What the hell...let the hijack continue...
You might be a prison bitch if:
You love meat in the can, but have never heard of Spam.
You had your salad tossed every night this week, but you haven’t been in a restaurant in 3 years.
You have knealt in front of a man outside of the chapel.
You have ever dyed your underwear with Kool-Aid.
Before you go to bed, you find nuts on your pillow instead of a mint.
The C.O.s call you Ma’am
You have a street value in cigarettes or snack foods.
You have been written up for spooning.
Your cellie refers to you as his better half.
When you cry, shoe polish runs down your cheek.
Someone has shanked someone else to defend your virtue.
Someone grabs your Head & Shoulders in the shower… and you don’t even own shampoo.
You have ever asked another con if your “issues” make your ass look big.
A routine X-ray has ever revealed a mop handle.
You have relatives smuggle in tictacs and nail polish instead of dope.