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Posted: 9/5/2005 11:54:56 AM EDT
Do the useful idiots, the moonbats, and the main street media ever stop to think about the absurdity of their cries -- of what Bush "should have" done? Here is how such a sequence of events might have unfolded........


...And George Bush strode through the midst of the vehicles, and the force of his being caused the  traffic to ease, and the evacuation route was cleared, and the people were overjoyed; and as  George Bush passed among the vehicles, to each he touched the cars, upon his left and his right;  and each car that was touched did find its fuel tank filled.

In the day of the Great Storm, George Bush did direct his pilot to drop him in the very face of the maelstrom: George Bush stood at the edge of the winds and the raging sea and stared into the black heart of Katrina; and hurling himself into the air, he did do battle with the storm, and strove mightily with it; and the storm relented, and decreased to Category 3, and veered away to the East;

And in that time a cry went up from among the city, that the levees had broken. And George Bush did make haste unto the levees and did hurl himself unto the breach; and the strength of his sinews was as of steel, and he did force together the sundered ends, and the breach did heal, and the Waters of Pontchartrain were restored;

And again a cry went up from the Superdome, where the people did suffer heat and thirst and depravity; and George Bush unyoked the roof of the Superdome, and uplifting his arms in supplication, he did cause a refreshing cool rain to fall upon the people, and they were cleansed, and their thirst sated, and their filth washed away; and then he caused a break in the clouds, and from thence came magic rays of sunshine, to fill the people's hearts with joy.

And in that day the city was given unto much lawlessness, and the people did cry for deliverance from brutish cruelty; and George Bush did cause a great stone to fall from the sky, and shatter into ten thousand fragments; and from each of those fragments did grow a soldier of the National Guard, and the soldiers formed into companies, and the companies did disperse unto the city, and there they slew the evildoers; for George Bush had brought them forth from nothingness in but mere moments.

And then George Bush did meet with the mayor of the city, and he laid hands upon him, and in that hour the mayor grew a new pair, and was glad; and in like manner did George Bush meet with the governoress, and comforted her, and at the sound of his word, competence formed within her and began to grow, and she did not need to rely on the kindness of strangers;

And at George Bush's word of command, the Buses of Nagin did roar to life, and to proceed to evacuation points; and having filled themselves with refugees, the buses did direct themselves out from the stricken land and unto the promised land of Texas;

And George Bush contemplated the flooded city, and his heart grew heavy with sadness; and in that day George Bush took up the mighty Staff of Halliburton, and did wield it; and he stretched forth the Staff against the waters, and the toxic stew did withdraw, and the trapped people did escape; and the plasma TVs were recovered, and the Nike sneakers were found in saleable condition, and the items of jewelry were returned intact to their display cases, and the DVDs were restored to the Wal-Mart shelves, and food and drink were brought unto the needy;

And taking up again the Staff of Halliburton, George Bush held it aloft over the tortured lands; and then with great power he did bring the Staff down again, and with it he smote the ground mightily in his anger; and the earth shuddered and the land did groan; and then went forth from that spot a mighty rumbling as of thunder; and to the wonderment of the people, the city did begin to rise from the depths of the sea and the delta; and the levees were renewed, and the seawall mounted toward the heavens, and the buildings did frame the skyline.

And when all the lands were successfully restored, and the people successfully healed, and the dislocated successfully reunited ... George Bush did stand forth to accept the heavy burden of blame as a Miserable Failure, as stipulated by the mainstream media; and George Bush did accept the yoke of shame and was impeached, and the GOP was disbanded, and liberal apologism flowered once again, and the vast right-wing conspiracy was exposed, and democrats were brought again to power, and the blind sheep were satisfied; and John Kerry did assume unto himself the mantle of leadership, and the people were restored, and air did clear, and there was peace throughout all the lands.


Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:07:31 PM EDT
[#1]
So why didn't he do all this?  We all know he could have if he wanted to.
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:08:01 PM EDT
[#2]
"The mighty Staff of Halliburton"
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:13:49 PM EDT
[#3]

Quoted:
So why didn't he do all this?  We all know he could have if he wanted to.


But had he done it, no one would have learned.
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:18:06 PM EDT
[#4]

Quoted:

Quoted:
So why didn't he do all this?  We all know he could have if he wanted to.


But had he done it, no one would have learned.



But why would anybody want to learn?  I mean, if you learn from your mistakes, you might not have the chance at a near death experience the next time.  
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:18:54 PM EDT
[#5]
I'll give you fitty cents to post that on DU.......
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:20:38 PM EDT
[#6]

Quoted:
I'll give you fitty cents to post that on DU.......



I'll up the bid to $1.
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:26:00 PM EDT
[#7]

Quoted:

Quoted:
I'll give you fitty cents to post that on DU.......



I'll up the bid to $1.




Tree Fitty here.
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:29:59 PM EDT
[#8]
Fo Fitty.
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:42:22 PM EDT
[#9]
From DUh

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Anybody got an account with them?  
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 12:45:03 PM EDT
[#10]
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 1:09:30 PM EDT
[#11]


That's the funniest thing I've seen in a long time!
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 1:19:32 PM EDT
[#12]
Sarcasm as an art form. I thought I was the only one who could do an epic like that.
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 1:29:16 PM EDT
[#13]
Well done KA3B, well done!!
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 5:52:53 PM EDT
[#14]
BZ!
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 5:57:16 PM EDT
[#15]
Too funny.
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 6:00:38 PM EDT
[#16]
See, I knew it was all a plot to make Halliburton, and therefore Dick Cheney, rich!
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 6:02:37 PM EDT
[#17]
Yeeeeaaaaaah!
Link Posted: 9/5/2005 6:14:59 PM EDT
[#18]
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