[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Anti-Hippy Chili (Page 1 of 3)
Posted: 4/30/2007 11:59:32 AM EDT
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So i'm going to a bellydance, drumming, and fire spinning event on the 12th, and am trying to prepare for the inevitable food situation. The unfortunate con of such an event is that, while it draws plenty of scantily clad women, a good half of those women are hippy vegetarians and whatnot. This usually means, since the hippies like to control the food situation, that the rest of us are stuck eating flavorless hummus, stuffed leaves, and other assorted hippy bs. but not this year. This year I'm striking back with the least hippy-friendly dish i can come up with for the rest of us to devour while they cry into their patchoulli. Unfortunately, my kitchen skills are only average and not up to this task, so i call upon the collective ironchef hivemind that is arfcom... help me craft a chili that will strike fear into the hearts of hippies everywhere. A blend of animal fleshes and spices that will bring them to their knees! |
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Chili - With, or without beans? I use this as a base and tinker from there... 
It makes a great spagetti sauce (VERY meaty) and with some additions and subtractions would make a mean bean-free chili-type food.. Note to anyone who makes it for a spagetti sauce - be forwarned...it's really good, very filling, it'll sit in your stomach like a rock, and it'll feed like, 10. Set course for leftovers...and yes, it's even better the day after... |
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I like to use Carrol Shelby's Chili mix as a base and add tons of pickled jalapenos, some crushed red pepper, hamburger and tons of beans. Kidney beans work the best because pinto benas may get crushed when you stir the pot. I also like to throw in a can of Rotel. |
Whstever base you use, throw in some rattlesnake or other exotic meats that would piss them off. I have lots of beaver and muskrat and bobcat meat from trapping that i like to cook up for the nature lovers. And if your hardcore like some of the cowboys i know you could throw in two cans of Copenhagen LongCut.
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Hippies like veggies... but Texans love beans in their chili. Crawfish meat is a good one to add too, to celebrate crawfish season. I threw some in my chili recently because I had a bunch of crawfish meat left over. Not bad. |
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Heres my simple football game day chili recipe. (with beans) 1 big crock pot 1 (for 2lb HB mix) of Williams chili seasoning 2 cans each, Juice included Kidney beans Chili beans Pinto beans Stewed tomatoes BROWN 2lbs hangaburr 2lbs ground sausage (for thicker chili, drain beans before adding to crock pot) Add it all to crock pot Stew on low for 8-10 hrs. You said you werent great in the kitchen, This is as simple as it gets and everyone wants the recipe every time I make it.. 
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I think there were some good recipes over on seatstaysup.com a while back. |
Speak for yourself, weirdo. 
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meat is a good one to add too, to celebrate crawfish season.
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my real concern is my desire to use a lot of different meats in it. I want to know if anyone out there has some warnings on what doesnt work well together so i steer clear. I want it to scare hippies, but i want it to be tasty too. Fiend (who is only helping because he loves chili almost as much as he hates hippies) and I were tumbling the idea of using: Beef Chicken Turkey venison Lamb and Pork but i dont want to mix two that wont work well together. I cant imagine there would be a problem, but that's why im asking here. (i could have put money on the bean argument showing up here )
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I don't have any specific chili recipes (I'm just not a chili cook) but, here's some things that "may" help you in you goal. OK, first off, you have to buy EVERYTHING IN the chili from a Super-Walmart (That gets you points deducted with them right off the bat and you don't have to advertize the fact until AFTER it's been eaten  )Also, try and get Name-Brand (CORPORATE) ingredients. Try and include as much PORK and BEEF (You can advertize both as being [Factory] FARM RAISED) as you possible can. Wally-world sells Buffalo now so, if you can swing a little of THAT, even better! Good luck and have fun |
Chili without beans = Sauce Tyler's Texas Chili Recipe courtesy Tyler Florence 3 dried ancho peppers, stemmed and seeded 2 tablespoons dried oregano 2 tablespoons sweet paprika 2 tablespoons whole coriander 1 tablespoon cumin seed 1 tablespoon chili powder 3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil 2 onions, chopped 3 pounds beef chuck, cut into 1-inch cubes Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper 6 cloves garlic, chopped 1 canned chipotle chile, chopped 1/2 jalapeno pepper, chopped 2 (28-ounce) cans whole tomatoes, hand crushed 1 cinnamon stick 1 teaspoon sugar 2 tablespoons masa harina 1/2 tablet Mexican chocolate (about 1 1/2 ounces) Grated queso fresco, for garnish Cilantro leaves, for garnish Lime wedges, for garnish In a small dry skillet over low heat add the ancho peppers, oregano, paprika, coriander, cumin, and chili powder. Cook until they begin to smell, about 2 minutes. Put the spices into a spice mill or food processor and grind until they are powdered. Set aside. Heat a large heavy bottomed casserole over medium heat; add 3 tablespoons olive oil and the onions. Cook until the onions are soft and beginning to caramelize, about 10 minutes. Pat the beef dry and season it with salt and pepper. Add it to the pot and cook, stirring frequently, until it has browned on all sides, about 10 minutes. Add 2 tablespoons of the toasted spice mix, the garlic, chipotle, jalapeno, tomatoes, cinnamon stick, and sugar. Season with salt and stir well. Add some hot water until the meat is just covered with liquid. Return to the boil, reduce to a simmer, cover, and cook for 1 1/2 hours. Remove the meat and shred it with a fork. Return it to the pot, stir in the masa harina and chocolate, and cook for another 10 minutes, uncovered, to thicken. Taste and adjust seasoning. Serve with the queso fresco, cilantro, and lime for garnish. Add a can o bean in there somewhere. |
You don't want chili then, you want some good old western KY burgoo. |
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1 large onion 1 1/2 lb. Ground Meat (I use bison burger or venison when I can) 1 can dark red kidney beans 1 can light red kidney beans 1 6 oz. can tomato paste (Optional) 1 can diced tomatoes 1 can French Onion Soup 3 tablespoons chili powder (I use one regular, one hot, and if I feel like a lot of heat, then I substitute cayenne pepper for the third one.) 1 teaspoon garlic powder (or use fresh garlic, crushed / pressed) 3/4 teaspoon tabasco pepper sauce 1 1/2 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon sugar Oregano to taste A dash or two of cumin 4 cups water Dice and brown onion in heavy skillet. Add and brown ground meat. Drain kidney beans. Add all ingredients to dutch oven, bring to boil, reduce heat and simmer on low for 3 1/2 to 4 hours OR add all ingredients to crock pot and cook on low for 12 hourse. Of course if your Texan, then eliminate the beans (I guess), but to me it just ain't the same. |
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and heres my chili recipe, enjoy: Ingredients: stage a: 4lbs top sirlon, cut into 3/8" squares 1lbs regular breakfast sausage 2lbs hamburger meat enough Wesson Oil to brown it all in 2 tbsp seasoning salt 2 tbsp pepper 2 tbsp garlic powder 2 tbsp tony chachere's 6 oz bud light (drink rest) 1 large onion 4 serranos stick together. brown. (all measurements are really bullshit because i never measure but close enough to call.) drain. stick back in pot. part deux 1 can chicken broth 6 oz bud light (drink rest) 2 cans Hunts Tomato Sauce 1 large onion 1 bell pepper small handful of cilantro 3 cloves of garlic 5 tbsp Gebhardt Chili Powder 3 tbsp cumin 1 tsp cayenne pepper 2 cans rotel 1 can green chiles 1/2 tsp oregano and more of all the seasonings i used in stage a mix together with meat. simmer. 3rd half: 5 tbsp chili powder shot or 5 of tabasco sauce more of any seasonings it's missing really i just open a new bottle of gebharts chili powder and stop with just a little left in the bottom of the bottle.........as close to measuring as i get simmer. turn into judges. hope for trophy. if at all possible substitute venison for the sirloin and nix the breakfast sausage. the cuter and cuddlier the animal that died for the chili the less they will appreciate you cooking it.............. |
+1 on the Shelby's. |
sirloin if you're gonna go the steak route......... but oak, kirk??? |
I really l;ike Shelby's..it's tasty and easy to do. If you don't have the time to do it from scratch it's really good stuff, but as said earlier lay back on the salt until it's done. I just add stuff to mine like Rotel, jalapenos and sometimes hot taco sauce too. |
Hey man, where you been hiding? I use oak for most of my smoking. Mild smoke, burns well, leaves nice coals. I'll throw in some mesquite for extra smoke flavor sometimes. I switch to apple or cherry (when I can find it) for chicken. +1 on the sirloin. |
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2 pounds Sirloin 2 pounds Chuck 2 large onions 1 Green Pepper 3 cloves garlic Chili Kit - 3 Alarm or Shelby 2 fresh jalapeno peppers 2 habanero pepper 1 can rotel 2 Large tomato sauce 1 can Stewed Tomato 1 can Kideny bean 1 can chili beans (or chili magic beans for more flavor) Dice the onion and reserve 1/2 of one for garnish dice/chop the peppers finely chop the garlic brown the meat with 1/2 the onion and 1 garlic (chopped) clove - and a few tablespoons of chili powder - drain about 1/2 of the fat away (I do - but you can mix it all in I suppose) Put into a large pot (do not know technical name) and then mix the cans of tomato and beans, then the peppers, and finally use the Cumin, paprika, garlic and onion powders and of course the Chili powder from the kits. I do not use the salt or the masa - but that is my taste. serve with cheddar and diced onion. I call it AJ's ass burning chili and it is always a hit, I get requests especially during football season - such that I am chili'd out by mid winter. |
I've tried explaining that. I can tolerate it, but I much prefer chili w/o beans. |
been reading up on S vs. C cam, drag bags vs. new springs, 1 3/4 primaries vs. 1 7/8 primaries here recently instead of north vs. south, AR vs. AK, chili w/beans vs. chili wo/ beans. you'll be seeing more of me again when i reach ~ 450rwhp  in fact i'm 99% sure i'm gonna have to spend a weekend in houston to get my new cam installed, may have to stop by and visit a few of you assholes |
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Chilie has meat, peppers, more peppers, salt, more pepper (black), garlic, and cumin. Anything else is filler. I use the big black dried peppers (about 5-10 dried ancho chillies per lb of meat), seed them because I am a wimp, boil them up in a little water and hit them in a blender. Brown the meat, poor on the pepper sauce, and season with red pepper, black pepper, salt, garlic and cumin. I also add hatch peppers and jalapeños peppers when I have them around. As for meats, I like to throw in leftover bbq'd sausage if it is stilling arround as well, the smoked meat goes well with the smoky flavor of the ancho's. |
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You could make it with some bear meat, or rabbit, or llama... exoticmeats.com/store/index.php These people have some interesting selections. |
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If your hummus and stuffed leaves are bland then you are not making them right, mine are delicous!!! That being said, I would just make some venison chili and leave it go at that. With beans. Call it bambi chili or something, bambi and beans. Be careful of the fire. |
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Camp Red Chili (modified from a recipe by BCR) 2 ½-3 pounds of lean red meat, cubed (1/2-3/4 inch) 1 8 oz can tomato sauce 24 oz water 2 beef flavored bouillon cubes (optional but recommended) 1 tablespoon dry minced garlic 3 tablespoons dry minced onions 1 teaspoon oregano (Mexican preferred) 3 teaspoons cumin 1 teaspoon paprika ½ teaspoon cayenne pepper powder 7 tablespoons chili powder (heat varies with brand, find a level you like) 1 27 oz can Kidney beans, rinsed and drained (optional) 3 tablespoons masa (corn flour) 5+ tablespoons water In a heavy pot with a lid put 2 tablespoons of oil (prefer bacon grease but veggie oil will do). On high heat, sear the meat. Turn heat to medium, add tomato sauce, 24 oz water and bouillon cubes. Bring to a boil. Stir and scrape to deglaze the pot. In a bowl, mix garlic, onions, oregano, cumin, paprika, cayenne and chili powder. Dump mixture into the meat pot, stir. Cover and let simmer, stirring occasionally, until the meat is tender, 2 1/2-4 hours. Add beans, if you have to, after the second hour. In a bowl, make a thin paste with the masa and 5 tablespoons of water, add to the chili. Let simmer for an additional 20 minutes. Adjust seasonings, stir. Serves 4. |
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STOP IT! If you don't have TX in your profile stop posting chili recipes! All evidence necessary is in this thread. To the OP...TxRednec's recipe looks killer. Or just use the Carroll Shelby pack and follow the directions on the package. Whatever recipe, I'd go 1/2 hamburger and 1/2 spicy sausage.
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Chili makes real good spaghetti sauce. Throw some shredded cheese on it and a bunch of tobacco sauce and its real yummy. |
i dont make hummus or stuffed leaves. The hippies do. They all suck at cooking, but they are all angry and feministy, so god help you if you argue. I try to stick with the cool and not annoying members of the group, but most of us dont cook, so we are at the hippies' mercy, which sucks. Hence the chili. I think we will probably end up doing all venison or a three meat with steak pork and veal. I dont want all the different meat flavors to make it taste weird. Don't worry about the fire... that's the thing i learned to do when i could have been cooking. Fire Breathing Pr0n: 
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HA! Like "TX" was #11 down from Mt. Sinai. THEY COOK BEEF OUTSIDE AND CALL IT BAR-B-QUE! Ask 'em what "calf fries" are.  j/k actually, I thought calf fries were pretty good. ETA OP, get some t shirts made up with something like this..... 
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50:50 ground beef:ground pork tastes really good. It's what I usually use for lasagna or chili on the rare occasion I make either. 40:40:20 pork:beef:turkey would probably taste just fine. Chicken, I'm not sure I'd go there. It's just not a meat that lends itself so well to a chili. Lamb... I guess you could. It's a pretty distinctive flavor, though, and I'd guess it would either get lost in the mix, or make it taste not quite right. Buffalo would be fine, sub it in for some of the beef. As for any other meat and not having the flavors clash too much - really, you'll just have to experiment. I'll leave the spices and the bean flamewar to everyone else. |