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9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 5/21/2003 5:42:30 PM EDT
I don't write 'em, I just pass 'em along. -A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking. -Dijon vu - the same mustard as before. -Practice safe eating - always use condiments. -Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death. -A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy. -A hangover is the wrath of grapes. -Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play. -Sea captains don't like crew cuts. -Does the name Pavlov ring a bell? -Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion. -Reading while sunbathing makes you well red. -When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I. -What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway.) -In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes. -She had a boyfriend with a wooden leg, but broke it off. -A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. -If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed. -With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress. -Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft, and I'll show you A flat minor. -When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds. -The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered. -A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart. -You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it. -Every calendar's days are numbered. -A lot of money is tainted - It t'aint yours and it t'aint mine. -A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat. -He had a photographic memory that was never developed. -Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. -Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall. -Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis. -Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses. -Acupuncture is a jab well done.
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