Posted: 3/17/2011 10:15:20 PM EDT
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I need help
I'm trying to get into super high speed unit but I have to submit a bio and interview with a fucking really high ranking dude and I'm fuckin spooked! This is not the actual bio...but if u replace all the stupid shit with actual stuff that sounds kinda good then it's really what my bio looks like I'm really only looking for input on the layout and flow of the bio and maybe some of the content that should or should not be included ok if u can help great thanks...if not enjoy the etardedness Biography: Churrasco bio redacted |
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It reads like a guy who is treading water - just checking things off a list, going from one thing to another, responsible for this, assigned to that. It says nothing about accomplishments, measurable self-improvement, real impact and contribution. When I was done reading it I felt like it belonged to a Maytag repairman who got moved around from one office to another. |
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Quoted: I still don't get it? Wait, no this isn't an application for membership to lightfighter This is my actual bio that I must submit to an actual military unit where people actually do stuff that is pretty important you know what never mind I would work on the flow. The subjects just skip back and forth. How do you work on getting better from one experience to the next. |
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Quoted:
It reads like a guy who is treading water - just checking things off a list, going from one thing to another, responsible for this, assigned to that. It says nothing about accomplishments, measurable self-improvement, real impact and contribution. When I was done reading it I felt like it belonged to a Maytag repairman who got moved around from one office to another. Thank You that was exactly what I needed to hear...not was I was hoping but you're right...I havent done shit in the past ten years that im proud of and that's why i'm fucking spooked about this interview...i made some bad choices...did my best to achieve something but ended up with shit to show for it...i'm fucked |
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Quoted: Quoted: It reads like a guy who is treading water - just checking things off a list, going from one thing to another, responsible for this, assigned to that. It says nothing about accomplishments, measurable self-improvement, real impact and contribution. When I was done reading it I felt like it belonged to a Maytag repairman who got moved around from one office to another. Thank You that was exactly what I needed to hear...not was I was hoping but you're right...I havent done shit in the past ten years that im proud of and that's why i'm fucking spooked about this interview...i made some bad choices...did my best to achieve something but ended up with shit to show for it...i'm fucked Okay...look. I'm going to give you a hand with this. A bio is brief and to the point. It consists of highlights. Greater length doesn't help soft content. Think of it as having three core sections: The first introduces who you and what you have done in one summary sentence. That sentence stands alone. The second gives some details, highlights and milestones. The third wraps it up and leaves the reader with a conclusion and has a tone based in your past accomplishments with relevance to the future and either what you seek to do/become/accomplish - or how your skills/capabilities an impact the desired position/mission/market. Sit down and ask yourself this: What would someone who knows you well say your top two skills, top two personal strengths and the best way to leverage them towards this desired asignment? Write them down succinctly. Get to the point. Now use those as the basis for writing the second section. Then write the third - leveraging the prior section and showing relevance/value to the desired position. Then write the first part in ONE sentence. PM me a draft if you get stuck. |
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I still don't get it? Wait, no this isn't an application for membership to lightfighter This is my actual bio that I must submit to an actual military unit where people actually do stuff that is pretty important you know what never mind I would work on the flow. The subjects just skip back and forth. How do you work on getting better from one experience to the next. See that's my problem...everyone who knows me always tells me how I'm so lucky because I'm good at everything...physically, mentally I've always been able to knock down my target so to speak...but what has transpired is that I have quit trying new things because I get bored quickly...being able to accomplish anything makes nothing feel like an accomplishment and for a long time I have been a procrastinator and a lazy fuck...because I know I can get whatever I need to get done quickly and efficiently if I put my mind to it...I'm holding myself back...I think getting out of the military and trying to be a regular guy was a huge mistake and now I'm trying to pick up where I left off but everything I did 10 years ago seems meaningless now...I was a fucking super soldier...now I'm just an aging douchebag trying to make up for lost time...fuck me...i gotta get shit right this time. |
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Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: I still don't get it? Wait, no this isn't an application for membership to lightfighter This is my actual bio that I must submit to an actual military unit where people actually do stuff that is pretty important you know what never mind I would work on the flow. The subjects just skip back and forth. How do you work on getting better from one experience to the next. See that's my problem...everyone who knows me always tells me how I'm so lucky because I'm good at everything...physically, mentally I've always been able to knock down my target so to speak...but what has transpired is that I have quit trying new things because I get bored quickly...being able to accomplish anything makes nothing feel like an accomplishment and for a long time I have been a procrastinator and a lazy fuck...because I know I can get whatever I need to get done quickly and efficiently if I put my mind to it...I'm holding myself back...I think getting out of the military and trying to be a regular guy was a huge mistake and now I'm trying to pick up where I left off but everything I did 10 years ago seems meaningless now...I was a fucking super soldier...now I'm just an aging douchebag trying to make up for lost time...fuck me...i gotta get shit right this time. Listen to CWO above, he's got great advice. Good luck |