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Posted: 8/20/2012 1:59:23 PM EDT
Shocked, i tell you.
And, no, she didn't die.

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20622755,00.html


Calling it a "miracle" she's still alive, Rosie O'Donnell suffered a heart attack last week and is now recovering at home.

Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:00:02 PM EDT
Well damn.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:00:24 PM EDT
Damnit.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:00:34 PM EDT
She has a heart?  Oh, you mean the grease pump had a mechanical hiccup.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:01:03 PM EDT
Welp, better luck next time.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:02:27 PM EDT
Get Well Soon sweetheart
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:02:49 PM EDT
Even for a hardened lesbo, looking at too many pics of Michelle can do that to a person.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:03:28 PM EDT
Well, I would like to wish her the best but......
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:03:43 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:04:02 PM EDT
Was she molesting another 9yr old girl when it happened?
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:04:05 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:04:37 PM EDT
O'Donnell said her own health problems started on Aug. 14 after she helped "an enormous woman" struggling to get out of her car in a parking lot in Nyack, N.Y.

A few hours later, her chest ached, both arms felt sore as if they were bruised, she became nauseous, and had clammy skin.


Who was the "enormous woman" - herself?
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:05:34 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:06:31 PM EDT
Damn, exact same thing happened to me on the 8th.  I took two aspirin and Googled 'what are the symptoms of a heart attack?"  and am now resting at home with a new stent in an artery that was 95% clogged.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:06:35 PM EDT
Too bad all those forks made her so fat!
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:07:23 PM EDT
This wouldn't have happened if they had banned all those spoons.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:07:30 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:07:39 PM EDT
Quoted:
Despite all the mean, nasty, vicious, hateful things she's said about people like me...it's nice that she's ok.


I won't wish ill on her, but I won't wish it off her either.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:07:50 PM EDT
How many EMT's careers are now ended because of injuries sustained getting her disgusting carcass in to the bus?
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:07:59 PM EDT
damn Bayer asprin...didn't they do human testing on Jews in Nazi Germany?
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:08:43 PM EDT
I can imagine the doctors and nurses tripping over themselves to administer care to such a warm and kind person.

















































Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:09:23 PM EDT
Quoted:
She has a heart?  Oh, you mean the grease pump had a mechanical hiccup.


Well, it was either that or a stroke and we all know the latter is impossible for her.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:09:28 PM EDT
Quoted:
Damn, exact same thing happened to me on the 8th.  I took two aspirin and Googled 'what are the symptoms of a heart attack?"  and am now resting at home with a new stent in an artery that was 95% clogged.


Glad you made it. How old are you and what kind of shape are you in? Sharing our story could be of help to some.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:09:34 PM EDT
Yet my dad has one at the age of 57 a few weeks ago and dies
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:10:27 PM EDT
Don't care for the woman one bit, but I wish her well.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:11:01 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:12:59 PM EDT
Quoted:
Despite all the mean, nasty, vicious, hateful things she's said about people like me...it's nice that she's ok.


Wow!  I'd only accept this position if she truly had her life changed by this event and realized that she can't push her views (which are the only ones that matter in her opinion) on others.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:13:34 PM EDT
I hope Tom Selleck sends her a getwell card that reads HAHA.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:14:52 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:15:36 PM EDT




Quoted:

Yet my dad has one at the age of 57 a few weeks ago and dies






Sorry to hear about your loss, Only the good die young!











I guess she (Rosey) will live for a long time!



Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:15:38 PM EDT



Quoted:


I hope Tom Selleck sends her a getwell card that reads HAHA.


srsly



for teh lulz



 
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:20:06 PM EDT

 
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:21:31 PM EDT
I am sure there's some random rapist with AIDS in Haiti who has first dibs on whatever sympathy I could come up with for her.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:22:55 PM EDT
I didn't know she even HAD a heart.



It must be very tiny, though.  
But have no worries,  she's NOT a candidate for a stroke.  Strokes happen in the brain.  Since she has no brain, she is not at risk of a stroke.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:23:38 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:24:38 PM EDT
Here is my surprised face  
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:25:42 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:26:02 PM EDT
Fuck now she's going to be more preachy....
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:29:52 PM EDT
She'll do anything to get her has-been ass in the news.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:30:23 PM EDT
Quoted:
Welp, better luck next time.


Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:30:45 PM EDT
Maybe she got her mouth on some bad crack...??
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:30:56 PM EDT
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:31:24 PM EDT
[Maxwell Smart voice] Missed it by that much! [/Maxwell Smart voice]
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:34:09 PM EDT
Quoted:
Maybe she got her mouth on some bad crack...??


Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:35:19 PM EDT
She may not be long for this world with blockage like that if she does not change her lifestyle of gluttony.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:46:46 PM EDT
Quoted:
Quoted:
She has a heart?  Oh, you mean the grease pump had a mechanical hiccup.


Well, it was either that or a stroke and we all know the latter is impossible for her.


Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:48:42 PM EDT
No surprise here.


We knew there would be some liberal fallout from the Newsweek cover.


Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:52:42 PM EDT
Quoted:
No surprise here.


We knew there would be some liberal fallout from the Newsweek cover.




Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:54:06 PM EDT
More than likely this will create a life altering event for her and she will get thin and healthy.  And even more liberal.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:55:01 PM EDT
That's too bad, I'm sorry to hear that


















she didn't die.
Link Posted: 8/20/2012 2:56:46 PM EDT
So there's  still hope I can see her die in a fiery car wreck whilst being sodomized by a 600# gorilla
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