Posted: 10/24/2011 4:37:39 PM EDT
|
Dad buys a lie detector robot which slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it at dinner. "Son where were you today?" Son says, "At school dad." Robot slaps the son! "Ok, I watched a DVD at my friends house!" "What DVD?" "Toy story." Robot slaps the son again! "Ok, it was a porno!"cries the son. "What! When I was your age I didn't know what porn was." says the dad. Robot slaps the dad! Mom laughs, "Ha, Ha, Ha! He's certainly your son." Robot slaps the mom.
_____________________________________________________________________ A guy goes to Boeing to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?" He replies, "Yes, caffeine...I can't drink coffee." "Ok, have you ever been in the military service?" "Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for one tour." The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment." Then he asks, "Are you disabled in anyway?" The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles." The interviewer grimaces (like he feels the pain) and then says, "Okay. You've got enough points for me to hire you right now. Our normal hours are from 6:00 am to 2:30 p.m....(Day Shift) You can start tomorrow at 8:00 am, and plan on starting at 8:00 am every day." The guy is puzzled and asks, "If the work hours are from 6:00 am to 2:30 pm, Why don't you want me here until 8:00 am? "This is a day shift union job", the interviewer says. "For the first two hours, we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our balls. No point coming in for that!" |
