I Am Done With Getting My Heart Broken – It’s Time For New Rules


I realize that it is almost impossible to protect my heart completely but I am going to do my best to lower those odds of it getting broken.

I am just exhausted from going through the same scenarios all over again.

I sometimes admire myself, and all the women who have been in my shoes. We’ve fallen so many times but we find a way to rise again. Stronger, bolder and more determined to push forward.

After being broken so badly, being strong is actually the only thing you have.

As you are building yourself up, you realize that you actually learned a lot from your experiences.

It’s just a matter of transferring your knowledge into actions.

And though it’s not as simple as it sounds, sometimes it’s inevitable. There comes a point in every woman’s life where she has to demand to be treated as she deserves.



That’s why I established some new rules that I am sharing with you just in case you were or are heartbroken, as I once was:

1) I won’t date a man I can’t trust
If you don’t have trust, you don’t have anything. That’s one of the most important things to keep in mind but I seemed to lose track of it way too often.

Trust has to be earned. I know that not every guy will be the cheating bastard or manipulative asshole that I am used to…

But they will have to lower their pace, take things slowly and give us a chance to get to know one another before we go from dating into a relationship.


2) I will be more selective about the type of men I date
I am done with toxic men. I can smell them a mile away now because they pretty much sum up my love life.

I am able to recognize all the red flags and all the warning signs.

I know I will get things wrong sometimes too. I know that there is a chance I will get hurt again but at least I will know what I should never put up with.


3) I will ignore the messages that come too late
I will resist the urge to answer a message that comes when it’s already too late. When my heart is broken and my dreams are shattered.

I will ignore messages that come late at night and that are clearly a booty call. I will never send a follow-up message after getting no reply.


4) I won’t be anybody’s toy
I am tired of playing games. I don’t want to be taken for granted or messed around with. The only way I will prevent that is if I don’t allow it.

I want someone who is consistent. Someone who texts, calls, shows up and makes time for me.

I don’t want empty promises or lame excuses. I want to know that somebody cares about me as much as I do for him.


5) I won’t chase after love
There’s no point in chasing after love. Love has to go both ways. All the affection, attention and investments have to be reciprocated.

I am done being the one who gives more and gets nothing in return. I am done being with somebody and feeling alone.

I want someone who makes the efforts. Someone who matches my investments. Someone who cares and isn’t afraid to show it.


6) I will be my own priority
It’s hard to admit but I used to lose sight of myself because of love. I was so focused on that other person.

I was focused on their needs and forgot all about my own. And I repeated that same mistake more than once.

It took me a long while to realize that I am needed too, that I matter too and that I am worthy of love. But first, I have to give that same love to myself.

I rebuilt my life. I have my interests, dreams, and goals. I have a life. I know now that loving somebody should never exclude self-love, it should empower it.


7) I will establish standards and hold on to them
I won’t tolerate being treated badly anymore. I know I deserve better. I won’t stick around when I know I have to walk away. I refuse to be strung along.

I won’t allow anybody to mess with my feelings and complicate my life. There is someone out there who will show me that love should never make me suffer.

I will add to this list as time goes by, I am sure. All I know is that with these new rules, things are already getting better.

I am more satisfied with myself and my life. And that’s where it all begins. Within me.

I am not closing myself off from love but I am guarding my heart for now. I am keeping it as safe as it can be until somebody who deserves a chance to be there comes along.



bolding mine

SHE BELONGS TO THE STREETS


"I sometimes admire myself, and all the women who have been in my shoes. We’ve fallen so many times but we find a way to rise again. Stronger, bolder and more determined to push forward."

She'll be back to the bad boys on Tinder on Friday night,  getting some dick.

Kharn

I'm a bad boy

Woof.
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She isn't that attractive.  She is average at best.

First post nails it.

Pun intended.

She’ll date the same kind of guy over and over and over until she’s no longer attractive at all.  Then she’ll settle.

Seen the pattern dozens of times.

Women crave the drama associated with stormy relationships and being used. It gives them some sort of female street cred.

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A relationship expert huh ?

Sounds like you’re a relationship moron to me .

"Relationship expert"
Physician, heal thyself.

Sounds like she realized what most women realize at some point or another.

Maybe it just took her a bit longer.

I feel terrible for the next "nice guy" she suckers.

She's gonna reinvent herself, become the nice sweet girl, with noooo problems. Swindle the well-meaning average guy, get bored or upset, and stare at that list to remind herself "NO Leah! "No!"

To realize SHE is the problem and not the guys she is into dating?

No, she hasn't figured out that yet.

This always cracks me up when some bored out skank with a 1000 cock stare suddenly demands some poor fucker treat her like a princess despite decades of riding the shitbag cock carousel.

Maybe, maybe not. She wrote about establishing boundaries and expectations, about not allowing herself to be used and manipulated and deceived. I think those are a good start. Don’t we council men here to do the same thing?

I doubt she's capable of a healthy solid relationship without going to therapy first.

not even decades

i've seent this in profiles from women in their 20s and early 30s - "I'm done wasting time", "I'm done playing games" etc

Good luck with that, babe.

Y’all make an awful lot of assumptions and judgements about a woman writing a blog about doing the exact thing y’all say women should do, and that you council men to do.

“...no more Booty calls...”




So, she’s DTF?

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2/3 of women (it's the same for men) are overweight or obese...she's above average

In my uneducated guess, I would think she has some sort of trauma or abuse in her past that leads her to seek out abusive or manipulative men who end up using her. That is assuming the men she's refering to are in fact abusive, manipulative or whatever..

Her needing to write it out as an affirmation to remind herself not to commit self harm tells me she has some form of addiction to it and a low sense of worth. She'll transform herself best she can, get someone who treats her well and will begin to doubt her worth and question why she deserves happiness. At the first sign of trouble she'll think she's going to be abandoned again and will act out by texting the stable of men she has to receive attention, which will lead to sex. Then she'll be caught in a cycle of guilt, substance abuse and low self esteem, that will lead to a break up.

Then she'll go fuck around again, then read her affirmations, and go find a new nice guy to play psychiatrist, maybe get herself knocked up for sure to lock him in.

Nah, just a moron.
She don't even know 'relationship'.

She must be 22 or sumthn anyways and yet 'she teaches, she pours'

Canuck incel thread



based?

Recognizing the issue [herself and not the guys she dates] doesn't mean she will change. She likes and enjoys the drama [he's a bad boy, I can change him, he is in demand] even though she sounds like she has known better for many relationships but chooses them anyways. Until age takes it's toll, she will continue to choose poorly until she is no longer attractive to bad boys.

It's just what human nature is. And yes, both sexes do it, it isn't just a female thing.

This sounds like my old neighbor that I was banging.

She was letting me bang her because I was a “bad boy” with tattoos and a long beard. She found a badder boy on the internet, two timezones away and moved in with him sight unseen.

More tattoos,  felon, junkie,  knocked her up and kicked her out 7 months pregnant. Right after she gave up the kid to adoptive lesbian parents, she hit me up begging for rent money. I declined.

She moved back to MI in with her parents and hit me up again. She is talking to another out of state loser too. I’m keeping out of it. She can learn that lesson the hard way herself.

Sounds like she's going her own way! Her other dating strategies weren't working so she's trying something else. So what's the issue other than she has a vagina?

outofbattery is an expert in everything who pours his knowledge into snark.


    Way to make yourself sound self important and obnoxious but keep trying sweetie,someone will settle for you one day ????

She sounds like an idiot who chases Prince Charmings and rich guys without realizing they are just lying to get in her pants.

A lot of women seek out what they perceive as broken men and try to “fix” them. This rarely works out. This cycle goes and goes. Her writing this declaration to herself down is her crash phase. In a month she will be right back at it seeking out unhealthy relationships. When she hits 35 she will be asking where are all the good men at? Why she is alone? She will of course blame men rather than take self responsibility.

She doesn't answer the all-important question:will she put out at a frequency to keep her partner satisfied, or does she think that sex is a tool she can use to get what she wants.

That’s what women seem to have a hard time with. They over complicate us. Feed us, fuck us, let us be ourselves. That’s it.

Exactly, she's the type of woman I would date to get laid and quickly extricate myself from the relationship.  She's not attracting or dating toxic men, she's bringing the toxicity out of men.  She's the shallow woman seeking shallow men because she saw one too many Disney flicks and developed a distorted sense of reality.  Thank God, I'm out of the dating scene...if I found myself single tomorrow, I would just do the sugar-daddy hookups.  It would be cheaper and much easier in the long run.  

keep us updated on your crusade to everlasting love OP

ROCK6

So she’s friendzoning the wrong guys again?

It's sad. I'm not perfect so can't judge to harshly, but that was my imaginary image of her based on the stuff she was talking about. She seems unhappy even though she's a relationship expert lol.

Social media has really warped a lot of women’s minds into over estimating their real value.

GD "Monday Morning Quarterbacking" in the psychology and sociology realms. Everyone's an expert and no one has any credentials. Always entertaining

Did you really expect the ‘He-Man-Woman-Haters-Club’ to behave any differently?

“Only way you get some pussy if the bitch die and will it to you.... and then, ‘maybe’!!...”

They wouldn’t know what to do with a real woman, anyway, so have a good laugh at their expense.

Well.........

Meanwhile, the actual good solid guy is STILL sitting at home trying to figure out why he can't find anyone decent.


BTW, if yall dont think she is attractive, well, go give your boyfriend a kiss.....

??? ??? ? ?????? ??? ???????

Canuck MGTOW thread. Red Pill.

I fail to see any unreasonable expectations here.

The red flag for me if I saw her profile when I was single is the fact she felt the need to post this at all.

The allure of the bad boy is that she can never actually "have" him. He's a mystery, an enigma, a puzzle to figure out. He'll always be one step out of her reach. Women are fascinated by men like that. It's their crack cocaine. Good men are boring. There is no thrill of the chase. Women know they can actually have them. They are reliable and stable. They don't have mystery to them. Women are not challenged by that and are not drawn to it sexually.

That's why they keep going back to the bad boys. Because bad boys are not predictable. They are a constant, unopened present waiting for them. Those qualities are addictive to women, like any drug. That's just the nature of their wiring.

It's not just the heart that wants what it wants.

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Medusa?