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Link Posted: 8/19/2023 12:47:35 PM EDT
[#1]
Ive been up and down pretty hard the past few months. Had my 20th high school reunion which was fun but got me to thinking what little Ive down with myself and now day after day new things let me know Im on that down slope of life. The longer I wait the harder and harder it's going to get to find that great job, find a girl, have kids, travel like Id like to. My ex broke up with me a number of months ago for not having my life together at my age.  Still really bothers me. She was right which is the worst part. My body is falling apart and my joints aren't healing like they used to. I used a new hair gel and woke up the next morning with a clump of hair on my shoulder. Ive been at the mirror staring at the back of my head for two weeks. Lord knows I need another stresser I can't control.

I have been slowly but surely making strides with my health. Months long progress I finally am going to get my cpap monday. New asthma meds let me work out more if I could just keep my joints healthy. Im going to see an orthopedist about my elbow that has kept me from heavy lifting for over a year (two rounds of physical therapy with no initial diagnosis haven't helped).

Im all over the place and just needed to vent a little.
Link Posted: 8/19/2023 3:59:46 PM EDT
[#2]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By Emeoba69:
Ive been up and down pretty hard the past few months. Had my 20th high school reunion which was fun but got me to thinking what little Ive down with myself and now day after day new things let me know Im on that down slope of life. The longer I wait the harder and harder it's going to get to find that great job, find a girl, have kids, travel like Id like to. My ex broke up with me a number of months ago for not having my life together at my age.  Still really bothers me. She was right which is the worst part. My body is falling apart and my joints aren't healing like they used to. I used a new hair gel and woke up the next morning with a clump of hair on my shoulder. Ive been at the mirror staring at the back of my head for two weeks. Lord knows I need another stresser I can't control.

I have been slowly but surely making strides with my health. Months long progress I finally am going to get my cpap monday. New asthma meds let me work out more if I could just keep my joints healthy. Im going to see an orthopedist about my elbow that has kept me from heavy lifting for over a year (two rounds of physical therapy with no initial diagnosis haven't helped).

Im all over the place and just needed to vent a little.
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Hope it gets better dude. Having physical issues is a tough row to hoe mentally even if they happen when you really feel like you have your shit together. Awesome it sounds like you are actively chipping away at it. Keep at it.

And venting does a body good. Any system with pressure needs a relief valve, don't matter if it's a steam line or our thoughts. Honestly journaling really helps. It sounds like teenage girl "dear diary" type stuff but it's a good form of venting. Working out what you're feeling and getting it out in the world some form or another gets some gears moving that normally don't when we just keep thinking about it. It also helps stuff click when you are putting it down and can see it
Link Posted: 8/24/2023 10:39:34 PM EDT
[Last Edit: BeatsOfftoEVs] [#3]
Here I am again walking along a knife-edge..no choice..controlling the things I can. I got extremely lucky last time..sitting here wondering when my luck will run out.
Link Posted: 8/26/2023 8:53:25 PM EDT
[#4]
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Originally Posted By BeatsOfftoEVs:
Here I am again walking along a knife-edge..no choice..controlling the things I can. I got extremely lucky last time..sitting here wondering when my luck will run out.
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I don't know your situation.  I would encourage you to not frame life in this way.  We all have ups and downs -- not trying to minimize your situation at all.  I hope and will pray that your situation improves.  Best of luck man.  
Link Posted: 8/26/2023 11:06:04 PM EDT
[#5]
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Originally Posted By BeatsOfftoEVs:
Here I am again walking along a knife-edge..no choice..controlling the things I can. I got extremely lucky last time..sitting here wondering when my luck will run out.
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I'll echo what grinning Bob said, get out of that frame of reference. Even if it is a legit bomb dropped on you...just tread water and let it pass. Remember, everything passes....even kidney stones. You got it dude
Link Posted: 8/31/2023 2:06:59 AM EDT
[Last Edit: BeatsOfftoEVs] [#6]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By grinning_bob:


I don't know your situation.  I would encourage you to not frame life in this way.  We all have ups and downs -- not trying to minimize your situation at all.  I hope and will pray that your situation improves.  Best of luck man.  
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Appreciate it. The gist I had a CRVO in my eye almost two years shortly after taking a covid shot...basically ruptured half the blood vessels in my retina in my right eye. I had to go see a specialist who cleared me after year of follow up without needing any treatment. My regular eye doctor says making it thru that and retaining my eyesight and no treatment is nothing short of a miracle. Fast forward to this week and I had a yearly follow up with OCT..well it looks likes like the CRVO is still completely healed but I've now developed cystoid macular edema in the same eye. It hasn't affected my vision yet but basically I have to follow up in 3 months..could get better on its on or could get worse...if it gets worse it's back to the retina specialist and eye injections in my future and possibly vision loss.

The waiting to find out is the hardest part…had to go thru that with the CRVO and now have to go through it again
Link Posted: 9/3/2023 11:33:26 AM EDT
[#7]
I've recently had to re-live the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life. I've battled depression for the lest 35 years because of it.
Now, the center of that mistake was put front and center in my life again. I briefly saw a chance to redeem my life, but that may have just been God's sense of humor.
I haven't felt this amount of pain in a very long time.
I'm afraid that I will spiral into a place so dark that I'll not be able to find any humor in that dark.

Not sure what I'm asking for, but I need to leave some record of this, I guess.
Link Posted: 9/4/2023 2:59:52 PM EDT
[#8]
@Wandering_Moses
Please don't do anything hasty. What's going on?
Link Posted: 9/4/2023 4:20:28 PM EDT
[#9]
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Originally Posted By solid:
@Wandering_Moses
Please don't do anything hasty. What's going on?
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I'm here. Not doing anything stupid.
Just having a rough time with some very complicated stuff.
Thanks
Link Posted: 9/4/2023 5:38:50 PM EDT
[#10]
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Originally Posted By Wandering_Moses:

I'm here. Not doing anything stupid.
Just having a rough time with some very complicated stuff.
Thanks
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Originally Posted By Wandering_Moses:
Originally Posted By solid:
@Wandering_Moses
Please don't do anything hasty. What's going on?

I'm here. Not doing anything stupid.
Just having a rough time with some very complicated stuff.
Thanks

You're not alone. I know that things can get bad especially when we step in the same shit we've already stepped in. Feel free to message me if you need to talk.
Link Posted: 9/5/2023 7:45:04 PM EDT
[Last Edit: MinorMonstruwacan] [#11]
I've lurked here on and off for quite a while and want to say to all of you who have it much worse than I do - whether in your circumstances or in your capacity to handle them - but still have had the courage to share and to reach out: I appreciate you. And the same to all of you who are here to help and offer an encouraging word.

---snip---
Link Posted: 9/5/2023 7:53:04 PM EDT
[Last Edit: grinning_bob] [#12]
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Originally Posted By MinorMonstruwacan:
I've lurked here on and off for quite a while and want to say to all of you who have it much worse than I do - whether in your circumstances or in your capacity to handle them - but still have had the courage to share and to reach out: I appreciate you. And the same to all of you who are here to help and offer an encouraging word.

So here's a kinda crazy shot-in-the-dark request: anyone here in SE Wisconsin willing to do some listening FTF? I'm not an active suicide risk at the moment. And hopefully won't ever be. But I'm not just feeling a little down this week either.  (In fact, I'm feeling better than average. Otherwise I'd never have the optimism to try this..)
I've thought about professionals but can't bring myself to believe I could find one I'd be compatible with. But for someone random my expectations would be minimal: just let me be totally honest about my life. I can also be a good listener myself so if this was an exchage where we switch who's on the couch halfway through, that would work fine for me.
Now it's sounding almost maybe like this is a personals ad. It's not. The main topic would be my lousy marriage and home life and I guess my one other requirement is that even if you happen to think divorce would be best in my situation, you're capaple of just saying so and then setting that aside. If you're one of the hardcore divorce advocates that show up in some of the other GD threads, you'll probably lose patience with me pretty quick... I'm not looking for a friend either. The point will be for me to be fully honest and it's not going to make me an appealing person. I am willing to pay you for your time.

Anyway. I feel like I've gone on way too long and haven't said any of the right things. I'll probably leave this up for an hour or a day and then get disgusted with myself and delete it. Thanks for reading.

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I sincerely wish you the best.  I know it is an old trope but it is also true --- everything heals with time. Your offer is interesting but you may be in a position where professional counseling is the best course of action. I hope I don't come off wrong and maybe there is someone here who is willing and able to listen.
Link Posted: 9/6/2023 10:54:56 AM EDT
[Last Edit: djkest] [#13]
Two years ago my friend shot himself in the head in front of his girlfriend. He was a valuable human being to many people, though he struggled with some of his demons.

Another friend who counted (friend 1) as his best friend never recovered after his death. He became an alcoholic and gained weight, developed health problems and then died 2 years later.

We reached out many times and he didn't want to talk.

It's okay to talk. It's okay not to be OK.  Even just talking about your struggles can be beneficial. Please don't keep it all inside.
Link Posted: 9/6/2023 5:24:15 PM EDT
[#14]
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Originally Posted By grinning_bob:


I sincerely wish you the best.  I know it is an old trope but it is also true --- everything heals with time. Your offer is interesting but you may be in a position where professional counseling is the best course of action. I hope I don't come off wrong and maybe there is someone here who is willing and able to listen.
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Nope, doesn't come across wrong. Thank you for caring
Link Posted: 9/10/2023 9:08:35 PM EDT
[#15]
I started going to Church in June 2023, and now I can say for sure, that decision saved my life.

Its never too late to start.
Link Posted: 9/15/2023 2:48:25 AM EDT
[Last Edit: AzzFaceKillah] [#16]
In need of a friend. I'm a good friend. Kill and burry type. Im lost. I've apparently made it my mission to drink my damnd self to death. Try as I might I'm not free. I want my mama to know that I'm free of it. I've done this before. She has done more than any human should allow.  I'm somewhat stable but I can see what's happening.
Link Posted: 9/15/2023 2:56:21 AM EDT
[#17]
You have to want help
I want help.
Link Posted: 9/15/2023 6:33:41 AM EDT
[Last Edit: Obo2] [#18]
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Originally Posted By AzzFaceKillah:
In need of a friend. I'm a good friend. Kill and burry type. Im lost. I've apparently made it my mission to drink my damnd self to death. Try as I might I'm not free. I want my mama to know that I'm free of it. I've done this before. She has done more than any human should allow.  I'm somewhat stable but I can see what's happening.
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I used the sinclair method and naltrexone to quit over 3 years ago now. I was a pretty heavy drinker. Started around 13 years old and kept going for 25 years or so.

I'll send you a link to a free e book, The Cure for Alcoholism by dr Roy Eskapa.

No rehab, no detox, you just take a pill before you drink. It's an opiate blocker so you don't get the euphoric high when you drink and your brain learns it doesn't get that reward.
When I taste a drink now it's like when I was 12 and it just tastes gross and I have no desire for it.

Link Posted: 9/17/2023 2:31:09 AM EDT
[#19]
Really don't know where to begin.
I have buried myself in video games so much over the last year as an escape and now that I am easing up I feel this crushing weight on me. I don't really have any friends (just trying to arrange my thoughts to type this is bringing tears to my eyes) I want to be normal so bad it hurts but instead I'm this monster.

I can make changes and make progress if I wasn't always so unbelievably stressed out and its eating me up inside.
I want a better life for me and my family but that crushing weight crushes the motivation right out of me. I used to have passion for things but I really don't anymore.

I won't even get started on my job, the bane of my fucking existence.
Link Posted: 9/17/2023 7:32:59 PM EDT
[Last Edit: Obo2] [#20]
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Originally Posted By TattooedScumbag:
Really don't know where to begin.
I have buried myself in video games so much over the last year as an escape and now that I am easing up I feel this crushing weight on me. I don't really have any friends (just trying to arrange my thoughts to type this is bringing tears to my eyes) I want to be normal so bad it hurts but instead I'm this monster.

I can make changes and make progress if I wasn't always so unbelievably stressed out and its eating me up inside.
I want a better life for me and my family but that crushing weight crushes the motivation right out of me. I used to have passion for things but I really don't anymore.

I won't even get started on my job, the bane of my fucking existence.
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I know those feels.
I'd turn to some of the wisdom of Jordan Peterson.
Sounds a little retarded but start with a simple win. Clean your room. This can be a metaphor or rather literal. You don't need to make order from chaos in your entire life but you can do so in the one little tiny corner of your house that you actually spend some time in and generally have total control over.

Maybe cleaning your whole room is too big of a step. Start by just putting the garbage or stuff that needs to be put in storage by the door and then take one piece out whenever you walk out of your room.

Is that too much for you? Ok just sit down and think about it and then focus on how it makes you feel and maybe talk to someone about those feelings.

I don't know what you mean by getting started on your job but if you need to find one go ahead and just print out your resume however it is now and go review it with someone. Is that too much for you? Just go open up the file on your computer. Is that too much? Just go sit at your computer and think about opening it. How does that make you feel? Talk to someone about it.

It also reminds me a bit of that movie what about Bob and even Dave ramseys method for getting out of crushing debt. Baby steps. Don't focus on all of it focus on the wins you can make, keep building momentum.

Of course I have been tending in the opposite approach. When I have a large project I feel a lot of anxiety over I bite off the largest most intimidating portion I don't even know how to do. Then the rest of it is all easy street. I would caution on this approach. You eat the elephant one bite at a time but if you start with too big of a bite you might just choke.

Good luck and God bless.
Link Posted: 10/13/2023 4:35:40 PM EDT
[#21]
Praying for you.
Link Posted: 10/13/2023 10:12:33 PM EDT
[#22]
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Originally Posted By Duradster:
Praying for you.
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Yes, and praying for all who venture to this thread.  Hope is a wonderful thing.
Link Posted: 10/16/2023 12:45:43 PM EDT
[Last Edit: Rick-OShay] [#23]
Never thought I'd be posting here.  One of my best friends is dying.  Another best friend is sick, and  living with us right now.  Wife says she loves me, but sure doesn't act like it.

I wish a runaway dump truck with bad brakes would just take me on out.
Link Posted: 10/16/2023 5:26:08 PM EDT
[#24]
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Originally Posted By Rick-OShay:
Never thought I'd be posting here.  One of my best friends is dying.  Another best friend is sick, and  living with us right now.  Wife says she loves me, but sure doesn't act like it.

I wish a runaway dump truck with bad brakes would just take me on out.
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Sorry to hear that Rick.  I hope things improve for you soon.  Sucks to be going through so much for sure.
Link Posted: 10/16/2023 6:04:06 PM EDT
[#25]
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Originally Posted By grinning_bob:


Sorry to hear that Rick.  I hope things improve for you soon.  Sucks to be going through so much for sure.
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Originally Posted By grinning_bob:
Originally Posted By Rick-OShay:
Never thought I'd be posting here.  One of my best friends is dying.  Another best friend is sick, and  living with us right now.  Wife says she loves me, but sure doesn't act like it.

I wish a runaway dump truck with bad brakes would just take me on out.


Sorry to hear that Rick.  I hope things improve for you soon.  Sucks to be going through so much for sure.



Thanks.  Just feel over-loaded.
Link Posted: 10/17/2023 12:26:04 AM EDT
[#26]
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Originally Posted By BTccw:

As men we often jump to the worst case scenario and camp there. Our "camp"  turns into a shed, then a more permanent structure...with a shop!  Often our fears actually never materialize.
Would you and your wife consider counseling?  I'm not talking Bear your souls kind of stuff... something like; "hey, we are not on the same page with some things, can you(counselor) help us (give us some different tools) to help us get back together so we can both be our best with each other?  
I would tell you from experience do whatever you can to avoid divorce but I'm not in your shoes either.
Prayers for you brother.
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Originally Posted By BTccw:
Originally Posted By Cole2534:
My wife is my biggest stressor.  I'd love to leave, but Im not ready to quit.  If I don't exhaust all efforts I'll just have another downer thing around my neck.  She espouses to care about me and love me, and I think she does to an extent, but she neglects me in the most important of ways.

I'm being laid off in 6wks.  No real worries there, but it is entirely possible I'll spend the holidays in divorce court and looking for a new home.

I don't know what to do about my dogs.  On one hand, they are just animals.  On the other....no they are not.  

But being miserable when you know there's a way out, well that is no fun.

On the flip side.  Homeless, jobless and single, with a shop full of tools and a plenty of projects.  Well, that certainly isnt the end of the world.

As men we often jump to the worst case scenario and camp there. Our "camp"  turns into a shed, then a more permanent structure...with a shop!  Often our fears actually never materialize.
Would you and your wife consider counseling?  I'm not talking Bear your souls kind of stuff... something like; "hey, we are not on the same page with some things, can you(counselor) help us (give us some different tools) to help us get back together so we can both be our best with each other?  
I would tell you from experience do whatever you can to avoid divorce but I'm not in your shoes either.
Prayers for you brother.
Little over 2 years later and what a ride.

Wife and I are better than ever, went back to work for the same employer a year ago for about a 25% raise, bought up some really nice property along the way and got my CDL.

Those fears weren't realized, they were just a distraction.  Should someone read this, @BTccw was right!
Link Posted: 10/17/2023 10:56:32 AM EDT
[#27]
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Originally Posted By Cole2534:
Little over 2 years later and what a ride.

Wife and I are better than ever, went back to work for the same employer a year ago for about a 25% raise, bought up some really nice property along the way and got my CDL.

Those fears weren't realized, they were just a distraction.  Should someone read this, @BTccw was right!
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Originally Posted By Cole2534:
Originally Posted By BTccw:
Originally Posted By Cole2534:
My wife is my biggest stressor.  I'd love to leave, but Im not ready to quit.  If I don't exhaust all efforts I'll just have another downer thing around my neck.  She espouses to care about me and love me, and I think she does to an extent, but she neglects me in the most important of ways.

I'm being laid off in 6wks.  No real worries there, but it is entirely possible I'll spend the holidays in divorce court and looking for a new home.

I don't know what to do about my dogs.  On one hand, they are just animals.  On the other....no they are not.  

But being miserable when you know there's a way out, well that is no fun.

On the flip side.  Homeless, jobless and single, with a shop full of tools and a plenty of projects.  Well, that certainly isnt the end of the world.

As men we often jump to the worst case scenario and camp there. Our "camp"  turns into a shed, then a more permanent structure...with a shop!  Often our fears actually never materialize.
Would you and your wife consider counseling?  I'm not talking Bear your souls kind of stuff... something like; "hey, we are not on the same page with some things, can you(counselor) help us (give us some different tools) to help us get back together so we can both be our best with each other?  
I would tell you from experience do whatever you can to avoid divorce but I'm not in your shoes either.
Prayers for you brother.
Little over 2 years later and what a ride.

Wife and I are better than ever, went back to work for the same employer a year ago for about a 25% raise, bought up some really nice property along the way and got my CDL.

Those fears weren't realized, they were just a distraction.  Should someone read this, @BTccw was right!

In a thread that needs all the encouragement it can get that is some very good news!!! Thanks for the update. @Cole2534
Link Posted: 10/17/2023 7:35:26 PM EDT
[#28]
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Originally Posted By BTccw:

In a thread  world that needs all the encouragement it can get that is some very good news!!! Thanks for the update. @Cole2534
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Originally Posted By BTccw:
Originally Posted By Cole2534:
Originally Posted By BTccw:
Originally Posted By Cole2534:
My wife is my biggest stressor.  I'd love to leave, but Im not ready to quit.  If I don't exhaust all efforts I'll just have another downer thing around my neck.  She espouses to care about me and love me, and I think she does to an extent, but she neglects me in the most important of ways.

I'm being laid off in 6wks.  No real worries there, but it is entirely possible I'll spend the holidays in divorce court and looking for a new home.

I don't know what to do about my dogs.  On one hand, they are just animals.  On the other....no they are not.  

But being miserable when you know there's a way out, well that is no fun.

On the flip side.  Homeless, jobless and single, with a shop full of tools and a plenty of projects.  Well, that certainly isnt the end of the world.

As men we often jump to the worst case scenario and camp there. Our "camp"  turns into a shed, then a more permanent structure...with a shop!  Often our fears actually never materialize.
Would you and your wife consider counseling?  I'm not talking Bear your souls kind of stuff... something like; "hey, we are not on the same page with some things, can you(counselor) help us (give us some different tools) to help us get back together so we can both be our best with each other?  
I would tell you from experience do whatever you can to avoid divorce but I'm not in your shoes either.
Prayers for you brother.
Little over 2 years later and what a ride.

Wife and I are better than ever, went back to work for the same employer a year ago for about a 25% raise, bought up some really nice property along the way and got my CDL.

Those fears weren't realized, they were just a distraction.  Should someone read this, @BTccw was right!

In a thread  world that needs all the encouragement it can get that is some very good news!!! Thanks for the update. @Cole2534


Amen brother.  I had to make a slight edit above.  It can be hard out there right now with everything going on.  I appreciate and respect the guys (and maybe gals) who have the courage and wisdom to post here when things get rough.
Link Posted: 10/18/2023 8:56:10 PM EDT
[#29]
Time to check in. In many ways things are better. I’ve been moderately successful at keeping my mind right.  It seems like there’s always something wrong with me, though. It’s as if it’s a zero sum game where the better something goes, the worse something else goes. Or maybe I just refocus on the bad.

My resiliency is shit. Work has been shit. I’m getting snippy. I don’t bark at my people, that wouldn’t be self destructive enough, I’m barking UP the food chain. Like I want them to fire me so I don’t have to make a hard decision to quit. I want to quit cuz fuck them. I hope it’s inconvenient. I hope the customers I dealt with raise an eyebrow and say “Hmmm.” I’m sick of the non-stop overcommittments. I want to pass the torch, I’m tired.
I started not wearing my seatbelt about half the time, cuz maybe I’d get lucky. But of course my fucking wife dropped the life insurance she had on me. Dude at work got pancreatic cancer. Poor bastard, he’s a happy guy, too. Why couldn’t it be a miserable bastard like me? Right now I’d trade places with him in a heartbeat.

Jesus, my mind and priorities are fucked.
Link Posted: 10/20/2023 6:31:07 PM EDT
[Last Edit: chicken_rider] [#30]
A coworker died on his bike last night, 22 can’t say I was friends or he was a good tech but I’d still trade with him. Was his birthday. Just a kid riding at night. Like we all did. Maybe to fast maybe an animal crossing we’ll never know. Didn’t drink (I do) didn’t smoke (I do ) just feeling for his parents
Link Posted: 10/21/2023 1:26:16 AM EDT
[#31]
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Originally Posted By chicken_rider:
A coworker died on his bike last night, 22 can’t say I was friends or he was a good tech but I’d still trade with him. Was his birthday. Just a kid riding at night. Like we all did. Maybe to fast maybe an animal crossing we’ll never know. Didn’t drink (I do) didn’t smoke (I do ) just feeling for his parents
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Im just a fellow biker, so not giving professional advice, and hope my words dont cause you additional pain. Sounds like you may be feeling what they call "survivors guilt". I've personally lost a friend to something similar. Even though I wasnt there, kept replaying the scene in my mind. Nobody said how it happened, so imagined the circumstances as a way to cope. Having ridden with him before only added to the details my mind conjured up. And it replayed over and over. Like you say, animal crossed his path, or hitting his throttle in a turn when he should be braking, or a little too fast for the conditions. My concerns weren't self-centered about how I was dealing with his death, but rather how his parents & girlfriend were handling it.

I wasnt ever asked how I was doing. No one seemed to care how I felt losing a riding friend.

So how are you doing chicken_rider bro? I care enough about the way you are feeling to make this post, and want to know if my experience has any relevance? 22 years old on his fucking birthday is way too young. But we're both still here, and thats being true to ourselves. Remember him like I remember my friend, which happens all the time
Link Posted: 10/21/2023 9:54:16 AM EDT
[#32]
Link Posted: 10/24/2023 5:58:11 PM EDT
[Last Edit: Joaof10] [#33]
Hey Friend...

I went through almost everything...Panic attacks, Social Anxiety...Lost everything 2 Times, i mean everything...

Putted a bike Brake on my leg almost cutted the femural, a vein exploded on my brain the doctors thought that i was gona die with 18 years old, took and injetion on the hospital almost passed out with bad reactions...

I mean really Jesus Christ delivered me from all of it, social Anxiety incluided... Now i am ok...i am great...i cried to Jesus 4 years ago after 2/3 months Panic attacks were gone... Really Jesus Christ God...Can Help you he did it tons and tons and tons of other people



Remember i was just One like you, or i though no hope for me i am done! And he Did it!

Glory to God...Jesus is life, light, peace, love Jesus is amazing... I tried the best doctors and medications

When i am praying and also fasting i feel a great peace...amazing!

Anything i am here...


If anyone need a message ir help i am here

God bless you all
Link Posted: 10/28/2023 12:02:12 AM EDT
[#34]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History


Looks like that thread is moved or gone. Hope they the help they needed. Economy the way it is, more of us may be feeling that way soon.
Link Posted: 11/2/2023 2:33:15 AM EDT
[Last Edit: CarmelBytheSea] [#35]
Wrong thread
Link Posted: 11/2/2023 8:55:51 PM EDT
[Last Edit: flippflopped] [#36]
In the 90’s I took a job at the gas company working for my Uncle. He asked his old Marine buddy and former service man to come back part time just to train me. I learned so much from this man. Marine sniper in Korea, could fix any thing, didn’t know the word quit, etc.

I drive past his house every day and often think about stopping by to see him. Life is so crazy though, you know?

Today, we saw a bunch of deputies in his driveway on the way to our sons doctors appt. and found out this evening that he committed suicide. He was 91 years old.

I love you, Marvin. Thank you for making me into who I am today.


Life is not too crazy. Stop and say hi.

If you’re alone, depressed, sad…please tell someone.
Link Posted: 11/4/2023 6:57:59 AM EDT
[#37]
I am just an ordinary 49 year old, I never served and I am just a regular city worker who doesn’t make a lot of money but always makes it by, been married for 16 years and together for 21, with two amazing children, 7 and 11. They are my heart. My wife hit 40 and went nuts not knowing who she is and trying to be someone else, caught her cheating but she is doing therapy and honestly getting better with being mom again. It’s been a tough 10 months and while there is improvement last night she asked if she go out with people from work if I minded I said do whatever you feel you need to do, but it killed me and made me mad as hell! Talking has never been her thing in all these years and now even less and if I try it is silence, the sad thing is I love her more than life itself just like my kids. Before she went out she tried overdoing everything like laundry and cleaning which is strange. I couldn’t sleep and I looked at my kids and wondered without them what the fuck is my life worth at this point. I thought when I intially found out that it couldn’t get worse but the ups and downs are brutal. Not looking for pity I need to vent and therapy isn’t until Tuesday so I appreciate you all just listening. My kids are the only thing that keep me going and I don’t know how to keep this shit show from boiling over, I know god has a plan for me and I believe it but I don’t understand what are why. Life seems worthless and I don’t like this feeling! Anyway thank you for reading it helped me to write this out because I have no one else to talk to.
Link Posted: 11/4/2023 3:40:19 PM EDT
[#38]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By G-Lisch:
I am just an ordinary 49 year old, I never served and I am just a regular city worker who doesn’t make a lot of money but always makes it by, been married for 16 years and together for 21, with two amazing children, 7 and 11. They are my heart. My wife hit 40 and went nuts not knowing who she is and trying to be someone else, caught her cheating but she is doing therapy and honestly getting better with being mom again. It’s been a tough 10 months and while there is improvement last night she asked if she go out with people from work if I minded I said do whatever you feel you need to do, but it killed me and made me mad as hell! Talking has never been her thing in all these years and now even less and if I try it is silence, the sad thing is I love her more than life itself just like my kids. Before she went out she tried overdoing everything like laundry and cleaning which is strange. I couldn’t sleep and I looked at my kids and wondered without them what the fuck is my life worth at this point. I thought when I intially found out that it couldn’t get worse but the ups and downs are brutal. Not looking for pity I need to vent and therapy isn’t until Tuesday so I appreciate you all just listening. My kids are the only thing that keep me going and I don’t know how to keep this shit show from boiling over, I know god has a plan for me and I believe it but I don’t understand what are why. Life seems worthless and I don’t like this feeling! Anyway thank you for reading it helped me to write this out because I have no one else to talk to.
View Quote


Bro, from reading this I think you are ,and have been, handling this difficult situation very well. Kudos to you on trying to help your wife and for caring so much about your kids. It sounds good, too, that you are doing some therapy. I will be praying for you and your family, hang tough and try to stay close to God and continue to stay close to your kids. All the best...
Link Posted: 11/4/2023 6:07:27 PM EDT
[#39]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By EastWest:


Bro, from reading this I think you are ,and have been, handling this difficult situation very well. Kudos to you on trying to help your wife and for caring so much about your kids. It sounds good, too, that you are doing some therapy. I will be praying for you and your family, hang tough and try to stay close to God and continue to stay close to your kids. All the best...
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By EastWest:
Originally Posted By G-Lisch:
I am just an ordinary 49 year old, I never served and I am just a regular city worker who doesn’t make a lot of money but always makes it by, been married for 16 years and together for 21, with two amazing children, 7 and 11. They are my heart. My wife hit 40 and went nuts not knowing who she is and trying to be someone else, caught her cheating but she is doing therapy and honestly getting better with being mom again. It’s been a tough 10 months and while there is improvement last night she asked if she go out with people from work if I minded I said do whatever you feel you need to do, but it killed me and made me mad as hell! Talking has never been her thing in all these years and now even less and if I try it is silence, the sad thing is I love her more than life itself just like my kids. Before she went out she tried overdoing everything like laundry and cleaning which is strange. I couldn’t sleep and I looked at my kids and wondered without them what the fuck is my life worth at this point. I thought when I intially found out that it couldn’t get worse but the ups and downs are brutal. Not looking for pity I need to vent and therapy isn’t until Tuesday so I appreciate you all just listening. My kids are the only thing that keep me going and I don’t know how to keep this shit show from boiling over, I know god has a plan for me and I believe it but I don’t understand what are why. Life seems worthless and I don’t like this feeling! Anyway thank you for reading it helped me to write this out because I have no one else to talk to.


Bro, from reading this I think you are ,and have been, handling this difficult situation very well. Kudos to you on trying to help your wife and for caring so much about your kids. It sounds good, too, that you are doing some therapy. I will be praying for you and your family, hang tough and try to stay close to God and continue to stay close to your kids. All the best...



I appreciate your words I just don’t know how long I can do it , I never saw myself as a strong person and I don’t know what I would do if it was t for my kids, the sad thing is with everything she has put me through I love her more than when we met, I know I am an idiot but it’s hard to explain, and when she does certain things I don’t know if I can continue without her. Again I know I sound like an idiot but it’s what I feel
Link Posted: 11/4/2023 11:01:09 PM EDT
[#40]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By EastWest:


Bro, from reading this I think you are ,and have been, handling this difficult situation very well. Kudos to you on trying to help your wife and for caring so much about your kids. It sounds good, too, that you are doing some therapy. I will be praying for you and your family, hang tough and try to stay close to God and continue to stay close to your kids. All the best...
View Quote


Well said.  I will pray as well.  Good luck man.
Link Posted: 11/5/2023 12:52:54 AM EDT
[Last Edit: EastWest] [#41]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By G-Lisch:



I appreciate your words I just don’t know how long I can do it , I never saw myself as a strong person and I don’t know what I would do if it was t for my kids, the sad thing is with everything she has put me through I love her more than when we met, I know I am an idiot but it’s hard to explain, and when she does certain things I don’t know if I can continue without her. Again I know I sound like an idiot but it’s what I feel
View Quote


First off all, you are a strong person because of what you've been through and because you have the ability and candor to write about it online. None of that is easy.

You're not an idiot just because you are having to endure a difficult emotional situation. Remember your painful emotions are at their root, thoughts. And you are greater than these current thoughts.

Please think in terms of life being one day at a time. Also, that although you cannot control the behavior of others, you can, to whatever degree, manage your inner reactions to this situation. I realize that's easy for me to say however, I have gone through painful situations in my life. What helped me to wait the situation out was by being grateful for what was good in my life. Minimally, you have two great kids - such a wonderful blessing.

We're praying and rooting for you; best wishes for strength and light for you and your family.
 
Link Posted: 11/6/2023 12:07:37 PM EDT
[#42]
It starts to feel like a race backwards all the time.
Link Posted: 11/8/2023 11:38:12 PM EDT
[#43]
Not feeling terrible or anything just had a bad day at work. If anyone just wants to chat please reach out. Would love to bounce ideas and problems off of someone
Link Posted: 11/8/2023 11:51:34 PM EDT
[#44]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By Xcomp:
Not feeling terrible or anything just had a bad day at work. If anyone just wants to chat please reach out. Would love to bounce ideas and problems off of someone
View Quote


Good luck man. It will get better. Try to get a good nights  sleep. Prayers sent.
Link Posted: 11/9/2023 2:03:34 AM EDT
[#45]
Thank you sir, sun always comes up tomorrow. All that matters
Link Posted: 11/9/2023 10:20:11 PM EDT
[#46]
An ex gave me an STD and I had it a long time before I cured it. I developed a chronic nerve pain of the piriformis. After several years of pain medication and spending hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to cure it I was told it was incurable. I was put on a medication called cymbalta that caused suicidal thoughts as a side effect and ended up in the looney bin after telling my Doctor I couldn't stop thinking of killing myself. I cold turkeyed all my medication (fentynal patches, cymbalta and mental drugs) and went to a therapist. What got me out of that mental state was deciding to be in service to others and my community. I was never a religious person (actually quite the opposite) but I prayed for a way and eventually quit my contractor job for a much less lucrative job as a firefighter. It's helped me live with the constant pain. Definitely saying a prayer for you bro.
Link Posted: 11/13/2023 11:29:12 PM EDT
[#47]
I was fired from my job a few weeks ago and I felt this incredible weight taken off of me. I hated the job and not in the least bit interested in another one like it. Been working on cybersecurity stuff in hopes of a good change in life. I'm 48 and it's the first time I've ever been fired.

I feel great for a change, even though I'm unemployed. Staying pretty positive for a change.

Hope everyone is doing well
Link Posted: 11/14/2023 6:56:32 AM EDT
[#48]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By TattooedScumbag:
I was fired from my job a few weeks ago and I felt this incredible weight taken off of me. I hated the job and not in the least bit interested in another one like it. Been working on cybersecurity stuff in hopes of a good change in life. I'm 48 and it's the first time I've ever been fired.

I feel great for a change, even though I'm unemployed. Staying pretty positive for a change.

Hope everyone is doing well
View Quote


My only time was “laid off” when I was 23 single and my first apartment. I was terrified but in the end it took my life down interesting paths to meet people I wouldn’t have other wise. I always say it was one of the best things to happen to me.
Link Posted: 11/14/2023 2:55:49 PM EDT
[#49]
Please say a prayer for my friend.

He’s a veteran that has struggled for a long time with depression. He’s been through the wringer these past few years and is undergoing a very tough treatment that I worry has pushed him over the edge instead of helping.

He’s not speaking to his family and has holed up in a hotel somewhere. I’ve called and texted him on his work phone and he’s not replying. Hotel I’m guessing he’s at won’t tell me if he’s there of course.

I’ve been praying all morning and hope so much that he doesn’t do anything permanent.
Link Posted: 11/14/2023 10:07:56 PM EDT
[Last Edit: Ninjaman] [#50]
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Originally Posted By LedDuck:
Please say a prayer for my friend.

He's a veteran that has struggled for a long time with depression. He's been through the wringer these past few years and is undergoing a very tough treatment that I worry has pushed him over the edge instead of helping.

He's not speaking to his family and has holed up in a hotel somewhere. I've called and texted him on his work phone and he's not replying. Hotel I'm guessing he's at won't tell me if he's there of course.

I've been praying all morning and hope so much that he doesn't do anything permanent.
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Prayers sent for your friend.  Are you able to share what type of treatment it is?
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