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Posted: 10/28/2004 1:43:04 PM EDT

Once upon a time there was a little Hereford calf named Daryl.  He didn’t know he was a Hereford or that his name was Daryl.  He was born on a farm in Hickory county Missouri and was one of many like looking calves.  Unlike the range cattle that lived next door all pureblooded Herefords look exactly alike.  They all have white and reddish brown coats and white faces with curly hair on their noses and their eyes are sky blue.  You could say Daryl was a special calf.  All mother cows consider their calves to be special but purebreds are more special than range cattle and Herefords are the most special of all the purebreds.  There is Black Angus but well, let’s just say Herefords are just as special as Black Angus and leave it there.  

When the calves were old enough the farmer gathered them all together.  Everyone got special medicine to keep them from being sick.  The farmer separated the boy calves from the girl calves and the boy calf’s got an extra surprise!   Daryl was frightened at first but his mom told him not to worry.  Everything would be ok and all the other young bulls had it done so Daryl bravely stepped up to receive his surprise.  It hurt a lot!  Poor Daryl felt the farmer had played a horrible trick on him.  His mother consoled him and after a few days it was as if nothing had happened.  

One day in late spring a large green tractor and trailer came to Daryl’s farm on it were stacked many tan colored boxes and when Daryl asked his mother said they were hay bales.  All the cows ran over to the fence to watch the farmer and the man who rode the tractor unload the hay bales and stack them neatly in the barn.  The farmer and the man came over to the fence where the cattle had gathered and they talked about the hay and the cattle and made a decision.  The new man walked up to Daryl and put a rope around his neck and began leading him away from his mother.  Daryl got scared and began to bawl but his mother told him not to be afraid.  He should keep his chin up and always mind the man and do what he was told.  So Daryl was loaded onto the empty trailer and the man went back to the field and got another calf and also loaded it on the trailer.  The man and the farmer looked at the calves and at each other and the man slapped his thigh and laughed.  “HA!  They look just alike!  I will call one Daryl and I will call the other one Daryl”…  so they will be Daryl and his brother Daryl Like the TV commercial”.  The farmer shook his head in disgust of the poor joke as the man climbed on the tractor and drove Daryl and his bother Daryl to a farmhouse where an elderly couple lived.  The calves were unloaded into a large pasture that was filled with wild flowers and honeybees buzzed back and forth.  There was a water trough and a feed trough and a little shed to sleep in.  In the far corner of the pasture there was an old Jenny Mule that was standing all alone and she pretended to ignore them.  The man told the joke about Daryl’s name to the old couple and the old man laughed and slapped his leg.  The old woman shook her head in disgust and went into the house saying, “ I have chores to do”.  

Daryl missed his mom and was sad that first evening but he remembered what she had said.  How he should keep his chin up and mind the man and now he guessed now the old couple.   The calves didn’t know what to do so they stayed out by the fence all night and the mule went into the shed to sleep.  The next morning there was a clanking noise.  Daryl and his brother went over to the fence to see what was going on.  Just then the old man was filling a feeding trough with cracked corn!  Oh boy that was Daryl’s favorite thing to eat.  So he and the other calf ate it all up.  When he was done he felt stuffed and went into the shed to rest.  He spent the afternoon eating wild flowers and in the evening the clanging was heard again and once more he got to eat as much cracked corn as he could.  That evening the calves and the mule walked into a shed to sleep.  Daryl asked the mule why she didn’t eat the cracked corn.  The mule replied that the corn was special and it was just for special calves like Daryl and his brother.  Daryl said the old couple were nice and would not mind if the mule had a little corn but all the mule would say after that was “beware the hand of man”.  This concerned Daryl a little but he didn’t let it bother him.  The two calves didn’t have much in common with the old mule anyway so they played together and left the mule alone.  The spring and summer passed quickly for the calves and Daryl was getting bigger and bigger.  His coat was slick and shiny and the old man continued to feed him twice a day and sometimes spray him with medicine to keep flies away.  In the fall the leaves started turning gold and purple and the grass turned brown and tasted bitter.  But Daryl was not worried.  He still had all the corn he could eat.

One morning it was cold.  So cold Daryl woke up shivering and there was snow on the ground and ice in the water tank.  When the old man came out to look at the calves but he didn’t feed them.  That evening he came back out looked at them but didn’t feed them.  Daryl loved the cracked corn and was hungry!  He bawled a little and then felt ashamed of himself because of what his mother told him and the fact he was not a little calf anymore.  The following day the same thing happened.  No corn.  Was the old man angry?  Did Daryl do something wrong?  

On the third day a large truck pulled up to the fence and two men got out.  They were wearing white aprons and one man carried a pistol.  Daryl was worried but not afraid.  The old man came out of the house and talked to the men in the white aprons.  The old man told the joke about Daryl’s name and laughed.  The men looked on politely and commented on the Jenny mule that was hiding in the far corner of the pasture.  “Could she be rendered?”  The old man said no.  She was part of the family and had earned her keep but the calves had been raised special.  Daryl felt proud and knew the man was not angry with him.  Then the old man filled the trough with cracked corn!  “Yea!” Daryl though, the other calf beat Daryl to the trough and started eating all the corn.  Daryl rushed in and just then he heard a strange noise.  He looked over and the other calf was lying on the ground.  “Get up” cried Daryl.   We have corn to eat!  Daryl was concerned for the other calf because he knew it loved the corn just as much as he did but went back to eating and that was the last thing he ever did.  

The mule still lives in the pasture next to the old couple’s house.  The honeybees still buzz in the springtime and little Hereford calves are still raised by the farmer down the road.  The man and the old man still tell the Joke about Daryl’s name but don’t feel bad for Daryl.  He is still special.  In fact he’s tonight’s main course.  
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 1:47:55 PM EDT
I rate that story A-1!

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 1:49:28 PM EDT
Good story!!
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 1:51:16 PM EDT
Where's the sad part?

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 1:55:57 PM EDT
Who wrote that? PETA?
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 1:57:00 PM EDT
BBQ?  Sounds good.
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 1:58:39 PM EDT
i wrote it and it's a true story.
all except for part about the mule talking to the calves.  
i don't know if they had a conversation or not
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 1:59:01 PM EDT
Sounds like a yummy ending to me!

Think I'll have a little daryl tonight.

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 1:59:06 PM EDT
WTF over?
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 2:02:15 PM EDT
Daryl sleeps in my freezer now.
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 2:02:35 PM EDT

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 2:06:37 PM EDT

Where's the sad part?

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 2:09:02 PM EDT

Where's the sad part?

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 2:20:26 PM EDT
Poor Daryl
I want to cry....

After I finish  eating my steak

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 2:23:46 PM EDT
I found the sad part....

I'm eating chicken tonight.

Did anyone notice how the cow became dependent on something larger than itself that it didn't completely understand, trusted it too much because it was offering handouts, and then got burned because of it?

*big government*

With that, this sounds like on of Aesop's fables......

Good job, writer..
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 2:23:53 PM EDT
We did that every year when I was a kid. I even corked a calf one time because I was the only one he
wasn't afraid of. I heard one of the butchers remark to my Dad that I was cold-blooded. He just laughed
and said no, he just really likes steak!

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 3:04:21 PM EDT
Daryl is quite a treat................. In fact some of the Houston Crew was over at HK940's place for a BBQ, two bites into our burgers he asked how Daryl tasted, you could have heard a silenced .22 cycle.

Link Posted: 10/28/2004 8:07:38 PM EDT
Thats a funny funny story
Link Posted: 10/28/2004 8:10:13 PM EDT
Link Posted: 10/29/2004 7:29:21 AM EDT

I found the sad part....

I'm eating chicken tonight.

Did anyone notice how the cow became dependent on something larger than itself that it didn't completely understand, trusted it too much because it was offering handouts, and then got burned because of it?

*big government*

With that, this sounds like on of Aesop's fables......

Good job, writer..

You can read a lot into it like social security, impotence, old preying on the young, blindness of youth.  

But like Hemingway said.  “I just wanted to write a fishing story”.
Link Posted: 10/29/2004 7:34:01 AM EDT
Link Posted: 10/29/2004 7:45:51 AM EDT
Sounds like a Metaphor for our current Nanny State.
Link Posted: 10/29/2004 7:53:15 AM EDT

Looky all of the "other Daryl's" are talking about eating steak.  



"This is my rifle, there are many like it, but this one is mine"
Link Posted: 10/29/2004 8:03:05 AM EDT
Link Posted: 10/29/2004 8:05:18 AM EDT
That story just goes to show that there's room on this planet for all God's creatures...Right next to the mashed potatoes.

I'll have my Daryl Medium Rare, please.

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