[ARCHIVED THREAD] - x-girlfriend (Page 1 of 2)
Posted: 5/11/2002 11:49:22 PM EDT
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my ex girlfriend just called me out of the blue. she wants to hang out. what the fu*k. should i allow this? or should i actually listen to what my brain is saying for once and stay the hell away. she really hurt me when we broke up... but i still miss her. why must life mix pain with pleasure so seamlessly... i dunno. just wondering what you guys would do since you are sober and im not. |
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i like what imho said. if her intentions are sincere, there is no need for you to rush things. you could be friendly and polite and even give this some time to develop and determine what her intentions are. i think you should talk to her in a friendly and polite manner, but not hang out with her until she showed she deserved your company. also, don't bring up anything about the past at this point. there will be time for that in the future if you become close enough friends. any new freindship should be built from scratch..and for the right reasons. good luck. |
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Man, I've experienced this before! She's contacted you because you're her "fall-back" guy. Apparently the guy she was messing around with dusted her off and she needs a little security. But be warned, as soon as she finds someone else, and she will because she'll never stop looking, she'll drop you as quickly as she contacted you. If you're content playing the patsy every time she feels insecure with herself, then go for it. But you'll only end up getting burned again. Believe me. Personally, what I'd do is tell her anything she wants to hear to get her into bed. Knock that booty a couple of times and then, when your finished tell her to get the fu-k out. MIerinMD |
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A post them so we can see them. :) Actually, I had an ex-gf that did this to me. But, I had moved on in my mind by then. It had been 2 years since we had talked. A year after she came back, I got married to a wonderful lady and if the ex could have made it from Texas to Michigan, she was going to be in our wedding. She and my wife are good friends. So, my advice is, subtly check out her intent. If you're the fallback guy as was earlier suggested, get her in the sack and have as much fun as you can while it lasts. When she dumps you again, you'll be prepared and not hurt. If she comes back again someday. Repeat as necessary. One of these days, she's going to have a guilt complex over how she treated you. And nothing you could say to her now will come anywhere close to how bad she's going to feel then. :) misanthrope747 |
| Sounds like she's the kind that wants what she can't have so she gets crazy for a guy who leaves her. If you do a hit-and-run she's gonna be all over you like stink on sh*t. This is a power play option. Consider your next move very carefully. She's a loser for a partner. |
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Quoted: my ex girlfriend just called me out of the blue. she wants to hang out. what the fu*k. should i allow this? or should i actually listen to what my brain is saying for once and stay the hell away. she really hurt me when we broke up... but i still miss her. How long has it been? Did she play "mind games"? Was it love, or lust? You must ask yourself these questions, and then do what your brain tells you. why must life mix pain with pleasure so seamlessly... i dunno. just wondering what you guys would do since you are sober and im not. |
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Be the bastard I have become.....thread on familiar ground and then dump her. Either that or just don't invite her over, keep the initiative and don't be the backup for times when SHE feel lonely and hurting. For some reason women(risking painting with a wide brush here) always think they can keep you as a friend after a relationship ends, and suckers as we are we still hope for reconciliation whenever she comes over and end up with multiple fracture of our hearts when she finishes with your finest bottle of wine and leaves. [i]now does that sound like advise you expected from the forum staff? No, just advice of a guy who has been there, done that and has the T-shirt[/i] |
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Hit and run buddy, hit and run. Just consider that a bit of consolation for the pain you went through before. But don't get serious with her, if it didn't work last time, it probably wasn't meant to be and won't this time. Bang her and tell her to leave some breakfast on the table and be the hell gone. Mike |
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well...you could...go out with her again...while you are out together, stop in by a gun shop....say how much it would mean to you if you could have that beautiful AR hanging on the gun shop wall and that you need some cash.......... ...tell her it isn't working out and take your new AR to the range with some friends.[;D] Just kidding... If you have to ask if it is a good thing or a bad thing to go out again with this girl, it's probably a bad thing. [b]ArmaLiter[/b] |
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wow guys, i guess this is a touchy subject for a lot of us isnt it. yea, im sober now, and i know pretty much 98% for sure that i AM some sort of fall back for her. from what i hear she just broke up with some other poor sucker. you all have excellent advice, and i can tell many of you have been there/done that. i really wish i was bitter enough at this girl to bang her and leave her, and i guess part of me is, but im not gonna sink to her level. she hurt me quite a bit, but since i am not really the vengeful type i think the best revenge i could muster would be to politely blow her off. maybe someday she will regret her stupidity (yeah, right) and become a better person. then again there is a good chance that despite all my best efforts she will suck me right back in. im only human and i dont know if i mentioned it, but she is a little hottie. holy shit. i dont even want to think about it. i mean its not like i always have girls like this all over me. i wish i had the luxury not to need her. it is the beautiful ones that hurt the most. i think it is a rule somewhere that the more enjoyable something is, the worse it is for you. like fast food and gasoline fumes. oh well thanks for the support guys -Spaceman p.s.- i like the "grudge fuck" idea Tondog. that sounds like fun. |
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If you do see her, remember that one of you two will be played by the other. She will probably come on with your a good friend routine while wearing a low cut shirt, just teasing you. Followed by other suggestive moves making you want it more and more. Then she will say she doesn't want to rush into anything until you finally, just turning you into putty in her hands. Then she will take was she wants and walk all over you in the morning. But hey, if you like being sloppy seconds everytime she dumps a loser, that's up to you. I agree with everyone else. Nail her and kick her to the curb. Unless of course you could get the sex buddies thing to work. |
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Quoted: wow guys, i guess this is a touchy subject for a lot of us isnt it. yea, im sober now, and i know pretty much 98% for sure that i AM some sort of fall back for her. from what i hear she just broke up with some other poor sucker. you all have excellent advice, and i can tell many of you have been there/done that. i really wish i was bitter enough at this girl to bang her and leave her, and i guess part of me is, but im not gonna sink to her level. she hurt me quite a bit, but since i am not really the vengeful type i think the best revenge i could muster would be to politely blow her off. maybe someday she will regret her stupidity (yeah, right) and become a better person. then again there is a good chance that despite all my best efforts she will suck me right back in. im only human and i dont know if i mentioned it, but she is a little hottie. holy shit. i dont even want to think about it. i mean its not like i always have girls like this all over me. i wish i had the luxury not to need her. it is the beautiful ones that hurt the most. i think it is a rule somewhere that the more enjoyable something is, the worse it is for you. like fast food and gasoline fumes. oh well thanks for the support guys -Spaceman p.s.- i like the "grudge fuck" idea Tondog. that sounds like fun. Thatta boy. Throw in a few sutble, demeaning rips in your conversation. After you have tactfully blown her off, hang-up. Have a beer and & a smile. [i][b]. im only human and i dont know if i mentioned it, but she is a little hottie. holy shit. i dont even want to think about it. [/i][/b] I'm with ya. Exactly the thoughts which plaque my mind. I hafta go to a dinner party tonight. God, I hope she is not there for she is friends with the host (I introduced them in the past). I should have asked but, I always have to front to people that I am emotionally invinceable. |
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Quoted: dear brokenhearted, [b]take her back. have sex. lots of times. take pictures of you and her at it. take pics of her naked. take pics of her giving you head. take more pics. then when she screws you over, post it on the internet. [/b] with love, uncle redray i think you take the cake for bitterness! |
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Quoted: she hurt me quite a bit, but since i am not really the vengeful type i think the best revenge i could muster would be to politely blow her off. maybe someday she will regret her stupidity (yeah, right) and become a better person. I've done the "polite" blow off before, I regret it everyday! She deserved to be totally humiliated and emotionally destroyed for how she treated me. Then to come back and try to do it again.... Man, don't miss out on prime opportunity! You'll be kicking yourself everyday! |
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Quoted: It looks like you're a few steps ahead of me. I'm still trying to get my ex to move out of my house! I've been a real asshole to her lately and she is finally starting to pack up her shit. Man, that sucks. I've had to deal with that before.... BTW: Your signature scares me! [:D] |
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Quoted: The "Can we still be friends" thing NEVER works! Why do chicks always want to try that crap? Guys NEVER try the "still be friends" crap, we know better! I gotta throw the bullshit flag down on that one.... my last two ex-boyfriends wanted to do the "let's be friends" thing. I was the one who said that idea was a no-go. In fact, one of them I told, in no uncertain terms, that I never wanted to hear from him again. He still IM's me from time to time. Dumb ass. [rolleyes] |