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Posted: 1/5/2012 10:22:39 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/6/2012 7:39:11 AM EDT by sslocal]
About 4 months ago my daughter, 21, got a job in the next town up the coast. It is about 8-10 miles there.
She has no drivers license so I has to take her and pick her up. (The wife is down due to knee replacement)
After about a week I got fed up. I no longer had time to ride my bike or fix dinner due to picking her up.
I told her that she had until Jan 1, 2012 to either find a new job or get her license or take public transportation.
Well the deadline came and nothing has been done. In fact very little effort was expended until last month when she started to understand that I was serious.

I stopped taking her to work Jan 1.
She is pissed and is trying to guilt me into starting up again.
I refused.

So, am I being mean or what?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:24:05 AM EDT
nope your not a bad person.

She needs to get her shit together.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:24:30 AM EDT
She's too good to take the bus and too lazy to get a DL?
21 years old...WTF?

You're not being mean at all. Kindly tell her to grow the fuck up and/or move out



Speed
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:24:34 AM EDT
No.
Tell her to buy a bicycle. 8-10 isn't that far.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:25:13 AM EDT
She needs to grow up and be responsible for her own transportation (assuming she doesn't have a disability).
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:25:44 AM EDT
No. Absolutely not.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:26:09 AM EDT
Yes you are, that's your child! You must be at her beckoning call, night and day, and week ends.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:26:49 AM EDT
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:26:58 AM EDT
Yes you clearly are a bad fucking person.

I do however agree with your approach regarding you daughters transportation issue. Good on you.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:26:59 AM EDT
Originally Posted By rfm05:
She needs to grow up and be responsible for her own transportation (assuming she doesn't have a disability).


Nope healthy as a horse.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:27:23 AM EDT
IMHO, the fact that she is trying to guilt you into chauffeuring her again shows that she needs to do some growing up.
You are a good father doing the right thing.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:27:28 AM EDT
I don't think so. Does she still live at home? If so I'd make her pay rent as well even if it's just a small amount. She has to learn personal responsibility sometime it may as well be now.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:27:34 AM EDT
I didn't read the OP or any of the comments, but yes, yes you are. You are a bad person OP, for whatever it is you're bad for.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:27:50 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Springer09:
nope your not a bad person.

She needs to get her shit together.


Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:28:19 AM EDT
If she is not in school she shouldnt even be living at home. Time for her to grow up.

You did good OP.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:28:19 AM EDT
hes an adult. time to act like one. would you expect someone to haul you to and from work?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:28:34 AM EDT
Why does she not have a license? I know CA has some funny laws concerning youngsters getting to drive, but damn. What is the deal here?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:28:45 AM EDT
Originally Posted By BrowardMason:
I didn't read the OP or any of the comments, but yes, yes you are. You are a bad person OP, for whatever it is you're bad for.


Thanks bud. Appreciate the support.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:29:04 AM EDT
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:29:33 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/5/2012 10:30:25 AM EDT by dcs12345]
Tell her to get a DL and a place in the next town up the coast.... She is 21, not 16.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:29:48 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Springer09:
nope your not a bad person.

She needs to get her shit together.


Truth
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:30:24 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Renegade13B:
Why does she not have a license? I know CA has some funny laws concerning youngsters getting to drive, but damn. What is the deal here?


She never needed one. I rarely leave the beach and I guess she doesn't either. She also told me she didn't want the responsibility.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:30:28 AM EDT

Originally Posted By hooligan223:
I don't think so. Does she still live at home? If so I'd make her pay rent as well even if it's just a small amount. She has to learn personal responsibility sometime it may as well be now.

I had to pay $125/month in rent when I was 16 til I moved out
This was in 1996 and $125 was a lot to a teenager.

In my parent's defense, they knew I was making some cash on the side besides my job, and I think they just wanted their cut



Speed
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:30:36 AM EDT
You gave her fair warning, you're GTG.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:31:21 AM EDT
Funny, the pics are loading for me.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:31:39 AM EDT
Originally Posted By speedracer422:
She's too good to take the bus and too lazy to get a DL?
21 years old...WTF?

You're not being mean at all. Kindly tell her to grow the fuck up and/or move out



Speed


Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:31:58 AM EDT
She's living at home, yes?

Why is she working?

You need to up her allowance so she doesn't have to work, ya big meanie.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:32:12 AM EDT
Call hondaciv. I hear he likes to help out ladies in distress...
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:32:25 AM EDT
Why doesn't your daughter have a drivers license? Has she ever had one? Does she know how to drive?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:33:11 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/5/2012 10:35:23 AM EDT by Renegade13B]
Originally Posted By sslocal:
Originally Posted By Renegade13B:
Why does she not have a license? I know CA has some funny laws concerning youngsters getting to drive, but damn. What is the deal here?


She never needed one. I rarely leave the beach and I guess she doesn't either. She also told me she didn't want the responsibility.



I didn't need one when I was a young'en either, but my parents still made me get one. They probably would have kicked me out by the time I was 21 too, but I made my way out long before then.

Sometimes the eagle has to push the eaglet out of the nest.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:34:13 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Bubbles:
Why doesn't your daughter have a drivers license? Has she ever had one? Does she know how to drive?


She has been learning but as I said, too little,too late.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:34:56 AM EDT
[Last Edit: 1/5/2012 10:35:22 AM EDT by wilNva]
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:44:59 AM EDT
21, no license?
why?

time to cut the umbilical cord. if she tries to guilt you, tell her keep pushing and she can look for a apartment too
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:48:03 AM EDT
AND, you have to absolutely stick to what you said. She is an adult.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 10:48:54 AM EDT
I have no idea whether you are a good person or not, but this is clearly Bush's fault

Once upon a time I put all my son's worldly shit in trash bags and piled it all down front of the property by the gate. I texted his hungover/whatever ass after cancelling his gas credit card on my account and told him he needed to come get his shit before somebody drove by and picked it all up. I told him I didn't ever want to see him or talk to him again, my obligations had been fulfilled. Have a nice life somewhere else. Time has passed and his shit is straight. We are OK now. I am glad. It was a tough thing to do, but it was the right thing at the time and it is entirely possible that had I not he would be in the gutter chewing on a dead rat.
Your situation doesn't sound that bad, but some people will never stop taking as long as you are willing to put up with it.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:04:10 AM EDT
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:06:28 AM EDT
Nope , 21 ....... you know the rules ..
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:06:30 AM EDT
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:07:48 AM EDT
You are not bad.

Your grammer is bad.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:08:22 AM EDT
She is 21 time to figure out about life and something called personal responsiblity.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:10:10 AM EDT
21? and no pics? You know the rules
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:11:03 AM EDT
Tell her that you'll drive her for $2.70 per trip/flag drop, plus another $0.30 per 1/4 mile, plus a $2 surcharge for rides after dusk.

I think she'll get the hint and figure out that it's cheaper to drive herself!
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:11:14 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Springer09:
nope your not a bad person.

She needs to get her shit together.

Yup.

You might be a bad parent, but you aren't a bad person.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:14:33 AM EDT
10 miles on a bike isn't even enough to get me warmed up. I'd just ride it, but I like to ride.
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:16:18 AM EDT


This FTW
Hell yes it's only 8-10 miles.

Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:16:58 AM EDT
21? I had my permit THE DAY I turned 15!

Incidently, I have a 19 year old cousin who STILL hasnt got her license and makes her parent drive her back and forth to college 4 hours away. WTF, is it not "cool" to drive anymore?
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:21:14 AM EDT
Originally Posted By stockshift:
Tell her that you'll drive her for $2.70 per trip/flag drop, plus another $0.30 per 1/4 mile, plus a $2 surcharge for rides after dusk.

I think she'll get the hint and figure out that it's cheaper to drive herself!


Profit potential!



Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:24:32 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Springer09:
nope your not a bad person.

She needs to get her shit together.


This x100!
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:24:47 AM EDT


My first thought also
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:25:48 AM EDT
Originally Posted By valheru21:
No.
Tell her to buy a bicycle walk. 8-10 isn't that far.


Fixt
Link Posted: 1/5/2012 11:26:02 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Springer09:
nope your not a bad person.

She needs to get her shit together.


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