Posted: 5/11/2002 7:34:22 PM EDT
With all this talk of ninjas lately, I went and rented "Revenge of the Ninja" and let me tell you. It was cool and by cool I mean totally SWEET!
There was this scene where the guy got a throwing star through the eye... I crapped my pants! Then there was this scene where this grandma throws a smoke bomb and disappears from the other ninja only to hide behind a rice paper curtain and get impaled through it by the ninja's sword... HOLY CRAP, I was super pissed and I almost flipped out; killing old ladies is a 0 on the flip-o-meter...
The best part was when the final fight took place on top of a building between the two "totally awesome" ninjas and the bad guy ninja grabbed the good guy by the throat; so he turned around and cut the guy in half!!!! Except he was a fake ninja!!! OMG DUDE, I'm like screaming "Ninjas are fast, smooth, cool, strong, powerful, and sweet." Then they both started flying and cutting down this building.
Hell there was even a babe who was getting all beat up the whole movie and then was put in the wet t-shirt hot tub torture chamber. (there was a lot of hot tubs in this movie...cause it was filmed like in 1982 when that "Hunter" cop show was on.... If your not pumped up by this movie your a moron.
I even heard some guitars wailing in the back.. PS Don't miss the scene where the ninja beats up the village people in the park...It was so cool that other ninjas went and killed all the French people in France.
If you don't believe that ninjas have REAL Ultimate Power you better get a life right now or they will chop your head off!!! It's an easy choice, if you ask me...
Did you love the movie with your whole body, including your pee pee?
First time I saw that movie I was - I dunno - 14 y.o., & I crapped my pants all day long. Now, every time I remember it, my pee pee gets pumped up, due to the residual Real Ultimate Power, which makes me wee wee in my pants. [:I]
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