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Posted: 9/11/2010 9:49:28 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/13/2010 8:39:14 PM EDT by thebeekeeper1]
Alright guys, here's the deal. The last few weeks, I've noticed some weird sh*t going on in my house. I think somebody's breaking into my house when I'm away at work and maybe even at night when my wife and I are asleep. I don't know what to do. No broken locks or windows. No signs of forced entry. I've been VERY careful to make sure eveything's locked before I leave or go to bed. Still, somebody's breaking in and stealing shit.

Now, as if that weren't weird enough, HERE'S where it gets REALLY strange. My electronics . . my wife's jewelry . . money . . guns . . all of that is still there. This punk is only after one thing. My beer. Yeah. Somebody is breaking into my f*cking house and stealing my f*cking beer! Oh hell no! So here's what I've done. I've set up this trail camera I have in the kitchen, and I'm gonna catch this son of a b*tch and turn his punk *ss into the cops.

Any other ideas what I should do with this punk? I'll update this thread with pics once I have them. Shouldn't be more than one or two nights max. F*cker's gone through two 12 packs in the last week. I'm pissed.

Imagetum

EDIT: Sunday at 8:50 pm. Nothing last night. Beer (and everything else) still there. No pics on trail camera. It's GOTTA happen tonight.

EDIT 2: Obligatory pics of wife on page 4.

EDIT 3: Well guys, it finally happened last night. First, I want to thank all of you for your concern, and your humor through all of this. It's been stressful, but you've helped me get through it. I spent most of the day today talking to police and lawyers. So, they came back last night. I didn't know there would be 4 of them, a white, two blacks, and a f*cking GINGER. I hate GINGERS. I'm a little scratched up, but they were all a bunch of pussies so I managed to make it out alive. Pics of the thieves on page 5. Like I said, a white, two blacks, and a freaking GINGER.

<Second title edit. You put the word "fuckers" back in, now you and your thread get locked. ––tbk1>
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:50:46 PM EDT
He's living in your attic.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:50:54 PM EDT
Not sure if serious.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:51:22 PM EDT
Waiting for an update from the OP where he sheepishly posts pictures of his own sloshed ass sleepwalking to the fridge.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:52:06 PM EDT
imagetcha is getting himself by sleepwalking into beer.
that or its another family member.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:52:20 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Rogue-Sasquatch:
his own sloshed ass sleepwalking to the fridge.

My first thoughts.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:52:46 PM EDT
Wait...really?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:53:26 PM EDT
It's your dog stealing the brew.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:53:31 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Rogue-Sasquatch:
Waiting for an update from the OP where he sheepishly posts pictures of his own sloshed ass sleepwalking to the fridge.


Yea, I was thinking the same thing.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:53:50 PM EDT
Humor is elusive to GD
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:54:10 PM EDT
your wife is trying to tell you something
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:55:51 PM EDT
Do you take Ambien or any other sleep aid?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:56:25 PM EDT
tagged for picks of the thief
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:57:38 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/11/2010 9:58:36 PM EDT by hungrymonkey]
You have kids? Living with relatives?

Sometimes, I drink more beer than I realize. Or it could be your dog.

Awaiting trail cam updates. (and quietly drinking free beers)
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:57:51 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Rogue-Sasquatch:
Waiting for an update from the OP where he sheepishly posts pictures of his own sloshed ass sleepwalking to the fridge.


Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:58:05 PM EDT
Originally Posted By myfathersson:
He's living in your attic.


This.

All bullshit aside, this happened to me. Homeless person living in my attic. I discovered their shit one afternoon when I went up there. I went up looking for rats/cats/bats whatever the fuck was thumping up there at night, and found candles, blanket, food wrappers, crack pipe, etc... Our house had a utility room with 'outside the house only' access. In there was also a small attic access. Wife did laundry out there, never locked the door, figuring "Its just the washroom", etc..

Thankfully, the squatter wasnt up there. I tossed all the shit in the garbage can, locked the utility room and stayed up all night, waiting for trouble. Never came.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:58:28 PM EDT

Originally Posted By hungrymonkey:
You have kids?
This is what I was thinking.


Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:58:38 PM EDT
I can has tag?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:58:45 PM EDT
Reminds me of this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06X9qXTvKNQ


Pretty sure the above video is believed to be a fake though.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:58:58 PM EDT
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:59:22 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Rogue-Sasquatch:
Waiting for an update from the OP where he sheepishly posts pictures of his own sloshed ass sleepwalking to the fridge.


+1
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 9:59:39 PM EDT
Originally Posted By imagetcha:
Alright guys, here's the deal. The last few weeks, I've noticed some weird sh*t going on in my house. I think somebody's breaking into my house when I'm away at work and maybe even at night when my wife and I are asleep. I don't know what to do. No broken locks or windows. No signs of forced entry. I've been VERY careful to make sure eveything's locked before I leave or go to bed. Still, somebody's breaking in and stealing shit.

Now, as if that weren't weird enough, HERE'S where it gets REALLY strange. My electronics . . my wife's jewelry . . money . . guns . . all of that is still there. This punk is only after one thing. My beer. Yeah. Somebody is breaking into my f*cking house and stealing my f*cking beer! Oh hell no! So here's what I've done. I've set up this trail camera I have in the kitchen, and I'm gonna catch this son of a b*tch and turn his punk *ss into the cops.

Any other ideas what I should do with this punk? I'll update this thread with pics once I have them. Shouldn't be more than one or two nights max. F*cker's gone through two 12 packs in the last week. I'm pissed.

Imagetum


Split personality. Screen name is "imagetcha" but he signed the end of his post as "Imagetum".

Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:00:03 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Kalahnikid:
Not sure if serious.

This.

If it's not you, I'd take a good look at the wife. She's probably soused...
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:00:57 PM EDT
Yes Serious.

No Ambien (or any other drugs).

No relatives. Just me and wife.

And thanks for the attic idea. SH*T. I guess I won't be sleeping tonight. Of course, haven't slept well at all through this whole thing.

I'm gonna find out who's stealing my beer and whoop his ass. Better not be me sleepwalking or I'll beat me up good.

I'll let you guys know. He'll probably be back tonight.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:01:10 PM EDT
Originally Posted By balloo93:
Do you take Ambien or any other sleep aid?


Bingo, that was my first thought.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:01:35 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/11/2010 10:02:02 PM EDT by Bugalaman]
this thread could get good

ETA: did you ask your wife about it?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:05:23 PM EDT
Originally Posted By diamond_c:
Originally Posted By imagetcha:
Alright guys, here's the deal. The last few weeks, I've noticed some weird sh*t going on in my house. I think somebody's breaking into my house when I'm away at work and maybe even at night when my wife and I are asleep. I don't know what to do. No broken locks or windows. No signs of forced entry. I've been VERY careful to make sure eveything's locked before I leave or go to bed. Still, somebody's breaking in and stealing shit.

Now, as if that weren't weird enough, HERE'S where it gets REALLY strange. My electronics . . my wife's jewelry . . money . . guns . . all of that is still there. This punk is only after one thing. My beer. Yeah. Somebody is breaking into my f*cking house and stealing my f*cking beer! Oh hell no! So here's what I've done. I've set up this trail camera I have in the kitchen, and I'm gonna catch this son of a b*tch and turn his punk *ss into the cops.

Any other ideas what I should do with this punk? I'll update this thread with pics once I have them. Shouldn't be more than one or two nights max. F*cker's gone through two 12 packs in the last week. I'm pissed.

Imagetum


Split personality. Screen name is "imagetcha" but he signed the end of his post as "Imagetum".



I - am - going - to - get - him . . .I'm gonna get him . . .I'm a get him . . . . I'm a get um . . .. . Imagetum
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:05:50 PM EDT
LOL, sleepdrinking.

Are you riding the Ambien Walrus?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:06:54 PM EDT
Originally Posted By GeorgeInNePa:

Originally Posted By Kalahnikid:
Not sure if serious.

This.

If it's not you, I'd take a good look at the wife. She's probably soused...


Come to think of it. . . . she HAS been more fun lately.

Oh, you guys don't think she's got a guy coming over and HE'S drinking my beer do you?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:07:09 PM EDT
Another guess:

OP has a Possum (or other critter) problem, and will later be shooting one.

He will then post pictures of the corpse posed alongside some empty beer cans.

Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:08:02 PM EDT
Holy shit.....I am so in.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:08:17 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/11/2010 10:10:17 PM EDT by scottedward58]
If no ones on any sleep meds in his house and all his doors are locked then I bet some kid in his neighborhood learned how to pick locks on the internets and is using his new found skill to get beer. OP should chain his doors at night or do us all a favor and shoot him when he catches him so he can't go on to bigger crimes.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:08:30 PM EDT
Originally Posted By R_Fury:
Holy shit.....I am so in.


x2
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:09:07 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Cromlech:
Another guess:

OP has a Possum (or other critter) problem, and will later be shooting one.

He will then post pictures of the corpse posed alongside some empty beer cans.



Sounds like we found Opie's present location. Perhaps we should send a recovery team?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:09:59 PM EDT

Originally Posted By imagetcha:
Originally Posted By GeorgeInNePa:

Originally Posted By Kalahnikid:
Not sure if serious.

This.

If it's not you, I'd take a good look at the wife. She's probably soused...


Come to think of it. . . . she HAS been more fun lately.

Oh, you guys don't think she's got a guy coming over and HE'S drinking my beer do you?
Do you have a pool? Or a friend that has a pool?

Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:10:22 PM EDT
OP, If it's any consolation this whole thing has been very amusing.
Good luck.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:11:14 PM EDT
maybe your wife is throwing pool parties while you are at work?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:12:23 PM EDT
In on one for the hilarity.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:13:44 PM EDT
Either you or your wife is taking Ambian. It's causing one of you to unknowingly drink all your beer while making it look like a forced entry.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:13:59 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/11/2010 10:16:42 PM EDT by DocBull]
Hmm depending if it is swill brew leave him be, now if it was like what I am drinking at 2.50 a can then I would be going all ninja berserker on them
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:16:53 PM EDT
Time for an intervention, OP.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:17:54 PM EDT
Your wife left the key at the pool party.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:18:53 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Kalahnikid:
Not sure if serious.


Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:19:34 PM EDT
Originally Posted By scottedward58:
If no ones on any sleep meds in his house and all his doors are locked then I bet some kid in his neighborhood learned how to pick locks on the internets and is using his new found skill to get beer. OP should chain his doors at night or do us all a favor and shoot him when he catches him so he can't go on to bigger crimes.


I was thinking it might be some of the neighborhood kids. Still haven't heard anything, 1:20 am here.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:20:35 PM EDT
tagging for outcome
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:21:00 PM EDT
Originally Posted By caduckgunner:
maybe your wife is throwing pool parties while you are at work?


WE have a pool, yeah what did I miss a thread about pool parties or something? I haven't been here much in the last year.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:22:23 PM EDT
Originally Posted By VRMN8R:
In on one for the hilarity.


Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:23:30 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 9/11/2010 10:24:01 PM EDT by Peacemakerx]
you are beer lover sleepwalker.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:24:47 PM EDT
Originally Posted By imagetcha:
Originally Posted By caduckgunner:
maybe your wife is throwing pool parties while you are at work?


WE have a pool, yeah what did I miss a thread about pool parties or something? I haven't been here much in the last year.


Ummm, I don't quite know how to break this to you.....Are you sitting down?
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:29:15 PM EDT
imagetacha,

man I'm sorry. I really didn't think you'd notice.


We have shitty 3.2 beer in OK and well, you know how it goes.


Sometimes we just have to sneak across the border.
Link Posted: 9/11/2010 10:30:25 PM EDT

Originally Posted By R_Fury:
Originally Posted By imagetcha:
Originally Posted By caduckgunner:
maybe your wife is throwing pool parties while you are at work?


WE have a pool, yeah what did I miss a thread about pool parties or something? I haven't been here much in the last year.


Ummm, I don't quite know how to break this to you.....Are you sitting down?


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