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11/22/2017 10:05:29 PM
Posted: 8/25/2004 1:41:00 PM EST



Questions Not To Ask In Foreign Lands

By
Gerhard Reinke

IRELAND
“Are you magically delicious or just angry and drunk?
This beer is black- did a leprechaun crap in it?”

FRANCE
“Can I get a side of Freedom Fries with that?
Aren’t the French just Germans who can make sauces?”

ITALY
“Is the Pope Polish? Does he have super powers like Jesus?
I could sure go for a can of Spaghetti-O’s! ”

POLAND
“Do you hire foreigners to screw in your lightbulbs?”

GERMANY
“Is this bratwurst kosher?”

TURKEY
“Where’s the hash at?
It’s cool to recreationally slaughter Kurds?”

KOREA
“Can you watch my puppy for a minute, or must you people deep fry him?”

CHINA
“This wall isn’t so great.”

ENGLAND
“Did you ever get a piece of ass from that Diana chick?”

SWEDEN
“Do you have any normal meatballs?
Want to hear a dumb blonde joke?”

YEMEN
“Yemen? That’s a stupid name for a country. What’s it mean -- ‘Land Of Fanatics And Dust' ?”

INDIA
“You don’t live in teepees?
Where can I get a good juicy steak around here?”

ETHIOPIA
“After a long day of travel, I’m famished. Hey – those flies sure love your pregnant son!”

CANADA
“You’re like Americans without money.”

SPAIN
“So, this is the country that’s not Portugal? Wow.
Your women can shave if they want to, right?
Where can I get some Cheez Whiz nachos?”

SOUTH AFRICA
“I liked it better the other way.”

MEXICO
“What's that smell?”

SAUDI ARABIA
“Would you like to see my designs for a solar powered car?
Is it legal to beat your wives here, or what?”

RUSSIA
“Is it always this cold and economically devastated?”

UZBEKISTAN
“Can you spell Uzbekistan?”

GREECE
“I hear this place is a less expensive version of Italy."

AFGHANISTAN
“Seriously, where is the real country… where is everything?”

JAPAN
“What’s Hiroshima? Is that a kind of sushi?”

AUSTRALIA
“How can we stop Mel Gibson? Is there a cure?”

AMERICA
“Was John Wayne gay?”

Link Posted: 8/25/2004 1:45:57 PM EST
Colorado: Do you guys have any REAL beer here?

Texas: I call seconds on the sheep

Sgtar15
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 1:49:19 PM EST

Originally Posted By Prefect:

GERMANY
“Is this bratwurst kosher?”





lol
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 1:49:48 PM EST

Originally Posted By sgtar15:
Colorado: Do you guys have any REAL beer here?

Texas: I call seconds on the sheep

Sgtar15



Colorado sucks ass


Texas rocks


Link Posted: 8/25/2004 1:51:55 PM EST
Columbia
"Whats all this white stuff, I didnt think it snowed down here?"
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 1:53:29 PM EST
Palestine: Where's your Rabbi?

Cuba: You got any Swisher Sweets?

Link Posted: 8/25/2004 1:54:35 PM EST
AUSTRIA: G'day, mate!

(I know it's not a question)
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 1:55:02 PM EST
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 1:55:45 PM EST
Australia: "So is it customary to feed your first born to crocs?"
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 1:59:18 PM EST
[Last Edit: 8/25/2004 2:04:32 PM EST by chrome1]

Originally Posted By sgtar15:
Colorado: Do you guys have any REAL beer here?

Texas: I call seconds on the sheep

Sgtar15



Texas : Is that how you always help sheep over the fence

Kansas : Is it true that you can watch your dog run away for 2 days ?

Canada : Where can I get the grip changed on my seal club

England : Yo .. Is this beer supposed to be warm and taste like pond scum ?
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 2:00:48 PM EST
hilarious!
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 2:05:20 PM EST

Originally Posted By Palo_Duro:
Palestine: Where's your Rabbi?





Palestine is a country????????
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 2:14:11 PM EST

Originally Posted By choad33:

Originally Posted By Palo_Duro:
Palestine: Where's your Rabbi?





Palestine is a country????????



I believe the title of the post is "...foreign lands."
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 2:15:34 PM EST
[Last Edit: 8/25/2004 2:17:08 PM EST by Bobby_the_Hun]
ETHIOPIA
“After a long day of travel, I’m famished. Hey – those flies sure love your pregnant son!”





Link Posted: 8/25/2004 2:18:49 PM EST
Iraq: What happened to the Bath Party? I love bikinis and jacuzzis!

Japan: Got any American made TVs?

Andes Mountains: What do guys do around here if you get hungry?

Link Posted: 8/25/2004 2:19:32 PM EST
RUSSIA. Will the car start or do we have to take the train again?
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 2:30:22 PM EST
Japan: Got any larger condoms?
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 2:32:43 PM EST
[Last Edit: 8/25/2004 2:34:49 PM EST by Palo_Duro]
France: Why are your hands in the air?

Isn't your country's flag all white?

Link Posted: 8/25/2004 5:52:42 PM EST

Originally Posted By Prefect:

CHINA
“This wall isn’t so great.”




Was thinking exactly that, the other day in Beijing.

Actually, things I was tempted to say:

(Standing in Tianamen Square) "So...what exactly happened here in 1989?"
"Free Tibet!"
Link Posted: 8/25/2004 6:13:49 PM EST
Texas restaurant - I would like a Pepsi or a cola because only an idiot calls a soda a "coke".

Link Posted: 8/25/2004 6:20:46 PM EST
LMFO, good stuff
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