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Posted: 8/24/2006 9:15:07 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/24/2006 9:19:09 AM EDT by scottryan]
I don't mean to be joking with the thread, I'm trying be serious.

I cannot stand public restroom toliet paper. That rough worthless stuff that doesn't clean anything, like the stuff you had at school or in a hotel. We have it at work and I can't stand it. My company is so cheap they don't even get TP that has a cardboard tube in it. It is just a solid roll that has two indentations that fit into little fingers in the holder. It doesn't even unroll nicely.

I have to bring a pack of Wet Ones whenever I go somewhere. After using the wipes, its like the clouds parted, the sun shined, and the angles started singing. It is a night and day, black and white difference between them. I have a pack of these everywhere, in my truck, at my desk at work, and at home.

If I don't bring a pack of Wet Ones, I have to sit with a case of leaky, greasy swamp ass all day.

Is is just me or is anyone else annoyed with this stuff?
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:22:37 AM EDT
You sir, are a regular modern day poet. Really paint a picture there.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:23:42 AM EDT
I avoid public restrooms at all costs. Id rather go in the woods and use my socks if i had to.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:25:28 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/24/2006 9:25:45 AM EDT by scottryan]
I really don't want this to turn into a public restroom thread, but I feel for you.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:25:56 AM EDT
ARFCom Toilet Paper: Ruff 'n' tuff and doesn't take shit off anybody.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:26:05 AM EDT
The military calls that kind of toilet paper "John Wayne Paper". Because it's rough, tough, and takes no shit.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:27:04 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Seth_Livzz:
The military calls that kind of toilet paper "John Wayne Paper". Because it's rough, tough, and takes no shit.


I've heard that before.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:27:11 AM EDT
When you got roids, everything is rough.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:27:59 AM EDT
I prefer rough toilet paper... it tends to be stronger.

Nothing is worse than poking a hole in the TP and hitting another hole.

That lady-scented, puffy foo-foo bullshit TP is useless.


- BG
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:28:02 AM EDT
I agree that cheap TP is often inferior, but if you are having problems wiping your ass I seriously doubt it's the TP fault.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:29:00 AM EDT

Originally Posted By BUCC_Guy:
I prefer rough toilet paper... it tends to be stronger.

Nothing is worse than poking a hole in the TP and hitting another hole.

That lady-scented, puffy foo-foo bullshit TP is useless.


- BG


I agree about the extra soft stuff, that is worthless too especially the aloe stuff that is greasy.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:31:26 AM EDT
I just want regular, white, unscented name brand TP
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:32:44 AM EDT
Get some of this stuff:

Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:35:01 AM EDT
Why does the baby have an afro?


Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:35:49 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/24/2006 9:37:46 AM EDT by Alien]

Originally Posted By Torqued:
Get some of this stuff:

i20.photobucket.com/albums/b241/HuDanny/asswipes.jpg


The Afrosquad had some funny videos that they made back in the day.


Originally Posted By MrMojoRising:
Why does the baby have an afro?




It was part of a skit made by a couple of what appeared to be white college guys that put on afros and made some amateur comedy videos/skits. They called themselves Afrosquad.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:38:33 AM EDT
At least they don't leave a 6"x6" square of 50-grit sandpaper in there for you instead.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:47:07 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/24/2006 9:50:04 AM EDT by markm]

Originally Posted By MrMojoRising:
You sir, are a regular modern day poet. Really paint a picture there.


YEAH! +1 on the PICS of the SWAMP ASS!!!!

Bad TP = frequent "fresh checks" A fresh check is a follow up wipe a while after you've layed cable. I'm about to go do a fresh check right now!
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:47:44 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Torqued:
ARFCom Toilet Paper: Ruff 'n' tuff and doesn't take shit off anybody.
exactly
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 9:57:28 AM EDT

Originally Posted By roboman:
At least they don't leave a 6"x6" square of 50-grit sandpaper in there for you instead.


That would be about just as good. The damn stuff feels like sandpaper.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:00:42 AM EDT
You are all soft.

In the 1930s Toilet paper from Northern Paper was advertised as "splinter free".

The good old days INDEED.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:04:39 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:04:49 AM EDT

Originally Posted By markm:


Bad TP = frequent "fresh checks" A fresh check is a follow up wipe a while after you've layed cable. I'm about to go do a fresh check right now!



I truly LOL'ed.


And I'm glad I'm not the only one that does that.


Pull my finger! Uh.......dammit. Shart? I'll be right back.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:11:04 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/24/2006 10:12:07 AM EDT by markm]

Originally Posted By MrMojoRising:

I truly LOL'ed.


And I'm glad I'm not the only one that does that.


I just got it done! I hate having to do so around my woman. I always have to come up with an excuse for why I'm going back into the bathroom before we leave somewhere. I hate getting out in the car right after a dump, without my fresh check. Skidding underwear is not an option for me.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:16:58 AM EDT
In the mid 70's I was at a hotel in Scotland a few days. Their tp was like wax paper. You had to ball it up a few times to get it to work sort of right.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:17:35 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:26:49 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/24/2006 10:27:32 AM EDT by FordGuy]

Originally Posted By scottryan:
I don't mean to be joking with the thread, I'm trying be serious.

I cannot stand public restroom toliet paper. That rough worthless stuff that doesn't clean anything, like the stuff you had at school or in a hotel. We have it at work and I can't stand it. My company is so cheap they don't even get TP that has a cardboard tube in it. It is just a solid roll that has two indentations that fit into little fingers in the holder. It doesn't even unroll nicely.

I have to bring a pack of Wet Ones whenever I go somewhere. After using the wipes, its like the clouds parted, the sun shined, and the angles started singing. It is a night and day, black and white difference between them. I have a pack of these everywhere, in my truck, at my desk at work, and at home.

If I don't bring a pack of Wet Ones, I have to sit with a case of leaky, greasy swamp ass all day.

Is is just me or is anyone else annoyed with this stuff?


so let me get this straight....

you bring, most likely in your little man purse, tiny packs of hygenic feminine wipes so that you can moisturize and cleanse your anal sphincter, and surrounding taint area, because your ass is simply too tender to undergo the same treatment the rest of us merrily bear...
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:31:28 AM EDT

Originally Posted By markm:

Originally Posted By MrMojoRising:

I truly LOL'ed.


And I'm glad I'm not the only one that does that.


I just got it done! I hate having to do so around my woman. I always have to come up with an excuse for why I'm going back into the bathroom before we leave somewhere. I hate getting out in the car right after a dump, without my fresh check. Skidding underwear is not an option for me.


I really don't understand this either - are you saying you randomly shit yourself and just need to periodically clean it off your ass and underwear? are you like 90 or something? I'd get that checked out, it ain't normal.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:34:38 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/24/2006 10:35:40 AM EDT by markm]

Originally Posted By FordGuy:
I really don't understand this either - are you saying you randomly shit yourself and just need to periodically clean it off your ass and underwear? are you like 90 or something? I'd get that checked out, it ain't normal.


No, Retard. I take preventative steps to see that I never end up with Dookie skids on my clothing. It's a good preventative measure, especially in hotter climates.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:36:09 AM EDT

Originally Posted By markm:

Originally Posted By FordGuy:
I really don't understand this either - are you saying you randomly shit yourself and just need to periodically clean it off your ass and underwear? are you like 90 or something? I'd get that checked out, it ain't normal.


No, Retard. I take preventative steps to see that I never end up with Dookie skids on my clothing.


I tnink he was wondering why you don't finish wiping while still in the stall instead of going back for a second wipe.
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:38:14 AM EDT
in soviet russia tp wipes you
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:41:06 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/24/2006 10:42:17 AM EDT by markm]

Originally Posted By LongWalkHome:
I tnink he was wondering why you don't finish wiping while still in the stall instead of going back for a second wipe.


Look at it like this....

smear some crap on the back of your hand. Take toilet paper and wipe it off. IS THAT CLEAN ENOUGH FOR YOU? If it is, you're a sick bastard. Only a shower or a moist cleaning will truly get you fresh. TP is just a temporary solution until you can clean yourself correctly. (shower or moist wipe)
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:42:16 AM EDT
Jeez, MarkM. You mean wiping 87 times won't work?
Link Posted: 8/24/2006 10:42:27 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/24/2006 10:43:01 AM EDT by NorCal_LEO]
Give me a break.
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