Lowered the office chair of a 5 foot nothing woman. could barely see above the desk., if someone takes the day off all their stuff my find itself stacked as a tower, the best one was not by me though. Person's remote start started giving a low battery beep. They hid it in another person's desk and did the whole I don't hear anything while they reorganized their desk to find the source  of the noise

Coworker opened the hood of a customer's car and found a live possum under the hood. Screamed, shut the hood and told the customer he couldn't change the oil until the animal was gone. She came back a couple days later. We made sure he would be the one working on the car, and put a rubber rat on top of the engine. He screamed. He also locks his vehicle now, since we put condoms on his shifter and turn signal handle, with a note saying "I was shopping, found these and thought of you. Can't wait for the fun later."

Pranks are stupid. You never know when the guy that got pranked is on his last nerve and will decide to take his anger out on anyone who happens to be standing near.  I used to know a real prankster whose idea of a good time was to buy a box of fresh bait squid, open it, and leave it under the seat of another guy's work truck on Friday.  By Monday you would come into work and the whole box of bait would be nothing but maggots and putrid stink.  It ended when that particular prankster got beat near to hospitalization and fired for being an asshole.  I'm sure the prankster sees it as harmless fun, but everybody else sees it as harming productivity, and ruining morale.

Years ago, while working for an HVAC and plumbing company:

Electric service came in upstairs in the garage, kitchen was downstairs overlooking the lake as far away from the service as possible. Electrician bitched and moaned all day about what a shitty house it was to wire and all of the difficulties he was having (it was a shitty house to plumb as well). Coworker finds a scrap or the wire used for the range feed and stuffs it up, above a doorway, with the actual range feed.
Co-worker calls electrician over and says " Hey Joe, I'm tired of your bitching, here's something to bitch about", he then yanks a loop of the scrap wire loose enough to shear it in half with a cable cutter...the look of defeat on the electrician's face is still with me to this day.

As I recall, that electrician never spoke to us again without saying multitudes of fuck and fuckers.

That's why you need to pick your victim. Pull the prank during down or slow time, and pull it on someone who will take it with the humor you intend, and ideally pull something in return. Don't do anything that will actually cause damage or injury, set some limits. It really CAN be harmless fun, if done right.

Our office phone have the normal volume adjustment on top of the phone, but only a select few of us know about the volume adjustment and the bottom of the phone as well.

Laughter ensues.

Some of this shit posted here would get someone killed around here. Seriously.  You shit in my lunchbox, I hope you enjoyed that last dump.  It's worth the jail time if it isn't found justifiable homicide.

OK, enough of my internet badassery.  Quite a few pranks have been pulled around here over the years.  I still top the list as the best one.  Parking places are a big deal here. It's based on time of service and nothing else.  I had just started here in Feb of '93.  Boss had a desirable parking lot next door.  He was out of town.  New parking permits came and they are in envelops that are resealable gummy adhesive.  We swapped his with my pass that puts you down my the river for a good long walk into work.  His boss even wrote a letter explaining why he was being moved out to BFE.  Everyone was involved but the receptionist.  She was a mean one when she wanted to be.  After everyone was huddled around looking at his letter when he returned to work, I opened mine and disclosed that I had been moved up to his lot.  Receptionists claws came out and I fessed up!

Boss got even with me when we went on a "field trip" to a news center up in Charlotte.  He told me I was representing the University and I needed to wear a suit. I showed up that morning in a coat and tie and them most uncomfortable shoes I've ever owned.

Same boss came in to work one day and told me to go out to his truck and in the bed was a free rifle case he was giving me.  His wife worked at a major firearms distributor up the road and got it free.  He wanted me to go get it before it was stolen.  Sure enough, got down there and there it was.  But I out smarted him.  I went and got my car and came up and took it out and straight into my trunk.   We had a dignitary on campus that day for commencements.  Place was crawling with Secrete Service.

I got an old friend a job here that was in the Air Guard reserves.  Of course he leaves his PC open when he goes to lunch.  I changed his screen saver to a bunch of guys on the beach wearing banana hammocks.
He got even by removing every damned bolt in my office chair and put it back together with tape and bubble gum.  I walked in that morning and pulled my chair back and it fell into pieces all over the floor.

I stuck a tail pipe whistler in another coworkers tail pipe.  He tried to put it in mine, but hard to do with 2.5" duals.

Forgot one of the best.
Same friend in the reserves.  Called up his work number on the air base, someone answered and said he was out on the flight line, could they take a message. And in my best fagotian accent, "Sure Honey, tell Lambchop our AIDS test came back negative and I'm ready to celebrate tonight!  And he's on his knees first!"
He called me an hour later cursing my like a sailor.  Took him months to get over that one!!!

took a motion detector and put it inline with a coworker's monitor.  if they kept their legs still under their desk too long, the monitor would shut off.  as soon as they moved, back on.  didn't really hurt anything, but really annoyed that coworker for almost a month before they figured it out

Not any more.

My favorite, being a machine gun touch typist is to swap keys on the keyboard of those who hunt and peck for keys.  Usually if you figure their user I'd/password you just swap a couple keys.  They keep pressing G and D keeps popping up on the screen.

Did it to a friend and forgot all about it.

Got a call from her husband (our families camped out and hunted together) that she came in that day and her computer and keyboard started beeping constantly like a car horn and wouldn't stop and she was freaking out.  I managed to get it fixed and owned up to it so she didn't get in trouble.  I looked like a four year old and lost a friend.

harmonica taped close to the fan works well.   Old one on used to be running a small wire from underneath the coil wire cap to the back of the drivers seat.   It'll wake you up.

It's all fun and games -
When I was a young Airman someone took my motorcycle helmet and another helmet of a friend (both were expensive Arai replica helmets) and smeared aircraft grease all on the inside of the ear cutouts.

Needless to say both helmets were ruined.

The fucker that did it went to Captain's Mast (NJP), he had to pay for two new replacement helmets out of his pocket.

One year, during SHOT Show, we put a coworkers truck on Craigslist and said it was "FREE TO A GOOD HOME, first one to call gets the truck". He got something like 3000 calls the first day. We put one of our co-workers staplers in jello. We filled a coworkers vents in his vehicle with the little pieces of paper from a two hole punch. i taped fishing line to a dollar bill and left it on the floor, trying to get a coworker, a different coworker (one WITHOUT a sense of humor) walked in and asked who's dollar it was. she bent over to grab it, and i pulled it away a couple feet. She stood back up, looked confused, and took a step forward, and bent over AGAIN!, I pulled it away again. This happened three times before she realized the dollar was on a string. We super glued a coworkers headset to his phone and called him. He almost knocked himself silly when he answered the phone and smacked himself in the head with the entire phone.
The best..... when you walk into the men's room in my office, to the left is four sinks, two urinals (with dividers), then two stalls. A coworker and I took a mannequin that we had for displays, and put a ballistic helmet, Oakley goggles, pants and boots on it. We then stood it up inside the first stall to where it looked like it was "peeking" over the stall down onto the urinals. We left it there and forgot about it. That weekend, the alarm on my building went off. My General Manager said it was hilarious because the deputy clearing the building opened the bathroom door and almost shit himself! He started screaming to the mannequin to "put his fucking hands in the air!" after screaming it several times, his partner started laughing his ass of and told him it was a dummy. The deputy still comes in here and tells us how he almost shot the mannequin.

I used to set the alarm on my watch to 1 second and auto restart then hook it to a ladder in the neighborhood pool.  Drove the other kids absolutely bonkers trying to figure out where the beeping was coming from.  Some kids wouldn't say anything but you could absolutely tell they were perplexed.  The look on their faces as they would keep going under and popping up and looking around said it all.   Some of them would swear they were hearing a beep and their parents would have the look on their faces.  Nobody ever figured it out, to my knowledge.

It's kind of funny how far that little beep will carry underwater.

We had a real douche that did our shipping and receiving, the type that would dish it out but couldn't even take the slightest bit of retaliation without being a cry baby bitch.

Well, this jackass had a coffee mug full of the clicky style ink pens and I had finally had enough of his shit.  One night after he was gone for the day, I went back to his little area

and proceeded to take every spring out of every ink pen he had jammed in this coffee cup...hilarity ensued.  I happened to be walking up the steps by his area a couple days later when

I hear the unmistakable sound of a clicky pen trying to click.  Then I hear, "What the...?  Who the...?  Mother FUCKER!!!"  and a loud crash.  He tried to use about 3 or 4 of the pens before he

figured it out and proceeded to sling coffee cup full of "defective" pens against the wall where upon impact several burst open and covered our bosses door with ink.


After that I was told I needed to leave the guy alone for a while.

Taped a harmonica behind my buddies grille last night!

The manager of the scrap yard next door to my shop stopped in for a visit one day and his phone rang nonstop the whole time he was there.  Every time it rang, he looked at it, shook his head, sent the call to voicemail and then said "bastards".  I asked what was going on and he said that apparently one of his coworkers had placed a couple of adds in local "Swap and Sell" type papers for free goats.  I think that went on for a couple of weeks before the calls finally slowed down.  To this day, I still ask if he's got any free goats when he comes in.

When I was in college I worked part time at AutoZone.  A couple of the guys there seemed to get great pleasure in waiting for one of us to go to the bathroom and then take a lighter & can of carb cleaner and shooting a five or six foot flame under the door while you were taking a shit.  If they didn't have a can of carb cleaner handy they'd take a roll of duct tape and throw it as hard as they could from 20' away.  Sounded like a damn bomb going off when it hit the door.  Either one would scare the shit out of you, literally.  

A few years ago I told a friend of mine about the reviews on Amazon for Haribo Sugar Free Gummi Bears. They are hysterical. They've since stop selling the sugar free type on Amazon because it became a "thing" to write funny reviews on there.

The sugar free ones contain Lycasin, which is a sugar alcohol. Many people, including myself, don't tolerate it well... we'll leave the description at gastric distress.

She showed her brother the reviews, he ended up buying a 5 lb. bag for his co-workers. Apparently the bag was gone pretty quick... and so were some of the co-workers. Anytime they couldn't find someone they had to check the bathroom.

Place I used to work at had a very small office off the main floor. Wait till one of the salespeople was stuck on the phone with something serious like an RMA or with HQ and go in and rip a nasty fart and quick slam the door shut.

Know of a desk worker who uses their desk to pull themselves and office chair to it? Smear a streak of tooth paste (that doesn't have a strong smell) under the lip of their desk..did this a few times. People always let out a loud "ough! What the hell!" Clear tape under an optical mouse is best, only half way works so it's not as obvious they will fiddle with it for a bit before checking. If they have a dark colored office chair a couple cap fills of water won't normally be noticed at first or until they stand up with a wet spot on their ass.

Clear tacky glue wherever appliciable for a practical joke. Cover desk in sticky notes...open sun roof? Few hand fills of shredder paper (cross cut for best frustration) list goes on.

Someone takes a shit in my toolbox and I'm going to whoop someone's ass. That's not a joke,  not is a stun gun

Saran Wrap over the bowl and under the seat is always a surprise.

Men splash everywhere, unless they sit then their junk hits  it and they jump.

Women splash all over and runs to the floor.

Im not going to go into detail, but back in the day when being a cop used to be fun, many, many things happened.  

Emails sent out if left logged on
OC sprayed into AC units
Cars moved
Shoes set on fire
Sniffing of fingers for marijuana with a rookie after catching lesbians out in a park after dark......



Being a cop used to be sooo much fun

Some people's definitions of "harmless prank" are pretty

I used to have a hole punch that we used to use for punching tags we hung on sprinkler risers. I didn't bother cleaning the trap out of the little dots for a month. One day I was working with a guy who was busting my ass all day. So I asked for his car keys, telling him I needed to get a tool out of his truck. I go out to my car, get my hole punch and take it to his truck. I proceed to pour the little dots into his defroster vent and then turned the fan knob all the way up. When we broke for lunch I watched him get in his truck and turn the key. Then it snowed. In his truck. I couldn't stop laughing. For a year those little dots came out of his vent every time he turned his defroster on.

Take screenshot of desktop, and make it the background.
Also invert the mouse buttons. 

ETA: Delete all icons off desktop after taking screenshot. 

You're not funny. You're an immature asshole. If I was your boss, I'd fire you. If you pulled one of those pranks on me, I'd kick your ass. Don't fuck with productivity, that costs money. You are truly pathetic. Picking on a shy person? WTF?

Small plastic spider taped to the mouthpiece of a landline phone will make a grown man scream like a little girl.

He was doing so well for about 15 sec, Then I think maybe his lips rubbed it.  He threw the phone then started dancing and screaming like he was being pulled into a wood chipper.

I hate my coworkers. Tricks would not be harmless but I don't go there.

KY jelly in the hand sanitizer is relatively harmless.

We used to change the auto correct in Word.  An officer would be typing out a report and the word "male" would get changed to "beautiful man"  or "suspect" would now be "shitbag".

Thats because he was working on the lunch shit. I mean shift

We have a vendor that the office is basically all guys that are friends. The bumper stickers that they put on each others vehicles are much worse.

My uncle and his coworkers once swapped out tailgates on F150s - One brown, one blue. One of the owners was involved. The other guy took a week for him to notice.

Did this on a construction site with 10 guys and one porta potty. Did I mention I took all the toilet paper out except for the two rolls that are locked up on the bar. Everyone stopped messi ng with my tools and truck after that.

A bit too far....

Fun police are here, break it up everyone.

Because a bored cop is a terrible thing.

For a while we had a fire dummy out back at the SO.  The following things may have happened between midnight and 4 am.

Dummy set up at the court clerks outside table.  With a shotgun under its chin. (one patrolman came left and returned before he noticed it---30 feet from his office door.).

Dummy thrown off the roof as a patrolman pulled in with pocket recorder groaning in pain playing in a pocket.

Fire dummy thrown off roof with noose around its neck.

FIFY

Problem is many people who love pranks don't do that. See this thread for proof. Fucking with peoples possessions or doing shit that wastes time and costs money.

When I work for people I go to work to make money and do my job not play fuck fuck games with middle age adolescents. When people work for me I'm not paying them to fuck with their coworkers. Every person I've worked with that really enjoyed pranking people was either an asshole, a bully, socially retarded or some combination of the three. It almost always bit them in the ass one way or the other.

I used to do this until they updated the policy about messing with coworkers' machines.

Put a  4" 3/8 or 7/16 bolt in the pivot of a reclining office chair.  Tape a stink bomb in the gap.  

When the person sits down and leans back the bolt falls out of the pivot and you cannot get out of the chair without the stink bomb vial getting ruptured.

The second time is even better because they recognize the sound of the bolt hitting the floor and they know they are fucked.  

THIS, ladies and gentlemen, is gaslighting.

That is fucking awesome.  

It seems some of you don't understand the term 'harmless'.

Where do you work?