Mas que porra é essa que você falou sobre mim, seu arrombado? Fique sabendo que eu me formei com honra no Exército Brasileiro, e estive envolvido em diversos ataques secretos ao Comando Vermelho, e tenho mais de 300 mortes confirmadas. Não só sou treinado em táticas de gorila como também sou o melhor sniper em todo o BOPE. Pra mim você num passa de mais um alvo. Vou comer esse seu cuzinho com uma precisão nunca antes vista nesse planeta, marque minhas palavras, parça. Você pensa que pode sair por aí falando merda na Internet? Pense de novo, cuzão. Enquanto você lê isso eu tô falando com minha rede secreta de espiões espalhados pelo Brasil e seu IP está sendo localizado então melhor se preparar pra treta, viado. A treta que vai acabar com essa bosta patética que vicê chama de vida. Você tá morto, moleque. Posso estar em qualquer lugar, a qualquer hora, e posso te matar de setecentas maneiras diferentes, e isso só com minhas próprias mãos. Não só eu sou treinado em capoeira e jiu jitsu brasileiro, como também tenho acesso a todo o arsenal da Marinha Brasileira e vou usar isso tudo pra expulsar esse seu cu da face do continente, seu merdinha. Se tu soubesse a maldição que seu comentário “esperto” traria sobre você, talvez você tivesse calado tua boca. Mas não, você não fechou o bico, e vai pagar por isso, seu idiota do caralho. Vou cagar fúria em cima de você até tu se afogar. Você tá fudido, moleque.

Nope

Okie dokey

Somebody forgot to Google translate.

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I came into this thread expecting Star Wars inspired mariachi band.

Son I am disappoint.

What in Davy Jones’ locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat? I’ll have ye know I be the meanest cutthroat on the seven seas, and I’ve led numerous raids on fishing villages, and raped over 300 wenches. I be trained in hit-and-run pillaging and be the deadliest with a pistol of all the captains on the high seas. Ye be nothing to me but another source o’ swag. I’ll have yer guts for garters and keel haul ye like never been done before, hear me true. You think ye can hide behind your newfangled computing device? Think twice on that, scallywag. As we parley I be contacting my secret network o’ pirates across the sea and yer port is being tracked right now so ye better prepare for the typhoon, weevil. The kind o’ monsoon that’ll wipe ye off the map. You’re sharkbait, fool. I can sail anywhere, in any waters, and can kill ye in o’er seven hundred ways, and that be just with me hook and fist. Not only do I be top o’ the line with a cutlass, but I have an entire pirate fleet at my beck and call and I’ll damned sure use it all to wipe yer arse off o’ the world, ye dog. If only ye had had the foresight to know what devilish wrath your jibe was about to incur, ye might have belayed the comment. But ye couldn’t, ye didn’t, and now ye’ll pay the ultimate toll, you buffoon. I’ll shit fury all over ye and ye’ll drown in the depths o’ it. You’re fish food now.

"But what the fuck did you say about me, you broken-in? Know that I graduated with honor from the Brazilian Army, and have been involved in several secret attacks on Comando Vermelho, and I have more than 300 confirmed deaths. Not only am I trained in gorilla tactics, I am also the best sniper in the entire BOPE. For me you are just another target. I'll eat your ass with a precision never seen before on this planet, mark my words, it seems. Do you think you can go around talking shit on the Internet? Think again, asshole. As you read this I'm talking to my secret network of spies all over Brazil and your IP is being located so better to prepare for bullshit, fag. The bullshit that will end this pathetic crap that you call life. You're dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in seven hundred different ways, and that's only with my own hands. Not only am I trained in capoeira and Brazilian jiu jitsu, but I also have access to the entire arsenal of the Brazilian Navy and I will use all this to expel your ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If you knew the curse that your “smart” comment would bring on you, maybe you would have shut up. But no, you didn't close your beak, and you're going to pay for it, you fucking idiot. I will shit fury on you until you drown. You're fucked, kid. as i also have access to the entire arsenal of the brazilian navy and i will use all this to expel your ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If you knew the curse that your “smart” comment would bring on you, maybe you would have shut up. But no, you didn't close your beak, and you're going to pay for it, you fucking idiot. I will shit fury on you until you drown. You're fucked, kid. as i also have access to the entire arsenal of the brazilian navy and i will use all this to expel your ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If you knew the curse that your “smart” comment would bring on you, maybe you would have shut up. But no, you didn't close your beak, and you're going to pay for it, you fucking idiot. I will shit fury on you until you drown. You're fucked, kid."

But what the fuck did you say about me, you broken-in? Know that I graduated with honor from the Brazilian Army, and have been involved in several secret attacks on Comando Vermelho, and I have more than 300 confirmed deaths. Not only am I trained in gorilla tactics, I am also the best sniper in the entire BOPE. For me you are just another target. I will eat your ass with a precision never seen before on this planet, mark my words, it seems. Do you think you can go around talking shit on the Internet? Think again, asshole. As you read this I'm talking to my secret network of spies all over Brazil and your IP is being located so better to prepare for bullshit, fag. The bullshit that will end this pathetic crap that you call life. You're dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in seven hundred different ways, and that's only with my own hands. Not only am I trained in capoeira and Brazilian jiu jitsu, but I also have access to the entire arsenal of the Brazilian Navy and I will use all this to expel your ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If you knew the curse that your “smart” comment would bring on you, maybe you would have shut up. But no, you didn't close your beak, and you're going to pay for it, you fucking idiot. I'll shit fury over you until you drown. You're fucked, kid

According to Google Translate




Edit: beat like big mike's weiner

No gracias, cabron
Estoy bien

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por que?

Só comentas merda meu. Hoje já vi um monte de comentários teus só a dizer merda sem uma única vez dizeres algo on topic ou produtivo. Deixa-te de spam por favor

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Dos tacos poorpavour.

Sorry.  I don't speak or read WB.

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Voc est ciente de que existem pessoas neste mundo que tm uma condio mdica severa que as torna assim?  Minha me, por exemplo,  uma dessas pessoas.  Ela  uma caminhoneira que tem problemas nos joelhos e nas costas por dirigir o caminho, mas provavelmente voc tambm no se importa com esse caso.  Bem, eu no sou uma daquelas pessoas que tenho 6'4 "245 libras e fao exerccios todos os dias. Eu adoraria ver voc dizer algo como minha me na minha frente. Provavelmente nunca acontecer, embora voc provavelmente seja apenas uma internet  cara duro. Duvido muito que voc diria isso na cara de algum. Foi s o que pensei. O que voc acha. Oh, sinto muito, voc provavelmente no tem crebro. Eu, por outro lado, ficarei feliz em comprar uma passagem de avio para voc  para vir aqui e ver se voc tem coragem de dizer isso a algum que conheo.

Maradona was better than Pele. And Ronaldinho looks fucking inbred.

I can read some, but not a ton.  With weird tildes it’s not Italian so it must be Portuguese.

Which, coincidentally, it what I’ve always said Dave Matthews singing sounds like.

Sounds like chicken clucking in here.

I got you, amigo.

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Nao fazer tempestade  em copa de agua

eu quero ser um carioca

Don't habla.

Won't habla.

Ain't gonna habla.

Wtf

Meu avô fumou a vida inteira. Eu tinha uns 10 anos quando minha mãe lhe disse, "Se você pensa em ver seus netos se formarem, você tem que parar imediatamente". Uma lágrima escorreu dos olhos dele quando entendeu exatamente o que estava em jogo. Ele parou na hora. Três anos depois ele faleceu de câncer de pulmão. Foi muito triste e me deixou completamente sem chão. Minha mãe me disse "Nunca fume. Por favor, não faça sua família sofrer do jeito que seu avô nos fez". Eu obedeci. Aos 28, eu nunca sequer encostei num cigarro. Mas devo dizer, eu sinto um leve arrependimento por nunca ter feito isso, por que seu post me deu câncer mesmo assim

Identifique-se sexualmente como um helicóptero de ataque. Desde menino, sonhava em voar alto sobre os campos de petróleo, jogando cargas pegajosas e quentes sobre estrangeiros nojentos. As pessoas me dizem que ser um helicóptero é impossível e eu sou um retardado, mas não me importo, sou bonita. Estou pedindo a um cirurgião plástico que instale lâminas rotativas, canhões de 30 mm e mísseis AMG-114 Hellfire em meu corpo. De agora em diante, quero que vocês me chamem de “Apache” e respeitem meu direito de matar de cima e matar desnecessariamente. Se você não pode me aceitar, você é um helifóbulo e precisa verificar seu privilégio de veículo. Obrigado por ser tão compreensivo

Nein sprecken zie gobbledy-gook.

dupe

¡Sierra Del Fuego!...



...aye way

This

I habla because Spain is fucking awesome. Check out San Sebastián.

Demasiado Largo/No Leyo

Portuguese

Came in looking for Marica Haze.  I leave disappointed.

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Spanish to English, then English to Spanish X3 via google translate:
But what the hell did you say about me? Did you come in Know that I graduated with honor from the Brazilian Army, and I have been involved in several secret attacks on the Vermelho Command, and I have more than 300 confirmed deaths. Not only am I trained in gorilla tactics, I am also the best sniper in the entire BOPE. For me you are one more goal. I'll eat your ass with precision never seen before on this planet, remember my words, it seems. Do you think you can talk shit on the internet? Think again, asshole. As you read this, I'm talking to my secret spy network all over Brazil and your IP is being better tracked to prepare you for shit, you fag. The shit that will end this pathetic garbage you call life. You're dead boy I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in seven hundred different ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I trained in capoeira and Brazilian jiu jitsu, but I also have access to the entire Brazilian Navy arsenal and I will use all of this to get your butt off the face of the continent, shit. If you knew the curse your "clever" comment would bring you, perhaps you would have shut up. But no, you didn't shut up and you're going to pay for it, you fucking idiot. I will shit you furiously until you drown. You're screwed, boy. as I also have access to the entire arsenal of the Brazilian army and I will use all this to get your ass off the face of the continent, shit. If you knew the curse your "clever" comment would bring you, perhaps you would have shut up. But no, you didn't shut up and you're going to pay for it, you fucking idiot. I will shit you furiously until you drown. You're screwed, boy. as I also have access to the entire arsenal of the Brazilian army and I will use all this to get your ass off the face of the continent, shit. If you knew the curse your "clever" comment would bring you, perhaps you would have shut up. But no, you didn't shut up and you're going to pay for it, you fucking idiot. I will shit you furiously until you drown. You're screwed, boy. "

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I can read Spanish pretty well. And then I someone posts Portuguese and it takes me a moment to realize what I'm seeing. For a bit I worry why nothing makes sense.

Google translate to English:

But what the fuck did you say about me, you broken-in? Know that I graduated with honor from the Brazilian Army, and have been involved in several secret attacks on Comando Vermelho, and I have more than 300 confirmed deaths. Not only am I trained in gorilla tactics, I am also the best sniper in the entire BOPE. For me you are just another target. I will eat your ass with a precision never seen before on this planet, mark my words, it seems. Do you think you can go around talking shit on the Internet? Think again, asshole. As you read this I'm talking to my secret network of spies all over Brazil and your IP is being located so better to prepare for bullshit, fag. The bullshit that will end this pathetic crap that you call life. You're dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in seven hundred different ways, and that's only with my own hands. Not only am I trained in capoeira and Brazilian jiu jitsu, but I also have access to the entire arsenal of the Brazilian Navy and I will use all this to expel your ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If you knew the curse that your “smart” comment would bring on you, maybe you would have shut up. But no, you didn't close your beak, and you're going to pay for it, you fucking idiot. I'll shit fury over you until you drown. You're fucked, kid.

Google translated 15 times to random languages then back to English:

Remembering in hell, I received a letter of praise from the Brazilian army, saying that I had participated in a secret attack on the Vermeiro regime and that more than 300 people had been killed. I not only know terrorist tactics, but I am better than a pop gun. I have no other goals. I have never eaten on your planet as I am on this earth right now. You know what I mean, do you think you can speak directly? Stupid, think again. As you read this article, I am talking to all my spies in Brazil, your pill is the best way to teach same-sex couples. These are useless things that can end the pain and madness that life brings. Guys, you're dead. I could kill you anywhere, anytime, in seven ways, this is just my hand. I not only trained the Brazilians of Capoeira and Gu-Jitsu, but I have all the equipment of the Brazilian navy and use them all over Africa. If you know the curse, it can stop your "wise" character. But no, you're not going to cover your nose, you're paying, you're stupid. Before I can dream, I will confuse you. The boy is asleep
Weapons do not cause violence, so there are no flowers.

Você está bem irmão?

que Deus te abençoe sempre

perverso

But what the fuck did you say about me, you broken-in? Know that I graduated with honor from the Brazilian Army, and have been involved in several secret attacks on Comando Vermelho, and I have more than 300 confirmed deaths. Not only am I trained in gorilla tactics, I am also the best sniper in the entire BOPE. For me you are just another target. I will eat your ass with a precision never seen before on this planet, mark my words, it seems. Do you think you can go around talking shit on the Internet? Think again, asshole. As you read this I'm talking to my secret network of spies all over Brazil and your IP is being located so better to prepare for bullshit, fag. The bullshit that will end this pathetic crap that you call life. You're dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in seven hundred different ways, and that's only with my own hands. Not only am I trained in capoeira and Brazilian jiu jitsu, but I also have access to the entire arsenal of the Brazilian Navy and I will use all this to expel your ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If you knew the curse that your “smart” comment would bring on you, maybe you would have shut up. But no, you didn't close your beak, and you're going to pay for it, you fucking idiot. I'll shit fury over you until you drown. You're fucked, kid.