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Posted: 10/11/2005 3:00:59 PM EDT
It sure made my wife's @ss expand x3 over the years and then there's her friend Suzie.  She just got married about four months ago.  When she was single and while she was engaged she had a @ss that was worthy of framing and now,.........,<sighs>..................
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:01:35 PM EDT


this is gonna be good.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:04:57 PM EDT
I think you mean "butt" with two "T"'s.

I've heard that putting a ring on a woman's finger is like pulling the lanyard on a life raft: PFFFFFFFFT!

As soon as I married my ex, she quit her job, cut her hair, and gained twenty pounds.  
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:05:21 PM EDT
Its called D.W.S.-Dependent Wife Syndrom. Very prevelent in the military.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:05:44 PM EDT
You speak of the topic that shall not be mentioned.

Time to hide.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:05:51 PM EDT
Butt and or gut.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:07:37 PM EDT
Maybe you're bad in the sack and she's trying to make herself unattractive to you?



Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:09:24 PM EDT

Quoted:
I've heard that putting a ring on a woman's finger is like pulling the lanyard on a life raft: PFFFFFFFFT!  



So it's not just me......
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:10:13 PM EDT
My ife is about 5 lbs heavier than when we met 20 years ago. ( 5'7" 115# )
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:10:36 PM EDT
It also shuts their cooter off.  Or something........
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:11:13 PM EDT
Some say one bite of wedding cakes sucks thier desire  for sex out of thier soul.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:20:11 PM EDT

Quoted:
Some say one bite of wedding cakes sucks thier desire  for sex out of thier soul.



Oh no, she still wants sex when she doesn't have something going on with her thyroid or something.  About once a every other month or so she'll squeeze into some lingerie that would otherwise look sexy and........  and......... well you don't want to know really.

Don't get me wrong, I still love my wife but damn........
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:21:05 PM EDT

Quoted:
now,.........,<sighs>..................



Then she was shoved ass first down a chimney?
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:25:16 PM EDT

Quoted:
I think you mean "butt" with two "T"'s.

I've heard that putting a ring on a woman's finger is like pulling the lanyard on a life raft: PFFFFFFFFT!

As soon as I married my ex, she quit her job, cut her hair, and gained twenty pounds.



LOL!

And severely cut back on the oral gratification!

Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:28:15 PM EDT
Yet another reason to never get married.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:28:22 PM EDT
After 5 years of marriage my friend's wife wanted bigger boobs and he suggested she wipe toliet paper between her breast and she asked how that would make her boobs bigger. He said he didn't know but it sure worked on her a$$.

Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:29:34 PM EDT
No more so than Marriage makes a man's gut grow.
Get over yourself, Skippy.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:31:00 PM EDT
NO!

Married 16+ years. Out of respect for ourselves and each other we refuse to turn into fat bastards. Love our beer, love our food, but exercise daily to keep it in shape. She is 41, produced two great children, and I can still bounce a quarter off her ass!
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:31:11 PM EDT

Quoted:
After 5 years of marriage my friend's wife wanted bigger boobs and he suggested she wipe toliet paper between her breast and she asked how that would make her boobs bigger. He said he didn't know but it sure worked on her a$$.




Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:31:24 PM EDT
Wait till they have children.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:32:02 PM EDT
If you think about it this is just more proof that there is no god.  If there was who made man in his own image, then when we got married our wives boobs would grow instead of their butts.

How'd that be...........
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:35:38 PM EDT
Mrs. FLAL1A has blimped up like nobody's business. She must have put on 3, maybe 4 ounces since I married her 22+ years ago. I guess they just go on a lifelong feeding frenzy once they're hitched.

I don't think I'd complain if she picked up 5 - 8 lbs. of ass.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:40:02 PM EDT
tag
wifes awake
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:41:15 PM EDT
Only if she takes a ton of laxatives ...
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:41:55 PM EDT
marriage=mega sized posterier
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:42:57 PM EDT
Welcome to marriage. I swear Mrs Pony loves Blue Bell Ice Cream more than she loves me...and I'm about to let Blue Bell have her too
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:46:52 PM EDT

Quoted:
After 5 years of marriage my friend's wife wanted bigger boobs and he suggested she wipe toliet paper between her breast and she asked how that would make her boobs bigger. He said he didn't know but it sure worked on her a$$.






we need pics of the friend to decide
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:48:04 PM EDT
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:51:07 PM EDT




Actually my wife's ass shrunk.  She loses 10 pounds after having a kid.  8 more and she'll be a super model.  
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:52:38 PM EDT
My wife's butt (whole body) is worthy of a trophy! We've been married 11 years and I still get a
chubby just thinking about her. She's 40, but she has the body of a 25 year old. She's at the gym
5 day per week, 2 hours per day. TIGHT!
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:54:28 PM EDT
I dunno, but Taco Bell sure makes my butt explode.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 3:55:36 PM EDT
thank god we have these threads so i wont want to get married
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 4:17:28 PM EDT

Quoted:

Quoted:
I think you mean "butt" with two "T"'s.

I've heard that putting a ring on a woman's finger is like pulling the lanyard on a life raft: PFFFFFFFFT!

As soon as I married my ex, she quit her job, cut her hair, and gained twenty pounds.



LOL!

And severely cut back on the oral gratification!




nomarriage.com/marriedsex.html  


I can remember my last blowjob like it was yesterday. Actually it was six years ago the day before I got married. Sex then was four to five times a week. Now I have a four year old son who sleeps in my bed with my wife more nights a week than I do. Sex now maybe once a month. Triple that for vacation sex. I have noticed that the rate goes up for a short period of time but drops off quickly when large purchases are made (house, Landrover, shopping sprees, new floors, etc). I am thirty eight, not happy, and slowly methodically plotting my way out. I always love the look in the eyes of my friends who say that won't happen to them.



My wife reached a point where she only uses sex to get something, and she doesn't happen to want anything at the moment.



My GF was damn good to me, in and out of the sack. We probably had sex, on average, 10-15 times a week. Anywhere and everywhere. Even a once a day BJ on average. Things were great.

That was, until we got married. A day later, everything had changed. Got it once on the honeymoon, and she told me to "hurry up and finish". When I ask her why she never initiates anything, never even flirts anymore, when she used to before, she says "I was trying to get you to marry me then".




I walked into a large bedroom when my wife was changing into her outfit to get on the plane to start our honeymoon, admired her gorgeous half-naked figure with a 'you wanna knock one out right here and now' look on my face, and she said, "Oh, no. None of that nonsense. We're married now." I mean she changed *instantly* from this funny happy woman into this scheming bitch who just had plans to buy and redecorate a big house and throw parties in it with my money.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 4:20:51 PM EDT
Marriage doesn't do it - not caring about one's appearance does.  But then again - judging from oft-posted range photos on this board - just a many men have joined the Big Gut, Flaccid Butt crew.

CWO
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 4:22:58 PM EDT
My wife lost weight since we were married, she was about 115 then & about 108 now at 5' 3".
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 4:23:12 PM EDT
I think it's a combination of a wedding band and wedding cake myself.

Danny
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 4:27:47 PM EDT
My wife's gained about 2 pounds in the last 11 years. She still gets carded!

I've gained and lost more than her whole body weight x10 over the same time span. Good bthing my kids are on the kind end of the gene pool.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 4:32:13 PM EDT
It's all in the jeans  er... jenes.  My wife is one of the few fortunates that is lighter now than when she married me.  She is so small our new doctor in our new town asked if she had an eating disorder.  Actually, she eats as much as me I told him.  Of her five sisters, the "fat" ones in her family are what most would call normal.

ETA: 118 lbs at 5'9".  123 when I married her.  165 lbs max when pregant (and no stretch marks ).

Kent
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 5:34:20 PM EDT

Quoted:
It sure made my wife's @ss expand x3 over the years and then there's her friend Suzie.  She just got married about four months ago.  When she was single and while she was engaged she had a @ss that was worthy of framing and now,.........,<sighs>..................



Would that be two or three axe handles wide?
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 5:38:24 PM EDT
Anyone know why brides are always smiling when they walk down the aisle?

Because they know they have given their last blowjob!!!!!!!!!!!
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 5:47:09 PM EDT
Man...This hit close to home.

I married a size 6 and now she's a size 12 and still growing.

Not what I expected at all.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 5:49:49 PM EDT
What?!?!?!

2 pages and no pics!!!



Travis
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 5:55:25 PM EDT
A guy at work said that his wife went from "Girls Gone Wild" to "Girls Gone WIDE" almost immediately after marriage.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 5:57:30 PM EDT

Quoted:
A guy at work said that his wife went from "Girls Gone Wild" to "Girls Gone WIDE" almost immediately after marriage.



LMAO

What a sad thread...
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 5:57:56 PM EDT
I'll take one for the team, and find out. I'm getting married next Friday
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 6:02:33 PM EDT

Quoted:
NO!

Married 16+ years. Out of respect for ourselves and each other we refuse to turn into fat bastards. Love our beer, love our food, but exercise daily to keep it in shape. She is 41, produced two great children, and I can still bounce a quarter off her ass!



+1

Neither hubby or I have turned into fat bastards (+11 years married).  
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 6:04:59 PM EDT
We could end world hunger tomorrow ....

All you'd have to do is air drop wedding cake over these starving countries and voila'....one bite should be good for an extra 50-60+ lbs.



Link Posted: 10/11/2005 6:41:18 PM EDT
Ooops, never mind...

Link Posted: 10/11/2005 6:45:04 PM EDT

Quoted:

Quoted:
now,.........,<sighs>..................



Then she was shoved ass first down a chimney?



Link Posted: 10/11/2005 6:47:11 PM EDT
My wifes plumped up a bit.  Actually quite nicely.
Link Posted: 10/11/2005 6:51:28 PM EDT
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