2-star General ripped me for stopping work when he entered the room.  I was new and unsure of the rules in the Army Operations Center in the Pentagon.  He removed that uncertainty.

I did 6 yrs enlisted i the Navy prior to going in the Marines as an Officer,

so while in Navy Boot camp a buddy of mine thought it would be funny to send me a letter addressed to "Admiral Patrick".  When the DI called for Recruit Patrick I didn't think much of it, then he said I had a ltr from home, which I thought was interesting that he'd hand deliver it.  When he read me the return address I knew my jokster buddy had done me in.  

Basically, the DI said he'd never seen an Admiral do pushups, so I dropped & asked how many.  He said "UNTIL YOU DIE!!".  So he worked me over for a while, then his buddy, another DI had never seen an Admiral doo pushups either, so I had toput on a show for him too.  It was a long couple of days.  

20 yrs later my jokster friend still laughs abt it, "Hey Man, remember that letter i sent you in boot camp".....

That was the best.  The highest ranking was when I dropped a 50 lb. steal grate in the sub while we were tracking a Soviet boomer... the COB got me after my section chief, then the Navigator, then the XO, then the CO.  At least they never asked me to clean that trap again!

ISMO

The worst one for me was from a Full Bird Colonel, he wa a Vietnam vet, had a combat ribbon stack that barely fit on his uniform. He was a NY'er and a HARD CORE MF'er who's reputation .

I was going to be standing before the man for some serious sh*t, not courtmarshal material, but NJP Article 15. Having stood before the man on two occasions prior -not this man though- I wasn't scared. But when my First Sgt came out of his office to bring me in for the proceedings, his face told a story, I've never seen the First Shirt look worried before and now I was concerned about my fate.

I walked in behind the First Sgt, faced the Colonel, snapped to attenion and reported as ordered.

The 'Man' didn't say anything for a moment, he sat there and gave me a stare that was more like a challenge. It was like he was waiting for me to say something, anything, so he could justify using violence. You could feel this dudes stare, it was intense. I tried to keep my eyes focused 2" above his head at a point on the wall, but I had to look because I wanted to get a read on him to see if he was really Hard Core or just perceived as such. I eyeballed him for a moment and didn't like what I saw. He was a fierce looking Marine and when I looked at him I knew I was in deep sh*t. Now I was scared and it probably showed on my face. The silence was no longer than 30 seconds, but it was too long for me, I was loosing my composure, anxious as hell and uncertain about what this crazy bastard was going to do. Adrenaline was flowing, I shook from it, and hoped it would end soon.

It was unfuc*ing real that another man could do that to me. There were four or five Marines in that room, but it was hard to notice anyone but the Man. The Colonel finally spoke, he told everyone to stand at ease. He directed me to a spot in front of his desk. My First Sgt advanced as well, taking a spot on my left, and slightly behind me. Another Marine read the charges, the way it was worded made them sound really bad. You could see he Man was really angry at this point.

The Colonel stood up and stared me down again, ony this time he was really fuc*ing close to me. His face was turning red and he went on a tirade, his voice was rugged and he spoke loud, fast and clear. At one point he started to loose it, it was fuc*ing explosive, he got right in my face and went on a tirade, the likes of which I've never seen a human being do before, his face was contorted, he looked possesed...





One time I was driving a jeep and got flagged down by a Major General, the Commander of the base. Of all Marines on base I get the HMIC(Head MF'er In Charge). Most of the time it's someone from your Company, a enlisted guy. My jeep was unsat too, I ws smoking a cigarette and had a coke can as an ash tray, I had it shoved in the grab bar on the passenger side.

The general asked me if that was regulation, he chewed me out a little at first, but then he was cool about it. He said at least you had the courtesy to use an ash tray.

Article 15 during MOS Traning for coming back to barracks after hours, drunk, and disorderly.



My excuse? Nineteen, stuuuuuuupid, and had a sick dad undergoing chemo at home.

Barracks Sgt. saw me walking towards the barracks with 2 males (the rest of the people I was waith were in a different building) and since there were 3 floors (2 male one female) the bastard waited for me on the female floor (I was a sure snag: the guys would not have been should he have picked the wrong floor to lay in wait) and once I was nabbed, would not rat the guys out.

Saw the Cptn that AM who demanded their names or an article 15....I took the 15: those guys bought me drinks when I sorely needed them...ratting them out was NOT an option!

Me and a buddy tried walking past the Base Commander (1star) without saluting outside the mess hall when I was at George AFB, it was about 5 minutes before he slowed down and let us go.

Quoted: I've never been in the military, But have an uncle who is a Master Chief, retired. He chews my ass for something everytime he's in town.

G.P.


TXL

Quoted: Quoted: I was nabbed, would not rat the guys out. Saw the Cptn that AM who demanded their names or an article 15....I took the 15: those guys bought me drinks when I sorely needed them...ratting them out was NOT an option! You ain't so bad after all.

Ballsy.  Good damn job.


TXL

I vote this as the best thread since....a long time.

Quoted: Quoted: i got dropped in the parking lot on my way in to work by a 2 star. he walked past while i was dismounting my motorcycle and i didn't see him / didn't salute. on the bright side i was in charge of his tour of the facility for the week and he was a fun guy to be around. Treated us DAMN well. LOL!  When I was a Private E-nothing, still in training, I had a brain cramp and waved at a 1-Star instead of saluting.

That's awesome!

Full bird Marine Corps Colonel.

5 minutes on the why's and where fors on saluting a superior officer.
I was in the Navy and passed him on Main side at Great Lakes with no salute.

I was in the 1st AD in the early '80s, too.  When I was an E4, I was selected to go on a Command field Exercise to drive the M151 and do data entry.  I was plotting a minefield on an early PC when someone walked in and stood next to me.  No one said anything when the person came in and all I saw at first was a pair of BDUs out of the corner of my eye.  Then I noticed a leather belt with a gold colored buckle.  THEN I looked up and saw stars.  I started to jump up and immediately got "As you were" and a bunch of questions about what I was doing.  Not exactly an ass chewing, but it was the only time I spoke with a General while I was in the Army.

Quoted: Article 15 during MOS Traning for coming back to barracks after hours, drunk, and disorderly. My excuse? Nineteen, stuuuuuuupid, and had a sick dad undergoing chemo at home. Barracks Sgt. saw me walking towards the barracks with 2 males (the rest of the people I was waith were in a different building) and since there were 3 floors (2 male one female) the bastard waited for me on the female floor (I was a sure snag: the guys would not have been should he have picked the wrong floor to lay in wait) and once I was nabbed, would not rat the guys out. Saw the Cptn that AM who demanded their names or an article 15....I took the 15: those guys bought me drinks when I sorely needed them...ratting them out was NOT an option!

I've gotta say.....you continue to impress me

I had a couple of good asschewings from my 1SG while I was in the 82d.

The first was when I was still pretty cherry.  Me and another guy were on OP one night during an FTX.  We were told that during the night, we could alternate sleeping.  They told us the best way to do it was for one guy to sleep for an hour, and then switch.  This worked for about the first three or four hours.  It was the other guys watch, and he must have fell asleep.  Sometime after the sun came up, I woke up and noticed that our '60 was gone

Top had come out and found us asleep and taken our pig.  We both got our asses chewed for a loooong time.  Then we had to dig a bunch of holes and fill 'em up.  After that, we split the OP's in half.  One guy slept for four hours, then the other guy slept for four hours.

The other asschewing from Top came when I sent a cherry down to his office looking for a PRC E8 (Prick E8). The guy ratted me out when Top asked who sent him and I got reamed pretty good.

Quoted: No Officer ever touched the ass-chewing I got from a Marine Master Gunnery Sergeant during a academic review board during EOD school, let me tell you I had no ass left and heard cuss words I never new existed.

Know a few guys that had to do that.  I doesn't sound fun.

Quoted: I've gotta say.....you continue to impress me I had a couple of good asschewings from my 1SG while I was in the 82d. The first was when I was still pretty cherry.  Me and another guy were on OP one night during an FTX.  We were told that during the night, we could alternate sleeping.  They told us the best way to do it was for one guy to sleep for an hour, and then switch.  This worked for about the first three or four hours.  It was the other guys watch, and he must have fell asleep.  Sometime after the sun came up, I woke up and noticed that our '60 was gone Top had come out and found us asleep and taken our pig.  We both got our asses chewed for a loooong time.  Then we had to dig a bunch of holes and fill 'em up.  After that, we split the OP's in half.  One guy slept for four hours, then the other guy slept for four hours. The other asschewing from Top came when I sent a cherry down to his office looking for a PRC E8 (Prick E8). The guy ratted me out when Top asked who sent him and I got reamed pretty good.

Thanks!...I have one more...but it was more of a laugh fest than a chew out by the time it was over...

Ordered to Fort Drum for our Mass Casualty field training, first nite, they picked me a CQ Runner (I was an E-4 at the time---waiting for my e-5 to come thru mind you). Well...I left with friends to hit the NCO club BEFORE the duty roster got posted...came back only to see my name at the top of the freaken list! Thanks God I had not gotten trashed! I put on my BDU's, show up at HQ and was told to go to Motor pool to pick up a pick-up to transport KP staff to the makeshift kitchen we had set up in the field.
Well, the Sarge was so pissed at me for being late to duty, he dismissed me before letting me explain that I did not hold a Military Driver's license

On the return trip back to the motor pool, My pick up got stock in the mud outside of the barracks.
I'd had it. I walked to motor pool, threw the keys and the log on the desk, told them where the damn thing was and hit the rack (it was like 4AM)
At Six, I hear top walking into the barracks booming, Where's the PRIVATE who sunk my truck?"

I answer, "Specialist, Top, Specialist!"
His reply?
"Not when *I* get thru with you!"
He dragged my sorry sleepy ass outside and demanded, "did it EVER occur to you to lock the HUBS???"
To which I replied, "What's a hub?"




That man referred to me as the 'Sinker of the Trucks' for 2 years afterwards!

Quoted: That man referred to me as the 'Sinker of the Trucks' for 2 years afterwards!

Got a couple old salty FE's that I fly with that are Chiefs.  They like to get on you a bit over stupid stuff but nothing major in my career so far as to require an entry in my record.  Actually havent been chewed out since boot camp really..



But....

Had a Meritorious Mast last week

Quoted: That man referred to me as the 'Sinker of the Trucks' for 2 years afterwards!

Oh shit.......that reminds me of another one!



This was in Germany again, spring of 1990. We were on a summer gunnery at Graf, 301 FAARP. We were up by the aircraft closing them up for the night, missions were through for the day, we were headed back down the hill to the barracks.

My guys took  the CO’s CUCV D6 up the hill to the FAARP. I ended up riding bitch as vehicle commander, sandwiched between the guy driving and the guy riding shotgun.

If your familiar with the aviator gas mask it has a separate filter canister which remains in the carrier when the mask is worn, similar to the tankers mask.

Well riding bitch I wasn’t about to have that mask canister riding into my rib cage as we drove down the bumpy tank trail back to the barracks. Before I hopped up into the truck I took my mask off my shoulder. We took off down the tank trail and I decided to toss the mask up onto the dash of the truck.

Not paying any attention I tossed the mask up onto the dash canister first and spidered the front windshield! The driver immediately slammed on the brakes, both guys just sat there staring at me with eyes as wide as silver dollars! “Sgt Quib, what the hell did you do that for!” I replied, “Yea, like I did that on purpose!” “All I did was......” and I picked up the mask to replay how I had tossed it up on the dash and as I did this the window spidered even more!

By this time my guys are freaking out, trying to come up with scenarios to tell the 1SG when we got back to the barracks. My buddy Carl who was driving says, “Don’t worry Sgt. Quib we’ll cover for ya and tell Top that as we were driving down the tank trail we passed a column of Bradely’s, a rock flew up and cracked the windshield!”

Being the NCO that I was I could not lie and confessed to Top that it was a freak accident. Well when the CO heard of what happened he threatened to cancel my leave for the next month, and I was planning on getting married!

But all ended well after they calmed down. My leave wasn’t canceled and I ended up marrying Frau Quib. I escaped with a Letter of Reprimand in my file for one year for breaking the 1 AD policy of having an unobstructed vehicle dash board!

My father is an O-6 in the USMC. I got my ass chewed off at least once a week for 18 years, then about once a month since then. I dont need to serve to know what a proper ass chewing is like.

I am reminded of the best 'tactical' lesson I ever received.

We're in a patrol harbour (AA, I guess) on a weekend exercise in the hills somewhere. Well, being a bit of downtime, we decide we can brew up a cup of tea. I stake out a suitable cooking place next to a tree. I leave my FN resting against the tree, and start brewing up.

Somewhere mid-brew, the cadre sergeant calls out a Stand-To. Jump to my feet, turn around to grab my rifle, and the bloody thing's not there. I'm shocked still. "Umm...". Thinking I might have ballsed up my memory, and actually left the rifle in my lean-to, I dash over, and find that it's not there either. Back to the tree, and look around. Not there. At this point I figure out that someone nabbed it, and that if nothing else, I should go to the perimeter with my battlebuddy and help spot targets for her, or if she gets hit, I can take her rifle.

"Does everyone have good, comfortable firing positions?" calls out the sergeant.
I raise my hand, and resignedly call out "No Sergeant"
"A soldier without his rifle is a civilian wearing green!" Words that have stayed with me ever since. Of course, he had done a tour, and if the rifle wasn't under observation, even if right next to you, he took it. Fortunately, an NCO also had her rifle nabbed, so attention was deflected away from me.


A few years later, in Basic at Knox. We're in a formation, and a DS hollers at someone from across the square, over our left shoulder. Instinctively, most of us look over to find out what was going on. Thought process in my head goes "Oh. I'm at attention. Bad move. Better go eyes front" so I snap forward again.

DS, of course, sees this and storms over, demanding that everyone who moved their heads at attention fall out and fall in 'over there'. A couple of guys fall out. I figure that "Well, it was only for a second, and I caught myself".
DS is still fuming. "Come on, I know there were more of you". I figure "Well, technically, I moved. Oh well". I resigned myself to my fate, fell out, and fell into the Line of Shame. One or two more join us, and we await our fates
"We still have people not falling out! We appear to have an integrity issue here. I know how to deal with that"
He turns to those of us in the Line of Shame, waves his hand like a kid and says 'bye-bye'.
Whilst a good portion of my co-recruits were idiots, even the most stupid of us in the Line of Shame figured this one out. We bolted for the barracks, dashed to the bay, and could hear the "Down! Up! Down! Up!... One two three THIRTY.. one two three THIRTYONE" wafting up the staircase behind us. "Do NOT look out the window, mate!"

NTM

One more good one from OCS,

we're running from breakfast back to the barracks to grab our notebooks, I'm 3rd back form the front.  We run past one fo the DI's, so the 1st guy yells "Good Morning Staff Sgt".  He replies with "Did I tell you to tal to me?  Get on your face".  Seeing this, the 2nd guy runs past saying nothing.  Big mistake, the DI says "Oh, you're gonna be an officer, so you're too good to talk to me, Huh?  Gt on our face".  Well, now I'm up at bat, do I say anything or not?

Well, I stop & drop on my face cranking out pushups.  Guess this wasn't what he was looking for either, "Oh, we have a smart ass here!".  I guess it made his mornig as he let all the other guys run past while he gave me his full attention for abt 20 minutes.  Needless to say I worked off breakfast, reported late to class all sweaty.

A Commander who happened to be the CO of my squadron. I'm embarressed now to say what I did, but he basically said I was an embarressment to the Navy and every officer who had put his name on a chit I was walking through. He did not raise his voice one time, and I felt like the lowest form of whale shit. It was a bit of a defining moment for me. It made me grow up in a hurry and change some of the stupid crap I was doing. This guy was a Nam vet with a bunch of "real" missions to his credit, was waiting for me in the hospital when I woke up from getting slammed by an A7 on the flight deck, and I genuinely looked up to him. I've never been so humbled before or since.

Had I not been really short, 2 weeks, I would have done brig time. I think he just wanted me out of his Navy. All this after 4 years of 4.0 evals. Amazing what you'll do when you're a kid.

I was doing a routine stop (erratic driving) when I realized it was the post CSM. Hell if I didn't catch it for even stopping him. BTW he was drunk as hell. I asked him to park his vehicle and then drove him home. That monday I was told I was selected to attend PLDC, I had been number 17 on the list. Promoted to SGT 6 months after I graduated. Best career move I ever made.

Quoted: One more good one from OCS, we're running from breakfast back to the barracks to grab our notebooks, I'm 3rd back form the front.  We run past one fo the DI's, so the 1st guy yells "Good Morning Staff Sgt".  He replies with "Did I tell you to tal to me?  Get on your face".  Seeing this, the 2nd guy runs past saying nothing.  Big mistake, the DI says "Oh, you're gonna be an officer, so you're too good to talk to me, Huh?  Gt on our face".  Well, now I'm up at bat, do I say anything or not? Well, I stop & drop on my face cranking out pushups.  Guess this wasn't what he was looking for either, "Oh, we have a smart ass here!".  I guess it made his mornig as he let all the other guys run past while he gave me his full attention for abt 20 minutes.  Needless to say I worked off breakfast, reported late to class all sweaty.

You're a quick thinker.  I would have probably pulled a stupid face and ended up doing push ups after being yelled at.

Wow. Tough call. Glad it worked out for you.

Quoted: I was doing a routine stop (erratic driving) when I realized it was the post CSM. Hell if I didn't catch it for even stopping him. BTW he was drunk as hell. I asked him to park his vehicle and then drove him home. That monday I was told I was selected to attend PLDC, I had been number 17 on the list. Promoted to SGT 6 months after I graduated. Best career move I ever made.

Quoted: I did 6 yrs enlisted i the Navy prior to going in the Marines as an Officer, so while in Navy Boot camp a buddy of mine thought it would be funny to send me a letter addressed to "Admiral Patrick".  When the DI called for Recruit Patrick I didn't think much of it, then he said I had a ltr from home, which I thought was interesting that he'd hand deliver it.  When he read me the return address I knew my jokster buddy had done me in.   Basically, the DI said he'd never seen an Admiral do pushups, so I dropped & asked how many.  He said "UNTIL YOU DIE!!".  So he worked me over for a while, then his buddy, another DI had never seen an Admiral doo pushups either, so I had toput on a show for him too.  It was a long couple of days.   20 yrs later my jokster friend still laughs abt it, "Hey Man, remember that letter i sent you in boot camp"..... That was the best.  The highest ranking was when I dropped a 50 lb. steal grate in the sub while we were tracking a Soviet boomer... the COB got me after my section chief, then the Navigator, then the XO, then the CO.  At least they never asked me to clean that trap again! ISMO

I'm guessing you might have gotten a reaming from a Soviet sonar operator who was straining to see if he could hear who was tailing them...if he could have gotten to you.

I once got yelled at by a supervisor cop when he was pulling me over.

But the worst was my MOTHER

Kind of off topic, but this is what I did and should have gotten the worst ass chewing of my life for..

We were at an extended AT in Hoenfels, Germany.  Cold as hell. As you may or may not know, there is some wierd porn in Germany. One of the guys got a tape where there was a guy putting his fist in a girls a**. There was going to be a division briefing later that afternoon, and the room was all set up with a videotape presentation. We pulled the regular tape , made a new label for "ours" and put it in the machine, prewound to the "scene". We were trying to look like we had nothing better to do as we were hanging out outside the building as the briefing started, looking in the windows. The briefing officer was talking, then after a few minutes he started the tape with his back turned. We started to hear the music and all hell broke loose. We lost our nerve and ran! Anyway, I probably would have gotted a bit more than an ass chewing for that, but it had to be one of the funniest pranks ever! Amazingly, nobody tied it to us, guess there were too many others around...

I got an ass chewing from my Captain for driving like a maniac on a nearby Air Force base. But afterwards, he kinda smiled...

Quoted: FWIW, I hate the term "Full Bird". Because the other one, is not a colonel

Has to do with the rank more than anything.

Quoted: ...Col John Hightower, USA (ret) ...

Black guy by any chance?

Quoted: Quoted: I've gotta say.....you continue to impress me I had a couple of good asschewings from my 1SG while I was in the 82d. The first was when I was still pretty cherry.  Me and another guy were on OP one night during an FTX.  We were told that during the night, we could alternate sleeping.  They told us the best way to do it was for one guy to sleep for an hour, and then switch.  This worked for about the first three or four hours.  It was the other guys watch, and he must have fell asleep.  Sometime after the sun came up, I woke up and noticed that our '60 was gone Top had come out and found us asleep and taken our pig.  We both got our asses chewed for a loooong time.  Then we had to dig a bunch of holes and fill 'em up.  After that, we split the OP's in half.  One guy slept for four hours, then the other guy slept for four hours. The other asschewing from Top came when I sent a cherry down to his office looking for a PRC E8 (Prick E8). The guy ratted me out when Top asked who sent him and I got reamed pretty good. Thanks!...I have one more...but it was more of a laugh fest than a chew out by the time it was over... Ordered to Fort Drum for our Mass Casualty field training, first nite, they picked me a CQ Runner (I was an E-4 at the time---waiting for my e-5 to come thru mind you). Well...I left with friends to hit the NCO club BEFORE the duty roster got posted...came back only to see my name at the top of the freaken list! Thanks God I had not gotten trashed! I put on my BDU's, show up at HQ and was told to go to Motor pool to pick up a pick-up to transport KP staff to the makeshift kitchen we had set up in the field. Well, the Sarge was so pissed at me for being late to duty, he dismissed me before letting me explain that I did not hold a Military Driver's license On the return trip back to the motor pool, My pick up got stock in the mud outside of the barracks. I'd had it. I walked to motor pool, threw the keys and the log on the desk, told them where the damn thing was and hit the rack (it was like 4AM) At Six, I hear top walking into the barracks booming, Where's the PRIVATE who sunk my truck?" I answer, "Specialist, Top, Specialist!" His reply? "Not when *I* get thru with you!" He dragged my sorry sleepy ass outside and demanded, "did it EVER occur to you to lock the HUBS???" To which I replied, "What's a hub?" That man referred to me as the 'Sinker of the Trucks' for 2 years afterwards!

Hehe....

We had gotten our new Bradley's in December of '03 and we went to Fort Riley every month because we got our new Bradley's and had to have 240hours on them of training before we were "qualified" to use them.  Well, one month while we were just starting out on them, we took them out with our Eagle instructors and had 6 people in them on the tank trails.  Each person drove for about 20mins and whatnot.

We come up to a little fishhook road where there was a road coming off the bottom of the hook but there was a creek that was like 4feet deep cuz it had just rained.  So my commander and instructor are like, "ya, blah blah, go turn around" which I was already gonna do.  And mind you, this is a wooded area with trees lining the road.  So I start to go and turn into the fishhook, they both start yelling "TREE TREE TREE TREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" and you cant see behind you in a Bradley, so I'm thinking the tree is in front but I dont see any.  So I stop and say, "where's tree?"  No reply.
So I keep turning and they are like, "TREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" and nothing else again, so I dont mind them cuz they dont say where it is.

Well we turn around and they're like, "Hey Gibbs, look at this tree over here when we pass it"  so I look and theres a tree with a chunk of bark missing like 6" into the tree.  I was like, "well jeez, good job guys, thanks for telling me WHERE the tree was!"
They are like, "we said tree!"
I was like, "whoopty fucking do!  you didnt say where!  saying TREE does me no freaking good!"

So we get back to the AO and we get out and the sponson box thats in the back that holds claymores and whatnot is all bent to hell.  The door is shifted 75* counterclockwise.  And it's welded aluminum too.

I didnt get yelled at because it wasnt my fault and Eagle still had them under warranty and fixed everything but I got made fun of SOOOOO bad.  Everyone kept asking who did it and they'd point to me but I yelled at my Commander (E-5 at the time) and said it was his fault.
He was like, "haha, ya right, screw you, you were driving!"

When I was at another squadron at my base, we were launching out a VIP pilot. In a F-16D there are two seats. Back seater was an instructor pilot (Captain), and the front seater's rank I didn't know. So this CPT comes over to look at the forms, and he looked all nervious. I was a new A1C, so I didn't quite have the "military social skills" that were needed that day. I asked the CPT "Who the hell is this guy sopposed to be?". He just looked up with this "what-are-you-doing-he's-standing-behind-you" look. So, I turn around, and it's a 3-star VIP pilot, that's flying for the hours to keep his master pilot rating. That ass chewing didn't last longer than 3 minutes, but I about passed out. Lesson learned, When you only have two stripes, don't make fun of a Lt. Gen., you won't win...

Quoted: Quoted: FWIW, I hate the term "Full Bird". Because the other one, is not a colonel Has to do with the rank more than anything.

In the Corps, you have a Lieutenant Colonel (05 pay grade) and a Colonel (06 pay grade).

The Lieutenant Colonel is called a 'Light Bird Colonel', his insignia has no bird. It's actually a silver Major insignia.

The Colonel is called a 'Full Bird' because his insignia has a mean looking shielded eagle.

I didnt get yelled at because it wasnt my fault and Eagle still had them under warranty and fixed everything but I got made fun of SOOOOO bad. Everyone kept asking who did it and they'd point to me but I yelled at my Commander (E-5 at the time) and said it was his fault. He was like, "haha, ya right, screw you, you were driving!"

LOL

Quoted: FWIW, I hate the term "Full Bird". Because the other one, is not a colonel

Old habits die hard, but I fixed it.

Quoted: The highest "ranked" ass chewing I received was from a LTC that I threatened to buttstroke with my rifle.  He was trying to violate the two man rule and kept insisting that I and my partner let him through.  Needless to say, a Full Bird Colonel overheard the exchange and went ballisitc on the LTC. The best ass chewing was from the 18th MP Brigade CSM.  The best part is that the ass chewing wasn't for me. I was off shift hanging around and the Desk Sergeant informed me that the CSM had called because someone had parked in his parking spot.  The road units were busy and the desk asked if I would go over and boot the offending vehicle.   I walked over, set the boot on the ground when the CSM saw me by the vehicle.  He came out of HQ, called me over and tore in.  After explaining, in length, his entitlement to the marked parking space, I managed to get in the fact that the vehicle wasn't mine and that I was making sure the guy didn't go anywhere.  The CSM actually apologized and said to make sure to inform him when the individual called the MP station to have the boot removed. The next day while on patrol, I get a call to report to BDE to "make meet" with the CSM.  I roll up and the CSM has a freshly reamed, V Corps, SFC at parade rest.  Needless to say, the CSM made sure the SFC apologized to me for the reaming I received the day before.  By the looks of the Sergeant, his was far worse than mine.

They don't call CSM's "Smash" for nothing.