nice tits and ass, I must say, and a decently cute face. On the other hand, she continually hinted throughout the conversation that she hates almost all people, had met and become engaged with a guy within two weeks before he dumped her (somehow I suspect truth in that one), was emotionally formed by her presumably imaginary employer/friend/guardian at the age of 8 when she simultaneously hit puberty, became an adult, and learned both 27 computer languages and 4 foreign languages. Also that she only sleeps 3-4 hours per week on average (Tyler Durden, anyone?), and works under the table at a high school teaching autistic adults. Dr. Drew could probably devote an entire episode to this one. We wound up getting a drink at Starbucks, where she proceeded to harass/flirt with/stalk the two random dudes working behind the counter, until I finally insisted that we leave. Subsequently we wandered around Wal-Mart for a while, watching the employees stock the shelves - she seemed to know almost a dozen of the employees from previous visits, and kept attempting to harass them in various ways. She'd simultaneously rub herself on me while saying that she refused to talk to anyone who smokes, drinks, or has sex. She wanted to come back to my place to watch a movie but by that point I really, really didn't want her to know where I lived or anything that I own - never once did I identify my job, workplace, last name, address, or education. When someone claims that they're an experienced hacker, presents signs of serious schizophrenia, and repeatedly engages in stalker behavior of someone else while you're standing right there...I start to get protective of my kidneys. On the drive back to her home she alternated between flirting with me and pouting that I didn't like her and that I hadn't had any fun with her. Halfway through the conversation, while driving down a two lane road, she suddenly flipped out and claimed that I'd nearly run over a "black guy wearing black clothes, and black ski mask, and carrying a gun" who was walking down the road....I never saw a thing. When we arrived she acted depressed, claiming rejection, then tried to curl into my lap and sleep, before jumping awake, kissing me, and running off. And so that the rules remain unviolated: 
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Quoted: We have fent, and returned unscathed. Kidneys intact, money retained, and OPSEC maintained. On the other hand, we have decided that industrial-strength crazy, no matter how hot the body, is still definitely the anti-boner. I'm fairly certain this gal exhibited no less than three or four entries from the DSV-IV, potentially including, but not limited to, ADHD, borderline disorder, conduct disorder, schizophrenia, disassociative identity disorder, bipolar disorder, unspecified sleep disorder, and a few other things that I can't readily categorize. Within the first few minutes of conversation on the phone she informed me that she habitually carried a weapon without a permit (unverified, she did have two large handbags so it's possible), had multiple fake IDs and disposable phone numbers (believable, since she wore color-changing contacts and carried three different phones), worked for a secret organization, and had several friends living in her closet (whom later turned out to apparently be some sort of imaginary guardians). The address she sent me to turned out to be a city park, from which I was then directed to drive several blocks through the neighborhood to where she was walking down the street (good OPSEC on her part I suppose, although creepy). Nice tits and ass, I must say, and a decently cute face. On the other hand, she continually hinted throughout the conversation that she hates almost all people, had met and become engaged with a guy within two weeks before he dumped her (somehow I suspect truth in that one), was emotionally formed by her presumably imaginary employer/friend/guardian at the age of 8 when she simultaneously hit puberty, became an adult, and learned both 27 computer languages and 4 foreign languages. Also that she only sleeps 3-4 hours per week on average (Tyler Durden, anyone?), and works under the table at a high school teaching autistic adults. Dr. Drew could probably devote an entire episode to this one. We wound up getting a drink at Starbucks, where she proceeded to harass/flirt with/stalk the two random dudes working behind the counter, until I finally insisted that we leave. Subsequently we wandered around Wal-Mart for a while, watching the employees stock the shelves - she seemed to know almost a dozen of the employees from previous visits, and kept attempting to harass them in various ways. She'd simultaneously rub herself on me while saying that she refused to talk to anyone who smokes, drinks, or has sex. She wanted to come back to my place to watch a movie but by that point I really, really didn't want her to know where I lived or anything that I own - never once did I identify my job, workplace, last name, address, or education. When someone claims that they're an experienced hacker, presents signs of serious schizophrenia, and repeatedly engages in stalker behavior of someone else while you're standing right there...I start to get protective of my kidneys. On the drive back to her home she alternated between flirting with me and pouting that I didn't like her and that I hadn't had any fun with her. Halfway through the conversation, while driving down a two lane road, she suddenly flipped out and claimed that I'd nearly run over a "black guy wearing black clothes, and black ski mask, and carrying a gun" who was walking down the road....I never saw a thing. When we arrived she acted depressed, claiming rejection, then tried to curl into my lap and sleep, before jumping awake, kissing me, and running off. And so that the rules remain unviolated: http://i.imgur.com/DMrNlh.jpg Dude, if you would have tapped that  Ever seen Rose from Two and a Half men?
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Sorry to say but this is not the OP. Crazy chick killed him and harvested his organs. She is now trying to throw us of her scent and continue his normal routines till he "disappears" in a few weeks. And bad cell pic is stock from random Walmart denizen.
Farewell OP......you fent and that is what counts. ;) Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
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She got you. If I were you I'd relocate immediately. While she had you preoccupied thinking about what a nutter she is, she was busy planting bugs and tracking devices for her organization. Fo, before it's too late.  ETA But make sexy time first, she is clearly into role playing. |
