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Posted: 11/11/2003 10:53:44 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 11/11/2003 11:04:03 PM EDT by Searcherfortruth]
It seems that 99% of them are giving the rest a bad name.

That's a joke a 72 yr old War vet told me today. No ofense meant to any lawyers on the board, as I know your all the 1 %er's.
Link Posted: 11/11/2003 11:02:06 PM EDT
For whatever this opinion is worth...
I liked the joke. Thanks.
Link Posted: 11/11/2003 11:04:45 PM EDT
Your welcome.
Link Posted: 11/11/2003 11:08:30 PM EDT
Link Posted: 11/11/2003 11:18:41 PM EDT
Good one I just sent it to my son to check out first thing in the morning!...I hope he's a 1%er!
Link Posted: 11/12/2003 2:10:54 AM EDT
Let us know what he thought of it.

Paging ETH, paging ETH.
Link Posted: 11/12/2003 2:24:13 AM EDT
What happens when a lawyer takes viagra?

He grows taller!

All in good fun
Link Posted: 11/12/2003 2:53:28 AM EDT
I can't resist. I love lawyer jokes!

What’s the difference between a lawyer and an onion?
You cry when you cut up an onion.

A restaurant full of lawyers was held hostage.
The bad guys threatened that, until all their demands were met, they would release one lawyer every hour.

Link Posted: 11/12/2003 3:59:46 AM EDT
Link Posted: 11/14/2003 5:56:14 PM EDT
This one just needs to be laughed at some more. I still think it's pretty funny after 4 days. Ahahahaha!
Link Posted: 11/15/2003 7:54:10 AM EDT
Lawyer Hunting Regulations!
Government Department of Fish and "WildLife" Sec. 1200

1. Any person with a valid hunting license may harvest attorneys.

2. Taking of attorneys with traps or deadfalls is permitted. The use of currency as bait is prohibited.

3. Killing of attorneys with a vehicle is prohibited. If accidentally struck, remove dead attorney to roadside and proceed to nearest car wash.

4. It is unlawful to chase, herd, or harvest attorneys from a snow machine, helicopter, or aircraft.
5. It shall be unlawful to shout "whiplash", "ambulance", or "free Perrier" for the purpose of trapping attorneys.

6. It shall be unlawful to hunt attorneys within 100 yards of BMW

7. It shall be unlawful to hunt attorneys within 200 yards of courtrooms, law libraries, whorehouses, health spas, gay bars, ambulances, or hospitals.

8. If an attorney is elected to government office, it shall be a felony to hunt, "entrap", or possess it.

9. Stuffed or mounted attorneys must have a state health department inspection for rabies, and vermin.

10. It shall be illegal for a hunter to disguise himself as a reporter, drugdealer, pimp, female legal clerk, sheep, accident victim, bookie, or taxaccountant for the purpose of hunting attorneys.

(Maximum number of catches allowed per hunting season)

1. Yellow Bellied Sidewinder...........(2)
2. Two-faced Tort Feasor...............(1)
3. Back-stabbing Divorce Litigator.....(4)
4. Small-breasted Ball Buster..........(3)
(Female only)
5. Big-mouthed Pub Gut.................(2)
6. Honest Attorney.....................(0)
(On the Endangered Species List) (Illegal to hunt)
7. Cut-throat..........................(2)
8. Back-stabbing Whiner................(2)
9. Brown-nosed Judge Kisser............(2)
10. Silver-tongued Drug Defender.......($100 BOUNTY)
Link Posted: 11/15/2003 8:04:15 AM EDT
OK - A plane full of lawyers crashes into a mountain and there are no survivors.
Link Posted: 11/17/2003 4:29:11 AM EDT
Now that's funny!
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