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Posted: 9/3/2005 2:28:00 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 2:43:23 PM EDT by JBravo223]
about five minutes ago two guys, claiming to be with the "Church of Jesus Christ" came knocking at my door. I didn't really give them much time to talk, telling them that I had already been to church today. I was a little nervous and didn't have a firearm within reach.

They looked really shady though. And I live in an apt building, so I'm not sure how they got in. I had a really funny feeling about these two.

Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:32:00 PM EDT
the obligatory...

Draw down.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:32:59 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Max_Mike:
the obligatory...

Draw down.



+1
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:36:54 PM EDT
You're not being paranoid if they are out to get you.

Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:37:04 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 2:46:04 PM EDT by JBravo223]


Originally Posted By Max_Mike:
the obligatory...

Draw down.



lol, with my 12 guage?
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:40:21 PM EDT

Originally Posted By JBravo223:
about five minutes ago two guys, claiming to be with the "Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (?)" came knocking at my door.

Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:41:22 PM EDT

Originally Posted By napalm:

Originally Posted By JBravo223:
about five minutes ago two guys, claiming to be with the "Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (?)" came knocking at my door.




No wonder.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:41:31 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 2:43:26 PM EDT by mobius]
I see you have been hammer forging that sheet of aluminum foil while it's on your head.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:41:47 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 2:44:40 PM EDT by JBravo223]
lol
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:42:01 PM EDT
Was it these guys? If so, you're an Alien!


Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:42:42 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 2:44:01 PM EDT by JBravo223]
pretty much looked like them. one white guy and one black guy
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:47:42 PM EDT

Originally Posted By JBravo223:

I was being sarcastic.



And I was being facetious
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:58:43 PM EDT
LOL, I know but others may not.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 2:59:32 PM EDT
You failed.

Always come to the door naked and
sweaty when the JWs and mormons
show up.

Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:02:32 PM EDT
Always show up at the door with a bottle of booze in your hand and a gun stuck in the waistband of your briefs, which are the only things you're wearing besides a surly expression.

It drives away Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses. ATF, on the other hand, might get a little excited.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:02:57 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 3:03:46 PM EDT by NAKED-GUNMAN]

Originally Posted By TheCynic:
You failed.

Always come to the door naked and
sweaty when the JWs and mormons
show up.




Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! My Uncle did that!! As God as my witness!! They just smiled, turn around and said they'd come back later..they left.

I guess being NAKED runs in the family.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:05:27 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Swindle1984:
Always show up at the door with a bottle of booze in your hand and a gun stuck in the waistband of your briefs, which are the only things you're wearing besides a surly expression.

It drives away Mormons and Jehovah's Witnesses. ATF, on the other hand, might get a little excited.



LOL Great advice!!
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:19:19 PM EDT
My preferred method: naked, covered in vaseline, wearing only an LBE, and hand them a tube of KY Jelly.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:21:20 PM EDT

Originally Posted By TheCynic:
You failed.

Always come to the door naked and
sweaty when the JWs and mormons
show up.


i try to come to the door naked with a stick of butter and a lolly pop.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:27:29 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 3:28:16 PM EDT by KlubMarcus]

Originally Posted By JBravo223:
They looked really shady though. And I live in an apt building, so I'm not sure how they got in. I had a really funny feeling about these two.

That's a knock and grab! They are looking for a woman or a stupid guy who will open the door so that they can take a quick peek at anything worth stealing. Can they see anything valuable from where they were standing? If so, watch your place for the next few days. If they didn't think you would go easily, they might try when you aren't in.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:30:41 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 3:32:00 PM EDT by steve-oh]
.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:31:27 PM EDT

Originally Posted By KlubMarcus:

Originally Posted By JBravo223:
They looked really shady though. And I live in an apt building, so I'm not sure how they got in. I had a really funny feeling about these two.

That's a knock and grab! They are looking for a woman or a stupid guy who will open the door so that they can take a quick peek at anything worth stealing. Can they see anything valuable from where they were standing? If so, watch your place for the next few days. If they didn't think you would go easily, they might try when you aren't in.



This is why we keep everything worth stealing out of sight from the door and turn off all the lights backlighting us when we answer the door at night. They can't see what might be tempting to them and it lets us get a better look at them.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:31:50 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 3:35:07 PM EDT by steve-oh]
describe how they looked "shady". Most mormons are like 20 ish, whereas most JWs will have an older person and a younger person. Preferably one minority and one not.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:34:44 PM EDT

Originally Posted By spartacus2002:
My preferred method: naked, covered in vaseline, wearing only an LBE, and hand them a tube of KY Jelly.

.......that visual is pretty nasty.........................the question is .........Why did you answer the door without a gun in hand??......................I need some JD to wash out that visual
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:38:38 PM EDT

Originally Posted By MK4Mod0:

Originally Posted By spartacus2002:
My preferred method: naked, covered in vaseline, wearing only an LBE, and hand them a tube of KY Jelly.

.......that visual is pretty nasty..........I need some JD to wash out that visual



I'm not nasty! I'm so goodlooking, I could be Squatdog's twin brother
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:41:11 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 3:41:24 PM EDT by napalm]

Originally Posted By JBravo223:
pretty much looked like them. one white guy and one black guy





Nevermind. It wasn't LDS then.



Link Posted: 9/3/2005 3:43:00 PM EDT

Originally Posted By steve-oh:
describe how they looked "shady". Most mormons are like 20 ish, whereas most JWs will have an older person and a younger person. Preferably one minority and one not.




Ya. A clean shaven 20 year old with neatly trimed hair dressed in a suit doesnt seem shady to me.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 4:49:50 PM EDT

Originally Posted By spartacus2002:
My preferred method: naked, covered in vaseline, wearing only an LBE, and hand them a tube of KY Jelly.



all this stuff requires way to much prep time - instead, just have a chainsaw that has the chain removed beside the door - crank it up before opening. Go all the way outside because the misses will complain about fumes later if you dont. they should just run. the good part is that they will tell the others and you won't have any more problems for a while
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 4:56:56 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 4:58:13 PM EDT by st0newall]

Originally Posted By TheCynic:
You failed.

Always come to the door naked and
sweaty when the JWs and mormons
show up.




paint your body blue, put on a leather mask and nothing else, dress up your pet goat in a tutu, put the goat in a leather boundage harness.. if you have a small monkee mount it on the goat. opent he door and immediately invite them down to the cellar to meet the gimp...

film this.. sell it to some reality show.. you will make millions...
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 4:59:09 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 5:03:40 PM EDT by NH_AR_Shooter]
Dress up like this "fellow" and answer the door.



Or maybe this....


Link Posted: 9/3/2005 5:00:52 PM EDT
Guy, as a previous multiple robbery recipient I take stuff like this very seriously. I would talk to your neighbors( even thought that is an unusual thing to do these days) and see if anyone else dealt with them right away. I would also inform you property manager, and try and figure out how they got in. Chances are, someone held the door for them trying to be polite. If you see them again call the police. You were probably getting cased. Keep your firearms locked up for the next couple weeks when you are not home, and out of sight if at all possible.
Good luck.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 5:09:19 PM EDT
Did one of them look like this?

Link Posted: 9/3/2005 5:53:15 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 5:55:36 PM EDT by Colt_SBR]
=


Link Posted: 9/3/2005 6:03:09 PM EDT
When they knock on my door I quietly stare at them through the peephole and wait until they start to to walk away. Then I softly knock on the door and they turn around with quizzical looks on their faces and walk back to the door and knock again.......and I repeat the process. My record is 6 times for the cycle.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 6:06:03 PM EDT

Originally Posted By out-a-ammo:
You're not being paranoid if they are out to get you.




Man, you are my new hero. That's fricking hilarious.
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 6:12:24 PM EDT
I agree, thats the best......
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 6:14:53 PM EDT



That'll keep them away!
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 6:39:31 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/3/2005 6:40:10 PM EDT by NAKED-GUNMAN]

Originally Posted By VooDoo3dfx:
nobilis.average-bear.com/img/knocker.jpg


That'll keep them away!



Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!­

Link Posted: 9/3/2005 6:40:19 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Max_Mike:
the obligatory...

Draw down.



+500
Link Posted: 9/3/2005 7:19:31 PM EDT

Originally Posted By NAKED-GUNMAN:

Originally Posted By TheCynic:
You failed.

Always come to the door naked and
sweaty when the JWs and mormons
show up.




Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! My Uncle did that!! As God as my witness!! They just smiled, turn around and said they'd come back later..they left.

I guess being NAKED runs in the family.





You're uncle didn't happen to go to college in central Nebr. during the early 80's did he?

I have a friend, about 6' and 650 pounds, who opened the door to his trailerhouse straight out of the shower, dripping wet but wearing a towel. Filled the door, literally! Staring down to them on the ground (no porch, only steps) "You guys want hurt, don't you?"

They never again knocked on his door.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 9:09:34 AM EDT

Originally Posted By KlubMarcus:

Originally Posted By JBravo223:
They looked really shady though. And I live in an apt building, so I'm not sure how they got in. I had a really funny feeling about these two.

That's a knock and grab! They are looking for a woman or a stupid guy who will open the door so that they can take a quick peek at anything worth stealing. Can they see anything valuable from where they were standing? If so, watch your place for the next few days. If they didn't think you would go easily, they might try when you aren't in.



They could only see the bed in my bedroom from that angle. If I am home and someone trys to get in they aint leaving
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 9:13:01 AM EDT

Originally Posted By steve-oh:
describe how they looked "shady". Most mormons are like 20 ish, whereas most JWs will have an older person and a younger person. Preferably one minority and one not.



The black guy was just smiling a lot, but the white guy he was with was wearing a $400 pair of CK glasses. He didn't seem to try to convince me that I should join there club when I told him I wasn't interested. The black dud didn't talk at all. I didn't hear them ring any other door bells.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 9:14:34 AM EDT

Originally Posted By texastactical:
When they knock on my door I quietly stare at them through the peephole and wait until they start to to walk away. Then I softly knock on the door and they turn around with quizzical looks on their faces and walk back to the door and knock again.......and I repeat the process. My record is 6 times for the cycle.



I AM SOOOOOO DOING THIS SOMETIME!!!!!!
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 9:16:09 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/4/2005 9:16:36 AM EDT by M4-CQBR]
Just because you're not paranoid, doesn't mean someone isn't following you either.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 9:28:09 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Max_Mike:
the obligatory...

Draw down.



Agreed!


Some of those door-to-door religious solicitors can be downright ornery, aggressive and won't take no for an answer.

Link Posted: 9/4/2005 9:56:45 AM EDT
The first thing that tips you off on whether or not they're with th CoJCLDS is if they're wearing suits. Most that I've seen do.

I had a co-worker (in Pass Christian, MS unfortunately) that met them in the front yard. He told them he worshiped Satan and was going to hell and they were coming with him. Scared them so bad they dropped their stuff and hauled ass to the end of the street. BTW, he lives on a dead end street and they went the wrong way. He brought their stuff to them with the best crazy person look he could do and gave it back to them. They never came back to his street and no one else did either. He's an ex Marine, about 6'5" and could quite probably bench press a Buick. We'd get his help for all the jobs that 3 people couldn't do.

Make them think you're crazy and they'll leave you alone in the future. It sounds like your guys were there to do something else though.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:28:52 AM EDT
If they are dressed in black and white, they are probably Mormons.
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:35:04 AM EDT
What no red gag ball? Strap that fucker on, with the obligitory bottle of booze and a holstered sidearm and hand them a note telling them you are busy right now...
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:46:21 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/4/2005 10:52:10 AM EDT by shop_rat45]

Originally Posted By TheCynic:
You failed.

Always come to the door naked and
sweaty when the JWs and mormons
show up.




And then reach to grab one of them by the hand and say " I ordered some one taller, but you will do."

Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:49:52 AM EDT
Why would you open the door to talk to someone you don't know, or aren't expecting?

And beacause people are being silly.....two words.......land shark
Link Posted: 9/4/2005 10:50:35 AM EDT
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