Okay, I can't believe I'm posting this. I got it in my email this morning. It was attributed to Andy Rooney, which is false. Here's the Snopes link.
That said, it's still a good essay. I guess I'll just wait patiently until my wife is 40.
I know nothing "magical" will happen when the odometer finally ratchets up to 40, as it's more a state of mind than anything, but I'm waiting nonetheless.
As I grow in age, I value women who are over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:
A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.
If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do. And, it's usually something more interesting.
A woman over 40 knows herself well enough! to be assured in who she is, what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the
age of 40 give a hoot what you might think about her or what she's doing.
Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.
Older women are generous! with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated. A woman over 40 has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends. A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Women over 40 couldn't care less if you're attracted to her friends because she knows her friends won't betray her.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40. They always know.
A woman over 40 looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of younger women. Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40
is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off if you are a jerk, if you are acting like one! You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.
Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed hot woman of 40+, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year-old waitress.
Ladies, I apologize.
For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free", here's an update for you. Now 80% of women are against marriage, ! why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage.
Of course, Ronnie McDowell said the same thing years before when he penned "Older Women," which has always been one of my favorite songs.
Benny Hill used to sing, "Give me an older woman, every time, every time. They don't scream, they don't tell and they're grateful as hell..." Yup, yup, yup!
Wow, finally some truth.
For all the good it does.
"For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free", here's an update for you. Now 80% of women are against marriage, ! why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage."
"Benny Hill used to sing, "Give me an older woman, every time, every time. They don't scream, they don't tell and they're grateful as hell...""
That is BS!