A shepherd was tending his flock in a remote pasture  when suddenly a  brand-new Jeep Cherokee appeared out of a dust cloud, advanced toward  him and stopped. The driver, a 24-year-old young man wearing a Brioni suit,  Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and a Yves Saint Laurent tie, leaned  out of the window and asked our shepherd, "If I can tell you exactly how many  sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?"


The shepherd looked at the young guy, then at his peacefully grazing flock,  and calmly answered, "Sure."

The young man parked his car, whipped out his notebook computer, connected   it to a cell phone, surfed to a NASA page on the Internet where he called up a  GPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, then opened up a database and some Excel spreadsheets with complex formulas.  He finally printed out a  50-page report on his hi-tech miniaturized printer, turned around to our shepherd   and said, "You have here exactly 1,586 sheep!"

"Amazing! That's correct! Like I agreed, you can take one of my sheep," said the   shepherd. The shepherd watched the man make a selection and bundle it into his   Cherokee.

When he was finished the sheepherder said, "If I can  tell you exactly what your  political persuasion is, where you're from and who  you work for, will you give me  my sheep back?"

"Okay, why not," answered the young man.

"You're a Democrat from Palm Beach and you're working for Jesse Jackson,"  said the shepherd.

"Wow! That's correct," said the young man. "How did  you ever guess that?"

"Easy," answered the shepherd. "Nobody called you,  but you showed up here  anyway. You want to be paid for providing a solution  to a question I already knew  the answer to. And, you don't know squat about what you're doing because you just took my dog."

[b]Busload of Politicians[/b]

A busload of politicians were driving down a country
road when the bus suddenly ran off the road and crashed
into an old farmer's field.

The old farmer heard the tragic crash so he rushed over
to investigate. He then began digging a large grave to
bury the politicians.

A few hours later, the local sheriff was driving past
the farmer's field and noticed the bus wreck. He
approached the old farmer and asked where all the
politicians had gone.

The old farmer explained that he'd gone ahead and
buried all of them.

"Were they ALL dead?" asked the puzzled sheriff.

"Well, some of them said they weren't," said the old
farmer, "but you know how them politicians lie."

[:D]


LMAO!!!