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Posted: 1/4/2003 7:56:54 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/4/2003 8:11:45 PM EDT by lordtrader]
When you can't stand criticsm you learn to be a profectionist.
It's human to make mistakes and to feel incomplete. Perhaps if we were all smooth plastic printouts we could expect perfection of ourselves. Each man is actually a process. We are not things but events-happenings-and the events are all still unfolding. These are our creative spritual adventures.
We have somehow learned that the openness to criticism is dangerous. Prehaps we thought someone would not like us if we were wrong, or that we would get hurt or belittled. When we live with a relationship to our HIGHER POWER, we can stand up for ourselves. A man has a right to make some mistakes! We grow more if we allow ourselves the leeway of simply being in process.
I will not askto have the power of peerfection. I will only ask that I not be alone in the process of living my life.

Sometimes when we pray, a remarkable thing happens: We find the means, ways,and energies to perform tasks far beyond our capacities."

Coping sucessfully with lifes minor annoyances and fustrations is sometimes the most difficult skill we have to learn. We are faced with small inconvenieces daily.. From untangling the knots in our childrens shoelaces to standing in line at the market, our days are filled withminor difficulties that we must somehow deal with.

If we're not careful, we may find ourselves dealing with these difficulties by bullying  our way through each problem or grinding our teeth while giving ourselves a stern lecture about how we should handle them. These are extreme examples of poor coping skills, but even if we'reot this bad theres probably room for improvement.

Each Time life presents us with another little setback to our daily plans, we can simply take a deep breath and talk to the God of our Understanding. Knowing we can draw patience, tolerance, or whatever we need dfrom that Power, we find ourselves coping better and smiling more often.

I will take a deep breath and talk to my God whenever fustrated........

SO what brings me to all this. First of all it was my Birthday Jan 2nd. Cakes and cards from kids. Cards and a dishwasher from my parents that I wanted to buy. It was great, BUt I was a complete ASS HOLE. I was waiting for this part and that part to come for my guns that it took over my life. Like the disease I have for anything I touch or do....YOU see thats what makes me an addict.
I was told so many stories this last month and then had this promised it would be here this weekend that I sat around and didn't even acknowledge my family.....I was in the Grips for Pure Satisfaction for my AR10 Upper and my Stripped Lower. So there I was watching for the UPS man like I did the Drug man to drop off,
What the Fuck am I doing, Then the stories flow problem with this problem with that...But it is taken care of and you should have it Today.........SO kids no movies I got to make a run to see if the UPS is on the way. Here eat some of these cheese rolls with Corn and stringbeens.
NO show now I am shaking now I am pissed, now I am sad. Sad more than anything because of other things I have also learned about,.

This calls for a drink.....YEA RIGHT A DRINK...Bull SHit this calls for getting on your knees and asking my Higher power what the Fuck AM I doing. Why am I trying to control things I have no control over.
Who Knows Maybe its a Holiday weekend and the party didn't realize it would not get to me by today. Monday is always another day, But should I really care anymore.....Could this be a curse that gives me the constant memory I didn't suceed in my duties has a FDNY/EMS officer and safe anyone. So maybe it's only going to be the lower I will always have to look at has a incomplete save on 911.

Blue ink-Black ink resign the FFL no sweat I could handle that so maybe in another week or so I will have my stripped Lower.

But you know what......This has been my life since CHristmas..My wife asking where my presents are I ordered and why well never mind that. It's all in Gods hands at this point.

I want to thank everyone who is helping me understand why things like this happen....I keep forgetting the world isn't what it was when I grew up. Thank God I have refound the importance in my HIGHER POWER. SO that was the true lession if I get nothing else out of this.


[blue]per your request, post moved to GD forum[/blue]

Link Posted: 1/4/2003 8:03:54 PM EDT
If you can't forgive yourself you can't expect anyone else to.

Just take it one day at a time ... and focus on what's most important.  And it isn't things!

Happy belated Birthday!  [:D]
Link Posted: 1/4/2003 8:58:30 PM EDT
First - Happy birthday, I'm getting a little shitty on my birthday now that I've got a few extra years n - Don't sweat it.

Now, My son Juggernaut and I had a great time talking to you at the BRC.  And if I remember correctly from the Media Blast we all participated in, you were injured on 9/11 by a collapsing building while advancing in the face of danger to administer aid to whom ever might need it with out regard for your personal safety.  You are alive while many of your brothers perished.  

You aren't dead for a reason.  Don't feel guilty about being labeled a Hero by us, your peers and friends.

God has a plan for you, and we aren't worthy even to attempt to guess what His will is for us so we just have to turn loose and take one day at a time.  Yesterday is gone and tomorrow will be here soon enough, so savor today while you can.  God bless you EDP - you've been through hell - but you're a survivor - for a reason.

Now in regards to the missing/un-delivered parts - Christmas  postal service put a big dent in some of my orders.  If you've got promises and no delivery, perhaps you should let us know who's done you wrong - unless you can convince them to straighten it out pronto. Bad press seems to go along way.  It always figures, the thing you want most is delayed the longest - Remember...patience is a virtue (God gave us children to teach us that little lesson)

Hang is there brother!

Oh and what DK-Prof said too!

Link Posted: 1/5/2003 1:54:26 PM EDT
Holidays are stressful times.  Relax and balance your family, responsibility and hobby time appropriately.

Tomorrow's another day!
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