Lets Play: Adventures of the Computer Tech...

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Lets Play: Adventures of the Computer Tech... (Page 1 of 2)

Posted: 8/24/2006 12:58:40 PM EDT

You know the game folks, we are here to test your h0t Haxxor sK1llZ!

I work at home running my own computer repair service. I receive a phone call today from a guy we'll call Fred.

Fred has a pretty nice system built by myself and a laptop. Fred's computer is not printing. Fred calls his manufacture and states that his computer is not printing and its a problem with Windows XP (from info he read online

).

I say, ok, lets go through some basic TS and see if we cant diagnose over the phone.

Fred says "no, its a manufactures problem, come fix it now."

I say "ok but let me remind you the policy that if it is a manufactures warrenty issue, the repair will be free, however in case there is some other problem the fee is $120.00 for the first hour and $75 for every hour thereafter."

Fred says "no problem, this one is OBVIOUSLY on you (meaning me)"

me says "Ok Fred, I'll see you in an hour"

Any guess as to what went wrong and who the tab was on?

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:02:22 PM EDT

[#1]

I vote the printer wasn't plugged in.

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:02:47 PM EDT

[#2]

pebkac

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:03:37 PM EDT

[#3]

Quoted:
pebkac

Huh?

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:06:08 PM EDT

[#4]

Quoted:

Quoted:
pebkac

Huh?

Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair.

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:06:14 PM EDT

[#5]

Quoted:
I vote the printer wasn't plugged in.

I have seen that happen...

Cable not connected.

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:06:33 PM EDT

[#6]

no paper?

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:07:58 PM EDT

[#7]

How many calls do you get for replacement mouse balls?

I'm serious.

Edit: Oh I am gonna go with no cable attached to printer for $200 Alex.

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:08:49 PM EDT

[#8]

Either he:

Didn't plug in the printer
It's ink cratridges are dry
The printer wasn't plugged into the computer.

End result: User stupidity

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:09:11 PM EDT

[#9]

ID-10-T

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:11:01 PM EDT

[#10]

Wrong driver installed.

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:11:19 PM EDT

[#11]

Either the printer wasn't turned on or the cable wasn't connected.

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:13:23 PM EDT

[#12]

He had a FAX driver selected as his default printer, not the printer, and his print jobs were going into the bit bucket.

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:14:39 PM EDT

[#13]

well
what was the problem?

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:15:21 PM EDT

[#14]

probably forgot to turn it on

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:15:41 PM EDT

[#15]

Well since the obvious choices of "no paper", "no ink", "not turned on" and "not connect" have been chosen, I'll take "he selected an alternate printer like 'Fax'" and got an error because he doesn't have a fax modem.

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:17:00 PM EDT

[#16]

There's nothing wrong with his printer. He just wants you to come to his house to ogle your tushie while you're bent over the desk, and he likes the way you say, "pulling some cable."

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:20:04 PM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:
ID-10-T

+1

Printer out of paper?

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:24:04 PM EDT

[#18]

OHS

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:40:07 PM EDT

[#19]

Any number of things, almost all of which are User Error and you're $120 richer, minus drive time and 10 minutes of TS time.

In no particular order:
1. Printer not selected.
2. Printer cable not connected.
3. Printer not plugged in or turned off.
4. Printer driver not installed.
5. No paper in printer.
6. Etc...

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:43:25 PM EDT

[#20]

He did not understand that RAM DISK is not an operating procedure?

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:44:10 PM EDT

[#21]

He was trying to print with the lap top and if it WAS networked he didnt have the computer on or it wasn't networked and he failed.

Posted: 8/24/2006 1:48:10 PM EDT

[#22]

he doesn't even have a printer.

'doesn't this computer-thingy do any printing itself?'

Posted: 8/24/2006 2:01:27 PM EDT

[#23]

well since this is obviously a billable call since he missed diagnosed the problem......

the correct diagnosis is.....

he is a dumbass.

Posted: 8/24/2006 2:05:43 PM EDT

[#24]

I just hope he pays up

Posted: 8/24/2006 3:34:55 PM EDT

[#25]

Well?

Posted: 8/24/2006 3:44:25 PM EDT

[#26]

The cause of the problem is:
knot in cables caused data stream to become twisted and kinked

Brought to you by the BOFH
www.cs.wisc.edu/~ballard/bofh/bofhserver.pl

Posted: 8/24/2006 3:44:53 PM EDT

[#27]

Kind of like the service call we got when I was working at a high-end stereo store back in college.

PO'd customer threw down some major bucks on a Carver amp and then complained that it would shut-off (go into protection) every time he cranked it up...

We brought it into the shop, plugged it into a pair of Heresey's that came over on the ark, cranked it up to 11 ;>, and left it on all weekend. It played flawlessly and would break windows...

He took it home and it kept shutting off every time he cranked it up again...

We sent a service technician to his house and found his amp was plugged into a "clapper" because he liked to come home, clap his hands, and turn on the stereo.

(I couldn't make this up if I tried)

Posted: 8/24/2006 3:56:16 PM EDT

[#28]

Quoted:
Kind of like the service call we got when I was working at a high-end stereo store back in college.

PO'd customer threw down some major bucks on a Carver amp and then complained that it would shut-off (go into protection) every time he cranked it up...

We brought it into the shop, plugged it into a pair of Heresey's that came over on the ark, cranked it up to 11 ;>, and left it on all weekend. It played flawlessly and would break windows...

He took it home and it kept shutting off every time he cranked it up again...

We sent a service technician to his house and found his amp was plugged into a "clapper" because he liked to come home, clap his hands, and turn on the stereo.

(I couldn't make this up if I tried)

I sure hope you are! because if you arent then I have no more hope in humanity

Posted: 8/24/2006 4:10:00 PM EDT

[#29]

The problem is obviously caused by "proprietary" 'trons of the printer (most likely an older HP model), which have been forbidden by means of an exclusionary clause in their contract, to directly communicate with the hardware that hosts the operating system.

To correct this, one must purchase, through the "archaic computer institute", an interpreter to place in between the printer and PC.

Problem solved.

Posted: 8/24/2006 4:41:34 PM EDT

[#30]

Quoted:
Kind of like the service call we got when I was working at a high-end stereo store back in college.

PO'd customer threw down some major bucks on a Carver amp and then complained that it would shut-off (go into protection) every time he cranked it up...

We brought it into the shop, plugged it into a pair of Heresey's that came over on the ark, cranked it up to 11 ;>, and left it on all weekend. It played flawlessly and would break windows...

He took it home and it kept shutting off every time he cranked it up again...

We sent a service technician to his house and found his amp was plugged into a "clapper" because he liked to come home, clap his hands, and turn on the stereo.

(I couldn't make this up if I tried)

that could be the funniest thing I've read in days (besides my paycheck)

Posted: 8/24/2006 4:43:32 PM EDT

[#31]

Quoted:
The cause of the problem is:
knot in cables caused data stream to become twisted and kinked

Brought to you by the BOFH
www.cs.wisc.edu/~ballard/bofh/bofhserver.pl

I love the BOFH.....

THe series is continued at The Register...

Posted: 8/24/2006 5:59:42 PM EDT

[#32]

I vote no printer

He just expects the CPU case to spit paper everytime he hits the print button.

Posted: 8/24/2006 6:03:17 PM EDT

[#33]

Quoted:
I love the BOFH.....

THe series is continued at The Register...

Indeed. I find myself relating to his experiences on an almost daily basis. Did not know that it was continued... will definately have to check it out.

Posted: 8/24/2006 6:18:17 PM EDT

[#34]

Was it the classic case of the user hitting the "Print Screen" button on the keyboard and nothing was happening?

Posted: 8/24/2006 6:18:27 PM EDT

[#35]

Speculating is a waste of time, but one problem that comes up from time to time is the use of passive USB extension cables. If the total length needed is more than 6 or 8 feet, an active USB cable is often necessary to prevent intermittent data transmission errors.

Posted: 8/24/2006 6:34:31 PM EDT

[#36]

Quoted:

Quoted:
pebkac

Huh?

Problem Exists Between Keyboard And Chair.

Posted: 8/24/2006 6:39:37 PM EDT

[#37]

There should be a COC violation for threads that leave you hanging for more than a certian number of hours.

Posted: 8/24/2006 6:50:06 PM EDT

[#38]

Quoted:
How many calls do you get for replacement mouse balls?I'm serious.Edit: Oh I am gonna go with no cable attached to printer for $200 Alex.

From an old, old email:

This is an actual alert to IBM Field Engineers that went out to
all IBM Branch Offices. The person who wrote it was very
serious. The rest of us guys find it rather funny.
----------------------------------------------------------------
Abstract: Mouse Balls Available as FRU (Field Replacement Unit)

Mouse balls are now available as FRU. Therefore, if a mouse
fails to operate or should it perform erratically, it may need a
ball replacement. Because of the delicate nature of this
procedure, replacement of mouse balls should only be attempted by
properly trained personnel.
Before proceeding, determine the type of mouse balls by examining
the underside of the mouse. Domestic balls will be larger and
harder than foreign balls. Ball removal procedures differ
depending upon manufacturer of the mouse. Foreign balls can be
replaced using the pop-off method. Domestic balls are replaced
using the twist-off method. Mouse balls are not usually static
sensetive. However, excessive handling can result in sudden
discharge. Upon completion of ball replacement, the mouse may be
used immediatly.
It is recommended that each replacer have a pair of spare balls
for maintaining optimum customer satisfaction, and that any
customer missing his balls should suspect local personnel of
removing these necessary items.

To re-order, specify one of the following:

P/N 33F8462 - Domestic Mouse Balls
P/N 33F8461 - Foreign Mouse Balls

Posted: 8/24/2006 7:13:39 PM EDT

[#39]

Quoted:

Quoted:
pebkac

Huh?

What's the largest support organization you've worked in? All the ones I've seen that are larger than 4-5 people have had pebkac written in big letters on a whiteboard somewhere. Now, I will say that none of the other developers who didn't work support when they were in school have no idea what it means when I say it the first time.

Posted: 8/24/2006 7:21:59 PM EDT

[#40]

BAN HIM !!

6 hours later and we are still hanging.

Posted: 8/24/2006 8:54:25 PM EDT

[#41]

He was using the laptop and the printer was on the desktop?

Posted: 8/24/2006 9:01:55 PM EDT

[#42]

So I take it that the client went crazy and killer BlackDog714....

Why else would he have not responded?

Posted: 8/24/2006 9:03:18 PM EDT

[#43]

I feel sorry for any tech that has to work in retail or deal with home users.

Posted: 8/24/2006 9:09:07 PM EDT

[#44]

Quoted:
ID-10-T

That's the error code I was voting for!

Update please!!!

Posted: 8/24/2006 9:12:54 PM EDT

[#45]

Quoted:
I feel sorry for any tech that has to work in retail or deal with home users.

You said it!! Occasionally, I'll get stopped on the sales floor by a customer, which usually results in me having a headache. And forget about the teenaged turds who want you to troubleshoot their car audio system that their "buddy" hooked up...Can you say "Fire hazard"?

And, lucky me, I do house calls too!! YOU try teaching a 90 year old senile bastard how to use a universal remote!! AAARGH!!!!!!!!!!