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Posted: 5/11/2004 11:14:57 AM EST
I have been talking to a chick from school for the past couple of weeks, and she says that she does not like to have sex at all. She apparently likes it to be as short as possible. She has only been with her current boyfriend. Her boyfriend and her are currently on a "break".

She came over yesterday, and we went on a walk, and talked in my place for a while. She lives with her boyfriend, but in her parents house. They have separate rooms, and dont have sex very often. It would seem as though this chick is very interested in me, but the situation is sending up red flags with me. I would date her, but i am a very sex oriented person, and the whole sceen just seems weird to me.

What do you guys make of this situation. Is she just doing it wrong, or is she nuts?
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:18:35 AM EST
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:19:08 AM EST
[Last Edit: 5/11/2004 11:19:32 AM EST by einnor1040]
She is lacking in experience. You need to put it to her really good. She will change her opinion.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:19:59 AM EST
dude, get the fuck out of there. now .
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:22:04 AM EST
[Last Edit: 5/11/2004 11:22:24 AM EST by Red_Label]

Originally Posted By Aimless:
Victim of sexual abuse



EXACTLY! I know because my wifey is like that. And she was abused as a child. Do yourself a favor, if a healthy sex life is VERY important to you, do not proceed with that relationship any further. The odds of you being able to change her attitude toward sex is minimal. It can be done, but it takes MANY years of love and understanding. Most guys have trouble being understanding when their desires to procreate are screaming at them. It ain't an easy road to commit to a victim of sexual abuse...
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:22:08 AM EST

Originally Posted By Aimless:
Victim of sexual abuse



Agreed. Met several girls like this in college. They would bail from any relationship as soon as the man gave any suggestion he was interested in having sex. Either child sex abuse victims or more recent rape victims.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:22:21 AM EST

Originally Posted By Aimless:
Victim of sexual abuse



Yup either that or shes just really self concious and can't enjoy herself. It has to be some mental issue.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:24:41 AM EST

Anyone know a chick that does not like sex


Do you mean before, or after, marriage?
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:27:50 AM EST

Originally Posted By killingmachine123:
She lives with her boyfriend, but in her parents house. They have separate rooms, and dont have sex very often.

What do you guys make of this situation. Is she just doing it wrong, or is she nuts?



What do you think Einstein?
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:30:53 AM EST

Originally Posted By hardcase:

Anyone know a chick that does not like sex


Do you mean before, or after, marriage?



Aint that the dang truth!
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:33:56 AM EST

Originally Posted By Aimless:
Victim of sexual abuse



That was my first thought, and actually the first reply to this post. Perhaps keeping it friendly might be the way to go here.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:37:59 AM EST
Or, if her current boyfriend really is the only sexual partner she's had, he could be really bad

No kidding, some guys have no idea how to please a woman.

But it could be the abuse thing, too.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:42:38 AM EST

Originally Posted By jblachly:
Or, if her current boyfriend really is the only sexual partner she's had, he could be really bad

No kidding, some guys have no idea how to please a woman.

But it could be the abuse thing, too.



No doubt. Apparently, something like 70% of women have never orgasmed. My guess is that 70% of men are probably lousy in the sack. They get on and grunt a few times and it's over - some fun. I've talked to guys that say they don't like foreplay. WTF? Getting (her) there is the best part!
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:45:31 AM EST
1. Make a deal for this stuff. Chickie-Lube

2. Post pics.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:46:41 AM EST

Originally Posted By jblachly:
No kidding, some guys have no idea how to please a woman.



Silly me, since when was sex about pleasing a woman?
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:49:22 AM EST

Originally Posted By ChrisS:

Originally Posted By jblachly:
Or, if her current boyfriend really is the only sexual partner she's had, he could be really bad

No kidding, some guys have no idea how to please a woman.

But it could be the abuse thing, too.



No doubt. Apparently, something like 70% of women have never orgasmed. My guess is that 70% of men are probably lousy in the sack. They get on and grunt a few times and it's over - some fun. I've talked to guys that say they don't like foreplay. WTF? Getting (her) there is the best part!



70%, Poor ladies.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:50:23 AM EST

Originally Posted By SP10:

Originally Posted By jblachly:
No kidding, some guys have no idea how to please a woman.



Silly me, since when was sex about pleasing a woman?



word. nice shotty.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:51:28 AM EST
I saw a show on that, it is called sexual anorexia.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 11:53:42 AM EST

Originally Posted By ChrisS:

Originally Posted By jblachly:
Or, if her current boyfriend really is the only sexual partner she's had, he could be really bad

No kidding, some guys have no idea how to please a woman.

But it could be the abuse thing, too.



No doubt. Apparently, something like 70% of women have never orgasmed. My guess is that 70% of men are probably lousy in the sack. They get on and grunt a few times and it's over - some fun. I've talked to guys that say they don't like foreplay. WTF? Getting (her) there is the best part!



That's what I'm thinking. Gotta keep these things in mind too. Show her the way dude!
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:00:29 PM EST
How old is she? If she's young she's probably just immature and doesn't really feel comfortable because she doesn't know WTF she's doing.

Sounds like her BF might just be a lousy lay to me... maybe she has never actually orgasmed and therefore doesn't know what the real meaning/purpose of sex is.

On the other hand being a short lay would have perks for the guy... it would be nice and quick with no foreplay or cuddling... almost like beating off, but without the "I'm such a pathetic porn addicted perv" guilt.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:00:34 PM EST

Originally Posted By Rip_Roarin_Wacko:
1. Make a deal for this stuff. Chickie-Lube

2. Post pics.



I don't know it seems as though someone has already called dibs, and they aint kidding around.

On a more serious note, I suppose that the guy she is/was with does indeed suck. Although she has stated that she has very little sexual desire. She felt that it could be due to the pill, but I have put it to a couple of chicks who were on the pill, and I was definatly not hearing any of this from them. That was one of the resons to suspect the abuse thing, but I kind of doubt it.

Perhaps I should just go ahead and hit her with the white zebra stripe, post pics, and see what happens. Although I refuse to be associated with crazy chicks, so I am still leary.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:13:14 PM EST
I've dated some pretty frigid chicks, and I've dated molested chicks. Self esteem is a lot of it, and the molested chick wasn't the worst I've had in bed by a long shot. Dated a manic girl for a short while, SHE had some sexual issues....

The guy she is with is likely a turd, you might try to work your magic on her but if you don't have much luck you are best off to move on. Chicks only hold back for three reasons 1)they are trying to control you, 2) they have 'issues', and 3) they have lost respect for you.

Give it a shot, then 'git on down the road if you can't get her groove going. There's nothing worse than the guilty feeling of being in a relationship with a person you care about but aren't satisfied with in bed.

Dave
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:15:20 PM EST

Originally Posted By killingmachine123:
On a more serious note, I suppose that the guy she is/was with does indeed suck. Although she has stated that she has very little sexual desire. She felt that it could be due to the pill, but I have put it to a couple of chicks who were on the pill, and I was definatly not hearing any of this from them. That was one of the resons to suspect the abuse thing, but I kind of doubt it.



- The pill affects different girls in different ways. My wife has been on a couple different pills and some of them have in fact diminished her sex drive. I believ the OBGYN will back me up on this one.

- Is she smoking hot or is she so-so and her boyfriend just makes her feel even less attractive than she is? He could do this by not paying enoug attention, getting his nut off without any real attempt to pleasure her, treats like a piece of shit, etc. All of these could take their toll on the sex drive.

- I'd say find yourself another girl since she already ha some issues. Not point in trying to take the approach of trying to save her from herself or make her a new person. That shit is for John Hughes movies, not real life. In real life she's going to be a miserable bitch for who ever she is with. Sounds like she qualifies for antidepressants... and if she is already on them then that might be affecting her sex drive as well.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:17:14 PM EST
Run away and don't look back!
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:19:47 PM EST
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:27:28 PM EST
My X was like that she broke it off becouse in here words "we were getting to close"

Later on i found out her X took her virginity then broke off the relationship. ie "well i got what I wanted so fuck off bitch"
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:28:05 PM EST
I had a GF like that man.. Hot as hell, but a complete ice chest in the bed.. Like a Geo Metro with a Lambroghini body kit glued on. She denied abuse, but she was such a head case I can't really say I'm convinced. My advice would be to run. After a few months of holding a mirror in front of her face, it can start to take quite a toll on a guy. There are apparently quite a few women around like that too. I mean sure.. She might just be misunderstood, improperly loved, and a complete jewel in the rough. I wouldn't lay money on it though.

Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:28:34 PM EST
"Educate" the poor girl as best as you can NOW!

It will only get worse "IF" you have a "relationship" with her.

She must be related to my Ex-wife.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:44:16 PM EST
Maybe abuse, maybe not. The only girl I dated that I knew for a fact had been abused was a sex crazy slut. She was a man hater though. Go figure.

Regardless, I run like hell from this situation.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:51:36 PM EST
So it seems like the general consensus would be to run like hell, or hit it as fast as possible. I dont think that my penis will allow me to go the first route, so we will see what comes of #2 I guess. Any other theories will be fully explored though. Oh, and pics will be posted if at all possible.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:57:48 PM EST
I've been single now for about 4 months after a long marriage.
I've started dating now and times and women have changed.
Women are more aggressive and know exactly what they want.
And they are a more lusty group then I remember before I got married.
I'm dating women in their 40's and 50's.
So if you are having problems with a much younger one, forget it.
There is a giant world of women out there.
Believe me, DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME ON A WOMAN THAT DOES NOT PLEASE YOU!
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 12:58:26 PM EST

Originally Posted By Sukebe:
Maybe abuse, maybe not. The only girl I dated that I knew for a fact had been abused was a sex crazy slut. She was a man hater though. Go figure.

Regardless, I run like hell from this situation.




They are sex-crazed until they marry. Then they turn it off. Because sex repulses them and makes them feel dirty. The only reason they were sex-crazed to start with is that they felt it was their only way to attract a man and perhaps, the only power they had. But trust me, when most sex-abuse victims get married, the sex problems begin and the husband is in for some serious years of "issues" to deal with.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 2:03:12 PM EST
Not mine, She was molested my her father. We've been together since 98, Married since 02. She's still in sexual hyperdrive.

If you wives are cooling off you are doing something wrong.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 2:16:46 PM EST
Scientists have discovered a food guaranteed to kill all sex drive in women.

It's called "wedding cake".
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 2:16:49 PM EST
Is she Catholic?

Those girls can be fixed.
Link Posted: 5/11/2004 4:22:55 PM EST
I dated a chick in PRK-pretty hot redhead-that wasn't interested in any more than about 5-7 minutes of sex.

Me, being a man that pays attention (somewhat) to the things women stereotype us about, made certain that I wasn't a "5 minute man".

Nope, it didn't work out.
Funny thing was, about 3 months after we broke up and I was gettin' into a babe of a blonde, she calls me and says, "I've had a chance to re-evaluate our relationship and I'd like to try again".

Yeah, right.
Link Posted: 5/12/2004 3:15:07 AM EST
[Last Edit: 5/12/2004 3:15:49 AM EST by cajunboy]

Originally Posted By P806:

Originally Posted By hardcase:

Anyone know a chick that does not like sex


Do you mean before, or after, marriage?



Aint that the dang truth!





Link Posted: 5/12/2004 5:28:52 AM EST

Originally Posted By killingmachine123:
I have been talking to a chick from school for the past couple of weeks, and she says that she does not like to have sex at all. She apparently likes it to be as short as possible. She has only been with her current boyfriend. Her boyfriend and her are currently on a "break".

She came over yesterday, and we went on a walk, and talked in my place for a while. She lives with her boyfriend, but in her parents house. They have separate rooms, and dont have sex very often. It would seem as though this chick is very interested in me, but the situation is sending up red flags with me. I would date her, but i am a very sex oriented person, and the whole sceen just seems weird to me.

What do you guys make of this situation. Is she just doing it wrong, or is she nuts?



Speaking from experience, find another before the lack of makes you resent her for it.

Matching sexual needs is a big help in a relationship, but not the main thing, still vey high.

TXL
Link Posted: 5/12/2004 6:01:54 AM EST
Maybe "she" has something that doesn't belong down there? I sure wouldn't want to be the one to find out the answer either.
Link Posted: 5/12/2004 2:49:03 PM EST
Any wife with her husband after 10 years or so.

Just kidding but couldn't resist.

Tj
Link Posted: 5/12/2004 3:37:18 PM EST
'Fraid the wedding cake thing is all too true. For those that blame the guy and say if only he'd do the foreplay, it's kinda hard when she won't even let you do THAT.

Nick
Link Posted: 5/12/2004 3:49:11 PM EST
[Last Edit: 5/12/2004 3:50:34 PM EST by Va_Dinger]
My second wife seemed to dislike sex, at least with me. Its just one of the twenty reasons why I dumped her ass.
Link Posted: 5/12/2004 4:11:57 PM EST
Funny you should ask... All the girls tell me that after we are done.
Link Posted: 5/12/2004 4:19:18 PM EST

Originally Posted By JThompson:
Funny you should ask... All the girls tell me that after we are done.



Link Posted: 5/12/2004 4:35:23 PM EST

Originally Posted By killingmachine123:
So it seems like the general consensus would be to run like hell, or hit it as fast as possible. I dont think that my penis will allow me to go the first route, so we will see what comes of #2 I guess. Any other theories will be fully explored though. Oh, and pics will be posted if at all possible.



You need to stop worrying about it and just let things happen. You said she seems into to you, so go out have a couple drinks and do something fun. When you get back to your place just let things happen. Don't worry about if she likes sex, wants sex, or has any interest in sex. If you set it up right it will just happen.
Link Posted: 5/12/2004 4:44:26 PM EST

Originally Posted By TUMOR:
She must be related to my Ex-wife.



Opposite of my ex. She would do it several times a day, and then still give me some too.
Link Posted: 5/12/2004 5:09:24 PM EST

Anyone know a chick that does not like sex




Ah, Any one I happen to like?



Vulcan94
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