The race problem in this country would not disappear. Because you can't legislate people into being something they are not. But I would do away with the hyphenated-american names.

I would do away with hate crime laws. Any law that protects a single group. We have enough laws to cover everybody.

Do away with protection laws like: seatbelts, carseats, helmet laws, etc.

I would instruct the scientific world to find a cure for homosexualality. This certainly is a desease and not a choice. I think part of the desease is not realizing you have a desease.

And of course gun laws would almost cease to exsist.

And all this would take place on my first day. [:)]

I would build my ASSET column!

Man, what a good book!!

opens your eyes very quickly.

I'm gonna rent out my upstairs. It will cover my mortgage. My house will no longer be a liability

Can I be Secretary of State or something!?  Hell, even a scribe sounds good in your regime!

I would address far more important issues facing this nation !

For example, I would instantly order that all magazine publishers must number each and every page in their magazines or face the prospect of either death or living for 90 days in a public housing project !  
(Yeah, yeah, I know they would all choose death but I'd givem a choice.)

How about finding a cure for homophobia!  Let me guess the unlisted proclaimation:

All those who have different religous views than I shall be "corrected".

There's already a cure for Homophobia, but unfortunately, it would cost way to much money to ship all the fags to that deserted island!!

Homophobia is a word coined by fags to describe straight people.

Along with all articles must be completed without having to refer to page 76.

LOL!!! Now THAT'S funny.


If I were king....

1. The police would give out speeding tickets to people driving slower than the speed limit. Speed limits are REDICULOUSLY low. People who don't speed are a danger to those of us who do.

2. One out of every ten lawyers would be shot. One out of every ten criminals would be buried alive with these lawyers. How can this work??? Everyone knows there is almost EXACTLY the same # of lawyers as criminals. Odd how that works.

3. People who leave the copier lid up would be subject to having to put their fingers down on the copier glass, and having a co-worker  smash the lid down on their fingers 3 times.

Well, that's an ambitious enuf agenda for the first morning of my kingship, so I'd take the rest of the day off.

Oh yeah, I'd abolish BATF, HUD, NEA and the Elks. On general principles.

That's it.

And I'd hire somebody to type my posts here for me, so my spelling wouldn't be so crappy.

That's it.

if you were king, first we'd ask you to abdicate. if you refuse, we'll depose you. if you resist, we'll have to kill you, cause this is the US of A and we dont have kings.