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10/20/2017 1:01:18 AM
9/22/2017 12:11:25 AM
Posted: 8/5/2005 11:38:23 PM EDT


Link

SCOTTISH courts are dealing with an ever growing collection of fetishists.

In September 2003, pervert Ian Curtis was caught having sex with a frozen chicken.

When he was discovered by his wife Jean, the former military policeman, 42, of Glasgow, was dressed in a skirt, silk blouse and rubber stockings.

Jean, who later divorced him, shouted at her hubby: 'You dirty b ****** , that's my Sunday lunch.'

In the same year, farmer Darran Emms, 35, was caught having sex with the family's Rhodesian Ridgeback dog by his pregnant wife Suzanne.

In 1999, a pervert nicknamed Dr Strangeglove was jailed for a year.

David Clark, 23, of Hurlford, Ayrshire, tried to force women to wear leather and rubber gloves. In 2002, Ross Watt appeared in court charged with having sex with a traffic cone and a shoe.

The 33-year-old, of Edinburgh, who was being watched by a crowd, was remanded in custody pending a psychiatric report.

In February 2003, officers arrested oddball Michael Bramham, who duped an Edinburgh woman into letting him cover her feet with baked beans.

The 25-year-old conman claimed he was trying to raise cash for Comic Relief.

In 1997, David Blackwood, of Ayrshire, was arrested for his hairdresser fetish.

The 33-year-old admitted flashing at stylists and then doing a runner from their shops.

In 1993, Karl Watkins was jailed for 18 months for trying to have sex with pavements.

The electrician was just 21 when he indulged in his bizarre sexual fantasy
Link Posted: 8/5/2005 11:42:39 PM EDT
What about that one guy who sat on a frozen trout?
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 12:02:24 AM EDT
Wasn't he just fishing and slipped on a rock or somethinghinking.gif
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 12:34:15 AM EDT
I guess there's not much to do in Scotland.
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 12:41:22 AM EDT
Well,

I guess this proves you can have sex with anything....
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 12:43:43 AM EDT
a traffic cone and a shoe

I just don't understand.

Now, the baked beans I could get into.

Link Posted: 8/6/2005 12:45:06 AM EDT
At least they aren't building private amusement parks and having sex with little boys
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 12:46:12 AM EDT
Actually, that's not a very impressive list. A couple of perverts from 2003 and a few more from the 1990s. Those Scots better get hopping if they want to live up to the hype of rising fetish crimes.
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 12:53:41 AM EDT

In 1993, Karl Watkins was jailed for 18 months for trying to have sex with pavements.




Gives new meaning to the slogan "Where the rubber meets the road."
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 12:56:44 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 1Andy2:

In 1993, Karl Watkins was jailed for 18 months for trying to have sex with pavements.




Gives new meaning to the slogan "Where the rubber meets the road."




Road Rash: the new Scottish STD
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 1:05:49 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 1Andy2:

In 1993, Karl Watkins was jailed for 18 months for trying to have sex with pavements.




Gives new meaning to the slogan "Where the rubber meets the road."


How is that even possible? I mean wtf... I mean hell.
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 1:47:55 AM EDT
he fucked a road?!!?, how the fuck do you shag a street?
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 2:05:04 AM EDT
mmmmmmkay
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 2:25:40 AM EDT

Originally Posted By MuRDoC:
he fucked a road?!!?, how the fuck do you shag a street?




Lots of potholes i guess. personall i prefer pieholes....but i guess if you like potholes........
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 2:31:02 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Oslow:
a traffic cone and a shoe

I just don't understand.

Now, the baked beans I could get into.




Link Posted: 8/6/2005 2:37:52 AM EDT
Hell I remember being 16 many years ago and I would have dry humped a knothole in a tree, but with an audience and the pavement, that's just not right.
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 2:45:26 AM EDT
well, everybodys gota have a hoby
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 3:25:05 AM EDT

Originally Posted By 1Andy2:

In 1993, Karl Watkins was jailed for 18 months for trying to have sex with pavements.




Gives new meaning to the slogan "Where the rubber meets the road."



And a new meaning for "road rash" too. This is too painful to even think about for normal folk.
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 4:37:59 AM EDT

In September 2003, pervert Ian Curtis was caught having sex with a frozen chicken.

When he was discovered by his wife Jean, the former military policeman, 42, of Glasgow, was dressed in a skirt, silk blouse and rubber stockings.

Jean, who later divorced him, shouted at her hubby: 'You dirty b ****** , that's my Sunday lunch.'



Now that's a woman with clearly defined priorities.
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 4:41:23 AM EDT
All this was predicted back in 1970


Link Posted: 8/6/2005 6:59:55 AM EDT

'You dirty b ****** , that's my Sunday lunch.'



Link Posted: 8/6/2005 7:16:00 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Airwolf:


Link

SCOTTISH courts are dealing with an ever growing collection of fetishists.

In September 2003, pervert Ian Curtis was caught having sex with a frozen chicken.

When he was discovered by his wife Jean, the former military policeman, 42, of Glasgow, was dressed in a skirt, silk blouse and rubber stockings.

Jean, who later divorced him, shouted at her hubby: 'You dirty b ****** , that's my Sunday lunch.'

In the same year, farmer Darran Emms, 35, was caught having sex with the family's Rhodesian Ridgeback dog by his pregnant wife Suzanne.

In 1999, a pervert nicknamed Dr Strangeglove was jailed for a year.

David Clark, 23, of Hurlford, Ayrshire, tried to force women to wear leather and rubber gloves. In 2002, Ross Watt appeared in court charged with having sex with a traffic cone and a shoe.

The 33-year-old, of Edinburgh, who was being watched by a crowd, was remanded in custody pending a psychiatric report.

In February 2003, officers arrested oddball Michael Bramham, who duped an Edinburgh woman into letting him cover her feet with baked beans.

The 25-year-old conman claimed he was trying to raise cash for Comic Relief.

In 1997, David Blackwood, of Ayrshire, was arrested for his hairdresser fetish.

The 33-year-old admitted flashing at stylists and then doing a runner from their shops.

In 1993, Karl Watkins was jailed for 18 months for trying to have sex with pavements.

The electrician was just 21 when he indulged in his bizarre sexual fantasy



I think Ian Kurtis was just expressing his dismay at his wife's lousy cooking.

David Blackwood was just pissed off and tired of paying $15 to have his haircut.

Karl Watkins was making his political statement that we need to do something to fix the potholes in the road.

Link Posted: 8/6/2005 7:19:49 AM EDT
ASSFISH!
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 7:23:43 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/6/2005 7:24:03 AM EDT by HK_Shooter_03]
And I thought the official ARFCOM anal sex(SIIHPAPP) fetish was strange...
Link Posted: 8/6/2005 10:49:29 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/6/2005 10:51:16 AM EDT by desertmoon]
Just goes to show you that when you deprive a people of guns, explosives, smokes, eight cylinder engines and other cool stuff they turn into retards.


Shoe fuckers, the lot of 'em! Poor dirty, bored off their asses bastards!!!!
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