I don't know if  anyone posted this before. LMAO at this!

NOT TO BE OUT DONE BY EBONICS IN CALIFORNIA, THE SOUTHERN ASSOCIATION OF COLLEGES AND SCHOOLS IS REQUESTING BILLIONS OF FEDERAL DOLLARS TO TEACH Y'ALLBONICS IN ALL CLASSROOMS SOUTH OF THE MASON-DIXON LINE.

INCLUDED HERE ARE SOME SAMPLES OF Y'ALLBONICS. IF YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND ANY
OF THEM, CONTACT YOUR CLOSEST SOUTHERN BUBBA FOR AN EXPLANATION...

ALL - (noun) - A petroleum-based lubricant. Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."

ARE - (noun) - A colorless, odorless gas; Oxygen. Usage: "He cain't breathe ...give 'im some ARE!"

BAMMER - (noun) - The state west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayum.  Usage: "A tornader jes went through Bammer an' left $20,000,000 in improvements."

BARD - (verb) - Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow." Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

BOB WAR - (noun) - A sharp, twisted cable. Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."

CHEER - (adverb) In this place. Usage: "Just set that bare rat cheer."

DID - (adjective) - Not alive. Usage: "He's did, Jim."

FAR - (noun) - A conflagration. Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh don't change the all in my  pickup truck, that thing's gonna catch far."

FARN - (adjective) - Not domestic. Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd he sed... must be from some farn country."

FAT - (noun), (verb) - a battle or combat; to engage in battle or combat.  Usage: "You younguns keep fat'n, n' ah'm gonna whup y'uh beehins."

HAZE - a contraction. Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah...haze ignert. He ain't thanked but a minnit n'is laf."

HEIDI - (noun) -Greeting.

HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting. Usage: "Heidi, Hire yew?"

IGNERT - (adjective) - Not smart. See "Arkansas native." Usage: "Them bammer boys sure are ignert!"

JAWJUH - (noun) - The state north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck."

JEW HERE - (noun) and (verb) contraction. Usage: "Jew here that my brother from Jawjuh got a job with that bob war fence cump'ny?"

MUNTS - (noun) - A calendar division. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd from him in munts."

RANCH - (noun) - A tool used for tight'nin' bolts. Usage: "I thank I leff my ranch in the back of that pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

RATS - (noun) - Entitled power or privilege. Usage: "We Southerners are willin' to fat for are rats."

RETARD -(verb)- To stop working. Usage: "My grampaw retard at age 65."

SEED - (verb) - past tense of "to see".

TAR - (noun) - A rubber wheel. Usage: "I hope that brother of mine from Jawjuh don't git a flat tar in my pickup truck."

THANK - (verb) - Cognitive process. Usage: "Ah thank ah'll have a coke."

TIRE - (noun) - A tall monument. Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek don't rise, sure hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Pars sometime."

VIEW - contraction (verb) and pronoun. Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City... view?"

[url]http://rebelangel.homestead.com/funstuff.html[/url]

Finally a language I'm qualified to teach !

What's the big fuss? Don't everbody talk like that?

Besides its Y'awbonics, no one I know says Yall, its Yaw damnit!  [:D]

LMAO. I'm not making a fuss but how come nobody makes fun of you yanks for the way you talk. I mean down here a car is a car and a bird is a bird but up there a car is a cah and a bird is a boid.[:\]

Damn Yankees.  

Corrections to the Southern Lexicon...

ERL - Petroleum lubricant.  Flows better than GREEZ (GREEZ is usually used for BARINS.)

IGNERNT - Not smart, not "in the know."

Y'ALL - Singular second person pronoun.

Y'ALL'S - Possessive form of Y'ALL

ALL Y'ALL - Plural second person pronoun

ALL Y'ALL'S - Possessive form of ALL Y'ALL

RECTUM - What happens when you drive while chemically impaired.

ENEMA - Someone not friendly

There are more, I'll have to peruse the ol' memory banks (that's the trouble with keeping so much in your hat, it gets a little cluttered after a while...)

FFZ

JEET - contraction (verb) Hungry - Usage: "We'se all just sittin' down fer supper... Jeet?"

'Bub - used for illumination "lat bub"
"Ay, wachis" - Last words.

Seems perfectly normal and reasonable.

So is the money going to go to a foriegn exchange type program?   You could send little Johnny north of the Mason Dixon line to educate some of those funny talkin yanks.

I'd vote for it.

I suppose we should all talk [b]'...like the man on the six o'clock news...'[/b]?

So, what do you do with good old boys, like me?

Eric The(ThankYouDonWilliamsWhereverYouAre)Hun[>]:)]

Well then ETH since you brought it up I'll comment.  How come on thr news in Texas the only one who has a drawl is the weatherman?  "I rekon it's fixin' to go to rain"

Easy, [b]1GUNRUNNER[/b], the weatherman in Texas is the only fellow on the news that we will likely trust, and there's no sense making him sound like some gull durn foreigner to betray that sense of trust!

If he sounds Texan, he may actually be familiar with our Texas weather. If he sounds like something else, WTF could he possibly know about Texas weather!

Eric The(FountOfAllTexasWisdom)Hun[>]:)]

lmaorolf!!!!!![^]

And he's quick too [>:/]

Ayuh, we yanks can get to speakin' real funny some times.

The area around Boston has a variety of accents.  Beacon Hill Brahmins still retain a lot of British accent, while South Boston (Southie) being as it is, a colony of Ireland has a completely different sound often fouled up by actors trying to sound like they are from BAAAAHstun.

Meanwhile, take someone from nearly anywhere else in Massachusetts and transport them up to "Down East" Maine or Northern Vt. and New Hampshire and they will swear they are in a different world. Northern Vt. is heavily infused with Quebecois French, while Northern New Hampshire is influenced by Maine and Canada.

It's pretty neat.

It'd be pretty boring if everyone spoke exactly the same way.

Actually the majority of southern talk posted so far is 'exaggerated Foxworthy I can't get a laugh any other way talk.' Green_Furniture is the only one to really hit it the closest with 'bub' for bulb. You got to go pretty deep into the backwoods to hear that Foxworthy talk, I guess the main thing is we're slower talking(you yanks get are a big hurry I guess) and there is a 'drawl' but not usually the massive mispronunciations posted here.

faw kyew.....

LMAO

And remember this. When someone from Louisiana ask you if you want a Coke, they will then ask you "what kind. All soft drinks are Cokes to us.

"You want a Coke Boudreaux"

"Mais, ya Thibodeaux"

"Mais, what kind"

"Mais, a rootbeer coke"

Here is a pic of North Central Texas' most trusted weatherman, Troy Dungan, of Channel 8 WFAA in Dallas, Texas:

[img]http://www.wfaa.com/images/reporters/dungan_sm.jpg[/img]

Now, fess up! Don't the boy just exude 'trust'?

And with a bow-tie, we know that he's never been to the big cities to get seduced and sidetracked with that metereological mumbo-jumbo!

Who needs doppler radar, when granny's arthritic knee is still working?

Eric The(GoodOldBoy)Hun[>]:)]

that's really "TheHun's" high school graduationn picture...

Post from threefiftynone -

[size=3][/size=3]

Eric The(Again)Hun[>]:)]

"Doan' hurt me-don't! I hain't ever done no harm to a ghos'. I alwuz liked dead people, en done all I could for 'em. You go en git in de river ag'in, whah you b'longs, en doan' do nuffn to Ole Jim, at 'uz alwuz yo' fren'."

Strait from Huck Fin.

Printed in 1918

He said exude!