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Posted: 8/18/2004 1:06:15 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/18/2004 1:07:16 AM EDT by twonami]

Family files suit against La Crosse & WI

KTTC-TVUSA - The family of a drowned University of Wisconsin-La Crosse student says both the school and the city are partly to blame.

Jared Dion's family has filed the first paperwork needed to sue the city of La Crosse and state of Wisconsin.

The 21-year-old disappeared in April after leaving a downtown bar.His body was found in the Mississippi River four days later.The claim says the university encourages binge drinking by running drink specials ads in the student newspaper.

It also says the "safe ride" bus encourages students to drink downtown, which is close to the river.The family is seeking half a million dollars.

Your kid is a friggen drunk, don't you get it?
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 1:14:08 AM EDT
Uh.  Sorry about the loss, but do not pass GO, do not collect half a million dollars.

I'm getting tired of this shit.
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 1:41:00 AM EDT
Wisconsin of all places. Geez. I used to live there.
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 1:59:02 AM EDT
Don't be so harsh.  If you lose a kid to stupidity or suicide, part of the coping mechanism is trying to find someone else to blame.  It is immeasurably difficult to lose a kid who is just getting started out in life.  You naturally don't want to blame the person you lost because the hurt is so great and you still love them.  Even when it is entirely their fault, you try to find reasons to find them blame free.

I know about this.  I have been there.  It has been 87 months since I lost my son.
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 2:24:18 AM EDT
Wise words, I am very sorry for you loss, it is so hard to lose a child for any reason.
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 2:35:02 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Mahatma8Rice:
Don't be so harsh.  If you lose a kid to stupidity or suicide, part of the coping mechanism is trying to make yourself and a trial lawyer rich.

Fixed it for ya.

Blaming, IMHO, is entirely different than hurling lawsuits. Grief is not an excuse for greed, as I've suffered one and never sought riches for it. I'll bet you didn't either.

That's the difference between good people and shitty ones.

BTW, not trying to make light of your loss, of which you have my condolences. Just using your post to illustrate a point.
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 2:58:30 AM EDT
The University probably doesn't have a lot of control over the student newspaper; sue the newspaper. The "safe ride" bus would seem to be an effort to find a solution to a problem that the city would just as soon didn't exist; the kid evidently didn't use the service.

There were a lot of times when I was in college that I could have fallen in the river if there had been one around. I don't remember anyone else dumping booze down my throat.
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 3:18:53 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/18/2004 3:19:40 AM EDT by Aimless]
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 3:25:17 AM EDT

Yes, money does enter into the equation.  A lawsuit or the threat of a lawsuit is often used as a means of making institutional changes.  Often, just being mad about something you see as a contributing factor will ultimately have no impact.  Please keep in mind this is from the perspective of people who have suffered a devastating loss.

The money from a law suit is seen as:

1.   Proof that they were wronged and that their child was someone not entirely responsible.   What more would anyone want to back up their contentions than a jury of 12 deciding that someone else was to  blame.  I am long past this mindset; for most people, it is a brief perception.  You learn to accept the reality and move on from there.

2.   A means of providing a less stressful lifestyle.  I went back to work two weeks after my son's death.  I was pretty much useles for a full year.  Fortunately, the family I work for had suffered from some tragic and untimely deaths and understand the impact that has on the survivors.  Anywhere else and I would have been terminated for lack of productivity.  I was very fortunate and to this day I am deeply appreciative of the patience of the Family.

3.   There are almost always desires to memorialize the deceased in the form of a foundation or scholarships.  In a way this is grief-driven, revisionist history.  Rather than having your kid remembered as the cause of their own death, they are remembered as the inspiration for good works.  Again, this is just a coping mechanism.

Very few of these lawsuits ever go anywhere.  Yes, I filed a lawsuit.  After about a year our lawyer decided that he wasn't going to go forward with it because the prospects of winning were slim.  The lawyers are in it for the money.  I no longer had the stomach for a court fight; the fact that my son was entirely responsible for his deadly decision was just too obvious to me.  I was willing to let it die there.  It was not a unanimous decision.  For an alternative opinion you would need to speak to my future ex-wife, if you can locate her.

Wrongful death lawsuits are ugly and they often mask a great deal of pain, loss, and emotional confusion.   When someone loses a child, you really need to give them a pass on any actions that appear illogical, pointless or even greedy.  At least do so for a while.  Most folks jump off that train as time passes;  some hang on forever as it becomes their reason for living.

Pray that you never, ever have to bury one of your children.
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 3:25:30 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/18/2004 7:45:13 PM EDT

Originally Posted By DoubleFeed:
Course you don't remember.  You were drunk.

Hummm, yes, but I must have been having fun cause I kept doing it.
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