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9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 2/22/2006 7:39:41 AM EDT
I got home last evening and put some corn-dogs in the microwave. Sat down to check my e-mail and pulled my 1911 out of the holster and laid it on the desk.

When my corndogs were done I walked over an got them out of the microwave. I then saw the flip top squeze mustard bottle sitting on the counter and carried it back to my seat along with the corndogs.

When I went to squeeze out some mustard....nothing happened. Ah-ha , it has some dried mustard in the opening......looking at the hole in the top of the mustard bottle....I squeezed.......AAAHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGG......I now have a face full of mustard and mustard in my eyes. Shit , shit, shit! It stings, it stings!!

I've done some dumb shit in my life, but shooting myself in the face with mustard ranks right up there with the dumbest!

Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:40:21 AM EDT
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:41:06 AM EDT




BTDT
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:41:26 AM EDT
Glock or Ploch mustard?
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:41:53 AM EDT
i thought i heard the sound of a woman screaming last night.

glad your are ok
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:44:06 AM EDT
did you swallow?
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:45:55 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 7:46:39 AM EDT by silascobb]

Originally Posted By pcsutton:
Sat down to check my e-mail and pulled my 1911 out of the holster and laid it on the desk.



Nice hook! I was waiting for the "face and eyes full of mustard, I grabbed at the desk and [BOOM]"
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:47:30 AM EDT

Originally Posted By silascobb:

Originally Posted By pcsutton:
Sat down to check my e-mail and pulled my 1911 out of the holster and laid it on the desk.



Nice hook! I was waiting for the "face and eyes full of mustard, I grabbed at the desk and [BOOM]"


+1
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:53:31 AM EDT
so..... you shot it all over yourself?


was it a full power shot?
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 7:58:21 AM EDT
BAN MUSTARD!........................for the Children.

Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:00:57 AM EDT
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:02:03 AM EDT
Nocturnal Discharge? What are you, twelve?
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:03:30 AM EDT
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:04:58 AM EDT
mustard bukake
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:12:19 AM EDT
Watch that muzzle!
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:17:05 AM EDT
THAT, gentlemen, is why we wear eye protection at all times!
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:17:56 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 8:31:35 AM EDT by _DR]
Remember, only YOU can prevent negligent condiment discharges!

1. There is no such thing as half-full or empty condiment squeeze bottle - always treat them like they are loaded!

2. Maintain good nozzle discipline at all times - Never, ever point a loaded comdiment squeeze bottle at anyone or anything you do not intend to squirt!

3. Do not squeeze the condiment squeeze bottle until you have the comestible in your sights!

4. Never ever look into the business end of a loaded condiment squeeze bottle while squeezing!


Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:27:07 AM EDT

Originally Posted By _DR:
Remember, only YOU can prevent negligent condiment discharges!

1. There is no such thing as half-full cor empty condiment squeeze bottle - always treat them like they are loaded!

2. Maintain good nozzle discipline at all times - Never, ever point a loaded comdiment squeeze bottle at anyone or anything you do not intend to squirt!

3. Do not squeeze the condiment squeeze bottle until you have the comestible in your sights!

4. Never ever look into the business end of a loaded condiment squeeze bottle while squeezing!





With your permission, I'll be printing that out and posting it on the refer door.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:30:35 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 8:31:44 AM EDT by _DR]

Originally Posted By pcsutton:

Originally Posted By _DR:
Remember, only YOU can prevent negligent condiment discharges!

1. There is no such thing as half-full or empty condiment squeeze bottle - always treat them like they are loaded!

2. Maintain good nozzle discipline at all times - Never, ever point a loaded comdiment squeeze bottle at anyone or anything you do not intend to squirt!

3. Do not squeeze the condiment squeeze bottle until you have the comestible in your sights!

4. Never ever look into the business end of a loaded condiment squeeze bottle while squeezing!





With your permission, I'll be printing that out and posting it on the refer door.



Of course
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:34:02 AM EDT

Originally Posted By macman37:
Nocturnal Discharge? What are you, twelve?



Na.. he peeked at Jason's latest pic's in the Team forum and got stickey shorts from it.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:37:40 AM EDT
Good thing Glock does not make mustard. The KB would have coated much more than just your face.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:37:51 AM EDT

Originally Posted By BillofRights:
BAN MUSTARD!........................for the Children.





+a gazillion


Evil mustard, simply evil. Mothers Against Mustard rise up!
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:38:46 AM EDT

Originally Posted By silascobb:

Originally Posted By pcsutton:
Sat down to check my e-mail and pulled my 1911 out of the holster and laid it on the desk.



Nice hook! I was waiting for the "face and eyes full of mustard, I grabbed at the desk and [BOOM]"



+1
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:41:48 AM EDT
You know somehow, in some way this is Bush's fault
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:44:32 AM EDT
Good thing no one was hurt. I'm sure the damage will buff right out!
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:44:36 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Wraithtouch:
You know somehow, in some way this is Bush's fault



You think? I was going to blame it on the Danish newspaper cartoonists.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 8:45:58 AM EDT

Originally Posted By _DR:

Originally Posted By Wraithtouch:
You know somehow, in some way this is Bush's fault



You think? I was going to blame it on the Danish newspaper cartoonists.


Didnt ya hear? Bush commissioned those cartoons thats his fault too.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 9:24:56 AM EDT
At first I though I had become a victim of the Evil Halliburton Mustard Machine....but then the realization of my own stupidity sank in...
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 9:35:44 AM EDT
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 9:39:42 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 9:39:57 AM EDT by DonD]
I hope you don`t do press checks while looking down the barrel of your 1911.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 10:51:28 AM EDT
Why did you have the safety off?? Not smart.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 12:47:03 PM EDT

Originally Posted By 10mmFan:
Why did you have the safety off?? Not smart.



It was one of them 'squeze-cockers'!
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 12:55:52 PM EDT

IT BURNS!!!!!!!!!
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 1:00:53 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 1:01:13 PM EDT by DonD]

Originally Posted By photokirk:
www.peppersandsmoke.com/temp/mustardmanbig.jpg
IT BURNS!!!!!!!!!




Link Posted: 2/22/2006 1:10:12 PM EDT
Don't beat yourself up, dude.

That was obviously a accidental discharge and not a negligent discharge, due to a faulty design of the mustard bottle.

(Although your maintenance of the weap ...... I mean the mustard bottle does leave something to be desired).

I don't want to sound preachy, but you'll think twice the next time you pick up that mustard bottle, won't you?



Link Posted: 2/22/2006 1:13:04 PM EDT
You had me going there for a minute.

I was wondering if the shit storm had begun yet.

Danny
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 1:13:18 PM EDT
Ya right, it was probably mayo (get it?)

Link Posted: 2/22/2006 1:13:34 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Lockedon:
did you swallow?



that is fricken funny!
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 1:16:11 PM EDT

Originally Posted By macman37:
Nocturnal Discharge? What are you, twelve?



....and he put that on his corndog and ate it?
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 1:28:06 PM EDT

Originally Posted By James23:
Don't beat yourself up, dude.

That was obviously a accidental discharge and not a negligent discharge, due to a faulty design of the mustard bottle.

(Although your maintenance of the weap ...... I mean the mustard bottle does leave something to be desired).

I don't want to sound preachy, but you'll think twice the next time you pick up that mustard bottle, won't you?






Now, I'm skeered of mustard. I'll just settle for ketchup from now on.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 1:52:26 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 1:53:38 PM EDT by Carter226]
I somewhat took this from _DR's post:







Remember Nozzle awareness is key, you never want to squirt your fries when you ment to squirt your burger...


ETA: yes I didnt spell children correctly but you get the point.
Link Posted: 2/22/2006 4:37:59 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 2/22/2006 4:38:38 PM EDT by pcsutton]
The middle picture SCARED me!! That's exactly what it looked like when it went off!!


OH THE HUMANITY!!
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