There is a reason that only pickles made in the traditional way (fermentation in a salt brine) can be labeled as "genuine"; while others can't be (they usually use the term "fresh pack" which is a euphemism for "not genuine"). BTW, I'm speaking specifically of dill and/or sour pickles. I don't know if the concept of "genuine" is even applicable to weird pickles like "bread and butter pickles" or "mustard pickles".

http://www.wisementrading.com/foodpreserving/harsch_crocks.htm

 Priceless

What are you, the pickle police?  Pickles come in many varieties, they're all "genuine."  The OP didn't even ask about anything specifically related to pickles, or their history; just what to do with extra cucumbers.



My pickles are easy to make, delicious, and get rid of your excess cucumbers.  I don't care if you approve, or think they're "real."





 

I didn't define the terms.



No, they're not.

"The old-fashioned way of making dill pickles, fermenting cucumbers in a salt-brine, produces the type of dill pickle commercial picklers call a "genuine dill pickle." While you preserve most other kinds of pickles by using acetic acid present in vinegar, this type of dill pickle is preserved by lactic acid produced during a fermentation process that takes place over several weeks."

A similar thing applies to cheese. Something like Kraft Singles may colloquially be referred to as cheese, but it is actually "processed cheese" (AKA: "cheese food").



I was addressing your "super easy" claim about making "pickles". Using shortcut methods that result in something that is not genuine often is "easy". I was pointing out that while it may be easy to make pickles using the time-saving "fresh pack" method, it is not easy to make genuine pickles. I also pointed out that genuine pickles taste very different than "fresh pack" pickles, and that a lot of people have never even had them; and may be worth trying some.

Slice.  Slice onions too.
Put both in vinegar with black pepper.
Chill and eat.



Chop.  Mix with plain yoghurt, Mint and black pepper.
Serve on top of grilled or roast meat and as a salad dressing.

Cut into sticks.  Chill.   Eat.

Pickles.

Dildos

Core and stuff with spicy tuna like a sushi roll.
Slice and eat.

Eat, plain while drinking  REALLY cold Hendricks Gin.

Chop.  Put in Gazpachio.

Slice thin.  Make sammiches with dill, cream cheese, capers and bread with the crust cut off.  Impress hoidy toidy ladies.  

Slice really thin.  Arrange in layers to make sculptured animals.  Drizzle with an oil based sauce that has lots of strong flavors.  Eat the animals as a salad.

Throw at people that piss you off.

Mrs. Woermer. "Cucumbers are sensuous".

They make damn good ammo for tater guns!

Fuck me

Tier 1 pickles

I'm very surprised and relieved that this thread turned out the way it has.

No shit.  Fucking know-it-alls make me not want to offer any advice.  

I normally don't let GD bother me, but being talked to like a child by someone who is full of shit, pisses me the fuck off.  Fuck this.





 

Pickle snobbery.  Wow.



You introduced "genuine" into the discussion.  Prior to that, we were all just talking about how to dispose of some surplus cucumbers.



I don't think the OP is planning to can and market any pickles he might make on a commercial scale, so I don't think that any crazy food industry standards for "genuine" pickles really apply.



"Genuine" pickles might be great, but you've elevated the pickle argument to beans vs. no beans heights in a single thread.







 

Let's get this thread back on track You can make some nice hors d' oeuvres by slicing them thick, about 3/4 to 1 inch, hollowing the center with a spoon, or better yet, a melon baller, and filling it with  pretty much anything you think would taste good. My personal favorites are a nice crab salad, with lemon and dill, or a "mousse" made with chopped shrimp, roasted garlic, and cream cheese. Give it a try

First you need to oil one.