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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:15:36 PM EDT
[#1]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
If your system reacts that badly to a little kitchen filth then you have weak genes. In older times you would have died and our species wouldn't be saddled with your weakness any more. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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It's all well and good until it gives you food poisoning so bad you don't fully recover for a year ... Haven't had grocery store rotisserie chicken since.  If your system reacts that badly to a little kitchen filth then you have weak genes. In older times you would have died and our species wouldn't be saddled with your weakness any more. ^^^^^ that's funny. |
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:16:43 PM EDT
[#2]
Good but gets old fast.
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:23:08 PM EDT
[#3]
Quote HistoryQuoted: The ones at Sam's Club are pretty good for $4 or whatever they are. Yes, and they don't overcook them like the local supermarkets do. More than once I have decimated one of these, right in the parking lot. Just overwhelmed by the awesome nostril olfactory stimulation. |
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:28:18 PM EDT
[#4]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Yes, and they don't overcook them like the local supermarkets do. More than once I have decimated one of these, right in the parking lot. Just overwhelmed by the awesome nostril olfactory stimulation. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
The ones at Sam's Club are pretty good for $4 or whatever they are. Yes, and they don't overcook them like the local supermarkets do. More than once I have decimated one of these, right in the parking lot. Just overwhelmed by the awesome nostril olfactory stimulation. 8 days upon the road and I'm gonna eat some chicken tonight 
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:28:39 PM EDT
[#5]
They sure beat what you get for $6 at whatever fast food place. Better yet is roasting your own 6+ pounder for $10.
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:28:44 PM EDT
[#6]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Thanks Pops, but I know how to raise and feed my family. Sometimes cheap and easy is the only way to get it done. I do have a smoker that practically never cools down, and placing a whole, split chicken on it is the way to go. But unless you raise your own cattle, chickens and vegetables...someone else is doing the majority of the work for YOU too. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Supermarket version of a gas station rollerdog. I don't trust them. I would (and do) eat a gas station hot dog before I ate one of those chickens in the plastic container sitting under the (luke) warming lights. If you have a child and work full time, you are doing yourself a great disservice. It's very easy and convenient to swing into Kroger or Giant Eagle and grab a chicken, beans, mashed taters and corn and walk out spending only $10. Since my wife and kid hate the dark meat, I just make chicken taco's with that meat the next day. YOU are doing your family a great disservice serving them that shit. It's very easy and convenient to cook several meals on the weekends for week nights. There are also more than a few meals that can be cooked in a half hour to 45 minutes that put that shit to shame. Thanks Pops, but I know how to raise and feed my family. Sometimes cheap and easy is the only way to get it done. I do have a smoker that practically never cools down, and placing a whole, split chicken on it is the way to go. But unless you raise your own cattle, chickens and vegetables...someone else is doing the majority of the work for YOU too. I was just worried about bacteria in an improperly cooked / maintained chicken. Hotdogs are fully cooked and 10% salt so less chance of food poisoning. |
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:31:33 PM EDT
[#7]
Quote HistoryQuoted: ^^^^^ that's funny. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: It's all well and good until it gives you food poisoning so bad you don't fully recover for a year ... Haven't had grocery store rotisserie chicken since. If your system reacts that badly to a little kitchen filth then you have weak genes. In older times you would have died and our species wouldn't be saddled with your weakness any more. ^^^^^ that's funny.  |
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:32:21 PM EDT
[#8]
It's still early, but this may prove to be the best thread title of the year. Bravo, sir.
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:39:20 PM EDT
[#9]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Yep. My dad used the shit out of his Ronco when I was in high school. It was awesome. I ate well. I should probably pick one up now that you reminded me. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: My ex gf bought me one of those Ronco things and I shit you not it actually made some good chicken. Yep. My dad used the shit out of his Ronco when I was in high school. It was awesome. I ate well. I should probably pick one up now that you reminded me. I used to have one of those, I miss it. It actually did a pretty good job on a roast too. The rotisserie chicken from Giant Eagle here is pretty damn good too though. |
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:46:25 PM EDT
[#10]
If it's from Publix, it's #2.
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Posted: 1/9/2015 8:55:36 PM EDT
[#11]
Beer can chicken FTW
I had a plain Jane 2 burner propane grill from lowes till it finally bit the dust. Sunday morning head to the Pig for 3 3-3.5 pound chickens and corn Reach into the expanse of dry spices and whip up whatever concoction you like - rub it all over but especially Unser rage skin down to the legs Corn on the cob wrapped in 'luminum foil with pats of butter salt pepper and old bay. Chickens on the grill atop 24oz cans with the top cut out and some spices thrown in the half full can Each chicken and several ears of corn in a plastic bag twisted and sealed. Mone for me one for the parents And one for some family member or neighbor - makes you popular and nit as greasy as store bought |
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Posted: 1/9/2015 10:20:33 PM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
If your system reacts that badly to a little kitchen filth then you have weak genes. In older times you would have died and our species wouldn't be saddled with your weakness any more. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
It's all well and good until it gives you food poisoning so bad you don't fully recover for a year ... Haven't had grocery store rotisserie chicken since. If your system reacts that badly to a little kitchen filth then you have weak genes. In older times you would have died and our species wouldn't be saddled with your weakness any more. Right, because salmonella hasn't killed anyone in the recent times... 
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Posted: 1/10/2015 1:33:29 AM EDT
[#13]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Bullshit article is bull shit. I worked in one of those supermarket and the chickens come in marinated cases from Tyson. They do not come from unsold chickens in the meat department. The unsold raw chickens are tossed in a bin and picked up by an outside company for disposal. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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It's true. As if the chicken wasn't good enough (it was), they had the mind to package it in a portable plastic container, and lovingly place this container on a shelf in a building that has a tendency to bring in some beautiful women. As if this wasn't enough, they even went as far as to place a sweet little bar code on the side of the fragile plastic chicken coffin. Those crafty wizards of science. True miracle makers you are, you chicken cooking grocery store people. Bravo, you creepy bastards. With this being said, I can honestly and firmly say that rotisserie chickens are mankind's 3rd greatest achievement. The number 87 and yoga pants are clearly take first and second place, respectively. Birth control takes 4th place. That is all. You are dismissed. http://www.kcet.org/living/food/the-nosh/grocery-store-rotisserie-chickens.html Bullshit article is bull shit. I worked in one of those supermarket and the chickens come in marinated cases from Tyson. They do not come from unsold chickens in the meat department. The unsold raw chickens are tossed in a bin and picked up by an outside company for disposal. Well, that would explain why they all have the same shitty seasonings.
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Posted: 1/10/2015 1:45:17 AM EDT
[#14]
I'll pick one up once in awhile, or roast one myself. The wife and I eat part of it, then I make soup out of the rest that lasts a couple of days.
Overall, I like fried chicken a lot better though. |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 1:52:59 AM EDT
[#15]
OP .... An outstandingly excellent observation and spoken too like a true master of the word
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Posted: 1/10/2015 1:57:27 AM EDT
[#16]
I went to the grocery store to buy a chicken to roast tomorrow.
I made some brine and am going to try a new one out. It was a gallon of water, cup of salt, 1/2 cup of brown sugar, table spoon of whole peppercorn, and all spice. I didn't have any allspice so I just mixed up a bunch of different seasonings and boiled it. I'll soak it until tomorrow and then rub seasoning under the skin and then put it in a plastic container and shake it to completely cover the chicken in seasoning and the put it in the roaster. It will be awesome. I know that people say brining doesn't work, but it seems to make them WAY more moist to me. I've never used anything but salt so I'm interested to see if it will add taste into the chicken. |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 2:00:07 AM EDT
[#17]
We get them at Costco every time we go.
At 4.99 its hard to pass up a delicious chicken..
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Posted: 1/10/2015 2:01:24 AM EDT
[#18]
I'm always nervous I'm going to pick one up that's been sitting out too long
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Posted: 1/10/2015 2:03:28 AM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I went to the grocery store to buy a chicken to roast tomorrow. I made some brine and am going to try a new one out. It was a gallon of water, cup of salt, 1/2 cup of brown sugar, table spoon of whole peppercorn, and all spice. I didn't have any allspice so I just mixed up a bunch of different seasonings and boiled it. I'll soak it until tomorrow and then rub seasoning under the skin and then put it in a plastic container and shake it to completely cover the chicken in seasoning and the put it in the roaster. It will be awesome. I know that people say brining doesn't work, but it seems to make them WAY more moist to me. I've never used anything but salt so I'm interested to see if it will add taste into the chicken. |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 2:08:36 AM EDT
[#20]
A staple for my household. The Lemon-Pepper Publix one is my favorite, I mean how can you go wrong for dinner for the family one night and left-overs/lunch meat for 1-2 times? I like to do a beer-can chicken or spatchcock chicken on the Big Greem Egg but when you don't feel like cooking, it's hard to go wrong.
Costco's are the best deal as its a big bird for $5 FYI. |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 2:11:26 AM EDT
[#21]
I've been in the HEB by my house in the morning when they cook them. Roughly an entire battalion of chickens go into an oven the size of my living room. They do the same thing in the afternoon. If you get the store after 1930 there are none to be found. That should tell you something. Fresh French bread goes at about the same rate.
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Posted: 1/10/2015 2:17:24 AM EDT
[#22]
showtime for the win
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Posted: 1/10/2015 2:41:56 AM EDT
[#23]
The rotisserie chickens from my local grocery stores are greasy and kind of nasty. I used to buy "hot lamp" chickens from smaller stores. The birds were a bit smaller and sold in a foil lined bag. They were covered with paprika, and weren't too greasy or too dry. Actually, I've been eating fast food and take out food for so many years that none of it really tastes that good any more. Time to start cookin' again.
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Posted: 1/10/2015 2:45:38 AM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
It's all well and good until it gives you food poisoning so bad you don't fully recover for a year ... Haven't had grocery store rotisserie chicken since. You got one hell of a gutbug... I've heard of that happening, and now must join in the banishing ceremony of my people (since I also rely too heavily on the store-bought rotisserie chicken)..."Lalalalalalala...can't hear you! Lalalalalala..."
Actually, I have heard of this happening through a frighteningly normal variety of ways of eating out / getting dinner. A co-worker of mine ate out at a very popular local Mexican (Americanized Mexican) restaurant, and got some stomach bug that almost killed her. She got some sort of "alien" intestinal flora that took a year to finally eradicate...her docs were talking about actually doing one of those intestinal flora transplant to clear out the "bad" ones. No one else in her large family party got sick, and they all shared bits and bites of each others' food. It is really sobering how fast a food-borne pathogen can wreck your life, even in these days of good refrigeration, pasteurization, and all that good stuff. I can't even imagine how scary it was for our ancestors before all our modern safeguards. |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 2:46:31 AM EDT
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I used to dig them, but not anymore. The meat always seems mushy/mealy compared to other cooking methods. |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 3:03:44 AM EDT
[#26]
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Posted: 1/10/2015 3:05:38 AM EDT
[#27]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Did these last weekend on my weber kettel. It was in the low 30s, lol. Wife did good with the christmas gift http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/a285/2000Z3M/20150102_152544_zps706e4ee4.jpg |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 3:17:29 AM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
OP .... An outstandingly excellent observation and spoken too like a true master of the word Why thank you. I like to mix it up every now and then. I've always enjoyed writing, until I found myself in college and getting an ass chewing for trying to write papers while drunk. They didn't like that, too much. Now I just wield any skill that I have like a finely honed saber, forged from pure awesome. 
Back to the chicken: Apparently, a lot of places fuck this up. The grocery store in town has at least 2 big ass ovens with rows of those chicken spinners. They look like some seriously high end pieces of equipment. They're like 5 feet tall and at least 3 feet wide. They keep them clean, too. The whole deli, cooking, and meat counter area is absolutely spotless. I guess Missouri must have some kind of "hot women must wear yoga pants when they bend over near the meat counter" law. I guess the penalty for breaking that rule must be rather severe, because they never manage to forget. I don't know what the deal is, but damn, I know where my chicken purchasing is going to take place. It cracks me up when some of these ladies are examining a steak. Some of them stand there, half bent over, tilting their heads from side to side like they're trying to read hieroglyphs that were written in a size 6 font. It can be a very strange scene. Thankfully we have an awesome deli at the local supermarket. They get a metric shit ton of business up there. It's a real busy store, at most hours of the day. Then, on the other hand, if you go to the supermarket at the next town over... and they have razor thin slices of spongy looking meat, some of which have turned colors that I would not want to eat. Their deli consists of a bag of Doritos, a box of stale donuts, and some flat soda. Poor bastards. Their freezers are hardly what I would consider "freezing." I guess these chicken haters that have been posting tonight must visit grocery stores similar to what is located in "THAT town." |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 3:29:49 AM EDT
[#29]
This is my family.
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Posted: 1/10/2015 3:29:59 AM EDT
[#30]
Years ago in Los Angeles we used to picinic at the company rec center. Wife would pick up take out and meet me after work with kids and have picinic and then use the pool for a while.
On one of those occasions she picked up a supermarket rotisserie chicken. We had eaten most of it when I broke it open. Oops. Insides were full of cooked maggots. No one died.
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Posted: 1/10/2015 3:38:18 AM EDT
[#31]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
We get them at Costco every time we go. At 4.99 its hard to pass up a delicious chicken.. This Also the chicken salad from Costco is made from left over rotisserie chicken. It's really tasty. I use two rotisserie chickens as a cheater for chicken and dumplings. Publix Mojo flavor is my favorite though. Costco is second. All these chickens are time stamped with a "sell by" hour. They don't let them sit under the heat all day long. I can't buy fresh and cook it myself for the price of these birds. |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 5:31:54 AM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryThis is one of the funniest commercials I've seen in a long time. |
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Posted: 1/10/2015 5:44:14 AM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My ex gf bought me one of those Ronco things and I shit you not it actually made some good chicken. Showtime rotisserie is hokey but effective. Much better to roll your own at home. 
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Posted: 1/18/2015 6:30:07 PM EDT
[#34]
Bought one at Costco on Thursday. The chickens are smaller (inflation - thank you Osama Ben Ber Nank) and they cook it the same amount of time. Result? Dry chicken.
I chopped some up for chicken salad and even then it's still dry. About the only thing it's good for is chicken soup.
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Posted: 1/18/2015 6:36:44 PM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Beer can chicken? Spatchcocked chicken > Beer can chicken. 
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Posted: 1/18/2015 6:44:28 PM EDT
[#36]
Rotisserie chicken allows perpetually single men to play like they have a real live woman cooking for them.
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Posted: 1/18/2015 6:46:39 PM EDT
[#37]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I buy one there every Saturday. Think about it. It's already cooked and hot to go for $5 and you take it home and put some veggies on and a salad and you have a good meal. Debone it and use it over the next two days. So you have gotten at least three suppers or lunches for $5. Win!! Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: The ones at Sam's Club are pretty good for $4 or whatever they are. I buy one there every Saturday. Think about it. It's already cooked and hot to go for $5 and you take it home and put some veggies on and a salad and you have a good meal. Debone it and use it over the next two days. So you have gotten at least three suppers or lunches for $5. Win!! I like the Sam's chicken, but something about rolling your own is better.
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Posted: 1/18/2015 6:48:16 PM EDT
[#38]
I'd eat them more often if I could just get the dark meat.
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Posted: 1/18/2015 7:05:51 PM EDT
[#39]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Rotisserie chicken allows perpetually single men to play like they have a real live woman cooking for them. Yep, and no nagging. |
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Posted: 1/18/2015 7:08:07 PM EDT
[#40]
I've been picking these up from Costco ever since you started this thread, OP. Wish I could buy ya a beer!
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Posted: 1/18/2015 7:08:31 PM EDT
[#41]
Beer is #1
...
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Posted: 1/18/2015 7:36:49 PM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Yep, and no nagging. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Rotisserie chicken allows perpetually single men to play like they have a real live woman cooking for them. Yep, and no nagging. And if you wear a condom, you don't ruin the meal when you have sex with the warm bird first.... |
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Posted: 1/18/2015 7:47:53 PM EDT
[#43]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
And if you wear a condom, you don't ruin the meal when you have sex with the warm bird first.... Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Rotisserie chicken allows perpetually single men to play like they have a real live woman cooking for them. Yep, and no nagging. And if you wear a condom, you don't ruin the meal when you have sex with the warm bird first.... You are a sick fuck! I don't care for rotisserie chicken unless I make it but now, after reading that, I fear you or someone like you may work in a grocery store. I'm done with them forever. |
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Posted: 1/18/2015 7:50:04 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I'd eat them more often if I could just get the dark meat. Genetically engineered dark meat chicken.
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Posted: 1/18/2015 7:58:06 PM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
My ex gf bought me one of those Ronco things and I shit you not it actually made some good chicken. Yep. I was given and old showtime rotisserie grill by a family member and they are awesome. |
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Posted: 1/18/2015 8:02:04 PM EDT
[#46]
I agree!
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Posted: 1/18/2015 8:06:18 PM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryQuote HistoryQuoted:
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It's true. As if the chicken wasn't good enough (it was), they had the mind to package it in a portable plastic container, and lovingly place this container on a shelf in a building that has a tendency to bring in some beautiful women. As if this wasn't enough, they even went as far as to place a sweet little bar code on the side of the fragile plastic chicken coffin. Those crafty wizards of science. True miracle makers you are, you chicken cooking grocery store people. Bravo, you creepy bastards. With this being said, I can honestly and firmly say that rotisserie chickens are mankind's 3rd greatest achievement. The number 87 and yoga pants are clearly take first and second place, respectively. Birth control takes 4th place. That is all. You are dismissed. http://www.kcet.org/living/food/the-nosh/grocery-store-rotisserie-chickens.html Whoever wrote the article you linked is a large dunce. /
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Posted: 1/18/2015 8:20:15 PM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I've been in the HEB by my house in the morning when they cook them. Roughly an entire battalion of chickens go into an oven the size of my living room. They do the same thing in the afternoon. If you get the store after 1930 there are none to be found. That should tell you something. Fresh French bread goes at about the same rate. He'll yeah! I'll decimate about half the loaf on the way home. Then mop up the juices of the bird in the container when I get home.
Although a few years ago I got one that was a little undercooked and got a BAAAD case of the runny shits the next day. 
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