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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Do you hang out with your dad? (Page 2 of 4)

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:00:33 PM EDT

[#1]

I go to gun shows with my dad, this way I don't have to drive

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:01:42 PM EDT

[#2]

Yes I do hang out with my Dad. We do blackpowder shoots together, he is going to mow my yard while Im deployed since the wife does not weigh enough to close the circut on our JD riding mower....

Im 42 he is 72.

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:01:51 PM EDT

[#3]

I go stay with my parents every weekend, my dad has become my best friend since I got out of high school

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:02:56 PM EDT

[#4]

I'm 50, old man is 75. We play golf together, used to go fishing together but haven't done that in a while. I got him into guns and jeeps and reintoduced him to golf after many years away from it.

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:03:40 PM EDT

[#5]

Quoted:
If you've got a good one, realize how lucky you are.

Had. But *his* father (my Grandfather) wasn't. My father never allowed the two of us to meet while he was alive. So, I understand the dynamics. I can only take my fathers word on all of this, but.....

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:06:27 PM EDT

[#6]

Quoted:

Yes I do hang out with my Dad. We do blackpowder shoots together, he is going to mow my yard while Im deployed since the wife does not weigh enough to close the circut on our JD riding mower....

Im 42 he is 72.

If she ever tries to trap you into one of those "I feel fat today and I'm going to make it your fault" kind of conversations, you have the ultimate trump card.

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:08:50 PM EDT

[#7]

My dad hasn't talked to me since i was 13. Don't know why either...

Wait, forgot when my grandma died i walked up to him and he acted like he wanted to talk then left.

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:13:14 PM EDT

[#8]

Nope, we stopped talking 7 months ago.

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:14:38 PM EDT

[#9]

Quoted:
I go to the cemetery every once in a while. Makes my wish I would have spent more time with him.

I kept looking at him thinking "man he's getting old" and wondering how much longer he'll be around.

Spend as much time as you can with your folks. I lost mine about 8 years ago and still miss being able to talk to them.

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:27:53 PM EDT

[#10]

Haven't spoken to my dad since 1991, and he only lives about a mile away from my mother. I used to pass him around town every few days or so. A few months ago I was at a pizza joint and he walked in and ordered. Walked right in front of me, as in 2 feet away, grabbed a soda and walked back to his table. I don't know if he knew it was me or not.

I guess he's laid up in a nursing home now from what i've heard, after being on life support and making it through. I'm kinda tempted to show up, not to make amends, but to get closure. He was a shithead wife beater, and back in 91 after my parents divorced, he moved to alaska out of the blue after staying local for about a year. No birthday cards, child support, nothing. He moved back this way about 10 years ago, mom gigged him for back child support, but he still has made no effort to get a hold of me, even though we have several mutual friends. The way I see it, if he would like to patch things up, it's on him to do it. I was 11 when he left, he should be the adult and admit he screwed up, but he won't.

Many of the things I've been through with the whole situation govern the way I parent today. I look at it this way, either you can let the cycle of being a shitbag continue, or learn from the mistakes of others and make your life better. I chose the latter.

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:31:45 PM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:
Haven't spoken to my dad since 1991, and he only lives about a mile away from my mother. I used to pass him around town every few days or so. A few months ago I was at a pizza joint and he walked in and ordered. Walked right in front of me, as in 2 feet away, grabbed a soda and walked back to his table. I don't know if he knew it was me or not.

I guess he's laid up in a nursing home now from what i've heard, after being on life support and making it through. I'm kinda tempted to show up, not to make amends, but to get closure. He was a shithead wife beater, and back in 91 after my parents divorced, he moved to alaska out of the blue after staying local for about a year. No birthday cards, child support, nothing. He moved back this way about 10 years ago, mom gigged him for back child support, but he still has made no effort to get a hold of me, even though we have several mutual friends. The way I see it, if he would like to patch things up, it's on him to do it. I was 11 when he left, he should be the adult and admit he screwed up, but he won't.

Many of the things I've been through with the whole situation govern the way I parent today. I look at it this way, either you can let the cycle of being a shitbag continue, or learn from the mistakes of others and make your life better. I chose the latter.

Go see your dad and get closure... I suspect he may need it more than you.

Compassion and forgiveness do not mean you condone what he did when you were a boy, it means you're heart is filled with what he obviously doesn't have.

YMMV
Good luck.

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:37:49 PM EDT

[#12]

Not really. We go shooting everyone once in a while, but we're...distant. I dunno.

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:43:43 PM EDT

[#13]

Fuck i hate these threads. My dad died when i was 11. Im 25 now. I never met my grandfather on my mothers side. and my grandfather on my fathers side died 3 years ago. Im not a big fan of my stepdad either. I enlisted in the Army this year in January. i wish one of them would be here to see it.

I hope im making them all proud.

Fucking dusty

Posted: 3/15/2011 10:58:46 PM EDT

[#14]

I'm 34 and my dad is 64. He's a cool guy and we'd hang out more if he didn't live almost three hours away and I didn't have a job that worked me six or seven days per week.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:00:51 PM EDT

[#15]

I'm 20. Dad is 55.

I go hunting with him, to shooting competitions with him, and we eat dinner whenever he's in town.

Typically meet up with him once a week.

Grandparents on the other hand, I don't visit much.

But I do call them every other day or so and talk for awhile.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:08:25 PM EDT

[#16]

Every year or two, I forget what its like, and spend some time with him. Then I remember why I don'tdo it more often.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:08:44 PM EDT

[#17]

Haven't spoken to him since November, when he woke me up from a nap by banging a steel trash can and telling me to get the fuck out of the house.

Funny, just a few days before he had sat me down and told me that he wanted me to know he really loved me.

Fucking magnetsdrugs, how do they work?

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:13:24 PM EDT

[#18]

I'm fortunate enough to have a great father, so I do. Got me into firearms and that's the only bad thing I can say about him

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:15:38 PM EDT

[#19]

Not nearly as much as I would like to, but he has a wife and kids, I'm 33 he is 50 and has kids much younger then me.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:19:32 PM EDT

[#20]

I wish I could but he's been gone since '99.

I miss him, a lot.

Enjoy your time with him while you can.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:20:29 PM EDT

[#21]

We had a falling out when I joined the military. I'll always be pissed at him for what he did but I also realize he's getting up there in years and he won't be around for long.

He pretty much abandoned me when I enlisted. The day before I left for basic, my entire immediate family got together. My brother has been off on his own for awhile and this was just getting together. My Dad never made it, instead bribing my brother to take him to the bar so he could meet one of his friends from highschool. He then lied to me about it and I never would've found out had my brother not told me. My brother told him he told me about what happened and it took a little over a year for him to call me and apologize.

I can't forgive him, but he's still my dad.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:20:46 PM EDT

[#22]

Nope, don't have a lot in common, but he' a real good guy. Comes to my sons sporting events so we talk and catch up at those. When my son gets out of school I don't know what will bring us together.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:21:25 PM EDT

[#23]

I'd give anything to be able to hang out with my Dad again.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:23:20 PM EDT

[#24]

Dad just turned 83, I'm 49 and I call him about twice a year. He lives 70 miles away but after living with his bad choices, including a she-beast of a female he married that would love to kill me, I've had enough. It takes everything I have in me to make those 2 phone calls per year.

Those of you that are close to your dads and even enjoy them, I'm glad for you. Treasure it for the ones of us that can't get close.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:26:22 PM EDT

[#25]

Hard to when you didn't even see the man for 12-13 years.

Posted: 3/15/2011 11:28:28 PM EDT

[#26]

My dad passed away a couple of years ago.

I am very fortunate to have a step dad that I'm close with. He's been in my life since I was 5 (29 now), and we shoot together almost every weekend. I probably hang out with him more than any of my other friends.

Posted: 3/16/2011 12:14:55 AM EDT

[#27]

He is dead.

Prior to his passing I made a point to see him once a month.

My younger brother never bothered to come around.

I feel pretty good about how things ended.

My brother is all torn up.

YMMV.

Posted: 3/16/2011 12:17:29 AM EDT

[#28]

I would if I could. I'm active duty and stationed a long way from home. I don't get to see him but about once a year.

Same goes for the rest of my family too.

Posted: 3/16/2011 12:23:01 AM EDT

[#29]

43 / 62

Drink beer and hang out every Friday night. Multiple vacations a year together.
He's my best friend and I cherish every moment knowing it wont last forever

Posted: 3/16/2011 12:24:41 AM EDT

[#30]

As little as I can.

Was always a piece of shit when I was younger, still is.

Posted: 3/16/2011 12:24:55 AM EDT

[#31]

Quoted:
My best friend. For real.

Same here.

Posted: 3/16/2011 12:26:01 AM EDT

[#32]

I used to, before he died last November at 54 years old.

Posted: 3/16/2011 12:52:35 AM EDT

[#33]

Not as often as I'd like to. I moved about two years ago and only live about 10 miles away but I don't see him as much as I should

Posted: 3/16/2011 1:01:19 AM EDT

[#34]

We used to.

These days, I dunno. He's happy chasing around his grandkids and doing stuff with his family. I just let him be and don't bug him other than asking how he's doing. I suppose in the last year or so we both finally figured he never was the Dad I needed and I was never the son he wanted. There is no grudge, anger or anything like that. Just two different people.

Posted: 3/16/2011 1:13:02 AM EDT

[#35]

Nope. The worthless fuck walked out 60 years ago, I've only seen a photo of him.

Posted: 3/16/2011 1:16:10 AM EDT

[#36]

I wish I could hang out with my dad.

Posted: 3/16/2011 1:29:23 AM EDT

[#37]

I did somewhat. Now that he's passed away, I wish I had spent more time with him.

Posted: 3/16/2011 1:34:25 AM EDT

[#38]

Mine passed away last August. I wish I had spent more time with him. I can't wait until the summer so I can go fishing, but I know as soon as I get up there I'm going to break down.

Posted: 3/16/2011 1:46:06 AM EDT

[#39]

Mine died 17 years ago this month. Miss him.

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:02:08 AM EDT

[#40]

As much as possible. We can frequently be found dragging every last catfish out of Harvey County Lake on summer nights when we go home to visit.

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:05:06 AM EDT

[#41]

Not much. We don't really have a whole lot in common. Usually when we do these days it's me driving him all over town for business that is his own that he should really be taking care of himself. I am just of the mindset that if there is something you can do for yourself, do it yourself. I usually don't like involving other people unless I have to. He is of the mindset of why do something when you can have somebody else do it for you. When my brother and I were kids he'd have a random friend that might have been over at the house take us home after we'd been there for the weekend, I fucking shit you not. He didn't want to fucking drive across town to take us home to our mother's house because it was inconvenient, but didn't mind inconveniencing a fucking friend with his joint custody arrangement.

Then there's the fact that we usually wind up getting something to eat at a restaurant. Normally this would be great, and sometimes it is and we bullshit and talk, but it bugs the living shit out of me that he is almost always an ass to the server. They seem to never do anything good enough in his eyes. He asks for a steak medium rare, and he never fails to tell them that they steak is medium or medium well and that they need to take it back and get him another steak. He made our waitress cry one year when we were out for my birthday with family.

Then he almost always strikes up a conversation with people around us if we are waiting somewhere for something. Many times it's the same stuff I've heard him tell or talk about with other people a hundred times over the past 20 years. He'll always bring up the fact that he was in the Navy during Vietnam, no matter what topic of conversation he is engaging said stranger with. I am thankful for every former serviceman's time spent defending our country and its interests, but come on. Nobody likes a braggart.
I know I'll miss him to death when he's gone. I just wish he'd change some of his ways.

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:06:30 AM EDT

[#42]

I wish could

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:24:33 AM EDT

[#43]

I hang out with him all the time. His medical problems have left him to the point that he can barely get up to do anything anymore, so we can't hunt, shoot, fish, or anything together... but we still sit around and talk guns and history and politics, watch movies, tell old stories. It's hard to be around him, with him being unable to do all the things he enjoys, but I wouldn't give up the time we've spent together for anything.

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:28:38 AM EDT

[#44]

Yep. Me and my dad and younger brother are best friends. He has given me alot of the guidance I have had in my life, and has never steered me wrong. My brother is 25, I am 27, and my dad is 62, so we try to do everything we can to help eachother with stuff. My brother and I are often at my parents house working with him on remodeling things. We also work on cars together. I hope one day to help him on his dream car (64 Marauder). Hopefully soon. I am always scared of running out of time with the guy

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:39:55 AM EDT

[#45]

Sad thread.

I live maybe two "blocks" from my dad. I see him at least 3 times a week.

We take his old ass on vacation with us as he likes the grand babies.

I'm very appreciative of our relationship, it hasn't always been like that.

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:45:58 AM EDT

[#46]

My dad is dead, so I won't be hanging out with him for a while....

Actually, we were never close. He was an absentee father who preferred the company of his job and cheating on my Mom.

My son will be able to say he hangs out with his Dad. We have a fantastic relationship.

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:48:35 AM EDT

[#47]

I wish I did while he was still alive. He's gone now. He was 72.

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:49:38 AM EDT

[#48]

I wish, he died in his early 40s.

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:54:44 AM EDT

[#49]

Yes he is my best friend.

We are going to Africa in the fall on safari, he decided that instead of saving money to give to me when he kicks it we are gonna hunt the world together. I could not be happier.

He is litterally the best person I ahve ever met. All my friends that have met him call him "The Most Interesting Man in the World" cause he has the same beard and has had some crazy ass adventures while working as an undercover game warden.

Posted: 3/16/2011 2:57:50 AM EDT

[#50]

I talk to him when I visit my mom. We definitely don't "hang out". We have never gotten along well, although it has gotten better ever since I moved out and joined the army 25 years ago.

The opposite of Love is not Hate, it is Indifference. That about sums up my feelings towards my dad.

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Do you hang out with your dad? (Page 2 of 4)

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