Posted: 12/26/2009 4:44:01 PM EDT
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What do you say to grandparents that do not even have the common decency to spend 20 bucks on their only grandson? What do you say to them after 19 years of drama and beeing lied to, stolen from and having to hide out in your own house with the swat team and search dogs around the house looking for a crackhead family member that is on the way to kill you, your son and your husband? What do you say to these people who have lied in court to protect said crackhead brother?But dont care that husband was injured overseas and cant even so much as utter a "I am sorry this happend or if you need anything let us know?" 19 yeas I have kept my mouth shut to avoid any more drama and conflict between his parents and out of respect for my husband, after all they are his parents. They dont like me.. never have , but I was allways good enough to cook german food for them and hand them money when they needed it. So now it has come to this.. no card ,no phonecall or even 20 bucks for their only grandson for X-mas. How can you treat a grandchild like this ? how can you even look at yourself in the mirror and sleep at night? Shame on you, you fucking assholes. I am done beeing quite. |
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You have more patience than I do. I have had to deal with family that comes with relationships and after a short time of being nice I got sick of being pissed on and gave back like they gave me. It really didn't end badly, it mostly taught them to stop fucking with me. YMMV. |
Wow. 
What do you say? Nothing. You hold your head up and revel in the fact that you have more class in your little finger than they do in their whole bodies, and you refuse to let them drag you down to their level. Your son will realize (if he hasn't already) the situation with them and his relationship will alter accordingly. Their loss, not his. |
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Quoted:
Wow.
What do you say? Nothing. You hold your head up and revel in the fact that you have more class in your little finger than they do in their whole bodies, and you refuse to let them drag you down to their level. Your son will realize (if he hasn't already) the situation with them and his relationship will alter accordingly. Their loss, not his. this. he will learn - if he hasn't already - that some people care about others and some people don't. as for what I would say? likely nothing - ever again. think "ignore button" only for life. it would go like this: speak to me? get a blank stare before I look away since I don't really see anyone standing where that noise just came from. get confrontational about it? be ready for Mama Lion because you're gonna hear exactly what I think about you. I don't yell, but I say things in such a way that people need a minute to let all the levels sink in. calm, concise, cold. they don't deserve one moment of passion from you - no frustration, no hurt, nothing. they deserve nothing. hang in there, sweet girl... once you choose to move on, which it sounds like you have, life gets a lot better. 
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Quoted: Wow. What do you say? Nothing. You hold your head up and revel in the fact that you have more class in your little finger than they do in their whole bodies, and you refuse to let them drag you down to their level. Your son will realize (if he hasn't already) the situation with them and his relationship will alter accordingly. Their loss, not his. This. BTDT and it really is the best path. Not saying you should go out of your way for them, either. |
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Yup... I do so agree with all of you here..
I was just so pissed off.. hurt.. dissappointed and still am.. I did say something to her.. didnt cuss ..didnt yell.. but I am sure she got the point. I had mortal thoughts about these people .. and still do.. Nothing we ever do or say will make a difference to them anyway. But the good part is we are moving soon.. .. and then they can all wallow in their own shit `til hell feeezes over 
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Quoted:
What do you say to grandparents that do not even have the common decency to spend 20 bucks on their only grandson? What do you say to them after 19 years of drama and beeing lied to, stolen from and having to hide out in your own house with the swat team and search dogs around the house looking for a crackhead family member that is on the way to kill you, your son and your husband? What do you say to these people who have lied in court to protect said crackhead brother?But dont care that husband was injured overseas and cant even so much as utter a "I am sorry this happend or if you need anything let us know?" 19 yeas I have kept my mouth shut to avoid any more drama and conflict between his parents and out of respect for my husband, after all they are his parents. They dont like me.. never have , but I was allways good enough to cook german food for them and hand them money when they needed it. So now it has come to this.. no card ,no phonecall or even 20 bucks for their only grandson for X-mas. How can you treat a grandchild like this ? how can you even look at yourself in the mirror and sleep at night? Shame on you, you fucking assholes. I am done beeing quite. My sons mom hasn't even talked to him in almost 9 years. You can't fix stupid so quit trying and putting yourself into an early grave. |
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I feel your pain.. my remaining grandfather sent some money for a gift when my daughter was born 15 years ago. we thanked him, sent him pictures.. last we ever heard from him. he has never seen her. I've sent cards/letters, they don't get sent back, so I can only assume they made it there (?) My mom and my dad both say he'd like to hear from me  I sent another one this year with all the other Christmas Cards, we'll see what happens. hang in there! |
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Somehow you've got to move past it.
My dad didn't send me a birthday card this year (a couple weeks before Christmas) nor did he send me a Christmas card. So no Christmas gift from my dad, and that means my daughter didn't get one either. He treats my sister and her son the same way. But dad will go on and on about the kids he meets at church or the high school athletes he befriends and how great they are. And how the little ones will run up to him and sit in his lap and on and on and on..... And then he laments about how he just doesn't know his grand daughter. Granted we do live 500 miles apart but still he puts no effort into a relationship himself. Sis and I have decided that dad has no idea how to be a parent but he knows how to be a great friend. And that's the problem, he has no idea how to relate to his kids and grandkids. I can't tell you how to get past this, other than praying for strength and wisdom, but know you're not alone with your fustratations. |