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11/20/2019 5:07:11 PM
Posted: 10/30/2004 6:53:06 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/30/2004 6:59:55 PM EST by Lockedon]
In 2000 we saw the election swayed by less than 600 votes. Now imagine this: What if you were at the polls this Tuesday, and you happened to scratch your ass before punching a hole into your ballot. The subsequent shit stain on the piece of paper may be mistaken by counters as a hanging chad. Now, without realizing it, your vote may have counted towards Admiral Akbar, and your long distance service has been switched to Sprint.

So, how does this make an ass scratcher a threat to the United States of America as much as Al Queda?

Stay with me now: When you (unknowingly) switched to Sprint for your long distance your rates have increased by more than 300%. The following month, when you receive the unexpected bill, you will totally flip out.
It will start by kicking your cat and shooting your dog. However, God forbid that you didn't make too many calls to your grandmother that month, because if that bill exceeds the amount of $743.59 abusing pets will not calm your rage. Psychological studies have proven that when a subject is faced with an unexpected phone bill over the amount of $743.59, they tend to totally flip out like ninjas. Subjects in this experiment have shown to take their Bushmaster bullet-hoses, and going on a fish-killing rampage. Once their firearm explodes, they take the murdered fish and stuff it in their poopers and post pics. As a result, Al Queda will attack us.

<­BR>

I can't wait for wednesday. I'm voting for bush, but I'm tired of this election, and specially all the slippery slope theories people come up with.
Poll Coming....
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 6:54:25 PM EST
No longer will the suspended shitball be classifed as a "dingleberry". From here on out, it shall bear the nomenclature "hanging chad".
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 6:55:13 PM EST
Uh, I had something like that happen. I was drinking when my cell phone went ff and they asked me to switch my mortgage over to Ditech, except that I use Geico for car insurance, right?? So then I say no, I'm not loving it, and they say, "All your money are belong to us". I flipped out and kicked my mother in law in the head.
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 6:56:48 PM EST
Someone else can inspect those chads. I'm not doing it.
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 6:58:21 PM EST
You think your tired of this election stuff? I've been home for three and a half weeks now and watching Fox News everyday. Kerry can't go away fast enough to suit me.
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 6:58:52 PM EST
A THREAD to the US?


WTF?
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:00:13 PM EST


Lockedon, you da' man
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:00:19 PM EST

Originally Posted By fight4yourrights:
A THREAD to the US?


WTF?




damnit! you know what I ment
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:00:34 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/30/2004 7:01:28 PM EST by motown_steve]
It's too bad that you don't see the threat to this nation if John Kerry is elected.

I hope that no one you know or love dies in the next 9/11.

If so, then you can blame me for suggesting that a vote for Badnarik is a vote for Kerry, and a vote to weaken America.
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:03:08 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/30/2004 7:07:17 PM EST by Lockedon]

Originally Posted By motown_steve:
If so, then you can blame me for suggesting that a vote for Badnarik is a vote for Kerry, and a vote to weaken America.




Funny, cause your sigline says "Anybody But Kerry!"

Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:11:07 PM EST

Originally Posted By Lockedon:

Originally Posted By motown_steve:
It's too bad that you don't see the threat to this nation if John Kerry is elected.

I hope that no one you know or love dies in the next 9/11.

If so, then you can blame me for suggesting that a vote for Badnarik is a vote for Kerry, and a vote to weaken America.




Funny, cause your sigline says "Anyone but Kerry"



And there's only one person with half a chance, George W. Bush.

I'm not a Republican, and to be honest, I don't think all that highly of Bush. But I do know that Bush has kept this nation safe since 9/11.

The Left cam out with the slogan Anybody But Bush, to show that no matter who the Democratic cantidate was, the left would support him. Anybody but Kerry means that no one in this election is a worse option than Kerry. If Kerry wins, then America WILL suffer! People who choose to vote for Badnarik know that he has a 0.000% chance of getting a single electoral vote, but that their votes could help keep Kerry out of the White House.

Like I said, I hope no one close to you gets their name chiselled on a memorial.
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:12:29 PM EST

Originally Posted By Lockedon:

Originally Posted By fight4yourrights:
A THREAD to the US?


WTF?




damnit! you know what I ment




Yeah, I did. But somebody had to bust your balls.

BTW - the Poll is still screwed.
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:12:42 PM EST
What if you scratch your ass and get some "cling on" (or klingon for those ST folks) stuck under your finger nail. What if you scratch an ass hair off and it falls onto the ballot? What then? I see an all out thermo-nuclear fart attack at the polling place. One of those attacks from the bottom of your shorts, that warms the entire seat of the pants, and gets dragged across the room and attacks everyone at the same time.
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:14:51 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/30/2004 7:16:58 PM EST by Lockedon]

Originally Posted By motown_steve:

Originally Posted By Lockedon:

Originally Posted By motown_steve:
It's too bad that you don't see the threat to this nation if John Kerry is elected.

I hope that no one you know or love dies in the next 9/11.

If so, then you can blame me for suggesting that a vote for Badnarik is a vote for Kerry, and a vote to weaken America.




Funny, cause your sigline says "Anyone but Kerry"



And there's only one person with half a chance, George W. Bush.

I'm not a Republican, and to be honest, I don't think all that highly of Bush. But I do know that Bush has kept this nation safe since 9/11.

The Left cam out with the slogan Anybody But Bush, to show that no matter who the Democratic cantidate was, the left would support him. Anybody but Kerry means that no one in this election is a worse option than Kerry. If Kerry wins, then America WILL suffer! People who choose to vote for Badnarik know that he has a 0.000% chance of getting a single electoral vote, but that their votes could help keep Kerry out of the White House.

Like I said, I hope no one close to you gets their name chiselled on a memorial.




I don't disagree with you.....Slippery Slope arguments just annoy the crap out of me. Lighten up man!

Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:18:43 PM EST
[Last Edit: 10/30/2004 7:19:56 PM EST by motown_steve]

Originally Posted By Lockedon:
I can't wait for wednesday. I'm voting for bush, but I'm tired of this election, and specially all the slippery slope theories people come up with.



Where's the slippery slope in my post? What reprecussions did I suggest for people who vote for Badnarik?

I can't wait for Wednesday either.
Link Posted: 10/30/2004 7:35:33 PM EST
.
Link Posted: 10/31/2004 12:31:53 AM EST

HA!! I think the good 'ol Admiral Ackbar is going to get written in for some of the local elections on Tuesday. We always have a few democrat incumbents running unopposed in the local elections.

Link Posted: 10/31/2004 12:35:49 AM EST
"It's Kerry's Fault".

Colt_SBR
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