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Posted: 8/20/2010 11:16:06 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/20/2010 11:16:49 PM EDT by Danj]
One them is barely in high school. The most completely idiotic stuff comes out her mouth. First I had to listen to her tell me about how her now exBF cheated on her by getting a BJ from someone else. Her ex BF's name is Chase so she says she feels bad whenever she sees a credit card, debit card, or bank bearing that name. Then she told me that her dog died after it had diarrhea. Can you talk about too much information?

Meanwhile another employee was constantly asking fellow employees to help him ring stuff up and how do do stuff. He would then apologize to the customers and tell them that it is his first day. He is seriously racking up the tips.

About a half an hour later two of my other employees were laughing their asses off. They seem to have somehow got access to the first employee's facebook account. They posted a status message as "xxxx is giving head." There were a ton of people leaving comments about this status message. Many of them were her friends, and some of them were her family members including her mom.
Link Posted: 8/20/2010 11:17:38 PM EDT
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.
Link Posted: 8/20/2010 11:20:25 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2010 11:24:39 PM EDT
Sounds like GD in person. As if you didn't get enough of ARF already
Link Posted: 8/20/2010 11:27:58 PM EDT

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.
Link Posted: 8/20/2010 11:30:47 PM EDT
Haha yeah teenagers are so stupid, but funny.
Link Posted: 8/20/2010 11:38:23 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.


That was awsome.
Link Posted: 8/20/2010 11:40:25 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.

Good one for a foreigner...

Many of them do not realize how hamstrung American police are, compared to back home...
Link Posted: 8/20/2010 11:43:50 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Dave_A:

Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.

Good one for a foreigner...

Many of them do not realize how hamstrung American police are, compared to back home...


Probably thought a rubber hose was waiting for him out back.
Link Posted: 8/20/2010 11:47:48 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.

Oh, he needs to be introduced to the photocopier "lie detector". Every time you push the button a copy comes out that says "HE'S LYING".



Link Posted: 8/21/2010 2:54:44 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Dumpster_Baby:

Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.

Oh, he needs to be introduced to the photocopier "lie detector". Every time you push the button a copy comes out that says "HE'S LYING".





We did that about 5 years ago with an intern. Pre Printed the "LIE" and "TRUTH" statements in about 72 point font then put each in their own paper bins one and two, (faced down). Made the "suspect put his hand on the glass (told him it could read his blood flow and persperation along with his heart rate and blood pressure.

Then we had fun Fun FUN with the "intern interrogation".


MING the Merciless
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 4:09:13 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Ming_The_Merciless:
Originally Posted By Dumpster_Baby:

Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.

Oh, he needs to be introduced to the photocopier "lie detector". Every time you push the button a copy comes out that says "HE'S LYING".





We did that about 5 years ago with an intern. Pre Printed the "LIE" and "TRUTH" statements in about 72 point font then put each in their own paper bins one and two, (faced down). Made the "suspect put his hand on the glass (told him it could read his blood flow and persperation along with his heart rate and blood pressure.

Then we had fun Fun FUN with the "intern interrogation".


MING the Merciless


That is the funniest thing I have read on here
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 4:45:25 AM EDT
Originally Posted By jeep450:
Originally Posted By Ming_The_Merciless:
Originally Posted By Dumpster_Baby:

Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.

Oh, he needs to be introduced to the photocopier "lie detector". Every time you push the button a copy comes out that says "HE'S LYING".





We did that about 5 years ago with an intern. Pre Printed the "LIE" and "TRUTH" statements in about 72 point font then put each in their own paper bins one and two, (faced down). Made the "suspect put his hand on the glass (told him it could read his blood flow and persperation along with his heart rate and blood pressure.

Then we had fun Fun FUN with the "intern interrogation".


MING the Merciless


That is the funniest thing I have read on here


Nothing better than GD on a slow Saturday at work.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 4:51:54 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/21/2010 4:52:23 AM EDT by AirRaceFan]
At first I'm

Then I'm like as many employers seem to prefer hiring stupid asses like this and putting up with their antics and risking customer ire than hiring older, experienced, mature unemployed workers for fear they might leave when/if they find a better job.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 5:00:15 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Ming_The_Merciless:
Originally Posted By Dumpster_Baby:

Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.

Oh, he needs to be introduced to the photocopier "lie detector". Every time you push the button a copy comes out that says "HE'S LYING".





We did that about 5 years ago with an intern. Pre Printed the "LIE" and "TRUTH" statements in about 72 point font then put each in their own paper bins one and two, (faced down). Made the "suspect put his hand on the glass (told him it could read his blood flow and persperation along with his heart rate and blood pressure.

Then we had fun Fun FUN with the "intern interrogation".


MING the Merciless



Fricken hilarious
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 6:41:13 AM EDT

Originally Posted By AirRaceFan:
At first I'm

Then I'm like as many employers seem to prefer hiring stupid asses like this and putting up with their antics and risking customer ire than hiring older, experienced, mature unemployed workers for fear they might leave when/if they find a better job.

I'm 40, and I'd like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 6:46:43 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 7:03:42 AM EDT
Originally Posted By travk1234:
Sounds like GD in person. As if you didn't get enough of ARF already


Nailed it. Newsflash, people talk about stupid shit quite frequently.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 7:51:52 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Zhukov:
What kind of business?
Retail food business.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 8:27:44 PM EDT
I only have one teenager working for me, he's 19 and a year out of HS. Damn good kid, learns quick, practically fearless and surprisingly trustworthy but JESUS some of the shit that comes out of his mouth if he's just talking blows my mind.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 8:28:13 PM EDT

Originally Posted By AirRaceFan:
At first I'm

Then I'm like as many employers seem to prefer hiring stupid asses like this and putting up with their antics and risking customer ire than hiring older, experienced, mature unemployed workers for fear they might leave when/if they find a better job.

As if the kids won't leave the job when school starts or a better job comes along. Or just for the heck of it.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 8:35:00 PM EDT

Originally Posted By slodsm:
I only have one teenager working for me, he's 19 and a year out of HS. Damn good kid, learns quick, practically fearless and surprisingly trustworthy but JESUS some of the shit that comes out of his mouth if he's just talking blows my mind.


Examples needed.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 8:40:20 PM EDT
Yep used to have to manage about 6 16-18 year old chowder heads
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 8:43:01 PM EDT
I like this thread.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 8:44:16 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Ming_The_Merciless:
Originally Posted By Dumpster_Baby:

Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.

Oh, he needs to be introduced to the photocopier "lie detector". Every time you push the button a copy comes out that says "HE'S LYING".





We did that about 5 years ago with an intern. Pre Printed the "LIE" and "TRUTH" statements in about 72 point font then put each in their own paper bins one and two, (faced down). Made the "suspect put his hand on the glass (told him it could read his blood flow and persperation along with his heart rate and blood pressure.

Then we had fun Fun FUN with the "intern interrogation".


MING the Merciless


They did this on an old episode of Law and Order.
Link Posted: 8/21/2010 8:49:40 PM EDT
I demand pictures of the girl. Only if she is 18 or over.




















Or just looks it
Link Posted: 8/22/2010 7:31:51 PM EDT

Originally Posted By rasanders22:
I demand pictures of the girl. Only if she is 18 or over.
Or just looks it

It's funny because she could probably pass for 18, and she is only 14. It's just the stupid stuff she says makes me think she is 10.
Link Posted: 8/22/2010 7:36:50 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Danj:
One them is barely in high school. The most completely idiotic stuff comes out her mouth. First I had to listen to her tell me about how her now exBF cheated on her by getting a BJ from someone else. Her ex BF's name is Chase so she says she feels bad whenever she sees a credit card, debit card, or bank bearing that name. Then she told me that her dog died after it had diarrhea. Can you talk about too much information?

Meanwhile another employee was constantly asking fellow employees to help him ring stuff up and how do do stuff. He would then apologize to the customers and tell them that it is his first day. He is seriously racking up the tips.

About a half an hour later two of my other employees were laughing their asses off. They seem to have somehow got access to the first employee's facebook account. They posted a status message as "xxxx is giving head." There were a ton of people leaving comments about this status message. Many of them were her friends, and some of them were her family members including her mom.


Go ahead and save yourself a headache and fire employee 1.

Link Posted: 8/22/2010 8:39:11 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Mattl:
Originally Posted By Danj:
One them is barely in high school. The most completely idiotic stuff comes out her mouth. First I had to listen to her tell me about how her now exBF cheated on her by getting a BJ from someone else. Her ex BF's name is Chase so she says she feels bad whenever she sees a credit card, debit card, or bank bearing that name. Then she told me that her dog died after it had diarrhea. Can you talk about too much information?

Meanwhile another employee was constantly asking fellow employees to help him ring stuff up and how do do stuff. He would then apologize to the customers and tell them that it is his first day. He is seriously racking up the tips.

About a half an hour later two of my other employees were laughing their asses off. They seem to have somehow got access to the first employee's facebook account. They posted a status message as "xxxx is giving head." There were a ton of people leaving comments about this status message. Many of them were her friends, and some of them were her family members including her mom.


Go ahead and save yourself a headache and fire employee 1.


She is moving to South America in September.
Link Posted: 8/22/2010 9:21:42 PM EDT
Tell the girl if she gave u a BJ it would really get back at her ex.
Link Posted: 8/22/2010 9:27:21 PM EDT
D*mn, could we have been that stupid ourselves when we were teens? In my days, you never aired your dirty laundry and no one would even consider posting anything personal about themselves for the world to examine. Yet today's teenagers are deep into myspace or facebook or some other interweb lookatme data site.
Link Posted: 8/22/2010 9:31:20 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Dave_A:

Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By marksman121:
Sounds like a chance to play some great pranks on them.

I have a college student from Russia working for us for the summer. He is kind of an arrogant dick and does not like the fact that females are above him in the chain of authority. He decided to yell at a girl who had been working for me for four years.

We have high school and college aged "parking enforcement agents" that work in my town in the summer. They don't carry a gun or any police powers but they do wear an official looking uniform and have a badge. About two hours after I got the argument under control I got one of the "parking enforcement agents" to come into my store and pull the Russian kid aside. He told him he was working on an important case and the kid was main suspect in a recent robbery. The employee just about shit his pants and presented the meter maid his Russian ID, his passport, and his working papers. Then the "parking enforcement agent" pretend to run his documents and then just laughed at him. We had to explain to the kid it was a joke. He did not think it was funny.

Good one for a foreigner...

Many of them do not realize how hamstrung American police are, compared to back home...

Those pesky civil rights. They'll hamstring you every time.
Link Posted: 8/22/2010 9:33:24 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By Zhukov:
What kind of business?
Retail food business.


You said they get tips so that rules out Taco Bell.

Pizza Hut?
Link Posted: 8/22/2010 9:34:13 PM EDT

Originally Posted By uglygun:
Originally Posted By Danj:

Originally Posted By Zhukov:
What kind of business?
Retail food business.

You said they get tips so that rules out Taco Bell.

Pizza Hut?
Nope it's my parents place a mom and pop non franchise business.

Link Posted: 8/23/2010 9:17:25 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/23/2010 9:26:09 AM EDT

Originally Posted By MortimerS:
Tell the girl if she gave u a BJ it would really get back at her ex.

She's fourteen fucking years old, dude....
Link Posted: 8/25/2010 7:30:43 PM EDT
So tonight they changed her status message to "had bad Mexican food, shitting my brains out."
Link Posted: 8/25/2010 7:40:39 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Danj:
One them is barely in high school. The most completely idiotic stuff comes out her mouth. First I had to listen to her tell me about how her now exBF cheated on her by getting a BJ from someone else. Her ex BF's name is Chase so she says she feels bad whenever she sees a credit card, debit card, or bank bearing that name. Then she told me that her dog died after it had diarrhea. Can you talk about too much information?

Meanwhile another employee was constantly asking fellow employees to help him ring stuff up and how do do stuff. He would then apologize to the customers and tell them that it is his first day. He is seriously racking up the tips.

About a half an hour later two of my other employees were laughing their asses off. They seem to have somehow got access to the first employee's facebook account. They posted a status message as "xxxx is giving head." There were a ton of people leaving comments about this status message. Many of them were her friends, and some of them were her family members including her mom.

dude I work part time as a pizza delivery driver. I'm one of the oldest employees. its like being in a living hell. most of the employees are pot smoking 20 somethings with no ambition, no drive, no intelligence, no sense of direction, little education and even less maturity. its worse than being in high school.
they act like their ridiculously pathetic lives are of the most important thing in the world to everyone around them. seriously its fucking driving me insane. its like someone reciting their facebook postings to a captive audience. its like nails on a chalkboard to my soul. I nearly had a break down about it saturday. I had one of them just going on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on till finally I told her I just didn't care.
Link Posted: 8/25/2010 7:41:16 PM EDT
The retail food business can be a great place to work as a teenager...especially when you close at night with the hot waitress...:)
Link Posted: 8/25/2010 7:48:15 PM EDT
Tag for more stories.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile
Link Posted: 8/25/2010 7:53:37 PM EDT

Originally Posted By SouthEndXGF:
Tag for more stories.

Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile


Link Posted: 8/25/2010 8:31:58 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/25/2010 8:35:41 PM EDT by Danj]
So on Monday one of my employees came in to work all cut up and bruised. He told me he got black out drunk the night before and remembers nothing. His friends told him he decided to ride his long board. His shoelace got tangled in one of the wheels and he fell down a hill. I swear he got brain damage when he did this. This is the same kid who failed four regence tests (state final tests) which is practically unheard of. To top it off his dad is the superintendent of my local school district. He has mysteriously lost about fifty pounds in the last couple of months, he is almost rail thin. He spent just about two hours staring at the wall and petting his hair. He also always has mysterious nose bleeds. He admits to only doing pot.


Originally Posted By shadows:
The retail food business can be a great place to work as a teenager...especially when you close at night with the hot waitress...:)
Not for me. My parents own the place, so no shitting where my family eats.

ETA: The worst part about teenage employees is that they tell you everything, including their family lives. It's sad listening to them tell you about their family life including, alcoholic, criminal, and just plain shitty parents.


Link Posted: 8/25/2010 8:56:02 PM EDT
Only story I had was 2 18 year olds trying to figure out how to fill a paintball gun air tank off of the big CO2 cylinder

they were like monkeys fucking a football and I told um to be careful as to not launch a A Team missile
they looked at me and asked WTF is a A Team

I felt really old at that point
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 7:43:23 PM EDT
Talk about too much information.

So apparently one of my female employees who has been working for us for about four years has a kid. She kept it secret from us, we had absolutely no idea. Another female employee who couldn't keep her mouth shut told me. The girl is barely 17 and had the kid when she was 16 over the winter. The father is 21, can barely speak english, never graduated from high school, and is a landscaper.
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 8:13:24 PM EDT
Yeh, laugh all you want, monkey-boy - For the next 20 years of their lives, most of them will be voting Democrat...
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 8:25:24 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Skibane:
Yeh, laugh all you want, monkey-boy - For the next 20 years of their lives, most of them will be voting Democrat...

I've converted a few.
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 8:56:46 PM EDT
I'm a customer who frequently employs the "Lights on, anyone home?" test. This test is best applied when I have a choice of what establishment employee I will interact with. Usually, this is with cashiers at checkout.

Here's how it works:

If their mouth is hanging open in such a manner that it appears a necessary act in order to breathe - possibly because they jammed something up both nostrils - I will assume that the individual is going to look at my bunch of cilantro and ring it up as radishes.

If, while not presently occupied, the individual seems to be "in another world" and listlessly staring off into space, I will assume that the individual is hearing Led Zeppelin and will perceive me as a member of the well-known Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band.

If, while checking out a customer, their hands very precisely retrieve item after item from the conveyor belt, flawlessly scan each bar-code, and bag each item with a Tetris Champion-like grace, but never blinks, says a word, or breaks eye contact with the customer, I will assume that they will be ending my life with the blunted end of a ball-point pen.

The most common offenders of these aforementioned three?

People who look like they're college students.

Although, the high schoolers tend to fall into three categories, too:

1) Overly peppy –– "Good morning, my fellow man! Were you able to acquire all which you sought? Shall that be paper or plastic, good sir!?"
–––––– And that's the guys –– the girls in this category act like their morning coffee contained 17 shots of espresso, a pound of sugar, and three hits of speed.

2) Awkwardly bumbling –– "Oh, uh, hey sorry about this, but I accidentally scanned this item twice. Sorry, I'm completely new at this. Let me page a manager to help me void this out for you..."

3) A damn fine hire.

_MaH
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 9:02:20 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/29/2010 9:02:52 PM EDT by AKSig]
I currently manage 9 16-18 year olds out of my staff of 42.

It is hilarious and downright scary at the same time to hear the stupid shit that comes out of some of their mouths.

Although a few of them are really great workers.
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 9:13:43 PM EDT
We have quite a few Hispanic employees. There seems to be a cycle of teenage pregnancy, and lack of education which results in poverty in our Hispanic community. I thought this girl that got knocked up was on her way out of the cycle as she was doing good in school and was a good employee. Guess not.
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 9:14:54 PM EDT
Originally Posted By www-glock19-com:
Only story I had was 2 18 year olds trying to figure out how to fill a paintball gun air tank off of the big CO2 cylinder

they were like monkeys fucking a football and I told um to be careful as to not launch a A Team missile
they looked at me and asked WTF is a A Team

I felt really old at that point


alcoholics anonymous has a team?!
Link Posted: 8/31/2010 7:26:51 PM EDT
OMFG I just spent an entire slow evening listening to more tales about being in love, being in high school, breaking with high school boyfriends, dogs eating chocolate, getting fat, shopping, and throwing dogs in the pool. The best story was how her dad got in a car accident when he "saw a deer and hit the breaks and skidded into a tree" at two am in the morning. She told me her dad called her neighbor first and insurance didn't cover the accident. I hinted that her dad might have been extremely drunk and that's why the accident was never reported, the insurance never covered it and the cops didn't get called. I think I crushed her world.

And right now she is telling me how when fat people come in she gives them less food and skinny people more.
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